The Resident Leader

As time went on, things got worse. Without guidance from Mirrorboy, the group began to fall into a downward spiral of drugs and alcohol. No one was there to comfort them or tell them what they were doing wrong. One by one, the all succumbed to the depression of the underworld once more.

I felt like my presence was hurting them. The hole were Mirrorboy had been was supposed to be empty. But now there's some stranger filling it in and they can't cope. I'm nothing like Mirroryboy. He was good spirited and cocky, despite all the messed up shit he coped with. I wasn't like that, I was a sarcastic little bastard. Their depression was dragging me down, and mine dragging them.

Stuart and Lee had followed me out to my car. They understood why I was here, to fill in for Mirrorboy. But we all knew we'd been holding on for too long, now he needed to be left to rest in body and in spirit. The guilt still weighed me down, and I felt like a lost cause in a huge world. So I was leaving, to leave him alone an give him the peace he deserved.

"What are you gonna do when you get back home?" Stuart asked, watching me slam the carboot.

"Fucking run." I replied. I didn't know really, I hadn't made any plans. I just wanted away before the situation got any worse. I was afraid of hurting them anymore.

"What's it like there?" Lee asked.

"It's messed up. No one gives two shits about anyone there!" I sighed.

I liked this place so much more than the city. It was calm and relaxed, people recognised each other. Alright, this place had no ambition or goal but community made up for that. It was so easy to escape here, to just relax and wind down. In the city, there were very few places you could run to in order to be alone. Nowhere was completely free of earthly scum. People recognised me everywhere I went, for good reasons and bad reasons. I just wanted to escape it all.

"That's home, though." I sighed sadly. "Will you be boys alright?" I asked. I didn't want to just leave them in the blue, not after all they'd been through. Losing a friend was never easy. They seemed so young and innocent, vulnerable to everything.

"We'll work something out," Lee explained. "It can only get better with time."

"What if it doesn't?" I asked.

He paused for a moment and stared at the ground, shuffling his feet. "He told me it would. He promised me, and he never broke his promises."

He watched me with a smile, reassuring me he would be okay if he kept his faith in Mirrorboy. I smiled in return, unsure of what to say.

They boys in this place were too good, they were all so sweet and pleasant. I didn't want to leave them, now I'd found my few friends.

"Look after yourselves, lads. Promise you'll come up and check out the city some day?" I asked with a grin. The nodded, and Lee stepped forwards.

"Thanks for staying, you didn't need to," He mumbled quietly. He stepped even closer and hugged me tightly. His head rested against my neck, and I could feel his salty tears soaking my shirt. "Means a lot to me, probably did to him too. You really helped change my ideas of his death and helped me see the best in it. I wouldn't have been able to cope without that."

"It's alright, just thought I needed a break too." I grinned at him and slapped his back friendly. He stepped back, shoulder to shoulder with Stuart.

Without another word I stepped into my car an started the engine. The sun was beginning to set, leaving me with a nice, easy ride back in the darkness. The car raced off across the dirt road, and a few minutes later I was on the concrete, away from the boys in the little town.

It felt strange to be going home. But I guess that's what Mirrorboy would've wanted. We were the resident leaders of our own towns, and that was his. He was the leader there, and I in the city. We defied the authority, destroyed the rules and changed the way people see the world. We were a completely different breed of human.

And then I ripped that defiance and speciality from him with simple rejection.