All That I've Got

It’d been two weeks since the nightclub fire. The Jury seemed to have backed off of Frank’s trail, though no one knew why. Chris believed that they were planning some sort of retaliation, and that scared the shit out of Frank.

Oblivious to the Individual world, the media had kept a constant stream of coverage on the story over the weeks.They would describe the attacks on clubgoers just moments before the fire, and how the world was lucky no one had been seriously hurt.

It was a big enough deal that there’d been reporters waiting for Frank when he’d woken up in the hospital, lungs aching and skin burnt. Chris had managed to get rid of them, saving Frank from having to recall everything and risk being seen on TV.

A week ago, Frank had been released from the hospital with tons of painkillers pumping through his veins. He’d been surprised when Aaronlyn and Chris had taken him back to the apartment, and not some cheap hotel in the suburbs.

“The UAI haven’t issued an evacuation, so we haven’t left.” Chris had explained, and Frank had felt relief bloom in his chest. He couldn’t imagine having uprooted another family due to his fuck-ups.

Frank had limped into the apartment, and the clean white walls and friendly faces had almost made him cry. Natalie had wrapped him in a hug, Lucie joining and smashing her face against Frank’s legs (the only place she could reach). Alex had hugged Frank too, without a single joke. Frank had been struck speechless by Alex’s muteness- and had finally realized that Alex must’ve been really upset- too upset even for jokes.

Frank’s happiness had stopped there, however. Frank had learned that Mark had left. Disappearing in the night, before Frank could come with him or even say goodbye. Chris and everyone had tried to comfort Frank- they’d tried to convince him it was better this way. That Mark and Gerard would be okay- okay and safe.

Frank had let them keep telling him that for weeks now. It wasn’t that he believed it- it was that he didn’t have anything else to have faith in. No phone number, and no idea where his old family was. No way back to the past.

----

Frank went back to school eventually, feeling as incomplete as ever. He spent his classes planning ways to get back to Gerard, then feeling crushing loss at the thought of leaving the family he’d found here.

He also spent a lot of time wondering about his mom. If she was okay, and if she’d stopped hiding. If she was looking for Frank.

The only thing that stopped his consuming thoughts was smoking. Frank knew his doctors would have aneurisms if they knew, but he did it anyways. The shade of the smoke comforted him. Frank felt that if he was a color, he’d be cigarette smoke gray, definitely.

Frank was smoking one day, leaning against the school’s wall in the freezing cold. He was on his fourth cigarette and second missed class when someone came around the corner.

The kid was stocky, and looked even more out of place in the school’s uniform than Frank. He had short blonde hair, a lip ring, and his own cigarette in his hand.

Frank was still staring when the kid finally caught sight of him. The boy’s mouth dropped open, and his cigarette dropped into the snow- sizzling. Frank’s reaction was pretty much the same.

“Frank?!” the boy shouted, then he had his arms around Frank’s middle, and they were squeezing each other as if the world was falling away around them.

It took Frank a moment for the name to surface on his tongue, but when it did, he felt his chest swell as big as his grin. “Bob!”

Bob had picked Frank up off the frosted ground and Frank’s feet were swinging around and the air warmed over with their laughs.

“I can’t believe you’re here! I can’t believe you’re alive, Frankie,” Bob roared when he let Frank down.

“I- I really can’t either,” Frank said, his entire face hurting from grinning. “I also can’t believe I remember you.”

“Why wouldn’t you, Frank?” Bob managed to raise his voice even louder.

Frank realized what he’d said, but managed to shrug it off with a question. “Why can’t you believe I’m alive?”

Bob’s mouth dropped open even wider than before. “Frank. You’ve been missing for two months. The police always insisted you’d moved, but Ray and I knew better. Haven’t you seen all the messages we’ve sent you? The calls? We’ve been putting up posters for you, you fuck!” Bob was out of breath, huffing and angry but his face was open and sincere.

Frank’s heart swelled again. They’d looked for him. He hadn’t been wiped from his old life completely. They’d even put up fucking posters!

Frank could picture Bob, with a guy with an afro- Ray- trudging through the Jersey snow and rain to tack up ugly pictures of Frank around the town.

Just the thought had Frank back to attacking Bob with hugs. With every second, Frank could feel his memories stitching up their holes, and being with Bob was as easy as breathing.

He pulled away again, then quickly fumbled in his pocket for new cigarettes, feeling bad about making Bob drop his. They lit up together, but Bob’s eyes never left Frank’s face, as if Frank would dissipate into the freezing air like melting snow.

Frank blew out his smoke and smiled at Bob. “Yeah- about my phone- I haven’t had it in two months. Some shit went down, and since then I’ve been here.”

Bob looked skeptical, but he loved Frank enough to not press him. “Okay. As long as you were safe. And as long as you come home, Frankie.”

Frank paused with his cigarette halfway to his mouth. “This is my home. . . and you’re here now. Why would I leave?”

Bob was silent for a long moment. “I am here. I was born and raised here, Frank,” Bob looked at Frank seriously, “but you don’t belong here. You’re Jersey through and through. And what about Gerard? What happened to you loving him?”

Frank’s mouth went dry. So many things were bouncing around in his head, and none of them would shut up and let him think. He belonged in Jersey. . . but knew he also belonged here. He belonged with Gerard, but he also belonged with Bob. It was the same decision Frank had refused to make in the nightclub’s bathroom.

Choose between Then and Now.

Frank went with the easiest question he could pick out of the chaos in his head. “I thought Gerard wasn’t in Jersey anymore?”

Bob blew his smoke away from them and shook his head. “No, he’s back. His whole family was gone for a while, but they moved back just before I left. I never got to see Gee, but Ray said he got a call from him- asking about you.”

“Me.” The syllable rolled off Frank’s tongue, and suddenly late-night words were ringing in his head the loudest. ‘I love you’.

Then Frank knew what he had to do, he knew the solution to one problem, and was able to push the others to the back of his mind.

“Thanks, Bobby,” Frank smiled.

And for once, Bob didn’t try to hurt Frank for the nickname. Instead the boy just grinned and hugged Frank tightly once again. Fate had brought them together, and Frank would keep it that way.