A Player With a Game

My heart raced as I anxiously waited for Matt to ring my doorbell. Two hours had passed and I was starting to think that I might had scared him away. Who even answers a door with a towel on? I swallowed my thoughts and walked into the kitchen, taking off my white shoes to reveal my colorful, thigh high socks.

I looked at the clean kitchen and remembered how Damen would always have yummy, healthy food for me around this time a day. But I had let myself fall into a horrible, fat, sugar, and salt filled diet. I started thinking that I should continue making him proud, I should keep living as if he's already there. Suddenly, the doorbell rang. I jumped, feeling my knees starting to shake.

I ran to the door, looking out the peephole to see Matt's big green eyes staring right through me. I looked down to see his deformed body. Sadly, peep holes could never make anyone look even decent. I opened the door, looking at Matt who stood before me with a bag of food and a smile on his face, "I thought you might need some cheer up food," he said, "Can I come in?"

I smiled and moving aside for him to see the cold prison I called home, "You can come into the kitchen," I said, feeling him follow me until we arrived at the kitchen. He sat on a big wooden chair, placing the white container of food in front of him and then sliding it towards me.

"I'm not sure what you like. But everyone likes Chinese."

I smiled, opening the container that revealed chicken, broccoli, and rice, "Thanks, I love it."

"You're welcome," he smiled, "So, how have you been?" his elbow rested on the table before him, his hand turning into a fist and his face sitting on top of it.

"Um, not so good, to be honest. I'm missing him badly," I sighed, trying my hardest to hold back my emotions, the last thing I wanted to do was scare him away with my awfully loud crying, "It's just - I'm lonely here."

"Yeah, I can't say that I one hundred percent relate to you, but in a way, I understand what you're going through right now."

"How so?" I asked, feeling curious.

His face became red and he looked down at his now crossed hands. The veins on the side of his head grew bigger and the thick, healthy muscles he carried on his arms flexed, "I was -, I was married once. Not so long ago, actually. My wife left me, she said she had her reasons. So, for a while I spent time walking around my house, depressed, thinking I was a failure and didn't deserve to be happy. When I walked in here I actually had a flashback because it's as dark and as cold as it was back then. I didn't eat for a few days and then I spend weeks eating nothing but junk food and drinking beer. I was actually drunk all the time. I even started smoking weed, which is not something I normally do. I was just a mess. So I gained a lot of weight, I looked horrible and unhealthy. But in the end, I realized that I needed to become a stronger person. That situation helped me. And even though it's hard because your uncle is gone, you need to remember that in a way this can make you stronger. Just think, you can help people who are going through similar things now and you can better yourself too. I mean, I did. I wasn't so fit before. The last time she saw me she was pretty much in shock. But don't look back at the bad times, alright? Remember the good things about your uncle. That's what will keep you going."

I looked down at my socks, not sure what to say. He didn't need to get so personal with me, I was a nobody to him. But for some reason, he did. And I actually felt glad he had.

"Too much for a first actual conversation?" he questioned, letting out a nervous laugh.

"No, no, it's just, it's crazy because I'm going through the same exact thing. I mean, except with my uncle."

"I'll be honest, you look a lot different than you looked the first time I saw you. I haven't seen you leave the house. I mean, I do sometimes check to see if you're outside so I can go and speak with you. But there was no sign of you being here. So I didn't show up until today. I actually thought you had moved or something. But, if you let me, I'd like to help you out. I want to help you get onto your feet again."

"Thanks, Matt. I appreciate it."

He smiled, reaching over to my lap and grabbing my hand, "I'm gonna leave now so you can eat. I'll see you tomorrow. How about we hit the gym."

"Um, sure."

"Alright, I'll be here to pick you up at around ten. That good?"

"Okay, yeah, sounds great. Thanks again, I'll walk you out."

I got up, following him out the door and taking one last look at him. Finally.

"Well, be ready because when I work out, it's an actual work out."

"I can tell." I laughed. He ran down the stairs and I watched as he turned to go to his home. I closed the door behind me, sighing and letting out a big smile.

Everything he told me, and how much it'd meant to me. But for some reason the only thing I thought was how horrible I looked when I worked out.