Completely Undone

Cinnie gnawed on her bottom lip ripping the dry skin off as she slowly folded her clothes neatly into her suitcase. Right when she woke up she felt heaviness in her heart. Today is the day that she will be flying back home. Home, she actually isn’t looking forward to flying to the place she called home since birth.

A deep sigh escaped her lips as she circled the room checking to see if she missed anything. Weaving her ombre hair into a braid, she left her bangs and some curls frame her face. Cinnie rubbed her hands together as she did a mental checklist; she rather have everything packed now than to panic later that she forgot something while she rushed trying jam everything on her bag.

“Packed already? Are you trying to bum me out? A dark cloud just appeared above me and always be there until you return.” Paty pouted openly hugging her best friend mumbling how much she is going to miss her.

Cinnie hugged her back just as passionately, “I’m not leaving yet. I leave in the evening, remember?”

“I know, but you just reminded me that you are leaving today. Can’t you stay a little longer?” It is a long shot to ask such a task for Cinnie to stay when they already scheduled her to stay a few days longer than she should have the first time she planned this. Cinnie had to decline as much as she didn’t want to, she had work to attend to and Mina will drive her up the wall if she didn’t see her within the next few days.

“Are you going to see Tom?”

“Of course. I’m seeing him later on today, but right now I want to spend time with my girl.” Cinnie linked her arm with hers.

As much as Cinnie wanted to spend as much time with Tom as she wanted she couldn’t forget her best friend. Paty is one of the people she will miss the most and skipping spending quality time with her would be tragic in every sense of the word.

Paty grinned linking arms with her best friend walking around the streets of London. They didn’t have to do much in order to have fun. Cinnie and Paty took turns taking pictures at random places making silly faces, racing down streets. Paty for the most part was doing most of the noise as Cinnie followed her laughing loudly along the way.

“That’s it. Right there, be sexy, Cin.” Paty zoomed in as the girl sat near the fountain the water spraying on her hair and back. Right when she snapped the picture Cinnie felt her hand slip breaking her balance from her position. Paty watched in shock as her friend regained her balance only having her hand in the fountain creating a splash that hit her face and hair.

Paty laughed full heartedly at Cinnie’s gloomy expression. “Cheer up, mate. It’s not that bad.”

The wet woman rolled her eyes as she wiped the excess water off of her face before Paty offered her a hand. Pulling her up on her feet she patted her arm with a charming smile, “Let’s pop in the shops for a while. You need some English fashion for your trip home.”

Cinnie agreed as the two women wandered into a boutique. Staring in awe at the clothes both women plucked every single thing that caught their eye. Cinnie can handle shopping if the clothes appealed to her in some sense; naturally she chose some for Paty to try on, throwing them over towards her friend before bustling around to gather more things.

The women spent hours together, laughing and taunting one another. A beaming smile left their lips when the alarm that went off reminding Cinnie it was time to see Tom before she left. Paty quietly offered taking her over to Tom’s home before going back to her place and gathering her things.

“Thanks.” Cinnie pecked Paty’s cheek in gratitude.

Paty scoffed, “It’s nothing, darling. Go spend time with him. I’ll worry about over packing your bags with the new clothes.” A laugh was exchanged seeing the several bags that filled the backseat. Sliding out of the car, Cinnie zipped her hoodie before jogging towards the front door. Right when she reached the first steps Tom opened the door pulling the surprised girl inside.

Cinnie felt a jolt when he touched her and with his hand wrapped around her wrist, she gazed into his eyes to see a sad yet happy smile upon his lips. “Hi.” He whispered. She offered him the same response letting the quietness take over.

The weight of reality burdened them into facing the truth. The one that kept them from being together all the time or even establishing a relationship. Cinnie wrung her hands not knowing what to say as she looked around completely uncomfortable. She hated goodbyes or even ‘see you later’s’. Parting from a person she held close to her always ripped her heart in multiple ways.

“It’s hard not to think about, eh?” Tom forced a smile as his hand cupped her cheek tenderly. His eyes said everything he didn’t want her to leave; no he wanted her to stay. To find a job over here and be around him in every way possible, he wanted whatever they had to work out.

“Yeah.” Cinnie murmured. “Especially with what happened between us makes it harder to leave you.”

From the years of being in the friend zone it was a little easier leaving Tom whenever she had to only because of that reminder that he wasn’t hers. There was no establishment of anything except friendship and she accepted that. Until this special day, her birthday, the day everything changed between them.

Tom’s hand slowly released her wrist to hold onto her hand, lifting it to his lips and softly kissing her palm. He closed his eyes to relish her touch, her scent and her voice. He shouldn’t be so dramatic, but they just started. “It feels too soon. Everything is moving so fast and yet we barely scratched the surface.” Cinnie concurred in silence.

With everything they had done, the two tried to compile everything in the few days they had together hoping it will bring some fulfillment. It has only proved to them that they enjoyed each other’s company and only wanted more days with each other.

“We can always call each other, Skype and email. I’ll fly back whenever I can. We can figure it out.” Trying to be the optimistic one, Tom smiled hearing the same words he uttered to her not so long ago.

“I’ll probably be flying every week just to see you if that’s what it takes.” As those words left his mouth one thing popped into her mind. What were they? Both were making promises and talking like they are exclusive. She wanted to make sure that they were indeed on the same page.

When she said his name, his eyes grew a darker hue focusing on her having his full attention. “I was wondering—if uh, what is going on…between us?” Her hand gesturing to the small gap between them.

As his tongue flickered out to moisten his lips, her eyes admittedly followed. Tom didn’t want to tease her in such a serious conversation and spared her from the embarrassment. “I guess we never did establish anything, did we? I was hoping we were going to be exclusive. What do you think?” Their hands still intertwined, hopeful eyes stared into hers.

A small desperation rolled into her almost if she wanted to automatically say ‘yes’. Cinnie held her tongue to refrain from acting so rashly. “I don’t know.” She dumbly answered. She didn’t see the flash of disappointment in his face as her eyes were glued to the ground. “I don’t think it would be good for our relationship to start by me leaving so soon. I live in California and you live here. It’s too far…I think we should just stick to whatever this is to see if this will work out.”

Cinnie crawled back into her shell yet again. The trust that she had for their future relationship was slim to nil and he saw that. When he convinced her that they could work out, she felt so passionate about it, but with days of thinking it over she saw that it would be too bold to have a relationship solely based on phone calls, Skype and any communication device.

Instead of convincing her again, Tom stepped back not wanting to step over his boundaries too soon. He always acted rash wanting to move as fast as he can with everything. If he felt love for someone he didn’t waste time expressing it. Cinnie felt different. She wanted to know for certain before expressing any kind of emotion.

“Alright and if you don’t mind, I would enjoy a good snog before my beloved leaves.” A cheesy grin is placed on his lips as he pulled her in.

Cinnie shyly smiled, welcoming his advances. His beautiful lips landed upon hers sending her heart into a fluttering frenzy. A warm sensation enveloped the pit of her stomach as it seeped into every pore in her body. Her hesitant hands gripped the hem of his shirt as he snaked his arm around her waist bringing her closer to his warmth.

Tom naturally massaged his lips with hers, slow and tentatively observing her lip movements not being as fast as his due to inexperience. He didn’t know much about her dating background and could care less at the moment given the sensations that poured into his soul as he kissed her.

Thinking things through, he moved his foot between her feet forcing her to step back. This continued into her calves hit the couch, Cinnie grew confused until he leaned closer to her, her body naturally bending with his. Once her back hit the cushion she understood his intentions, she pressed her lips deeper into his as he hovered over her perfect form.

His hands moved from her face to the sides refraining from crushing her with his weight. He wasn’t afraid of suffocating her with his weight; she is larger than the other birds that he has dated. He actually felt more comfortable throwing his weight onto hers from time to time, but he didn’t want to surprise her by tossing his body onto hers. On his elbows now, his lips trailed to the corner of her lips his teeth softly sucking on her upper lip.

A giggle flew from her lips as Tom tried to suppress a smile. Butterfly kisses were sprinkled across her cheek and onto her neck, she wiggled under his touch. All of these ministrations were given a purpose. To make her feel comfortable enough for him to go a little further.

The ball of fire ignited in his belly spread like wildfire as her hands circled from the hem of his shirt to his waist. The small graze sent shivers down his spine until her hands were finally placed between his shoulder blades and the middle of his back. Tom raised a brow when she pressed her hands down bringing him closer to her.

“Don’t be shy, Tommy.” A small sparkle flickered in her dark brown eyes with a taunting grin.

Tom chuckled, “Never said I am, my dear.” Pressing a kiss to her forehead, he lowered himself towards her lips letting his body press firmly onto hers. Now he can feel the heat radiating from her face, a clue that she is indeed blushing from the contact.

He could squeeze her in adoration for being so adorable. Now with a little bit of encouragement he flicked his tongue out across her pink lips. Testing the waters, he waited to see if she will take the bait. Cinnie paused her movements when she felt something wet dart across her lips.

She opened her eyes in wonder, did he just—

Cinnie settled her rapid heartbeat until a minimum as she openly stared at Tom. He said and did nothing, only given her the time to react to his bold move. She didn’t think twice as she glided her tongue into his mouth with little experience she had. It felt odd having her tongue enter the moist and warm cavern of his mouth. When her tongue touched his, she wanted to laugh at the weird sensation.

Repressing it, she felt his moan vibrating her mouth. His tongue darted into her mouth once she retreated her dominating every inch of her mouth. He is clearly more experienced as he did things with his mouth that left her breathless.

Panting, regaining her breath, it hitched when his mouth traveled to her neck once more. His teeth grazed her soft skin; she tried to keep herself from retracting. The tickling sensation kept going until he sunk his teeth into her neck. A gasp left her lips as he continued to suck, nibble and tease her sensitive skin. A small moan came from her lips as her hand grabbed a handful of his hair.

She tugged roughly as he attacked the next area of her flesh, near her collarbone. Her hips lifted from the couch grinding against his. Naturally he dipped his arousal between her jean cladded legs.

Once a jolt was sent to the warmth between her legs it snapped her out of the lustful cloud that was cast over them. Pulling back, Cinnie bit her bottom lip. Tom groaned letting his head rest on her shoulder, “I don’t think it’s wise to bit your lip like that, love. It will only make me want you more.” His voice lowering an octave sending chills down her arms.

“Sorry.” She released her lip. It was then she realized that her hoodie was gone and her shirt was pulled down to her shoulders exposing a large amount of skin. A small blush graced her cheeks as she pulled up her sleeves and sat up.

Tom followed her example, moving to sit next to her. “It’s alright. S’not your fault that I want to devour each part of your skin and send you to a pleasurable comatose.” Cinnie shifted in her spot not knowing how to respond to such a suggestive comment.

“Thanks?” She squeaked.

He laughed, leaning his head against her shoulder. His eyes softened as he whispered, “I’m surely going to miss you, Cin.”

Cinnie pursed her lips as she felt something in her heart, a small ache throbbed. “I’m going to miss you too.”

Within an hour or so, the two dreadfully got up from their spot and Tom drove her to the terminal. The ride was quiet, hands laced together to remember what the other felt like. When they walked inside, they saw Paty and Ben already there with Cinnie’s belongings. A watery smile passed Cinnie’s lips as she greeted the two.

Pushing back her emotional state, Paty stated that she already signed her in along with her bags. Cinnie thanked her, swinging her carry-on bag on her shoulder. As they all walked towards the end where the monitors were, Cinnie spun on her heel looking at each of their faces.

“I’ll see you soon.”

It didn’t take a second for Paty to latch herself onto Cinnie with tears rolling down her cheeks. “You better believe it. Take care of yourself, okay? Look at me, I’m a mess.” Paty wiped her tears with a laugh. A small quiver on Cinnie’s lips exposed her feelings before she pushed them back again.

“Always do.” Cinnie kissed her best friend’s cheek. “Love you, hermana.”

“Love you too, sis.”

Parting from Paty with a comforting smile, Cinnie turned her gaze on Ben. Opening her arms, he enveloped her in an embrace. “Take care of her or I’ll kick your ass to the moon and back.” Ben laughed as he released the woman.

“Understood. Have a safe flight.” Ben then took Paty’s hand directing her distance away to give her and Tom some privacy.

If thinking she wasn’t going to break down then, she seriously thought she is going to now. Hiding her lips from Tom, she turned her head to the ground. The bustle of the crowd around them shrieked; Cinnie tried to be positive. That reminder helped her peer up with a teasing smile, “You look ridiculous in that getup.”

Gazing at his hooded figure made her smile endearingly. Tom wore a black hooded sweater, the hood on his head to hide from fans and sunglasses to help his disguise. The ginger facial hair that is peppered on his skin didn’t help much either, but he smiled nonetheless. “I had to do something if I wanted to drop you off here.”

His smile dropped, his hand combed through her ombre hair before pressing his forehead against hers. So many things he wanted to say, but refrained from doing so. He will see her again; he had to remind himself of that.

“It kills me to see you go.”

“Me too, but you’ll be seeing me soon…right?” Her brown eyes glanced up hopefully. Soon he will be doing promotions for the movie he shot earlier that year and he will travel to Los Angeles where he can see her again.

Tom nodded; still it was three months until then. That isn’t soon enough. He wanted to see her each and every day, but he can’t ask her to move out to London when her life is in L.A. A sigh left his lips before bringing his lips upon hers fiercely. Pouring every each of emotion into the kiss, he gripped her tightly not wanting her to go. No, he never wanted to let her go.

Forcing himself to release her, he turned his head away from her as quickly as he could giving her a few parting words of love before telling her to go before she missed her flight. Cinnie stiffly nodded, her heart breaking at each step that she took.

Looking back, she saw her group of friends waving at her. Following a deep breath she continued on towards the security line.