Status: On going

I'm Just a Could've Been, Would've Been.

Who's bold enough to believe?

We entered the house trying to get through crowds of people. it took some effort but we finally found the kitchen and there were the guys, minus Oli. They all passed us some shots and beers. After a couple hours it all hit me at once. I was drunk but not like I was on tour. I was just happy drunk. I woundered out to the backyard lighting up a cigarette taking a seat on the staires. I shivered from the cold air contemplating if I wanted to retret back inside or just enjoy it. I looked over the sky stairing at the white moon. I couldn't believe I actually came back. That I had a house in shefield and I was neighbors with this band. It was almost too good to be true until I saw a mop of brown hair emerging from the house coming my way. I was too drunk to run away from him. He smiled down at me taking a seat with enough distance that if I had swung at him he could doge it. We sat in silence for a while. Me with my heart almost ripping out of my chest. I looked at him from the corner of my eye. He was bitting on his lipring fidgiting with his hands. He was looking out into the woods.

"Whats up." I calmly turned my head towards him making him jump slightly. He looked down then back to my face.

"I see yeh' came back safe." He sounded annoyed and depressed at the same time. I simpley nodded finishing up my cigarette.

"L-look Aurora I need ta' talk to yeh' about-"

"I know, But I'm not ready to talk to you yet. Have a nice night Oliver, Maybe I'll see you around." I smiled holding back tears. I got up before he could say anything more and walked inside. I found Colleen chatting it up with Vegan. They looked like they were hitting it off pretty well. i didnt want to interupt so I texted her telling her I'd be sleeping on the blow up matteress in the house. I stumbbled back over to my new home and climbed into the crappy air matteress before cursing myself for being so vulnerable. I slipped into unconsiousness.

"Aurora!" I was shaken awake. My vision was blurry and the voice was foggy.

"Babe You have to get up!!" I jumped out of bed almost falling on my ass. I saw Colleen running around gathering up our belongings. I was confused until four muscular men barged into my house with our boxes from the Uhaul. I sighed going around the back to smoke a morning cigarette. I almost jumped out of my skin when I saw a tattooed slender boy holding two coffee cups sitting in the chair. I clutched my chest and head from the hangover before taking the coffee. I sighed putting the cigarette to my lips and inhaling the sweet smoke.

"Mornin'." Oli smiled sweetly at me.

"She let you in huh?" I looked over at him. He nodded before taking a swing of his coffee. We sat as we did the night before. In silence smoking cigarettes. We heard Colleen yelling at the movers to place things in the right spots. I smiled at her franticness. I turned to Oli who deep brown eyes were boring into the back of my head.

"So what brings you here this early saturday morning?" I narrowed my eyes at him. I knew what he had to say and I wasnt ready to listen.

"Yeh' know why I'm 'ere, Yeh' know I wanna explain myself." I looked away getting up. I walked back into my house with him trailing my footsteps.

"Aurora! Jus' listen to me! I jus' wanna make things right again!" He raised his voice obviously getting mad. The workers had left and Colleen was in the kitchen drinking coffee checking her store. I walked up staires into an empty room. I tried to close the door but his footing was too fast. Oli threw open the door making it hit the wall with a bang.

"Jus' let me explain please." I felt my eyes start to water. I was too weak right now for this. I shook my head. my voice was gone. Oli's hands grabbed mine looking into my eyes.

"Aurora." I shook my head letting the tears fall. His hand wiped them away while he sighed.

"I'm sorreh', For everythin' I can explain what happened if yeh' let me." I snapped my head at him making him jump.

"Get out." I pulled my hands away wipping my face. I watched his exsperession change in a matter of seconds.

"Are yeh' fuckin' with me?" He raised his voice again.

"Get out of my house." I pushed him out the door. I heard him grunt then heavy foot steps in the distance. I couldnt handle this right now. As soon as I heard our front door slam shut I ran down stares to Colleen.

"Collen why the fuck did you let him in?" I stomped into the kitchen screaming.

"Oh come on Rore. You have to talk to him some time. You live right around the god damn block. And youre going to be touring with them again! You cant just avoid him forever. Also I know you so well, youd feel better getting it over with now rather than later. Be a little nicer." She rolled her eyes going back to her work. I was fuming. How could she just bring him in here?! After three more cigarettes Collen and I started unpacking making our house look better than our last apartment. Since I was the reason we were here I had a bigger room.

The next few days went by just like that. Oli continued to come everyday to try to talk to me and I'd get mad slamming the door in his face. The guys came by now and then also.It was about 7 pm and I was hanging up my black curtains re-arranging my knick knacts when I got a knock on my door. I walked down staires to answer a very strung out looking Matt.

"Uh hey." I waved opening my door more to let him in. He didn't say anything, he just walked in and sat on the couch. I closed my door turning to him.

"Whats up?" I started gettting worried from the silence especially from Matt. His glossy eyes turned to me.

"S' Oli. Hes drunk, smashed acutalluy yeh' got ta' go there, Aurora. Hes a straigh' mess." I groaned covering my eyes.

"Why the fuck is everyone telling me to talk to him!? Cant anyone see I'm hurting as well? Why the hell do I have to help him?!" Matt glared at me getting up.

"The blocks fuckin' life is in danger an' yeh' gunna sit here an' be selfish!? Fuck yeh'!" he slammed my door. I groaned pulling a hoodie from the closet and running in the direction of Olis house. I never knew what his house looked like until I came accross a house with all the lights on and music blaring from inside. I saw a silouette of a man throwing something. I cringed walking up the steps to the door I rapped the door and waited. I repeated it about four times. With no avail I pushed open the door and walked up to where the yelling came from. It became faint and then started up again. I smelled weed and alcohol at his door. I inhaled and pushed open his door to see him mid swing to a picture. He froze glaring at me.

"What the fuck do yeh' want?!" He came at me. I was shoved into the wall with him towering over my body.

"Yeh' think yeh' can jus' walk in 'ere an' think everything's okay? 'Cause S' not!" He was two inches from my face. I was about to spat back an insult until Matt's voice came into my head, I swallowed my pride. "Oli you know why I'm here. I'm here to hear what you have to say." I crossed my arms narrowing my eyes. He threw back his head laughing mechanically. I rolled my eyes at him

"Well its now or never, Go on. Out with it." I taunted. He threw me another glare. He grabbed my face pulling it up to eye level with his almost close enough for our noses to graze eachother. I could almost taste the alcohol on his breath. I put my hand on his lowering it from my face. I could see his brown eyes soften for a second before they were overcome with almost black. He backed away from me clutching his hair. He let out a scream before pushing everything off of his table in one swing. I shuddered from the sudden noise. I took this chance to run towards the blaring music, switching it off and tackling Oli to the ground. I pinned him down trying to snap him back to reality.

"Oli you need to calm down!" He started bucking his legs from underneigth me. He was shaking his head trying to throw me off of him. I started to get nervous from the sudden movement. I leaned down and forced my lips to his. I couldnt think of anything but Oli, I put everything aside and kissed him. I kissed him with everything I had in me. His struggling stopped almost as if he was frozen. His hands found my face holding it against his own. We stayed like that for what seemed like hours until I felt his body relax. I got off of him and helped him up. We went to the bathroom to wash his face and I put him to bed. Neither of us said a word. He watched me clean up the broken debre of his chaos. I gave him a goodbye and walked home. I wasnt surprised to see Jona outside my home.

"You happy now?" I glared at him walking past leaving my door open for him. He smiled at me walking in closing the door behind him.
"I'm a little proud of yeh' he was a mess." I rolled my eyes grabbing two beers from the kitchen passing one to him. "This doesnt make things okay. I'm still not ready to talk to him." I blushed replaying the scene in my head probably for the hundreth time that night. It only made things more complicated between us. It only made me not want to talk to him even more. I was angry with myself for doing that. Even if it was to help Oliver. I chatted with Jona before shooeing him home and passing out.
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