Flourish

Bambi is up early, she is trying to avoid an awkward breakfast with her parents and her uncle. She likes being up early, it is nice to stand alone in the kitchen and not have to worry about anything other than the icy tiles and burnt toast. Bambi turns to face the toaster to grab her toast, she does not hear the patter of little footsteps on the floor and it is not until she turns to grab the butter does she realize that Karla is standing there in her small nightgown staring at her.

“You frightened me” Bambi says placing her toast on a plate, “Would you like a drink?” Karla continues to stare at Bambi with her dead eyes; it unnerves Bambi so she looks down and focuses on buttering her toast, not that she could stomach it at this point.

“No thank you” Karla mutters, Bambi grabs her plate and moves to sit at the island, and she waits for Karla to leave but the little girl just stands to the side almost waiting.

“Are you okay?”

“He snores” Karla says so quietly it takes Bambi a second to understand the little girl’s words,

“I know”

“It keeps me up”

“You could sleep in my bed”

“Oh he would not like that… He would be very, very mad, he doesn’t like you” Bambi’s nostrils flare in sadness as she tries to understand this poor sweet little girl,

“Karla… does he… does he touch you?” Bambi whispers, Karla smiles and it is the first smile Bambi has seen from the stoic little girl, Bambi frowns as Karla lets out a small laugh,

“I know what he did to you Alice,”

“He didn’t do anything to me” Bambi lies, picking up her toast only to return it to her plate, her juice is too orange and she suddenly hates orange juice, what was she thinking pouring such a stupid drink, she needs coffee, bitter and dark.

“It’s okay Alice” Karla says moving forward to pat Bambi on the back, Bambi wants to sink to the floor and collapse upon this small girl, how can such a little girl be so strong? Bambi is grown up yet she is so weak. “I won’t tell” Karla says moving away quickly, Bambi watches the girl run from the room, her heart is beating too fast and she wants to scream.

*

Bambi is uncomfortable all day, she feels like she has an itch but it is under her skin and no matter how hard she scratches she cannot stop the pesky itch. But Bambi tries, she tries, she scratches her arm and it starts to bleed, Ryan watches her from behind his desk, she is not working and he is worried. He notices her scratching at the same spot on her arm, “Alice” He says almost scolding her, Bambi looks from nothing in particular to her teacher, he is frowning at her and the whole class is staring, she looks down at her arm.

Bambi is so confused, her head is spinning, Ryan is making her head spin and she wants nothing more than to feel safe in his sweet embrace but she cannot, how dare she be so selfish, Bambi hates her mind for forgetting about Karla and her uncle under Ryan’s stare.

“I’m bleeding” She mutters very quietly,

“Outside Alice” The class is staring at Bambi like she is a carnival freak show, maybe she is. Ryan walks out the door shutting it behind Bambi, she stands against the wall because her legs are feeling weak and Bambi does not want to faint. “What the hell are you doing?” Bambi frowns at her teacher, she hates the raggedy beat her heart is suddenly making, it is confusing her and Bambi hates to be confused.

“You are the one who dragged me out here”

“Because you are sitting there scratching your arm till you freaking bleed” Ryan’s voice is rising and Bambi is acutely aware of the classrooms around her, Ryan lowers his head so he is able to whisper shout at this annoying girl. Bambi holds her arm like it is injured, it doesn’t really hurt but it is bleeding and Bambi does not want to get blood on Ryan. “What the hell Alice?”

“I’m sorry” Bambi says, she looks away from Ryan,

“What’s wrong?”

“Everything, every single thing is wrong, I cannot breath with you standing so close, you are making my head spin and I cannot think, you make my body so confused” Ryan stares at Bambi completely taken aback by her words, Bambi lets the truth spill from her mouth, “You make me confused” Bambi says staring defiantly at her teacher,

“I really want to kiss you” Ryan says very quietly, Ryan and Bambi are desperate to touch each other, to feel the others warmth and heat but they cannot and it is the single hardest thing for Ryan to keep his hands from Bambi. They stand staring into each other’s eyes for a while before they remember they need to get back to class. Ryan tells Bambi to stay back and she obliges they kiss long and hard under the florescent lights.

Bambi is so very confused.