Fancy Pants

-
Pulling my truck into the driveway, I saw a car I didn’t recognize parked in front of our house.

When I shut off the engine, I noticed the driver of the car was staring at me wide eyed, a phone in his hand. He was frantically speaking into it.

I immediately thought ‘drug dealer’. I’ve seen that happen before. .

I was sort of afraid to get out of my vehicle. Like, what if I get caught in the middle? I’ll get shot up. Maybe I should hide.

I sunk down into the car seat and stayed put for maybe five seconds before I saw a shadow out of the corner of my eye.

A figure was creeping down the side of my house. Reaching the corner of the building, they dropped to the ground and army-crawled the rest of the way to the awaiting car.

A getaway car.

No way. I sat up straight and stared at them. Is someone robbing my house? We met eyes and I recognized who it was.

Jeff.

What -

“THE FUCK YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?” I snapped out the window at him. He instantly froze, then dashed to the car. I hopped out of the driver’s seat, racing to the front of the car where I skidded to a stop just as Jeff ripped open the door.

I looked at him then the driver who I realized was Chris, waiting for an explanation. Their wide eyes looked at each other. They both began to stammer.

I mocked them, “‘Uh - uh, uh’ - Well…?”

“Natalie,” Chris began. “She said she forgot something in your house - her varsity jacket.”

“And was it there?”

“No,” they both said in unison shaking their heads. I gave them both a hard look. That couldn’t have just been it. They’re way too obvious.

But maybe it was. I don’t pay attention to what Natalie brings to my house and leaves with. She could’ve though.

I still asked, “Why didn’t she come over and get it?”

“Her dad,” Chris said with a shrug. I continued to glare at him, then at Jeff as he spoke.

“Uh,” his voice cracked. “Can we go now? I should’ve been home ten minutes ago. My mom’s gonna flip.”

I kept my eyes narrow. “Fine,” I caved. “But if I go in that house, and something is missing - no matter how miniscule - I’ll get you with a Math book. Got it?” I think you’ll be proud to know that since the so-called fight between dickhead and I happened, there’s a new understandable fear of me going around, and everyone’s caught it.

They tell me they’ve ‘got it,’ and I step aside to let them speed off. I went back to my truck to get my wallet I realized fell out of my pocket, also unhooking my iPod from the car radio. I head inside and see my mom chilling on the couch, doing laundry.

“Your friends stopped by,” she says, folding a towel. “Just left.”

“Yeah, I saw. Did they say why?”

“Jeffery said something about Natalie leaving her jacket here, but they couldn’t find it.”

“That sucks,” I muttered, heading down the hall, eager to check my room out to see if anything was different. I hear my mother say yeah, and that she hopes Natalie finds her jacket.

My door was open a crack. I pushed it open and looked around my room. It didn’t look like there was anything out of place at all, but I still checked my drawers and under and around my bed to be sure. Not finding anything to freak out over, I joined a sleeping Chewy on my bed.

What were they doing here? It couldn’t have been for Natalie’s jacket. Maybe. But I doubt it.

I pulled out my phone, going to my contacts. I skip down to Natalie’s number and begin to text her when I notice a black and grey jacket slumped in my computer chair.

Without getting up, I reached over and grabbed it.

A varsity jacket.

Natalie’s varsity jacket.

Well…maybe they really were here for her jacket. But why is it still here then? Why did they say they couldn’t find it when it was right there? Maybe Jeff forgot to grab it when he left. Maybe when Chris was calling Jeff to obviously tell him I was home, Jeff flipped and rushed out of here, neglecting to grab what they came for.

Maybe.

I went back to texting Natalie. I told her she left her jacket at my house, hoping she could clear it all up for me.

After a five minute wait, she answered, basically cursing Chris and Jeff for not getting it back to her.

‘I knew I couldn’t trust them to get it back. Greeeeaatt. Well, I’ll be over to get soon. Before 6, I hope.’

‘See you then, buddy.’

Okay, so…good. They were telling the truth, apparently. Hopefully.

But as I waited for 6:00 to roll around, I had that crazy feeling that I was being watched.

Please just be paranoia.

-

A few days later on the following Monday, I was back to waking up at 6:00am for school. I hushed Natalie when she loudly let me know she was here, told her to leave the room so I could change in private, and by seven we were on our way out.

I made sure to give Jeff the death glare when Natalie and I walked into homeroom. He tried to smile as Natalie snapped at him for failing to see her varsity jacket sitting plain as day on my computer chair. He actually blushed when he made excuses.

While Natalie ridiculed him, Emma moseyed on in. We caught eyes and exchanged hellos. Not having any part in what was going on between Natalie and Jeff right now, I went over to my desk, beckoning Emma over to sit in the chair next to me.

Watching the two as she took a seat, Emma questioned, “What is going on here?”

“Jeff’s oblivious.”

“Heard that!” he snapped, sticking his head out passed Natalie to ‘glare’ at me.

“Well, I said it loudly - are you coming over today?” I directed the question to Emma. “So we can finally finish that stupid paper? Or am I going to have to - against my will - go to your house?”

She grinned, leaning back slightly to stretch. Thinking, she looked up to the ceiling, her hands going to her lap. I stared at her hands, suddenly wanting to hold one of them…but then I realized how lame that was and ignored the urge.

“Whichever is okay with me,” she shrugged. “You still need to meet my father,” she pointed out with a smile.

“Mmm - no.”

“Yes!” she laughed. “You have to at some point. Why not now?”

“I’m not ready to die yet.”

“You will not die,” she continued to laugh.

“You don’t know that,” I said getting her to scrunch her smile into a pursed lip.

“If you want to keep seeing me, you will meet my father.” That made Natalie glance back at us quickly and she raised her brow at me, but she was smiling condescendingly so I don’t think she was ‘hurt’ by it or whatever. I also saw Jeff look at us too, and I swear it looked like he was beginning to eavesdrop on our conversation.

Actually, come to think of it, ever since Emma walked in, he’s been creepin’. I wanted conjure up a math book from outta nowhere and beat him over the head with it, screaming at him to not even think about trying anything on her, if that’s what he was planning.

I looked back at Emma’s awaiting face and watched it fall as I said, “Nope. See ya.”

Her jaw dropped as she feigned betrayal. “You - fine.” She looked straight ahead, crossing her arms, nose up in the air. “You will see me no more. Goodbye.” Not seeing her march out of the room, I knew she wasn’t serious. I waved a farewell.

“Later.”

Her jaw flung down again and she looked at me wide-eyed. “I am being serious. This is final time we speak.”

I furrowed my brows, leaning closer to her. “Uhm, what? Speak proper English, please.”

A gasp came from her mouth, but she continued to smile. “Oh, you are so - !” She ‘hit’ me on the shoulder. “Disrespectful, is what you are. You know what?” - she crossed her arms over her chest again, nose back to pointing towards the ceiling. - “I don’t even want you to meet him, anymore. He will not approve.”

“Exactly - so my house, it is,” I said favorably.

She clicked her tongue and gave me a narrow glare. Huffing a bunch of air out of her nose, her face fell, defeated. “Fine!” she grunted, stomping her foot down. I did the happy dance while she continued to glare. “You are crazy.”

I snapped my fingers at her with a wink. “For you.” I blew a kiss. She broke out giggling at me. I felt an odd sense of self-accomplishment from getting her to laugh so hard.

“Absolutely ridiculous.” Coming down from her laughing fit, she said, “If you are ‘crazy for me,’ you would meet my father.”

“Well, isn’t it obvious? I lied - and besides,” I added before she could react, “we already settled on going to my house, so deal with it.”

She muttered something in foreign, shaking her head at me, still smiling. “Okay,” she surrendered. “But at some time. Promise?”

I held out my pinky. “Pinky swear.” She didn’t hold up her pinky, so I grabbed it, hooking mine around hers.

She let out another laugh as the bell rang.

-

David somehow managed to avoid me all day. I seriously didn’t see him once, not even in study hall.

Oh well. For the best, I guess.

Anyway, according to Emmer over here, it’s better to sit at a table or desk when you study or working on anything, because idk your brain or something, so we’re working out in the dining room.

Oh, and yes, we still haven’t turned in that Psych paper. Mr. Davis never has a set day for anything big we have to turn in…which is dumb.

Yeah, so issue, okay, so the author is having writer’s block at the moment, so we’re not going to go into detail of this…uh, situation. See? Such bad writer’s block, can’t even think a proper word to describe, uh…this situation. (Author: sorry.)

We worked until my mother called and said she was going to stop by Walmart on her way home from work. Why’d we stop? Because I realized that this means we will be home alone a lot longer than we originally would’ve, and I’m a horny son of a bitch.

I flopped down onto my bed then sat up as Emma joined me seconds later. Our positions: her, lying down, belly up; me, sitting with my legs dangling off the side of the bed. We sat there a while.

“What is your mother doing again?” she asked after a while, sitting up. Now her back was facing me. I think she began to take of her shoes. That’s what it looked like, anyway.

Seeing her hold a pair of sandals and set them next to the foot of the bed, I answered, “She had to stop by Wal-Mart to get insulin - she’s diabetic.”

“Oh…okay.” She pulled her knees up to her chest. We sat there for a number of seconds before I had the need for physical contact. I shimmed my way over to her and dropped my chin on her shoulder, using her as some sort of pillow.

She propped her head down on mine as comfortably as she could and…we sat there a little bit more…until I decided to use her as a teddy bear, wrapping my arms around her waist, head on her back.

Not seeming to mind this at all, she giggled a bit as I slowly pulled her to position where she was laying down on her back and my face was right over her. She bit back her smile causing her cheek dimples to show.

And then…we were silent. And then…we kissed, all Spiderman-like. And then…Chewy shot out of the little den-ish room, and up onto the bed with a bark. He circled the pillows before plopping down on them, closing his eyes.

What a cock-block.

We all chilled on my bed, watching TV until I got annoyed with Chewy and shoved him to the floor. Take that, asshole.

And since Emma and I were now in a position that could lead to spooning, I wrapped my arms around her waist, somewhat forcing her to shift so she went from her laying on her back to her side, resting my head on the back of her shoulder, and we continued watching whatever we were watching.

And then I suddenly had to pee. Emma, not wanting my blander to explode on her and then have me die while she was caught in my death grip, let me up – after grumbling about how comfortable she was, of course.

I cursed my bladder as I got up and left the room. Who knows how long we have until my mom will be home and we haven’t even done anything besides kiss, and now I have to pee so that takes more time out of sexy alone-time.

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh.

I came back to Emma standing over at my computer desk with a book in her hands. She was reading intently, but closed the book on her index finger, keeping her place, as I wrapped my arms around her again, chin on her shoulder. Then I snuggled my face into her shoulder blade and sniffed her. She smelled like a girl, all pretty and stuff.

“Why, hello there,” she giggled. “Hey, while I have you here, you might as well give me your opinion: Do I smell good?”

I nodded, with an “Mmm-hmm,” face still on her back.

"Good."

As we slightly swayed, she reopened the book and continued reading.

Ugh. Woman. Stop that.

I swatted the book from her hands and it fell to the ground. I forced her to turn around…Haha. That rhymed. Kind of...right?

“Hey!” she whined with a pout. “I was reading that.”

“Don’t care,” I shrugged, smirking, pressing my lips to hers.

Instantly dropping her moppy-ness, she kissed back, getting on her tippy-toes, wrapping one arm halfway around my neck - because that’s as far as she could reach; the shorty - the other somewhere on my arm.

“You better have washed your hands,” she warned between kisses.

I responded to this by picking her up and carrying her to the bed where I flung her down - jk; gently placed. Is that better? I wasted no time laying on top of her, pressing our bodies together.

I needed this so badly. I have to convince her to go further.

I slowly went from caressing her leg to slipping that hand up her shirt, hand now resting on her hip, right above the lining of her jeans. I could feel her shiver. We stayed like this for several minutes until I gave a light tug to her bottoms, but she didn’t get it and ignored it.

Until I did it again.

She finally nodded stiffly and I tugged on them some more, kissing her jaw/neck. I pulled them off, leaving her in a big bulky jumper; it goes down to the stating of her knee, but was now worked up to under her breasts.

There was such a physical ache I felt that needed to be satisfied, and if it wasn’t, I swear I was going to die.

But this time, thank god, we didn’t stop at kissing or oral.

We finally went all the way.

And then got walked-in on by my mom.

Well…shit.