Status: Completed
Decided to Break It
Josh
I needed a smoke and I needed it now. Cutting’s not fun. Don’t get started. But you know what is fun, but you still shouldn’t do it? Coke. I sniffed a little in the bathroom after watching everyone at lunch. You know, Echo thinks she knows me and I thought she did too. She’s just like them. She doesn’t know anything. I’ve been sniffing this stuff for 2ish weeks now. It doesn’t make me hungry and it makes me forget, you know? I sat on the back stairs of the school and lit a cigarette. I heard the door behind me and I smiled, knowing exactly who it was. I turned around and saw Kevvy, not Echo, standing there and took a long drag of the cig. I did not expect to see him. “Hey man. What’s up?” How could I be mad at him? Besides Mike, he was the most genuine guy I knew. Ian being second to them both. I shrugged and he sat next to me.
“Did you hear Echo back there? I think she wanted to talk to you.” I took another drag and didn’t say anything. He got the hint and we sat there a little longer in silence before he broke it again. “I don’t wanna mess up our friendship, Josh.” His words felt tingly on my skin. This wasn’t the best time for my high to reach its climax but I couldn’t help it. I tried to keep my composure. “Ish fine, done wor’ ‘bout it.” I slurred, but tried to keep my eyes focused. “Tell me if this isn’t okay. I like her but we’ve been friends for years, man. And you knew her before me. So…” “Naw, min. Tis okee.” I smiled at him and he scrunched up his face a little. “Oh. Okay, then. Can I bum one?” I knew Kevvy didn’t smoke but I handed him one anyway and we sat in silence, smoking our cigarettes.
After school, I met up with Vic, this Mexican kid with long hair who went to the reform school across town. I met him when we were both in juvie- me for my anger and him for selling drugs. So… you can see why I met up with him. He handed me the little baggie and I gave him the money before realizing it wasn’t Coke. “Heroin.” Vic said quietly and put his finger to his lips. “This isn’t…” “It’s better. A great batch too.” “But…” “Listen, I know what you’re doing. I’m not an average dealer, dude. I know you’re numbing, I don’t fuck with that.” I squinted at him. “This’ll give you the effect you need but it’s safer. Less addicting too. You may not sleep or eat though.” “SOLD!” I yelled excitedly and opened the bag. “You won’t need much, man. It’ll last you.” I’m pretty sure he lied about it being “safer”.
“I’m in love with you.” I said repeatedly in my room. I was pacing back and forth in front of my bed, high as fuck. I stopped and took a deep breath. “Echo, I love you.” I kept pacing back and forth, trying to get the words right. I needed to tell Echo the truth right now but I didn’t want her to think I was crazy. It had to be perfect. The perfect setting and the perfect moment and the perfect… the perfect everything. I started shaking my head and drumming on my legs as I heard the door open to my basement room. I didn’t stop drumming as Mike, Ian and Matt came down the stairs. “WHAT UPPPP?!” I yelled to the beat of the thigh-drums. Mike laughed. “You’re crazy. Shall we begin?” He started to take his bass out of the case. “Of course! Tonight’s practice is gonna be legit!” I jumped on my bed and started dancing to… well, nothing. Nothing was playing. Ian laughed. “Okay man, calm down. Let’s focus.” “I know you.” Matt said to me accusingly. I stopped jumping and looked dead at his face. “Do you now?” Was all I said before Mike started strumming his bass. “Come on guys, shut up!” I smiled.
“Did you hear Echo back there? I think she wanted to talk to you.” I took another drag and didn’t say anything. He got the hint and we sat there a little longer in silence before he broke it again. “I don’t wanna mess up our friendship, Josh.” His words felt tingly on my skin. This wasn’t the best time for my high to reach its climax but I couldn’t help it. I tried to keep my composure. “Ish fine, done wor’ ‘bout it.” I slurred, but tried to keep my eyes focused. “Tell me if this isn’t okay. I like her but we’ve been friends for years, man. And you knew her before me. So…” “Naw, min. Tis okee.” I smiled at him and he scrunched up his face a little. “Oh. Okay, then. Can I bum one?” I knew Kevvy didn’t smoke but I handed him one anyway and we sat in silence, smoking our cigarettes.
After school, I met up with Vic, this Mexican kid with long hair who went to the reform school across town. I met him when we were both in juvie- me for my anger and him for selling drugs. So… you can see why I met up with him. He handed me the little baggie and I gave him the money before realizing it wasn’t Coke. “Heroin.” Vic said quietly and put his finger to his lips. “This isn’t…” “It’s better. A great batch too.” “But…” “Listen, I know what you’re doing. I’m not an average dealer, dude. I know you’re numbing, I don’t fuck with that.” I squinted at him. “This’ll give you the effect you need but it’s safer. Less addicting too. You may not sleep or eat though.” “SOLD!” I yelled excitedly and opened the bag. “You won’t need much, man. It’ll last you.” I’m pretty sure he lied about it being “safer”.
“I’m in love with you.” I said repeatedly in my room. I was pacing back and forth in front of my bed, high as fuck. I stopped and took a deep breath. “Echo, I love you.” I kept pacing back and forth, trying to get the words right. I needed to tell Echo the truth right now but I didn’t want her to think I was crazy. It had to be perfect. The perfect setting and the perfect moment and the perfect… the perfect everything. I started shaking my head and drumming on my legs as I heard the door open to my basement room. I didn’t stop drumming as Mike, Ian and Matt came down the stairs. “WHAT UPPPP?!” I yelled to the beat of the thigh-drums. Mike laughed. “You’re crazy. Shall we begin?” He started to take his bass out of the case. “Of course! Tonight’s practice is gonna be legit!” I jumped on my bed and started dancing to… well, nothing. Nothing was playing. Ian laughed. “Okay man, calm down. Let’s focus.” “I know you.” Matt said to me accusingly. I stopped jumping and looked dead at his face. “Do you now?” Was all I said before Mike started strumming his bass. “Come on guys, shut up!” I smiled.