Souvenirs From Dead Worlds

Sam had fallen asleep, his legs dangling over the end of the bed, while Kias lay with his head on Sam's chest, listening to Sam's heart beat. When the silk of Sam's shirt started sticking uncomfortably to Kias' face, Kias sat up and stretched.

Kias wasn't as confident about his new role as he'd let Sam believe, but he had known if he'd shown any hesitation Sam wouldn't have gone along with it. Sam was so careful it was infuriating sometimes. Kias glanced down at Sam's sleeping form and sighed, then went to the window. Outside, people were bustling down the road on their way to or from one place or another. Likely on their way home from wherever they worked, as it would be getting dark soon.

The one little niggling worry Kias did have about this whole new role was how blind Sam could be to certain things. Sam had spent so much time trying to see only the good in societies so that he could record their more positive aspects that he’d been left with some rather large gaps in his understanding of cultures like Kias'.

Kias understood Sam's position on the matter, but he didn't agree that the experiences of all but a few wealthy and powerful individuals should be erased for the sake of a pretty picture. Sam would see just how terrible those with the most power could be and, if Kias had a bit of fun in showing him, that was good too.

#

When Sam woke up his head no longer felt like a war zone. Although the chip provided him with a place to store new information, his own brain had to work out the connections to integrate it. With two extra languages muddling around in there, it had been an awful tangle. Sam wasn't sure he would have been able to sort them apart at all if he hadn't already gotten Kias' language fixed in his mind beforehand.

Kias was kneeling on the floor next to the bed, his back to Sam, moving around awkwardly, and Sam couldn't figure out what he was doing.

"Hey," Sam said, and Kias twisted around to look at him.

Kias gave Sam a lopsided smile. "One moment. I know how prudish you are."

Sam, unable to see Kias' lower half, still couldn't figure out what Kias was doing. Not until Kias stood, giving Sam an eyeful of bare ass, and then pulled up his pants and tossed the tube of scar lotion onto the bed. That was twice he'd seen Kias' naked buttocks in one day now. If it hadn’t made him feel so awkward, Sam would have considered himself lucky.

Kias turned and grinned at Sam, completely at ease. "We don't exactly have our own private bathroom here. I intended to protect your virgin eyes by doing it while you were asleep."

Sam aimed one of the cushions from the bed at Kias' head and missed. "Nothing about me is virginal."

"Nothing?" Kias smiled, his eyebrow quirking up challengingly. "I bet I could find something you're a virgin to. Plenty of things."

"Okay, challenged denied." Sam shoved at Kias with his foot as Kias crawled onto the bed, causing him to laugh.

"I'm huuungry," Kias whined, rolling onto his back. "There have been food smells coming from downstairs for ages. Delicious food smells."

Sam glanced at the window and saw that it was, indeed, full dark out, though he had no way of determining how late it was exactly without going outside and taking a look at the moon. Not so late that food had stopped being served, though, and Sam knew that was all Kias would care about.

"All right," Sam said, sitting up and combing his fingers through his hair to get it to fall back into place. He stretched and yawned. "Okay. Where's your pretty hair thing?"

Kias let Sam tie his hair back up in the ridiculous beaded silk ribbon. It had been quite expensive for something so pointless, but as they had virtually unlimited funds Sam had bought it anyway when the shopkeeper had offered it to him. Now that Sam's brain was a bit more ordered, he could see just how obvious a sign it had been to everyone that Kias was more to Sam than a regular servant. Oh well. What was done was done, and at least Kias seemed happy enough with the change in role. Sam wasn't sure he was.

Sam led Kias out of the room, following the scent of roasting meat. The stairs led down to a room with a fireplace and an arrangement of lounges and padded chairs. At one end of the room there was a door leading back out to the front desk, and at the other was a door leading through to the tavern, from which the smell of cooking meat emanated.

As they reached the base of the stairs, a man smiled up at them from where he was reading on one of the generously padded lounges. A boy no more than fourteen leant against him, a book of his own open in his hands. The boy glanced up at them for a moment, assessed them impassively, then returned to reading.

The man, on the other hand, was still smiling at them, and Sam felt compelled to stop and speak to him.

"Hello!" the man said cheerily as he sat up. The boy gave an annoyed huff as his back support was removed.

"Hello," Sam greeted with a friendly smile, pulling himself into character. "We were just going to get something to eat. Do you know if they have anything good here?"

"The wine is good," the man said, then gestured to the couch across from himself and the boy. "Won't you sit with us a while first, though?"

"Certainly." Sam shot Kias an apologetic smile before leading him over to the couch. "I'm Samuel," Sam said, then poked Kias in the shoulder, "and this is Kias."

"Samuel," the man repeated, pronouncing it sam-you-ell. Sam didn't correct him. He only ever used his extended name for assignments, so he didn't really care. "I'm Kalem," the man said, patting his chest. He wrapped an arm around the boy, who grunted disapprovingly when he almost dropped his book. "This is Seba."

Sam wasn't sure what Kalem's relationship was with Seba, but they didn't appear to be related. Seba had long, straight black hair and skin that was pale with a bronze undertone. His eyes were dark and strongly narrowed at the outside edges, his cheekbones were high, and the bridge of his nose was flatter than average.

Comparatively, Kalem had features far more similar to Kias' than Seba's. His short hair was a mousy blond colour, his skin was fair — though not as light as Kias' — and he had prominent cheekbones and a long, pointed nose. Sam's best guess at his age was somewhere around thirty — not nearly old enough to be Seba's father.

It would also have been quite an age difference for brothers, and the difference in physical appearances would have meant they could only have been half brothers. There were countless other options for familial relations, such as being cousins, or Kalem being Seba's adoptive father, but Sam was trying his best to be less naive, and could think of more unsettling explanations for their intimate behaviour. Sam hoped those guesses were wrong.

"Given your unusual accent and that I haven't seen you around before, I take it you're not from here." Kalem was still smiling, and it was starting to unnerve Sam. "But I simply cannot place your accent. Where are you from?"

Sam decided he might as well give Kalem his full story. It was one he'd used for many assignments before, modified only slightly to fit the particular circumstances of this assignment. "My father is a merchant, so I've travelled all my life. I can't say I'm from any singular place, and my accent is a combination of many. We've never travelled quite this far out before, however. My father has sent me here to look into trade opportunities."

It felt like reciting a rehearsed speech, probably because it was one. He hoped Kalem didn't ask where he'd never travelled this far out from, because without even a basic knowledge of a world's geography that was pretty damn hard to answer. In the past, he'd just always said north and hoped that actually made sense.

If his story was odd or poorly delivered, though, Kalem was polite enough not to comment. Or perhaps simply drunk enough not to notice. He seemed a little tipsy. "Oh, you've never travelled here before? Perhaps I could show you around." Sam noted that Kalem had said I, not we, despite the fact that he and Seba were obviously very close. Either Seba would not be involved, or Kalem didn't think his involvement warranted a mention.

Sam inclined his head in a way he hoped translated as an expression of thanks in Kalem's culture. "We'd like that."

#

Kias had been paying attention when the man had introduced himself and his boy, and Kias was pretty sure the man was named Kalem and the boy was called Seba. While Sam talked to Kalem, Kias watched Seba.

He looked healthy, Kias was glad to see, and more perpetually annoyed than scared or submissive. Seba had his book open and was staring at the pages, turning them occasionally, but Kias was fairly sure he was listening to the conversation between Sam and Kalem rather than reading. Every now and then Seba would shoot Kias a look of irritation. Clearly he wished Kias would focus his attention elsewhere.

Sam glanced at Kias before saying something to Kalem, and then stood up, pulling Kias with him. It looked like Kalem and Seba were getting up too, so Kias surmised that they had made plans to eat together. Kias hoped that was the plan, anyway. He was hungry. Seba kept his thumb wedged between the pages of his book to save his place.

They did indeed head into the tavern in the next room. Sam indicated for Kias to sit and murmured, "Wait here," in his ear. Kalem prodded Seba into the chair next to Kias before heading towards the bar with Sam, presumably to order them food. Seba immediately started reading again, refusing to acknowledge Kias’ presence.

Kias sighed deeply and leant back in his chair. Sam actually looked like he was getting along with Kalem, although as Kias had never seen Sam in a role before he couldn't say how much of it was an act. He hoped it all was. Seba seemed more like a spoiled pet than anything, but Kias had known boys like him. He'd lived with them. Often, they were just the ones who were best at hiding things.

#

"Your boy—" Kalem began as they sat back down at the table, ignoring the fact that Sam's 'boy' was right there.

"Kias," Sam corrected. He gave Kias a little smile from across the table, but Kias' own expression remained impassive.

"Yes, Kias." Kalem's arm brushed Sam's when he reached for his cup. "He's quite old, isn't he?"

That was one hell of a loaded question, the social nuances of which Sam really didn't feel like getting into. "I'm older."

"Yes, but hardly by much," Kalem pressed. He was relaxed, though, and when Sam leant back in his chair to look at him Kalem smiled just as readily as before.

"I have no interest in the company of children." Sam was pretty sure he succeeded in keeping the accusatory tone out of his voice. It occurred to Sam a moment later that in some cultures intimacy with those whose genitals matched your own was only acceptable when your partner hadn't yet developed pubic hair. But fuck it. He was already pretending to be someone who essentially kept a sex slave. He wasn't going to pretend he was down with fucking kids.

Kalem took a long drag of his wine, licking his lips almost sensually afterwards. "It can't be easy keeping a boy his age in line, though."

"I find that if you give people the respect they deserve, they will give you the respect you deserve in turn." What Sam didn't say was that the respect someone expected and the respect they deserved were not the same thing.

"I suppose I can understand the appeal of someone a bit more... mature." Kalem quirked a smile at Sam. "Boys Seba's age can be so difficult."

Sam was fairly sure he was being hit on. He was fairly sure he had been for a while now. Kalem was good looking and all, but Sam made a point of not getting sexually or romantically involved with anyone on assignments.

Or with child molesters, ever.

"Teenagers are like that." Sam found Kias' leg under the table a poked it with his shoe. When Kias looked up at Sam from where he was de-shelling nuts on the table and gave him a questioning look, Sam stole his nut while he was distracted.

"Do you find he's more durable because of his age?" Kalem asked, and Sam couldn't stop himself from making a face at that one. Was Kalem always so blunt, or was he drunker than Sam realised? That would explain all the smiley friendliness.

"I don't have any point of comparison," Sam said finally, when he thought he could speak again without losing his calm. "As I said, I have no interest in children."

"Ah, yes, of course." Kalem emptied his cup. "I'm sorry. I'm being quite forward, aren't I?"

“A little, yes.”

Sam smiled at Kias and brushed his foot against Kias' under the table. Kias scowled at him and placed a defensive hand over his new nut, but after a moment he gave Sam a cheeky grin.

Sam was relieved when their food arrived, as it gave him an excuse to stop talking to Kalem. Sam was really beginning to hate this role. Now, it seemed he was going to be a magnet for 'fellow' sex slavers.

After a while Kalem wandered off, more noticeably drunk now, to talk to someone else he recognised. Sam was glad. He hoped by morning Kalem would no longer remember Sam had agreed to let him show him around.

"He's not always like that." Seba had tilted his book down towards his chest and was looking at Sam. "He can just be a... He can be like that, when he's drunk."

This was the first Sam had heard Seba speak. His voice was soft, and each word he spoke seemed to be carefully articulated.

"If a man cannot control his behaviour when he's drunk," said Sam, "then perhaps he shouldn't drink."

Seba winced. "Of course," he said, and then as he stood to find his master, "Excuse me."

"Yay, making friends," Sam murmured to Kias once they were alone at the table.

"Friends for life, I'm sure," Kias said between mouthfuls of food.

"Well, probably for the rest of their lives." Sam bit into a bread roll and mulled over what he'd just said while he chewed. "Wow, that was in really poor taste."

Something thumped against the chair beside Sam, and Sam looked over to see a tall woman in shabby guard's armour. She grinned at him. "Can I sit with you?"

Sam was pretty sure that if he were to play his role strictly, his answer ought to be 'no' simply because of the woman's obviously low social status. However, as her ass in the seat meant Kalem's couldn't be, Sam gave her a small nod.

"Ah, thanks!" she said, beaming, and took a seat next to Sam. "Now, what do you know about cards?"

#

Kias wasn't even sure Sam understood the rules of the card game he kept losing at. What he was fairly sure of was that this lady was trying to hustle Sam. Kias didn’t know if it counted as succeeding if Sam simply didn't even care about losing all his coin.

Sam tapped Kias' foot under the table. "Go get me a handful of the copper coins from the bag upstairs?"

Kias was glad to have the opportunity to do something and gave Sam a curt nod before standing. Sitting around and watching things without being able to get involved in or understand conversation had been getting awkward.

It was starting to get late, and Kias was starting to get tired. He hadn't had a nap when Sam had. Most of the tavern’s occupants had gone to bed, and the rest had settled down to quiet talking. By the time Kias rounded the corner into the lounge, not much sound could be heard coming from the tavern.

Kalem looked up from where he was seated on the couch as Kias entered the room, giving Kias a lecherous smile. Seba kneeled on the floor in front of Kalem, his mouth too occupied for smiles of any kind.

For a moment Kias felt legitimately afraid, though he couldn't say why. Kalem picked up on it, though. When he took a firmer grip on the back of Seba's head and thrust forward into his mouth, hard, causing the boy to choke, Kias knew it was for him. After fear, though, came rage.

Kias wanted to kill Kalem. He wanted to, and he was pretty sure he could. He was pretty sure that if he let his anger take over he would be entirely capable of taking a man's life. If he let his anger rule him.

Instead Kias bit down on the inside of his cheek, turned away, and walked up the stairs. He would not fail this assignment, fail Sam, because he was unable to control his temper.

#

It was five minutes before Sam noticed Kias had been gone longer than necessarily, ten before he started to worry, and fifteen before he abandoned his new gambling buddy to go find Kias.

He found Kalem first.

Kalem was sitting on the couch, Seba lying next to him with his head in Kalem's lap while Kalem ran fingers through Seba's long, slightly mussed hair. It looked like Kalem had finally managed to get Seba to abandon his book, as it was lying open on the floor. Sam tried to make his smile look at least vaguely sincere when Kalem noticed him.

"I'm just looking for Kias," Sam explained, hoping that excuse would be good enough to keep Kalem from holding him up.

"Oh, we saw him go upstairs just a moment ago!" His fingers snagged in Seba's hair, pulling at a knot. "Won't you sit with us while you wait?"

"...Of course."

Sam believed Kalem when he'd said Kias had gone upstairs, which meant his safety likely wasn't under question. Sam suspected Kias was simply hiding up there because he didn't want to have to walk past Kalem again, mostly because that was exactly what Sam would have done in his position. Sam hoped Kias would stay upstairs so that he could pursue him up there and leave Kalem behind.

Sam was out of luck, though. Just as he was attempting to extract himself from a conversation about the silk trade, something Sam knew nothing about, Kias re-emerged from upstairs.

#

Kias headed tentatively downstairs, seeking out the comfort of Sam's presence. It was unfortunate that it would have to come at the price of spending time around Kalem. Kias shot Kalem a glare as he walked past, making no attempt to disguise his anger and disgust. When Kias looked at Sam, though, he kept his expression carefully neutral.

As soon as Kias sat down next to Sam on the couch, Sam pulled Kias to him and held him tight against his side. Kias let out a long sigh and did his best to force himself to relax. As Sam talked to Kalem, carefully stiff and polite, he rubbed his fingers against Kias' neck and shoulders until Kias was slumped against him bonelessly. Kias kept his face buried against Sam's arm, letting himself pretend that they were alone despite the conversation going on around him.

He was tired. He wanted to go upstairs. Kias pulled away from Sam slightly, drawing his attention. Sam's smile, which had been forced and polite, melted into something soft and genuine when he looked at Kias. Sam's hand was still on the back of Kias' neck, and after a moment it trailed forward, across Kias' throat, and tipped Kias chin up. Sam pressed their lips together, warm and intimate. For a moment it was okay. And then Kalem laughed.

Whatever comment Kalem made after that, after Kias had abruptly pulled away, Kias didn't understand. Kias was angry. He was furious and he wanted to hurt someone. Instead, his fisted his hand's in Sam's shirt, knuckles white, and gritted his teeth. A few moments later Sam was urging Kias to his feet and directing him up the stairs.

"Sorry about that," Sam said after the door to their room had been shut and locked. "You okay now?"

"No!" Kias shouted, ignoring the voice in the back of his mind that told him he ought to censor himself. "I'm not okay. It's not okay!"

"All right..." Sam said slowly, cautiously. "I don't understand why you're so upset. You're going to have to fill me in."

"You kissed me!"

Sam paused, frowning in thought. "I'm sorry? I didn't know that was against the rules."

"You kissed me, our first real kiss, in front of that asshole!" Kias pulled the tie out of his hair and tossed it to the floor angrily. It was the most destructive thing he could do without actually destroying anything.

Sam let out a long sigh, his shoulders slumping. "I'm sorry. I didn't really think of that, I just... I mean, it wasn't a show for him. He just happened to be there."

Kias folded his arms across his chest defensively, but some of his anger was defusing. "Anything new, anything we haven't done before, we do alone, with privacy, first. Understand?"

Sam nodded, holding his hands up in surrender. "Understood." He scratched the back of his neck, hesitated. "I could make it up to you?"

"How?"

Sam stepped closer until he was in Kias' personal space, until Kias could smell Sam with every intake of breath. "Do over?"

Kias didn't respond with words, just shuffled closer until these chests touched with every inhale. He tilted his head up, an invitation. Sam took it.

Sam's lips moved slowly against Kias’ at first, gentle and hesitant, but his enthusiasm grew as Kias responded with fervour. He urged Kias back the couple of steps needed to push him against the wall, using the support to press more closely against Kias. For a moment, Kias liked it. He liked Sam's body firm against his own, he liked the friction between them as Sam moved against him, providing stimulation to a growing need.

And then he didn't. Suddenly he was afraid and he was trapped, and he was pressed against the wall and Sam was bigger than him, and stronger. He felt like he was suffocating, though in truth Sam’s body wasn’t pressed against his with anywhere near enough force to do much to constrict his breathing. He tried to fight his brain, to push away the fear with logic, but the longer he was trapped, the more he began to panic. It was only a few seconds before Sam stepped away, giving him room, but it felt far longer.

Kias slid down the wall and sat on the floor, arms folded on top of his knees and head buried in them. He was okay. He was fine. This was stupid. He wasn't afraid of Sam! This was ridiculous, Sam would never hurt him. He knew that.

Sam knelt down cautiously on the floor in front of Kias. "Kias..."

"Shut up," Kias said, shooting Sam a glare over his folded arms. "Don't even... Just shut up."

Now that the fear was fading, all that was left was shame. After all he'd told Sam about what a big boy he was, how he could deal with sex just fine despite all that had happened to him, he'd gone and freaked out the moment things had started getting heated. Fucking brilliant.

And it was completely stupid! He'd had sex without issue with the other boys in the house when nobody had been looking, and he'd enjoyed it just fine! Of course, the circumstances there had been different. Most of those boys had been smaller than him, younger than him, and certainly more submissive than him. Kias had been the one pushing people against things, holding them down.

Not that he'd received many complaints. On a couple of occasions the boys had freaked out like Kias just had, despite their initial willingness. Usually, though, they were just happy to be touched in a way that felt nice.

"Ugh." Kias rubbed his eye, looking up at Sam. "This is stupid."

"You've been through a traumatic event and something reminded you of that so you got scared. It makes sense."

Kais frowned in annoyance. "No it doesn't. I am not scared of you."

Sam sighed and shook his head. "It doesn't work like that, unfortunately. You can't logic it away. I kind of... well, I expected this to happen, eventually. I just didn't know what would trigger you."

When Kias didn't seem inclined to respond, Sam continued. "I've been through the same thing, though for different reasons. I wasn't born on the world I call home now, you know." Sam flopped back so he was seated properly on the floor. "My world was destroyed, like yours, when I was a kid."

That got Kias' interest. "So someone saved you like you saved me?"

"Not exactly." Sam rubbed idly at his chin. "My world was a colony of the one I live on now, so there was an official rescue effort for the few survivors. I used to run away all the time, go climb the rocky hills and play in the trees on top. I happened to be up there, skipping my lessons, the day of the attack. That was the only reason I survived. I was nine."

Kias listened, wide eyed.

"When I was first taken to the main world, I was a mess. Loud noises, machinery, freaked me out. I was scared of the dark, I had nightmares. And I was so, so angry. I was angry that I was safe but the fear wouldn't leave me. I felt guilty because I'd survived, that I'd stayed and hid, while everyone else had died.

"But," Sam said, "I had people to talk to about it. Actual professional people who were paid to know about these things and about how to deal with them. I can't offer you that, and I'm sorry."

Kias was quiet for a long time as he processed Sam's story. "We're going to try this again."

Sam gave Kias a nervous look. "Maybe that's not a great idea. We could try another time?"

"No," Kias said firmly. "I need to." Kias crawled closer to Sam and poked him in the chest. "We just need to do things a little differently."

Sam paused in consideration for a few moments, then nodded. "Tell me what you need."

"Okay, put your legs out in front of you like this." Kias sat beside Sam with his legs pressed together in a straight line in front of him. Sam mimicked his position. "Good," Kias said, then crawled onto Sam's lap and straddled his thighs.

This was far more within Kias' comfort zone. Sam was still bigger than him, stronger than him. He could still overpower Kias if he wanted to. But when he was like this... well, it at least let Kias feel like he had the power.

Kias looked down at Sam, finding both concern and desire in Sam's eyes. Kias ground himself forward, rolling his his hips to cause friction just where they needed it. It felt good, so Kias did it again as he pressed his lips to Sam's. As they kissed, Sam's hand drifted to Kias' ass, giving it a tentative squeeze, then gripped it more firmly when Kias' responded by grinding himself against Sam with renewed vigour. Kias' pants were quickly going from snug to much too tight.

Kias pulled away for a moment, pushing himself back so he had space to untie the string keeping his pants tied up and currently digging into his dick. He could do without it doing either of those things.

Kias had to stand to remove his pants, one leg on either side of Sam's thighs as he pushed down the tight fabric. Sam unconsciously licked his lips when Kias' erection sprang free, standing tall a hand span away from Sam's face.

Sam swallowed. "Do you want me to...?"

Kias considered for a moment, but decided Sam's soft pink lips looked too good not to taste again. Kias kicked off his pants before sinking down again to straddle Sam's thighs.

"Okay, that's good too." Sam started unbuttoning his shirt. "Gimme a minute. I like this shirt."

Once Sam’s shirt was removed, Kias was left with the bare expanse of beautiful skin that was Sam's chest. He scooted forward, pressing himself against Sam's stomach, shifting against him. The drag and rub of bare skin against Kias’ cock made Kias shake with need. He found Sam's mouth again and kissed him roughly.

With each downward stroke against Sam's stomach, Kias' could feel Sam's own hardness pushing against the confines of Sam's pants. Sam's hips jolted slightly each time Kias' sank back into his lap, but Sam made no attempt to gain more stimulation or to free his straining erection.

Kias broke the kiss and wrapped his arms around Sam's neck, his head dropping to breathe heavily against Sam's ear. His movements were desperate, instinctive, no longer under his conscious control and fuelled by a growing need. Sam lifted the bottom of Kias' shirt up, out of the way, moments before Kias found his release. Kias was used to keeping quiet, but he couldn't help letting out a muffled cry as his body pulsed with pleasure.

Kias flopped down on the floor beside Sam, panting and spent.

"Hmm," said Sam after a few moments, and Kias looked over at him. Sam had leant back, propping himself on his elbows, and was staring at the mess Kias had made on his chest. "You know, I didn't really consider how we were going to clean this up."

Kias hummed and poked a finger into one of the milky streaks, drawing a spiral with the fluid.

Sam laughed. "We don't really need four pillows, do we? We only have two heads between us." Sam let himself fall fully onto his back, and reached up to stroke a hand over Kias' hair. "Do you think they'd kick us out if we used one of their pillow cases to mop up semen?"

Kias grinned and forced his tired body to stand. "If they do, it'll be worth it."

The pillowcases were made of fine, embroidered cotton, and were so excessive that Kias felt a tiny thrill as he wiped Sam's chest clean, likely permanently staining the fabric.

"Do you want me to do something..." Kias asked, eyeing the slowly shrinking bulge in Sam's pants. "You know, for you."

Sam sat up and pulled Kias close, planting a kiss on his forehead. "Next time. I think we're both a bit tired tonight."

Kias made a vague sound of agreement. He'd seen Sam naked and he'd really like to know what Sam looked like hard and needy, but he was very tired. He felt kind of bad for getting off and not granting Sam any release, but Kias would prefer to take his time with things when he had time and energy to spare.