Panophobia

“Yo, Jack, Alex! You guys know how to throw a good party.”

They tossed smiles in my direction, Alex raising his glass as they spun away from me, smaller girls leading them to the dance floor. I chuckled, taking a sip of my beer in his honor of most likely getting laid tonight. Whether he was banging the girl, or being banged by Jack, was something I’ll never know.

A made my way through the house, the sound of Blink182 blaring in my ears. Groups of drunk kids were lined up, basically dry humping others for a camera. What a classy pose. I walked passed them, probably photo bombing, when I finally found my friends, Jesse and Gabe.

“Hey, where’s Justin?” I asked. He was mine and my sister’s ride home.

“Dude, his mom called him up, hella pissed off,” Jesse slurred.

“Yeah, he had to go home, like, thirty minutes ago,” Gabe piped in.

“Great,” I said sarcastically, taking another sip.

“Just party it up, dude. It’s not every day your friends’ band releases an album,” Gabe countered.

“Yeah, I know.”

See, my friends Alex, Rian, Zack, and Jack just released their first album appropriately called The Party Scene. That’s a big accomplishment, seeing that we’re only teenagers.

“Hey, Kailey is talkin’ to Parker over there,” Jesse said, smirk slapped on his face, pointing across the room.

I felt anger bubble inside of me. Parker is a senior, she’s only a sophomore.

“Hold this,” I said, pushing my drink into Gabe’s chest.

I made my way over to them, seeing my sister twirl her hair and his hand on her upper arm. Ugh! He obviously got her wasted. If my parents see her like that then I’m the one who’s gonna be in trouble!

“Hey,” I said, grabbing the wine cooler bottle out of Kailey’s hand, “we got to go now.”

“Now?” she said, clearly drunk, elongating the one syllable word.

“Yes, now,” I said through gritted teeth.

She sighed, leaning in and whispering something into Parker’s ear while I glared at him. They giggled together and he gave her a sloppy kiss on the nose. Disgusting.

I pulled her arm and started dragging her through the house, bumping into drunken bodies trying to dance.

As we got through the front door, anger was radiating off of me.

“How could you be so stupid?!” I yelled, throwing her arm down, and turning to face her, my own arms waving in the air. “You know his hobby is stealing V-cards!”

“God, Kellin, would you loosen up a bit? I’m turning sixteen soon. Sixteen!”

“Does is look like I give a shit?” I said, turning away from her and stomping down the side walk.

“Hey, where’s Justin?” she asked, finally noticing we weren’t in a fucking car.

“He got in trouble. Let’s take the shortcut.”

We continued to walk down the sidewalk until we reached the small woods area. This was where we used to play with our friends as little children. It led from our neighborhood to Alex and Gabe’s. Once in a while I would take a walk here, but it was usually used to get me from a party to my house.

“I’ll race ya’!” Kailey shouted, running ahead of me. She always knows how to get the little kid side of me out; she did it so I just couldn't stay mad at her.

“Hey, no fair! You get a head start!” I yelled, starting to sprint to catch up.

We started going in circles, throwing our heads back in laughter. Kailey ran ahead again, towards our house and I pressed on.

Until I heard her scream.

“Kellin!” I heard the shriek. “Help me! Someone grabbed me! Kellin!”

I automatically kicked up my speed, but I was soon stopped by an arm reaching out and grabbing a fistful of my sweater. Another hand clamped over my mouth, and I was being pulled to the person. I let out a scream too, but it was muffled. My chest met theirs, and I was trying to push away until I realized that something about this person’s touch was… hypnotic.

It felt like laying in a hot bath after being left in the freezing cold.

It felt like being wrapped in the aroma of a bakery after a hard day at school.

It felt like your eyes slipping closed after staying up all night.

It felt like the fur of a cuddly kitten, licking your fingers and pressing its wet nose to yours.

It felt like lazy Saturday mornings, eating breakfast and watching a rerun of your favorite show.

It felt like the touch was made only for me to feel.

“Shh, don’t talk,” a voice whispered to me; the voice of the one holding me. A man’s voice. “It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay. Just don’t listen to them, okay? Just listen to me.”

For some reason I felt compelled to listen to him, and not talk or move. I felt like everything he was saying to me was the God’s honest truth. Like he couldn’t lie to me even if he tried.

I started to struggle out of his grasp when I heard my sister scream, “Don’t touch me there!” but he instantly calmed me again when said, “Just feel my touch.”

I felt myself melting into him, as his hand slow ran a trail up and down my back. I tuned out the screams from my sister, and the grunts of whoever had grabbed her. Tears were slipping out of my eyes and laid my head on his shoulder, my face in the crook of his neck and I softly sobbed.

He cooed words of comfort in my ear, transitioning into telling me fairy tales, humming little tunes every once in a while, until everything stopped, and all I could register was him and his touch.

“I’m going to take you home now,” he said softly, brushing my bangs out of my eyes. I nodded, draping my arms around his neck.

He picked me up, bridal style, and I could barely catch a glimpse of his face before sleep washed over me.