The Girl Next Door
Chapter 32
My mind went blank for a moment. My knees got weak and my stomach was victimized by a thousand butterflies. Was this really happening? Harry's hand making its way ever so softly against my cheek before settling on my neck brought me back to reality.
"What are you doing?!" I asked frantically and slightly out of breathe as I pushed him back, realizing that this kiss probably didn't mean half as much to him as it did to me, and there was no way in hell I'd be just another notch in Harry Style's belt.
"Running a marathon, obviously." Harry said, also out of breathe.
"Why'd you kiss me?" I asked in an accusing tone.
"I...I just"
"You can't do that, Harry! It's not fair to me!" I screamed, thrown aback by my own outburst as I took a few steps back. Harry's eyes went from guilty to angry in less than a second.
"Not fair to you? Do you have any idea what 'not fair' is?" He said, taking a step so he was a few inches from my face. "'Not fair' is when you watch the girl you're hopelessly in love with fall in love someone else! 'Not fair' is when the simple thought of her brings an immense joy to your heart, yet you know there's just pure disgust in her mind when she- and if she ever - thinks of you!" He screams. "And 'not fair' is when you know that you'll never be good enough for her, and yet you still devote the majority of your time to her because even though you don't deserve it, she does." He says a little more softly.
"You...you" I stutter.
"Yeah." He said.
"But...you're always so mean." I cried and that made him chuckle.
"Can you blame me? I mean first of all, you've met my dad. Well, the version I always get anyway. And how else am I supposed to cope with the fact that I'll never get you." He admitted and I don't know if it was the cold or the situation but I started shaking. Harry noticed and he took his jacket off, putting it on my shoulder. I looked down on it. It was warm. It felt safe. Safer than Niall's bedroom. How could this happen?
"So what now?" I whispered, my eyes on the ground. I couldn't bring myself to look up. Because if I found him with a smirk, then that would mean he's joking, and I don't think my heart could handle that.
"Ball's in your court now, Williams." He muttered and I let out a breathe I hadn't realized I'd been holding.
"This is just so much." I said and he shushed me softly.
"I know and I'm sorry for dumping all of this on you I just...I couldn't hide it anymore."
"How long?"
"Longer than I can remember." He said and I nodded once. We were at safe distance. Enough for me to think straight.
I didn't really get a chance to, though.
"Guys?"
"What are you doing?!" I asked frantically and slightly out of breathe as I pushed him back, realizing that this kiss probably didn't mean half as much to him as it did to me, and there was no way in hell I'd be just another notch in Harry Style's belt.
"Running a marathon, obviously." Harry said, also out of breathe.
"Why'd you kiss me?" I asked in an accusing tone.
"I...I just"
"You can't do that, Harry! It's not fair to me!" I screamed, thrown aback by my own outburst as I took a few steps back. Harry's eyes went from guilty to angry in less than a second.
"Not fair to you? Do you have any idea what 'not fair' is?" He said, taking a step so he was a few inches from my face. "'Not fair' is when you watch the girl you're hopelessly in love with fall in love someone else! 'Not fair' is when the simple thought of her brings an immense joy to your heart, yet you know there's just pure disgust in her mind when she- and if she ever - thinks of you!" He screams. "And 'not fair' is when you know that you'll never be good enough for her, and yet you still devote the majority of your time to her because even though you don't deserve it, she does." He says a little more softly.
"You...you" I stutter.
"Yeah." He said.
"But...you're always so mean." I cried and that made him chuckle.
"Can you blame me? I mean first of all, you've met my dad. Well, the version I always get anyway. And how else am I supposed to cope with the fact that I'll never get you." He admitted and I don't know if it was the cold or the situation but I started shaking. Harry noticed and he took his jacket off, putting it on my shoulder. I looked down on it. It was warm. It felt safe. Safer than Niall's bedroom. How could this happen?
"So what now?" I whispered, my eyes on the ground. I couldn't bring myself to look up. Because if I found him with a smirk, then that would mean he's joking, and I don't think my heart could handle that.
"Ball's in your court now, Williams." He muttered and I let out a breathe I hadn't realized I'd been holding.
"This is just so much." I said and he shushed me softly.
"I know and I'm sorry for dumping all of this on you I just...I couldn't hide it anymore."
"How long?"
"Longer than I can remember." He said and I nodded once. We were at safe distance. Enough for me to think straight.
I didn't really get a chance to, though.
"Guys?"