Disarranged

"Harry's in the Department of Mysteries!" someone screamed, causing all of 12 Grimmauld Place to wake up. Mad-Eye quickly gathered a team.

"I'm coming too!" Sirius shouted. "You can't stop me from being there for my godson!" I was immediately at his side, staring down Alastor with all the resolution I could muster. He exclaimed we had no time for heroics and stupid pride, and that we could come if we didn't mind losing our heads.

We didn't waste time and quickly left. The only thing on our minds was to protect Harry and save the kids. All other unimportant sensory information was ignored.

We entered the room, finding Harry's hand outstretched toward Lucius Malfoy, Prophecy in hand. I could see Tonks' Auror-mode kick in as she sent a quick and effective Stunning Spell, and suddenly we all sprang into action.

I was zig-zagging to make myself a more difficult target as I sent my own spells out at the Death Eaters. There were a lot of them, and I was positive Lucille was somewhere among them.

I noted Harry being choked by a Death Eater, but I couldn't run over to help. Two Death Eaters were out for my blood. I quickly took in the room. Everyone had their hands full.

Luckily one of Harry's friends bravely stepped in. I would cast a Fiendfyre again, but having it indoors and in such close quarters could mean friendly fire and unneeded casualties.

I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins, my survival instincts kicking in. Everything seemed clear and and my spells flew fast and accurately. I cast a particularly strong Deprimo, knocking one of the Death Eaters to the stone floor. It was now one-on-one. I felt I was suddenly back in the short-lived Dueling Club at Hogwarts, except now there were no rules.

I deftly deflected the spells thrown at me, trying to redirect them at other Death Eaters if I could. I rattled off every potentially damaging spell I could imagine, but my foe was determined. I wondered if it was Lucille under the mask. The thought only increased my passion and anger.

I made a quick slashing motion with my wand, causing a cut to appear on my foe's shoulder. They seemed distracted by the pain so I took the moment to scan the room. Tonks was down and Sirius was running toward Bellatrix. I remembered seeing her image on the Black family tree.

Turning my full attention back to my enemy I found an opening. "Stupefy!" I yelled and they fell to the ground. I rejoined the general fray, trying to put myself between the kids and the Death Eaters. I was determined to fight until the bitter end, imagining my mother, father, and brother and their slumped lifeless figures. It only reminded me that these people were vile.

Suddenly I swore I heard someone exclaim, "Dumbledore!" and in my peripheral vision I saw the man himself. It was a huge relief knowing he had arrived. Most of the Death Eaters, including the one I was battling, scrambled like ants. Dumbledore rounded up most of them, and I joined in, happily casting spells to glue them in their places.

I thought it to be over, but I saw Sirius and Bellatrix still going at it, in their own world. I began to run over, ready to cast even an Unforgivable Curse to protect Sirius.

"Come on, you can do better than that!" Sirius taunted. He was totally out of control, I realized. He was blinded by rage and pure hatred. Bellatrix cackled, sending a spell his way. I felt my heart stop and I felt my body move on its own. I barely managed to grab Sirius by the scruff with one hand, preventing him from falling into the veil. With the other hand I waved my wand and I exclaimed, "INCENDIO!" as vengeful flames roared toward Bellatrix. She danced out of the way, cackling the whole time.

"I killed Sirius Black!" she chanted. I finally looked toward him. His eyes were closed and body limp. I racked my brain trying to remember what spell she had cast. It wasn't the Killing Curse--the light wasn't green.

I suddenly felt numb as Harry ran up screaming, "SIRIUS!" I had begun to gently stroke Sirius' hair.

"There's nothing you can do, Harry," Remus solemnly commented. Harry continued to scream. I was sure the loss was hard. I could understand losing your family, and then losing one thing that you discovered. I was vaguely aware that he set off to kill Bellatrix, her cackles echoing through the room and halls.

"I killed Sirius Black!"

Tonks had roused and was next to me now, her hand on my shoulder. I knew what I had signed up for, but I hadn't expect to lose him so soon. I opened my mouth but nothing came out.

"I know," Tonks reassured and squeezed my shoulder.

"I killed Sirius Black!"

I gently put Sirius on the ground and looked at his face. It was as if he were sleeping.

"I killed Sirius Black!"

I put my head on his chest, wishing I could be with him. I wished so hard that this was a nightmare and now I'd wake up in our bed. He'd laugh at me and make a joke to lighten the mood.

"I killed Sirius Black!"

I moved my head up onto the soft part of his button-down shirt. I closed my eyes and heard the hushed whispers behind me. I tried to imagine that he was just taking a nap.

"I killed Sirius Black!"

My eyes snapped open when I heard it: a heartbeat.

"He's alive!" I nearly screamed, causing the Order members around me to rush over and tend to his wounds.