My Own Loser

“Alright, are you sure you're ready for this?” I ask from inside the dressing room. Jack is standing right outside, waiting to approve or disapprove of my outfit. Jack groans and I try to think of something else than the way it sounded. I haven't had sex in a while and it's starting to get to me.

“Alex this isn't Project Runway, just show me.”

I look at my outfit in the mirror one last time. I'm wearing a tank top that has some stupid brand name on it and I have on red skinny jeans that have rips all down the legs. I would never wear this, it's just a show for Jack. Thinking that makes me think about giving Jack a show. As in stripping.

Fuck.

I take a few deep breaths and shake my head as if trying to shake the thought from my head even if it's extremely hot.

I turn around and open the door to the dressing room.

Jack looks up from texting someone. Probably some fucking whore. What?

“It's nice, Lex. You should get it.” He says, putting his phone in his pocket. I start to internally freak out. That's all he has to say?

Jack takes a step closer, so our bodies are almost pressed up against each other.

He doesn't say anything, he just reaches his hand out slightly to my lower thigh and drags it up, his hand dancing across my skin that's revealing through the ripped skinnies. I hold in a gasp and bite my lip. Fuck.

“I think you should get these pants.” he whispers. I can feel his pointer finger sliding in between the jeans and my upper thigh and I just want him to fucking kiss me. He starts moving his finger in circles on my thigh. I feel like I'm about to fucking take him into the dressing room stall and fuck him but he suddenly removes his finger and turns around, his back facing me all of a sudden.

I watch as his hand moves to his back pocket and takes out his phone.

“Hello?” he asks as he puts it to his ear.

“Oh, hey, Zack.”

“Lex and I are out shopping.”

“See, I told Lex that Jaime wouldn't make out with you; he likes Vic!”

“Aw, I'm sorry, I didn't know you liked him.”

“Alright, go work out and we'll see you at 7?”

“'Kay.”Jack says. He hangs up the phone and turns back around.

“We're going to have drinks with Zack at 7 and maybe those jeans'll help you pick up some sexy mother fucker.” Jack winks. I don't think he understands what he's doing. At all. He is not helping my situation of trying to just maintain our friendship.

When we get back to our apartment around 6:45ish (we went to go see We're The Millers), I run to my room like a teenage girl who doesn't want to be around her parents and just wants to be on tumblr 24/7.

I dump out all the bags of clothes I got and pick the jeans with the rips that Jack seemed to like so much, a black hoodie with just a white t-shirt underneath, some black DCs, and a red beanie.

I look in the mirror.

“Not bad, Gaskarth.”

I turn around and see Jack with a towel around his waist, leaning in my doorway. He's still wet from taking a shower and I almost can't handle this.

“Shut the fuck up. I'm gonna upload our video, then we can leave.”

“That gives me, like, two seconds to get dressed.” Jack says.

“Then you better hurry.”

He runs off to his room and I sit down at my computer and start uploading the video. I open another tab and go on twitter.

“I like how you're all cool with me liking boys” I tweet. I immediately get a tornado of responses that include:

“<3”

“i love your guys videos”

“aw youre cute awg”

“no problem”

“go kill yourself you fag”