Him

Do you ever wonder about how different things would be if you’d just met someone a little earlier or a little later than you did? I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. I’ve been thinking that maybe we met at the wrong time. Why couldn’t I have been there three years ago? Why couldn’t I have been the one in her place? Why couldn’t you have fallen in love with me first? I know that it’s hard to forget your first love; I still remember mine like it was yesterday, but I’ve moved past that. You insist you have but I know that you haven’t. She’s always gonna be there in the back of your mind because things didn’t end the way they should have and you’ll forever be struck with the thought of “what if?” Those two words will kill you. And maybe she was your first but I want to be your last. Maybe we met at the wrong time. Maybe if we didn’t know each other now, and didn’t meet until this time next year, things would be different. Or maybe they wouldn’t. Maybe you’re always gonna be stuck in the same place that you are now. She is toxic and the hold she has on you is one that I have absolutely no hope of breaking. But you want to know a secret? You’re still holding on, you just don’t realise it yet. She’s like a rock and you keep chipping off a little piece to hold onto. I can’t help but think that you will end up right back where you started; in her arms, because that is what is familiar. But if all those explorers way back when had been scared of the unknown than we wouldn’t even be here.