Brilliant Lies

I didn't exactly know how to comprehend the break up between Mike and I also not to mention he left me without a warning, he just up and left me for his ex husband Tj which of course I had to find out by logging onto Facebook. The moment I saw he tagged Tj in a status I knew my feeling was right, scrolling down some more on the newsfeed I found they were married again, my heart dropped into my stomach. I was at an unbelievable state of mind for awhile, like when someone's talking to fast and expects you to remember everything they were saying, but you only caught maybe two or three key words of the entire rant. I began to think my life was over, that I would never find someone like him again but after smoking half my pack of Marlboro menthals I started to get a clear mind and realized I could find someone closely related to how he treated me.

I set my phone down on the coffee table and curled up on Josh's huge brown couch, burying my face into the uncomfortable arm and silently started crying as the tv played a rerun of family guy. A few minutes passed and I decided to pick my phone up and text Mike, we were talking a few hours before I passed out from pure exhaustion from the previous drinking session with Brandon. Another few minutes passed and he hadn't texted me back I was growing anxious so I did what I usually do and texted Josh.

"Josh... I need you..." Was all the text said before I sent it, waiting fifteen minutes I grew even more anxious so I tagged him in a status on Facebook to see if he was there, bad idea. I unlocked the screen on my phone and huffed before sending another text.

"Josh..." Five minutes later, "Josh I need you please answer me..." I felt annoyed of myself.

A few minutes after I sent the text my phone vibrated making me pick it up quickly, silently hoping in the back of my mind that it wasn't Mike. I unlocked the screen seeing Josh's name and I smiled a little before opening the text.

"I'm here babe." That name, that pet name was the only thing to set me off and I started sobbing again.

"Michael dumped me..."
"Because we were together," I could practically hear the concern and confusion in his text.
"No because he loves Tj he never loved me.." I had the hugest urge to just snuggle up to his chest and cry, but I was stuck on my band managers couch.
"So he lied to you..."
"He lied to me..." By now my eyes were welled up with tears which made my eyes hurt because I was trying my hardest not to cry over the situation.
"Well he's a jack ass then for leading you on.."
"...."
"Don't worry about that ass anymore hun you'll find someone better."
I didn't want to sound like a whore, but I've had feelings for this man ever since the first time he kissed me, and we dated for almost seven months back in November of last year, "I already have..."
"Who?"
"But I already gave him up.. For an asshole.."
"That doesn't answer my question sweetheart," I don't think he caught on.
"It was you.." I cut it short, I didn't want to beat around the bush.

He didn't text back after that so after waiting for almost an hour I decided to go back on Facebook and see what the two were up to, Mike had tagged Tj in a status.

"I FUCKING KNEW IT," my insides turned before I tapped on the comments.

I scrolled down seeing what they had said about me and it made my stomach twist in the most unpleasant way, especially when I read Tj's comment.

"I knew he was a whore," my face heated up and my fingers trembled while the anger fired up inside me.

After a few comments I deleted them, and blocked Michael. I threw my phone against the wall gripping my black inky mess of hair and pulled my legs to my chest, screaming into my knees. Shaky sobs racked through my body as I gripped my hair harder screaming louder into my knees, I hated Mike, I hated him!

Finally calming down almost a half hour later I picked my phone up sighing at the damaged I caused and walked outside lighting up another cigarette. I breathed the toxins in blowing it slowly out my nose before sitting down on the musty hard wood deck, and stared at the darkening sky above me. I think this was meant to happen since the second our so called relationship happened, I should of known the risks of being in a relationship with him.