Secret Agent Man

Gerard didn’t feel comfortable with the morning sunlight soaking his room with a creamy hue, and he mentally cursed himself for not closing the curtains before collapsing onto his bed in a drunken state. He was awake now, the sun seeping through the thin spaces between his closed eyelids; he wasn’t going to get back to sleep knowing it was the next day already. But it didn’t mean he couldn’t try anyway.

He was welcomed with a sore head and rolled onto one side in an attempt to block the warm sunrays with his back. Unfortunately, it made no difference whatsoever; now there was a mirror reflecting the yellow, sparkling light onto his face. Luck was just not on his side this time.

What day was it again…? Friday? No. Last night was Friday. Gerard didn’t get drunk on weekdays that weren’t Fridays. It was Saturday then.

Gerard opened his eyes, and the force of the mirrored sunbeam shot into his field of vision, blinding him a little. He quickly spun over on his other side and fumbled for his cell phone lying upon various paperwork scraps and receipts. He blindly dialed a number before he squeezed his eyes closed again and sank his face into his pillow. It rang for several seconds until the person in question actually picked up; his voice was scratchy, which meant he must have just woken up as well.

“Hey Mikey.”

“Urgh.”

“Good morning to you too.” Gerard smirked into the pillow and began massaging his head in smooth motions. “Did I wake you up?”

“Yes. You did. I was hoping to sleep in this morning, you know, after drinking a few yesterday.” There was some movement and scuffling in the background before Mikey’s voice perked up again. “I’ve got a killer headache right now. Just so you know.”

“Whatever. Take some aspirin and you’ll be fine. Always works for me.” Gerard paused. “Hey, can I ask a favor of you?”

“Dare I ask?” Mikey responded glumly.

“Can you come by and feed my pets for a few days, starting tomorrow? And I’m almost out of coffee, so stop by the store and get some if you have the time. Not the cheap stuff though. You know what I like.”

Mikey breathed in before sighing heavily. “Can’t you do that yourself? Or better yet, don’t you have a butler or slave to do that sort of stuff?”

“You are my butler, Mikey.” Gerard paused for effect. “Please?”

“Jesus.” There was another intermission at Mikey’s end of the line, where there seemed to be the muffled thumping of someone walking down some stairs. It took a full minute for him to start talking again. “Fine. I was going out to get coffee this morning when I woke up anyway. I’ll drop by and give you yours, but I will not feed your pets.”

Gerard gave a soft smile. “Thank you.” He hung up the phone before Mikey could change his mind and slowly got out of bed. He grabbed his robe off the floor and put it on before heading downstairs to watch TV while waiting for his brother.

The ring of the doorbell interrupted a story about a string of missing person cases on the other side of the country. He stood and walked toward the door, sliding his sunglasses on as his usual precautionary habit. Darker skin never looked good on him anyway.

“Do you always have to wear the glasses?” Mikey asked in mild exasperation when his older brother answered the door. Gerard just smirked in victory as Mikey handed him a bag of whole-bean coffee.

“You know me too well,” he answered. A series of deep barks suddenly filled the air as a black Great Dane leapt forward and jumped right into Mikey, knocking him off the top stair and drooling all over the front of his shirt. “Leave him alone, Rex.” He grabbed the animal’s collar and tugged gently, and the dog stepped back to sit obediently by his side as Mikey pulled himself off the ground.

“The bird I can handle, but this monster is too much,” Mikey said with a glare. “Why did you name it Rex, anyway?”

“It seems to fit her personality, doesn’t it?” Gerard noted with a small laugh. Mikey rolled his eyes.

“Where are you going this time? You never even told me when you got back from…Canada or wherever.”

“Office hasn’t told me where I’m going yet,” he responded as he walked back inside to go make coffee. Rex ran inside after him, and Mikey hurriedly closed the door before following.

“Wait, so, you don’t know how long you’ll be gone?” he asked in disbelief. Gerard ignored this as he waited for the coffee to start percolating. “How much birdseed and newspaper do you think I have?!”

“And dog food, unless you want Rex eating that filthy feline of yours,” Gerard added. Mikey sighed.

“Get someone else to handle the dog. Better yet, get an automatic feeder or something for it. They have those now, y’know.”

“She can’t operate the microwave, and if she doesn’t get a hot meal she gets upset.”

“She’ll live,” Mikey said with a glare. “Alicia and I don’t have the room anyway.”

“Haven’t seen her in a long time,” Gerard noted. “How is she?”

“Not bad. Little Mikey’s driving her crazy, but I think he’ll be a better once he turns three,” Mikey replied with a sigh.

“They call it the ‘terrible twos’ for a reason, genius,” his older brother said with a smile. Finally, Gerard was able to pour himself a cup of coffee. He opened a frosted glass cabinet to retrieve a bottle of bourbon and poured a shot of it into the mug before downing a third of it in one swallow. Mikey winced in disgust when he saw this.

“You and your habits,” he muttered. Gerard rolled his eyes.

“Come on, Mike. All I ask is that you feed and walk her once a day and make sure she doesn’t bite a hole out of the couch. Is that too much to ask?”

“But every time I’m over here, you make me sleep on the couch.” Mikey pouted. “It’s not fair. You live in a huge mansion and you won’t even let me borrow one room for a few days.”

“I’m not saying you have to stay here, alright? Just stop by in the morning and check up on her at night. I’ll even pay you.” Gerard had to make sure Mikey wouldn’t go in any of the house’s extra rooms. They were full of weapons and other equipment that he couldn’t risk anyone finding, not even his younger brother.

“…Fine. But just this once.” Gerard took a slower sip of his coffee, then walked over to a nearby desk and grabbed a sheet of paper and a pen to write down everything Mikey needed to know. The younger man started getting a little anxious once he had to flip the sheet over and continue on the back.

After Mikey left, Gerard went upstairs to get dressed before heading back to his car. He had spent the majority of the day sleeping; it was already past noon. He wore his usual attire, consisting of a black suit and tie with a white shirt for contrast. Simple, but just enough that he would be recognized…but only by those who needed to recognize him, of course.

He stepped into the car just a few minutes later and began to drive. While he wasn’t looking forward to the two-hour drive, he couldn’t risk waiting another day to make the trip. If he were late reporting to headquarters, they would send a team to find out what had happened to him. And if it turned out to be a waste of resources, he would be the one to pay for it.