The Day You Fell Apart

I woke up the next morning very slowly, to the point where I didn’t even open my eyes until it was necessary. But once I did, I finally realized that I was in a slightly dark room, in a bed that wasn’t mine, next to a boy.

I widened my eyes and suddenly last night’s events flashed in my head. Jonah threw up like three times in a row and I was pretty much just standing there, disgusted. But I couldn’t really leave Jonah like that, so I asked Dee if I could borrow her car and drive Jonah home. She told me that she’d get a ride back with Brad, so it was alright if I did. But my plans were suddenly vetoed when Jonah could barely even walk. It was crazy, all I had seen him drink were beers, but I guess he had hard alcohol before he even showed up to the bonfire. How stupid.

So, I had to get out of the car, grab Jonah, and help him walk to his house. Keep in mind that he is 8 inches taller than me, and ten times stronger than me. So let’s just say that it wasn’t an easy task.

Once we finally made it inside, he collapsed on his bed while I stood there, literally exhausted. Jonah kind of begged me to stay with him, and I just nodded, went to get him a glass of water and came back to sit at the end of his bed. I was planning to leave in about twenty minutes to go back to Dee’s and spend the night, and have him fend for himself in the morning, but I guess I ended up falling asleep.

I looked over at Jonah who was sleeping somewhat peacefully. I tried pushing some of his hair out of his face, but it just fell back into place again.

I began to study his features and soon realized that Jonah wasn’t so strong looking after all. He had a somewhat feminine face, but not too much of one. He had smooth skin, and although his nose was very boyish, his lips were very delicate looking. I smiled at his angelic appearance, knowing that he’d probably be super creeped out if he were to know that I was intensely staring at him right now.

Everyone always looks so much more peaceful and innocent when they sleep. They always look like they can do no wrong. When I looked down at Jonah, I didn’t see someone who was completely hammered and sloppy less than six hours ago, I saw someone who was… beautiful.

I converted my attention towards the floor of his room where my purse lay. I basically had two choices. I could either stay until he wakes up, or I can grab my purse, leave, and have him take care of himself. Both of which I didn’t necessarily want to do.

But before I could even decide, I heard a quiet grunt and felt the bed shift slightly. I looked over to see Jonah staring at me carefully. I stared back while silence overtook us for a minute.

“Why are you in my room?” He finally asked. I sat up and moved towards the end of his bed.

“You were really drunk and I took you home, and I accidentally fell asleep,” I replied. Jonah nodded slowly before sitting up himself and scooting towards me. I instantly stood up and stuffed my hands in my jean pockets.

“I’m not going to kill you,” Jonah stated. I let out a very small laugh which actually sounded more like a squeak and Jonah just smirked in return. He turned to face me completely while sitting on one leg and letting the other dangle off of his bed. “My head hurts.” He muttered.

“I bet,” I replied. “I’ll go get you something.”

“No, it’s okay. You helped me back here, the least I can do is get my own Advil or whatever,” He muttered. I nodded while yawning as he stood up from his bed. “What time is it?” He asked.

“Um,” I grabbed my purse and dug through it to find my cell phone. “5:35.” I replied.

“Ew,” Jonah responded. I laughed while Jonah slowly made his way out of his room and into his kitchen. I just followed after him, not really knowing what else to do. Jonah turned the kitchen light on and reached up to grab a glass from a cupboard. He then downed three pills and gulped down water afterwards.

“The sun’s not even up yet,” I said, mainly to myself.

"I have an idea," Jonah remarked. I raised an eyebrow and leaned against the counter.

“You go back to sleep and I go home and sleep?” I asked. Jonah smiled and smoothed down his dark brown hair a little bit.

“Nah, I’m not letting you get away that easy,” He replied. I rolled my eyes as he leaned down and got a small pot from a cupboard. He then poured water in it and placed it on his stove. “Fuck, my head hurts.” He repeated. He kind of looked like he was half asleep. The way he moved, it all looked so lazy and slow. It was kind of funny to watch though. His eyelids kept drooping downwards, but for some reason, he just continued what he was doing like he was on some mission.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“You’ll see,” He replied. Once the water started to boil, Jonah took it off and poured them into two mugs. He opened another cupboard, grabbed two hot chocolate packets, poured them in the cups and started to mix.

“You’re making us hot chocolate?” I asked.

“Yes,” He replied. “And we’re going to need them since its pretty cold outside.”

“We’re going outside?” I asked. “But it’s still pretty dark.”

“It won’t be for long,” He responded and handed me a mug. It was a little hot, and as if Jonah knew, he handed me a paper towel and I placed it around the mug.

“But I really should head to Dee’s house. I was supposed to come back last night. She’s probably worried,” I stated. Jonah stepped closer towards me until he was looking down at me, and I was looking up at him.

“Do you really want to miss out on the sunrise?” He asked quietly.

“Ugh, fine,” I muttered. Jonah smiled and walked towards the back of his house. I followed him out of his back door and he led me towards a swinging bench that was placed on the grass.

We both sat down and Jonah let out a huge sigh. I took a sip of my hot chocolate and raised my knees up to my chest. The sky was pretty orange now, and all the mountains in the distance seemed like they were trying to conceal it. Half of the sun was peeking through the top of them, but it was like the mountains refused to let it all shine through. It was gorgeous.

I took a deep breath and looked over at Jonah who was looking at the sunrise while biting his lip.

“It really sucked,” He muttered under his breath.

“What?” I asked.

“Having you walk out on me like that,” He replied and turned to look at me. I fidgeted with my cup and looked down at my feet.

“I’m sorry,” I replied.

Jonah shrugged while taking a sip of his hot chocolate. “I’ve just never been turned down before. And I honestly didn’t think that when I would, it’d end up like that,” He stated.

“Aw, did I bruise somebody’s ego?” I asked teasingly. Jonah just narrowed his eyes at me while I laughed, placed my mug down, and pulled my hair into a low, messy bun. “Are you home alone a lot?” I asked.

“Yeah,” Jonah replied. “I was actually living with my mom and her boyfriend in Minnesota before. But I wanted a change and decided to move here to Wisconsin with my dad and my sister. I knew that neither of them would be home a lot. My sister is always at school or work and my dad is God knows where. So, I’m usually here by myself or out doing stupid things.”

“It must be cool,” I stated. “To be independent. To take care of yourself. I feel like all my life, I’ve been dependent on everyone else. I can’t really stand on my own.”

“It’s not really what it’s all cracked up to be,” Jonah said before getting up and making his way back towards his house. “Stay there!” He yelled over his shoulder. I just smiled and leaned my back against the bench and started slowly swinging myself. I always did love swings.

About a minute later, Jonah came back with a folded blanket resting on his shoulder and a guitar in his hand. He sat back down by me and handed me the blanket which I gratefully received and placed around myself.

“So, are you going to serenade me?” I asked mockingly while Jonah just scrunched up his nose and took out a pick from his pocket. He placed a capo on a fret and strummed a few times.

“No, this just seems like a really good moment to play the guitar,” He replied with a shrug. He began to softly finger-pick while I closed my eyes peacefully. I’ve probably never been more relaxed than I was right at that moment.

“I fell in love again. All things go, all things go. Drove to Chicago. All things know, all things know. We sold our clothes to the state, I don't mind, I don't mind. I made a lot of mistakes, in my mind, in my mind.”

I opened my eyes and looked over at Jonah who just continued to play his guitar. He was singing the acoustic version of Chicago by Sufjan Stevens. A song that I personally loved to death. I was extremely surprised that he knew it, but I definitely wasn’t complaining. Jonah continued to sing it, while I closed my eyes and sang along with him.

“You came to take us, all things go, all things go. To recreate us, all things grow, all things grow. We had our mindset, all things know, all things know. You had to find it, all things go... all things go.”

He suddenly stopped and rested his head against the top of his guitar.

“I love that song,” I finally said. Jonah looked over at me and took a deep breath.

“You’re gonna hate me,” He muttered.

“Wha-" But just like last time, before I could finish, Jonah leaned over and kissed me again.