Dirty Laundry

Why it was suddenly my job to carry my Zayn files back to my office was a question I didn’t have the answer to. There should have been some mindless drone there to carry my things for me, but instead, I was half falling half walking towards my office, nearly dropping the box of heavy papers with every step I took. I wasn’t even a fourth of the way there when my grip on the cardboard began to loosen and I could feel the box slipping from my fingers.

“Here, let me get that for you.”

Liam came around the corner, smiling at me sweetly, while he took the box from my grasp. My eyes flicked to his toned biceps as he lifted the box into the air before the two of us walked side by side to my office.

“Where would you like it?” Liam asked, turning to me as soon as we walked through the door.

“Just on my desk is fine,” I said as I watched him place it comfortably on top of my desk calendar. “Thank you so much.”

“It’s no problem at all,” he said, smiling at me again before he leaned himself against my desk. He folded his arms across his chest as he looked at me, pausing briefly before speaking again. “So, how’s your case going?”

I shrugged my shoulders before I began digging into the box and pulling out the file I needed. “It’s going well, I think. I’m supposed to be meeting him in a few.”

“Oh.” Liam paused, nibbling at his bottom lip before speaking again. “Mia, can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” I said, putting down the folder and pulling my eyes away from it to look at him. His eyes were locked on mine, and he ran his hand once over the back of his neck before speaking.

“Do you ever feel bad about – ”

“About outing guys for cheating on their girls?” I finished for him.

He shook his head quickly, his arms falling from his chest to the tops of his pockets. “About – about not being able to love anyone yourself.”

“What?” My eyebrows furrowed, while my head tilted in confusion “You think I can’t love?”

“No,” he said quickly, shaking his head before he shrugged his shoulders. “I just don’t think you’ve gotten the chance to.”

“How’s that?”

He shrugged again. “Well, you spend most of your time wooing guys who you have no plans to be with. I mean, I don’t think I’ve seen you go on a real date in the time that I’ve known you.”

My mouth fell open as I looked at him, completely taken aback by what he said. Liam worked so closely with us – knew exactly what it was we did – that I never expected him of all people to judge me for it. I was so hurt and completely shocked that it took me a moment to respond.

“You think I don’t know that, Liam?” I said, my eyes blinking softly. “You think I don’t realize it every night when I sleep alone? You think I don’t hear it from my mother every time I visit home? I know that, Liam, and I don’t need assholes like you pointing it out for me.”

I turned away from him, picking up the folder off my desk so I could get out of my office and put distance between me and Liam as quickly as possible. His hand fell to my elbow, turning me around to face him.

“No,” he breathed out, his eyes looking down into mine. “That’s not what I meant.”

“I’ve gotta go,” I said quickly, moving my eyes to the door before I pulled out of his grasp. “Zayn’s waiting on me.”

I only made it a few steps forward before Liam had his arm on my shoulder, spinning me towards him again.

“Mia, wait,” he said softly, moving his hand from my shoulder and down my arm. “Please, don’t go. That wasn’t what this was supposed to be about. Please, just stay for a minute and talk to me.”

I pressed my lips together, eyes tightening as I looked at him. “I’ve gotta go, Liam.”

With that, I pulled my arm from his grasp, fingers wrapped tightly around Zayn’s file as I moved towards the door. Liam didn’t move an inch, and just watched me as I stepped out of the door and left him standing alone in my office, mouth open while his eyes were shut tightly.

My heart was pounding in my chest, while all my emotions were threatening to come out in tears. I was never much of a crier, except when I was angry, and this was one of those times. I didn’t know why what Liam had said hurt me so bad, but it was safe to assume that I had never expected him to say anything like that.

In the time I had known him, Liam had been nothing but nice to me. He was the one that supported my decisions when no one else did, including when I wanted to paint my office yellow, which never did end up happening.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to push all thoughts of Liam out of my mind, because I had a date with Zayn and I was planning on using him to help me forget all about Liam.