Junior Year

Pretty fucking terrible day. We lost a player in water polo because he didn't have the grades, so I'm taking up all his minutes. The good part is more playing time for me, but losing him really hurts the team. Found out my school love has a crush on this senior. Kind of disappointed, but not too much. I'm tired of second place. I can't take this any more; I can't take defeat any more; I can't take losing anymore; I can't take life anymore. What's so special about certain people? What's wrong with me? I've been in a pretty negative mindset since school ended. Hopefully it gets a little better tomorrow.