Sequel: Elysian ›
Status: In Progress
Restless Insomniacs
Daria
My eyelids are heavy as if someone has poured cement onto them, no matter how hard I try, and I do try they will not open, and it is not an entirely unsettling thought if I were to never open them again. Maybe tonight I shall sleep, maybe tonight, I hope pointlessly will be different.
I rub my tired eyes once more trying to remove the gritty feeling that I detest so much. I sigh and resign myself to the gritty feeling that is enveloping me from my toes to my head. I am a mere minute, I swear it, from elusive sleep when my phone vibrates and my tired eyes slip open.
I try to focus on where the sound is coming from but it is almost impossible, I think maybe it is Yale but remember he doesn’t even have my phone number, not that I am even sure I want him to after meeting his friends. The boys were all nice enough but the girl had sent daggers through me with her bloodshot eyes, it is a feeling I cannot escape.
I grope in the dark for my phone, which I remember placing on my bedside table now, “Hello?” I ask groggily into the receiver not bothering to check the caller ID, I wipe at my eyes and lay back on the bed waiting to hear from whoever has awoken me.
“Daria?” My name sounds high pitched and I instantly recognise that squeal of annoyance as belonging to my best friend, well only real friend besides Alex and I’m not sure I can count him as a friend anymore, Lara. I glance at the glowing clock in the darkness noticing the time is just past nine, something familiar rings in my head but I am too tired to pay attention to it.
“What?” I ask, I am not trying to be rude but I am just so tired, I can feel the weight of each and every one of my lashes and it is throwing off my concentration, I just want to go back to sleep.
“What?” She screeches, I cringe at the sound. “You forgot” She says without question in her voice, I sit up and reach for my lamp squinting as light floods my room, I hate it. I like the darkness, in the darkness no one can see me or my pain and that is truly magical, to be more than the girl with the abusive boyfriend and dead dad. To be more than I simply am is a wonderful thought and I will enjoy it till the day I die.
“Forgot what?” I ask, in the light my eyes are not as heavy as the darkness and I hate Lara for waking me up, pulling me from my wonderful dream of my angel. I glance at my knobby knees tracing a scar I got when my dad taught me to ride a bike, before pulling them to my chest and resting my heavy head on them.
“The double date” Lara says with such annoyance I swear she must hate me, not that I blame her, I would hate me too.
“Shit” I mumble as realisation floods me like the light did to my room a mere minute ago, the double date in question is one that I have been dreading for the past two weeks and Lara anxiously anticipating with glee. The date with Alex and his best friend Mark who Lara has only been crushing on since she was born, at least it feels that way. I scratch at an itch on the back on my head squeezing my eyes together and wishing this whole mess would just go away.
“Yeah, shit is right!” She mutters murder laced on her tongue, “We have been waiting for you”
“Even… Alex?” I ask a chill of fear running through my entire body, I can’t help but think of Yale and how disappointed he would be if he could see me backsliding into my worst habit, backsliding into Alex.
“Yes! he is worried about you, we all are. Especially since you have been hanging around Yale Beckett, you know he is no good for you,” I barely listen as she rants, not because I don’t deserve it because I do but because she is so far from the mark, all Yale has done is treat me nicely and with respect something Alex failed to do even from the beginning of our relationship.
“Lara I am so sorry, I just lost track of time”
“Please D, you forgot” It is the childhood nickname that really punches me hard in the gut and I feel like dirt, worse than dirt if that is possible, like the insignificant worms that live in the dirt.
“Alright I forgot” I admit my heart hurting at the thought of Alex and Lara waiting for me, I truly do hate myself, every centimetre from tips of my toes to the ends of my hair.
“I would never have forgotten if it were you” Lara says before dial tone rings hollow in my ear, I stare at my feet and bite down on my tongue hoping to draw blood. I am disappointed when not even the pain feels good.
I am no longer tired, I swallow the rusty tasting spit in my mouth suddenly very, very awake.
I rub my tired eyes once more trying to remove the gritty feeling that I detest so much. I sigh and resign myself to the gritty feeling that is enveloping me from my toes to my head. I am a mere minute, I swear it, from elusive sleep when my phone vibrates and my tired eyes slip open.
I try to focus on where the sound is coming from but it is almost impossible, I think maybe it is Yale but remember he doesn’t even have my phone number, not that I am even sure I want him to after meeting his friends. The boys were all nice enough but the girl had sent daggers through me with her bloodshot eyes, it is a feeling I cannot escape.
I grope in the dark for my phone, which I remember placing on my bedside table now, “Hello?” I ask groggily into the receiver not bothering to check the caller ID, I wipe at my eyes and lay back on the bed waiting to hear from whoever has awoken me.
“Daria?” My name sounds high pitched and I instantly recognise that squeal of annoyance as belonging to my best friend, well only real friend besides Alex and I’m not sure I can count him as a friend anymore, Lara. I glance at the glowing clock in the darkness noticing the time is just past nine, something familiar rings in my head but I am too tired to pay attention to it.
“What?” I ask, I am not trying to be rude but I am just so tired, I can feel the weight of each and every one of my lashes and it is throwing off my concentration, I just want to go back to sleep.
“What?” She screeches, I cringe at the sound. “You forgot” She says without question in her voice, I sit up and reach for my lamp squinting as light floods my room, I hate it. I like the darkness, in the darkness no one can see me or my pain and that is truly magical, to be more than the girl with the abusive boyfriend and dead dad. To be more than I simply am is a wonderful thought and I will enjoy it till the day I die.
“Forgot what?” I ask, in the light my eyes are not as heavy as the darkness and I hate Lara for waking me up, pulling me from my wonderful dream of my angel. I glance at my knobby knees tracing a scar I got when my dad taught me to ride a bike, before pulling them to my chest and resting my heavy head on them.
“The double date” Lara says with such annoyance I swear she must hate me, not that I blame her, I would hate me too.
“Shit” I mumble as realisation floods me like the light did to my room a mere minute ago, the double date in question is one that I have been dreading for the past two weeks and Lara anxiously anticipating with glee. The date with Alex and his best friend Mark who Lara has only been crushing on since she was born, at least it feels that way. I scratch at an itch on the back on my head squeezing my eyes together and wishing this whole mess would just go away.
“Yeah, shit is right!” She mutters murder laced on her tongue, “We have been waiting for you”
“Even… Alex?” I ask a chill of fear running through my entire body, I can’t help but think of Yale and how disappointed he would be if he could see me backsliding into my worst habit, backsliding into Alex.
“Yes! he is worried about you, we all are. Especially since you have been hanging around Yale Beckett, you know he is no good for you,” I barely listen as she rants, not because I don’t deserve it because I do but because she is so far from the mark, all Yale has done is treat me nicely and with respect something Alex failed to do even from the beginning of our relationship.
“Lara I am so sorry, I just lost track of time”
“Please D, you forgot” It is the childhood nickname that really punches me hard in the gut and I feel like dirt, worse than dirt if that is possible, like the insignificant worms that live in the dirt.
“Alright I forgot” I admit my heart hurting at the thought of Alex and Lara waiting for me, I truly do hate myself, every centimetre from tips of my toes to the ends of my hair.
“I would never have forgotten if it were you” Lara says before dial tone rings hollow in my ear, I stare at my feet and bite down on my tongue hoping to draw blood. I am disappointed when not even the pain feels good.
I am no longer tired, I swallow the rusty tasting spit in my mouth suddenly very, very awake.