Our Pain Will Shine a Light

Matt's POV

I was sitting cross legged on the mattress when Andy walked back in. The look on his face killed me, but this is just how it had to be.

"You okay?" I asked quietly." He stopped walking and his head hung low. There was a sniffle then he shook his head no. "Come here."

He sat down beside me on the mattress and I hugged him like a big brother comforting his sibling.

"I called Ashley, and he thinks I'm fine."

"It's better that way."

"I miss him already."

"You really like him huh? How'd you get him to kiss you anyway?"

"How'd you know?"

"Well there was that kiss before we left, but I knew there was one before because of that goofy smile of yours."

"What goofy smile?"

"That stupid smile you get when you see someone attractive."

"I don't have a goofy smile."

"You do, but tell me."

"Well, I just asked him to I guess. I told him I'd stay the night if he kissed me. It was a quick peck, but it satisfied me."

"Do you think there's a possiblilty of a relationship there?"

"I don't know if he feels that way."

"Feels for you like you feel for him?"

"I don't feel for him."

"You liar. Oh, Ashley! I want to be with you for as long as I can!" I mocked.

"I did not say that!"

"Yeah you did. It's alright though. I can tell you that he likes you a lot too."

"Really?"

"Yeah dumbass. What did he say to you on the phone when you called him?"

"Nothing really. I told him I missed him and he said he missed me too. Then he called me Autumn or something, but I had to hang up."

"Autumn? See, he already gave you a pet name."

"How do you know it wasn't his mom's name or something?

"Ashley doesn't just talk about her, you know. I've been over his house a couple of times, and he only brings her up on occasion, but no one really knows her name."

"You know, I miss mom and dad, but I couldn't handle going through what he had to."

"We should be great flu that our parents are still alive you know? When's the last time you've talked to your parents anyway?"

"The day I left that town full of shit."

"Call them, write to them, do something Andrew."

"I'm writing to them in my notebook. Each journal entry says dear mom and dad. I'm probably not going to give it to them, but it's something. You're talking to me about my life, what about you. What happened to your parents?"

"They moved back home when I turned 18. Haven't spoken to them since they put me on the street."

"That sucks."

"Yeah it does, but what happens happens."

Andy unhooked himself from my grip and laid across my mattress.

"What were you thinking when you took your first hit?"

"I don't know. I was afraid I guess, but there was that second of adrenaline, you know, that excited feeling that makes you keep going. Then I was hooked. The dealer told me to wait a couple of days before I tried to hit again. Now here I am."

"It was the same for me. You were there though."

"Yeah I was. I wish I had the guts to stop you."

"I wish I had the guts to stop myself. But look where we are. Here in a completely different state, but we've made best friends of each other."

"I guess you're right."

"I know I am."

We sat there in dead air for a few minutes before I broke the silence.

"I'll quit if you quit."

Andy waited a moment then opened his mouth.

"Deal."

"I love you kid. You know that right?"

"Yeah, I know. And I love you too."

"I'm going to get you back to Ashley, and this isn't going to happen again. Understand?"

"Yeah. I got it."

"Good. Get some sleep."

"Can I stay over here?"

"No. You have to sleep in your designated spot. It's an unspoken rule."

"Fine. Goodnight."

"Night Biersack."