Remembering Sunday
Three. (The Fire Escape)
Dear Journal,
There is nothing like the view of the Manhattan skyline at night all lit up. I finally did it, I'm finally here. I'm living my childhood dream calling this place home. And surprisingly, my favorite spot in my apartment is the fire escape. Sitting out here on a cool, breezy night is actually the most relaxing thing I’ve done in a while. It’s also nice that I can finally stop sneaking around so I can smoke. That’s the one thing I hate about Alex. I can’t believe I started smoking because I thought it made me look cool to him just because he did it. He just walked right out of my life and I’m still wasting way too much money because of him. I do miss him every minute of every day though. How come I can’t just let it go? It was a summer fling, I was a rebound. That’s it. Maybe Kellin can help me get over him. I can’t believe I got so lucky with my neighbor. Though, it would be nice to know if he was on my left or right considering I’m sharing this fire escape with someone with one of those neighbors. I guess I’ll find out eventually. Or right now, someone’s opening the window.
Xoxo – Michelle
“Ya know, contrary to popular belief, once you move out on your own, those things don’t make you look cool.” It was Kellin, with the window sharing the fire escape. Thank God.
“It’s not that, I’m just one of those stupid girls who won’t say no to a guy I like even if it’ll get me hooked on something.” He climbed out sitting across from me, pointing back into the window now.
“I’ve got some heroine in there, you wanna give that a try?”
“Shut up.” I laughed as I put out the cigarette, “It wasn’t only that. I’ve never really had the best ways of coping with stress and these stupid little things are an instant calm me down.”
“Come on, what are you stressing about at three in the morning?”
“I’ve never been on my own like this before. It’s really weird. I have no one telling me what to do or how I have to get everything in order, I can do what I want when I want. I mean, it’s awesome, but…”
“You’ve got no one?” He cut me off, finishing my sentence with exactly what was going through my head.
“It’s not like at home I had anyone around at this hour anyway, but I know I’m gonna wake up and still be alone. That’s what’s really getting to me. I don’t know, I’ve always wanted to be in Manhattan at any cost, but I always had this dream that I’d make a ton of friends as soon as I moved in and I’d be out every night and I’d barely ever be alone but I guess that’s why it’s a dream, right?” I looked over the railing at the sky, I miss the stars.
“What, no boyfriend to come stay with you at night?” He was being serious but I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Please, the closest thing I’ve had to a relationship was a thing over the summer that ended as soon as he left to go to school and I haven’t heard from him since. I was just a summer play thing since he was on the rebound from his ex.” I felt Kellin’s hand on my knee. Three AM and I’ll let anything out, I really hope I don’t scare him away already.
“He’s an idiot. I know I’ve only known you for about twelve hours, but it doesn’t take getting to know you to know that you’re beautiful. And you seem like a really chill girl. He’s really missing out because he made a stupid choice. Don’t get caught up on him though, you might miss something great. You’re in the city where dreams come true now, you can do anything your heart desires. And with millions of people, I’m sure you’ll find someone to make you forget about that loser.” I looked over right into his eyes. Every doubt about New York is suddenly gone. I made the right choice moving here on my own.
“So what about you? Why are you up this late?”
“I wasn’t. I woke up to get a glass of water and I saw you out here. Something made me wanna come out and see what was up.”
“You should go back to sleep. I don’t wanna keep you up.” He smirked at me.
“It’s no problem, really. This is the city that never sleeps.” My lips curled up, forcing a smile onto my face.
“Well, I’m getting pretty tired, so unless you’re gonna sit out here alone all night, I suggest you go to bed too.” He laughed. Something about the way he looked at me made my heart melt in the best way possible.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Well, I think I’m gonna be moving furniture around so I’ll probably need your help.” He smiled, it was adorable.
“Goodnight Michelle.”
“Night Kellin.” I watched him climb back into the window.
New York; the city where dreams do come true.
There is nothing like the view of the Manhattan skyline at night all lit up. I finally did it, I'm finally here. I'm living my childhood dream calling this place home. And surprisingly, my favorite spot in my apartment is the fire escape. Sitting out here on a cool, breezy night is actually the most relaxing thing I’ve done in a while. It’s also nice that I can finally stop sneaking around so I can smoke. That’s the one thing I hate about Alex. I can’t believe I started smoking because I thought it made me look cool to him just because he did it. He just walked right out of my life and I’m still wasting way too much money because of him. I do miss him every minute of every day though. How come I can’t just let it go? It was a summer fling, I was a rebound. That’s it. Maybe Kellin can help me get over him. I can’t believe I got so lucky with my neighbor. Though, it would be nice to know if he was on my left or right considering I’m sharing this fire escape with someone with one of those neighbors. I guess I’ll find out eventually. Or right now, someone’s opening the window.
Xoxo – Michelle
“Ya know, contrary to popular belief, once you move out on your own, those things don’t make you look cool.” It was Kellin, with the window sharing the fire escape. Thank God.
“It’s not that, I’m just one of those stupid girls who won’t say no to a guy I like even if it’ll get me hooked on something.” He climbed out sitting across from me, pointing back into the window now.
“I’ve got some heroine in there, you wanna give that a try?”
“Shut up.” I laughed as I put out the cigarette, “It wasn’t only that. I’ve never really had the best ways of coping with stress and these stupid little things are an instant calm me down.”
“Come on, what are you stressing about at three in the morning?”
“I’ve never been on my own like this before. It’s really weird. I have no one telling me what to do or how I have to get everything in order, I can do what I want when I want. I mean, it’s awesome, but…”
“You’ve got no one?” He cut me off, finishing my sentence with exactly what was going through my head.
“It’s not like at home I had anyone around at this hour anyway, but I know I’m gonna wake up and still be alone. That’s what’s really getting to me. I don’t know, I’ve always wanted to be in Manhattan at any cost, but I always had this dream that I’d make a ton of friends as soon as I moved in and I’d be out every night and I’d barely ever be alone but I guess that’s why it’s a dream, right?” I looked over the railing at the sky, I miss the stars.
“What, no boyfriend to come stay with you at night?” He was being serious but I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Please, the closest thing I’ve had to a relationship was a thing over the summer that ended as soon as he left to go to school and I haven’t heard from him since. I was just a summer play thing since he was on the rebound from his ex.” I felt Kellin’s hand on my knee. Three AM and I’ll let anything out, I really hope I don’t scare him away already.
“He’s an idiot. I know I’ve only known you for about twelve hours, but it doesn’t take getting to know you to know that you’re beautiful. And you seem like a really chill girl. He’s really missing out because he made a stupid choice. Don’t get caught up on him though, you might miss something great. You’re in the city where dreams come true now, you can do anything your heart desires. And with millions of people, I’m sure you’ll find someone to make you forget about that loser.” I looked over right into his eyes. Every doubt about New York is suddenly gone. I made the right choice moving here on my own.
“So what about you? Why are you up this late?”
“I wasn’t. I woke up to get a glass of water and I saw you out here. Something made me wanna come out and see what was up.”
“You should go back to sleep. I don’t wanna keep you up.” He smirked at me.
“It’s no problem, really. This is the city that never sleeps.” My lips curled up, forcing a smile onto my face.
“Well, I’m getting pretty tired, so unless you’re gonna sit out here alone all night, I suggest you go to bed too.” He laughed. Something about the way he looked at me made my heart melt in the best way possible.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Well, I think I’m gonna be moving furniture around so I’ll probably need your help.” He smiled, it was adorable.
“Goodnight Michelle.”
“Night Kellin.” I watched him climb back into the window.
New York; the city where dreams do come true.