Burning You Down

“Good mooooorning, sunshine…”

I frowned slightly and buried my face in the pillow.

“…Rise and shiiiiine, motherfucker…”

My eye flickered open, but I closed it quickly again.

“Come on, baby, wake the fuck up.”

I still ignored the voice. That’s how it felt to literally have a demon on your shoulder, whispering in your ear.

“Okay, then, if it’s not going to work the easy way, I have something that would make you get up pretty quickly…”

I felt his hand slide down my stomach and before I could understand what was going on he grabbed my crotch. Startled (even though it actually felt good, I can’t deny that), I gasped, my eyes opening wide, and I jumped, which was a bad idea considering that I was lying on the very edge of the bed and this simple movement was enough for me to slip to the ground (not very gracefully, might I add) along with my pillow. That’s what I call waking up with a start.

I quickly stumbled to my feet.

“Vic, what the fuck?!”, I yelled at him. He threw me a content grin and took over the bed, stealing my blanket.

“I was sure that this would send you outta bed, my dear shy little boy.”, he winked.

“Ah, fuck you!” Angry, I threw my pillow at him, but he simply vanished.

Goddamn demon tricks!

“Anyways.”, his voice continued right behind me, startling me once more. I turned around sharply to find him standing only a few inches away from me. “Slept well, darling?”

“Well, if we ignore the fact that you kept me up half of the night, yeah, I slept well.”, I frowned, still pretty pissed at him, and stepped away so my face wouldn’t be stuck in his. “It’s Saturday. You didn’t need to wake me up this early!”

“Oh, but I did. I know that yesterday was all fun and shit, but that was like… a welcome party. I even let you boss around a bit. But that was it. From now on, you do what I tell you to and we follow our first agreement.”

I let out a deep sigh. And last night I had almost convinced myself he actually is a nice guy…

“Here.” Vic teleported to my desk, obviously too lazy to simply walk there, or perhaps he was just showing off. “Last night while you were sleeping I prepared a list with my requests. Those are the things I need you to do.”

He took a sheet of paper and handed it out, expecting me to walk to him and take it. I was still mad at him for waking me up like this, though, and I just stood there with my arms crossed, to show him I have no intention to do what he expects me to… at least for now. He sighed heavily and rolled his eyes.

“Come on, I won’t wait for you here all day, sleepyhead.”, he urged me, waving the sheet in the air. I remained where I was, though. Nope, nope, nope, I wasn’t taking his shit anymore.

Another sigh let me know that maybe I went a bit too far. The demon waved his other hand and I felt something… really strange. Like being dragged across the room by some invisible force. I yelped and my feet slipped across the floor all by themselves as I flew across it straight towards the desk, went past it and slammed heavily in the wall next to it. I moaned as I hit my head and the force disappeared as suddenly as it came, letting me drop to the ground.

“…Oops.”, Vic looked at me innocently. “My, my, I wonder how this happened. Thank Satan you have such a wonderful sweet demon gentleman to reach out a hand for you, hm?” And as he said that he offered me a hand to help me get up, the whole time smirking in his own, particularly annoying way.

I glared at him and stood up by myself, without taking his hand. I wanted him to see clearly that I didn’t like being dragged around like a sack of flour or something. But I thought he knew this damn well already.

After I was finally standing on my feet steadily he stuck the sheet in my face.

“Read.”, he ordered.

At first I had thought he was joking or exaggerating when he said he made a list with his requests, but that’s exactly what it was. His handwriting was large and sharp, the strokes of the “y’s” and “g’s” long and low, and he had pressed the pen to the sheet so hard that I could tell what was written on it only by touching it. I furrowed my eyebrows at it and, want it or not, I started reading.

“Saturday, November the 2nd
WHAT I SHOULD DO TO SHOW VIC WHAT A GOOD BOY I AM:

1) Prepare breakfast. An omelet would be good. Or fried eggs. Preferably with some bacon and a cup of coffee. To be served before 11AM.
2) Teach my beloved demon buddy how to use a TV.
3) Teach my beloved demon buddy how to use a computer
4) Teach my beloved demon buddy how to use a radio
5) Prepare lunch. Lunch includes: salad, some chicken, and dessert (either ice cream or chocolate cake) To be served before 2PM.
6) Clean your beloved demon buddy’s boots
7) Let him have a little siesta, because, oh boy, isn’t watching someone clean your boots exhausting!
8) Prepare dinner. No special requests for this one, but it shouldn’t be the same as the lunch.

The rest of your time is free.”

“The dinner must be served before eight, by the way.”, Vic added as he noticed I was done with reading the list. “Because, as you already know, I have a date at eight thirty.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Someone’s gonna make that Sarah girl happy.”

“You’re disgusting.”, I declared, managing to hide that I was actually amused. In contrast with last night, now the demon looked almost happy, kind of eager, and I could imagine why…

Anyway, my attention was drawn back to the sheet of paper in my hands.

“I’m okay with preparing breakfast and all that shit… But cleaning your boots? Really now?! I’m not gonna clean your fucking boots!”, I protested.

“Yes, you are.”, he made a disappointed face. “Oh, come on, darling. Don’t make me write that sign on your forehead again. I know you don’t need it to remember you’re my bitch, you know it perfectly well. It’s only that you should stop trying to be the little rebel you are. Why disobey me, when we can both disobey all the others?”

I murmured something under my nose, not wanting to answer him. I didn’t know what to say anyway. He was right, I wasn’t in a position to argue. I don’t know what I was thinking last night when for a moment I was convinced that we were actually something like friends. It seems I was damn wrong about that.

“What did you say, sweetheart?”, he tilted head, amused smile dancing on his lips. “Oh, come on, if you want to keep this conversation going, I recommend you to speak louder.”

“What if I don’t want to keep this conversation going?”, I raised an eyebrow at him.

He stared me for a moment and then let out a short laughter.

“Hah! Then you better run downstairs real quick and cook breakfast for me instead. C’mon.”, he motioned at the door.

I hesitated, but there was nothing I could do, so I decided it would be better if I do what he tells me to. Being the rebel I was, though, I didn’t “run downstairs” as he said, instead I purposely took my time and headed there as slowly as possible, moving my feet heavily as if I was trying to pull Titanic out of the ocean. Surprisingly, Vic didn’t follow me. Hopefully he was sick of my bullshit and he gave up on following me everywhere. I desperately hoped he did. I was getting really sick of having to look after him the whole time. Not that it was boring. It was just… so… so fucking… irritating. Ugh.

Still moving slower than a fucking snail, I started going downstairs, basically sliding my feet down the staircase, producing a loud thud at each step, managing to pretty much resemble what earlier I insisted I wasn’t – a sack of flour.

“Kellin, dear, what are you doing?”

I froze and looked up. My mom was standing by the railing and watching me, looking slightly worried. I realized I must’ve looked really weird, walking like this, and she might have thought I was hurt or something.

“Um, nothing.”, I smiled at her guiltily, like a child caught doing something forbidden, which wasn’t so far from the truth, actually. “Walt stayed for a sleepover and he said he bets I can’t go down the stairs slower than him. I’m trying to prove him wrong.”

I soundlessly congratulated myself for the convincing excuse. Walt and I often did bullshit like that. This thought made me think of him again and the emptiness in my soul, which he usually filled, now stabbed me like a knife. I missed him, and I needed him back, I wanted him back so badly. But the only way to actually get him back was to follow Vic’s orders, and at this moment they were to make him an omelet. And this couldn’t happen if I kept standing there in the middle of the stairs like a total idiot.

“Umm, so yeah, I guess I win.”, I smiled again, hoping my mom bought it. She seemed to believe me, though, because she just shook her head with her ‘Ah, boys…’ expression and walked into her bedroom, smiling a bit.

Damn. Okay. I got out with this one easily. Relieved, I continued on my way, completely forgetting to play all rebellious, and hurried to the kitchen. I swung the door open…

“You’re late.”, a steady voice greeted me.

Vic was calmly sitting there already with his legs lifted on the table (at least he had taken off his shoes), and reading a newspaper, holding it in such way that it would cover his face. As I closed the door behind me, he flipped it down, revealing the unamused glare he gave me. I stood there, getting that guilty expression again.

He rolled eyes. “Come on, move, don’t stand there like a punished student. I want my breakfast, and I want it now. Fried eggs and coffee.”

“I thought you wanted an omelet?”, I looked down at the list in my hands.

“Ah, I did, but I changed my mind. Whatever. Just hurry up.”, I waved his hand and opened the newspaper again.

I held back an annoyed sigh and opened the fridge. It was stuffed with different kinds of food and an avalanche of broccoli almost killed me as I tried to peek in. The thing with our fridge is that every member of our family has their own shelf, and you can tell whose it is by the things it contains. My mom’s shelf was full of stuff she needs for cooking for all of us, plus some chocolate and Nutella – her weakness. My sister’s was much healthier – it was all covered with low-fat yogurts, diet coke, vegetables and other dietetic shit like that. In contrast with theirs, mine was almost empty. I don’t eat much, so I don’t need many things, and now there was only a bottle of coke, a bottle of orange juice, some fruit, what was left from the pizza I had bought for me and Walt to eat on Halloween and that was pretty much it. Three shelves, for the three members of our family. And a fourth one that we shared; there we put the meals mom cooked and things we all liked. Like eggs… but I didn’t find any now.

“Oh, bad news, Vic. I can’t prepare your breakfast, there are no eggs.”, I gave him a fake sympathetic look. “I’m sorry.”

He finally left the newspaper on the table and gave me a long, searching look, and then shrugged.

“Well, then. Be right back.”

“Where are you go-”, I started, but he had already disappeared. “-ing…?” I sighed. “Fuck this.”

I expected him to return right away, but this time he was gone for awhile. Not sure what to do while he’s away, I sat down by the table and took the newspaper he had been reading, checking out the first page. Nothing interesting… at least I thought so at first. I turned the page, just because I was starting to get bored… and here it was. It hit me like a lightning. One simple title:

“Boy ruthlessly beaten up, now at the hospital with severe injuries”

And below it:

“The seventeen-year-old teenager Jesse Lawson gets attacked after his sister’s birthday party; refuses to tell the police who did it, probably his attacker has threatened him…”

I didn’t need to read any more to guess what had happened, but I moved my look down the article to make sure Jesse’s going to be okay. The journalist who wrote it claimed that the doctors said he’s going to recover completely, but it would take at least a few months.

…Vic. That son of a bitch. That goddamn son of a bitch.

I felt a movement, something like weak wind, and I knew that Vic had returned even before he spoke:

“Here, I stole- ahem, I mean, I got some eggs!”, he put a shopping bag on the table, grinning widely and looking proud of himself. I glared at him. He pouted, not understanding the reason for my sudden irritation. “Oh, come on. I didn’t hear a ‘thank you’.”

I didn’t reply, instead I picked the newspaper up in a way he could see it. “What the fuck is this?”, I asked dryly, referring to the article.

“Um, I think you, humans, call it a ‘newspaper’. Isn’t that so?”, he blinked innocently.

“No, I mean, what is that?!”, I raised my voice, pointing at the title. “I told you not to do it!”

He narrowed his eyes at it, reading it. “…Oh, honey, I wish I had done it, but it wasn’t me. Someone else kicked that poor son of a bitch’s ass.”

“I know it was you!”, I yelled at him. “You were going to do it last night, but I stopped you, so you went and did it later!”

“Or maybe he’s such a big asshole that someone else hated him enough to beat him up instead.”, Victor shrugged calmly.

Damn, how calm he was! I wanted him to yell, I wanted him to get just as angry as I was, but he was just standing there and watching me, his face blank.

“Why do you keep denying it anyway?”, I shook my head. “I know it was you. Why do you keep on lying? Because you enjoy it?”

“I’m not lying. And maybe I should.”, his face darkened and I could tell that he had begun to get angry. “Listen, kid, you can’t simply talk to me like this. Even if I had beaten the guy up, which I haven’t, you can’t yell at me like this. You can’t tell me what to do.”

“I know I can’t, but I try. You can’t simply do things like this to people, Victor.”

“Why do you care so much anyway?!”, he spread his arms. “You hate the guy. He hates you too, and he was going to hurt you. What’s the big deal?”

“He was my friend!”, I threw the newspaper away. “And even though he isn’t anymore, once I counted on him, and he meant a lot to me, and I can’t… But why am I explaining to you anyway? You’re just a demon. You don’t understand.”

“Oh, I don’t understand?”, he raised eyebrows, clenching his fists.

“Yes!”, I didn’t give up. “You don’t understand, because you can’t fucking feel a thing, can you? You only know how to hurt people. That’s what you’re created for. That’s what you are. A walking, talking torture instrument.”

I expected to get a punch for this or something, I mean, yeah, I know I went too far, I went further than I ever had. Perhaps I shouldn’t have said all these things, but I just couldn’t help it. Vic didn’t hit me, though, instead he stepped back, looking somehow… hurt? Hurt, upset and alone…

“…A walking, talking torture instrument.”, he repeated slowly. “Okay, then.”

I bit my lower lip. “No, Vic, look…”

He raised his hand to stop me and I shut up, now regretting what I had told him.

“Okay then.”, he said lowly once more and looked at me, his deep brown eyes sparkling brighter now, but somehow differently… After a long silent minute he let out a slow sigh and disappeared, leaving me alone in the middle of the kitchen.

…Well done, Kellin, you just made things even worse than they already were. Well fucking done. I waited for him to come back for awhile, but he never returned, so I decided to put the eggs in the fridge and go back upstairs. Obviously he didn’t want his breakfast anymore. Well, good for me.

As I came in my bedroom, I expected to find him there, but it was empty. I couldn’t help but feel a little bad for what I had said to him. Maybe I was wrong, maybe he wasn’t completely unable to feel, and perhaps, just like ours, demons’ feelings could be hurt, too. I wondered if he was lying about that thing with Jesse. What if he really didn’t do it? Then I had offended him for no reason. Damn, even if he did beat Jesse up, he had done it for me, no matter that I didn’t want him to. That was, in a very demon-ish kind of way, somehow sweet. Shit! I really shouldn’t have yelled at him like this. Ah, what an idiot I was.

I sat down on my bed heavily, angry at myself. Great. Now I had probably pissed him off. For a second I was worried that he’s gone somewhere to hurt Walt’s body to punish me, but then I remembered that he had a date tonight, and I doubted that he’d sacrifice his appearance for one stupid insult. Well, wherever he was, I couldn’t do anything to get him back. I just had to wait.

My look fell on his boots on the floor and I remembered about the list he had written for me. Yeah… I had to make it up to him. I had to find a way to apologize.

I just had to try.

* * *

I was lying in my bed and reading a book when I felt the familiar soft wind in the air and I knew that Vic had appeared in my room. I looked up to see him stand by the window and watch me, but as our eyes met he avoided my look, staring down at the ground. Oh. So he was still mad, wow, okay then. Three hours had passed ever since, and he still didn’t want to talk to me. However, I wanted to see what he wants, because, yeah, he wouldn’t come if he didn’t want something, so I decided to speak up. Surprisingly, before I could, he did it first:

“I really didn’t do this to your friend.”, he said quietly. “You asked me not to hurt him, so I didn’t-”

“No, look, forget it.”, I interrupted him, surprised by his soft tone. All his sassiness was suddenly gone. “Whatever happened, it doesn’t matter anymore. Let’s just forget about it, please.”

He tilted his head, observing me, and stepped closer, still keeping at some distance.

“You don’t believe me, do you?”, he blinked.

“Well, no offense, but you’re a demon and demons lie.”, I pointed out with a bitter smile. Honestly, I didn’t mean to be this rude, but I really didn’t know what else to say.

“Yeah…” He looked down again with a sigh, now looking somehow sad. “Demons lie. We’re just lying, cheating torture instruments, nothing more.”

“Look, about that, I’m sorry.”, I bit my lip. “I apologize, I really didn’t mean it.”

“So you’re not mad at me anymore?”, he brightened up, just a little bit.

Oh, God, he really didn’t know anything about feelings, didn’t he!

“I’m still mad, a little.”, I admitted.

“Then how can I make you… not mad?”, the demon walked to the bed and sat on its edge.

“For starters, an apology would do.”, I shrugged.

“An apology?”, he repeated, as if he didn’t understand the word.

“Yes. You know. You could say ‘I’m sorry’ or something.”

Vic frowned. “I’ve never apologized to anyone! What makes you think I’m gonna change this now?”

I simply shrugged again. I didn’t really expect him to do it. I knew perfectly well that he was too proud for this.

His eyes moved from my face to the floor and fell on the now clean boots. I had decided to do it for him, after all, hoping this would make things better. A small smile appeared on his face and I knew I succeeded. He shifted a bit closer, casting me a look. For a second I thought he was about to thank me, but being the stubborn demon he was, he just let out a short, muffled chuckle. I wondered what was on his mind right now. You can never tell what he’s thinking. I guess that for the five thousand years of life he had learned how to contain his emotions and hide them well. His body language was all smiles disguised as frowns, sighs disguised as giggles, sadness disguised as amusement, and warmth disguised as coldness, all covered by a shield of fake arrogance. He was a complicated cipher I couldn’t decode, because I couldn’t reach the key, which he kept buried deep inside him. I was struggling to understand him, and from time to time I was almost sure I managed to do it, but in the next moment he left me confused again. I suppose it was a way to protect himself. Spending an eternity in hell sounds quite dangerous. The only way to hide his regrets and fears would be to put on this mask of the confident, ironic demon, who didn’t care about anything and anyone, and it seemed that now he had forgotten how to remove it. Maybe I could figure him out, with some effort, but only if he let me, and I knew he wouldn’t.

“…So.”, he suddenly started. “Do you want to show me how this TV works? I’m curious to know what humans watch these days. Last time I came here on Earth, we watched theater. It was fun. I heard TV is something like it?”

I smiled, relieved that the awkward silence was over. I really didn’t want to have this conversation anymore. It would be better if it remained forgotten, at least for now.

“Mm, not exactly. It’s quite different actually, but yeah, there are actors and things like that if that’s what you mean. It’s interesting, you’ll see.”

“Show me!”, he grinned almost childishly.

“Okay, okay, sure. Let’s go downstairs if you want, the TV in the living room is the biggest one we’ve got, it would be way more impressing. Come on…”

END OF CHAPTER 7.