Suffocation.

I woke up to the soothing feeling of someone rubbing my back. I opened my eyes and turned my head to see my dad sitting on the edge of my bed.

"Hey Kiddo," he murmured to me.

"What are you doing here?" As I yawn I can feel a certain tightness in my chest.

"Here," my dad handed me the white pills from my proscription bottle. I thanked him for them before swallowing them. "Frankie told me what happened."

"Where is she?"

"She wanted to call off work but I told her that I had an easy day today, so I could do it from here."

"I don't need a babysitter," I say harshly.

"I know but I figured that Toby, you and I could do something."

"Toby's home? I thought he had school."

"There's really no point when winter break is only a few days away. He'll start when you do, in January."

"Well then what do you have in mind?"

My dad thought for only a moment before speaking. "I could show you around New York City."

I nod my head and my dad leaves me to get ready. I decided against what I had been wearing; leggings and baggy tops, and top on some new things that I found in my closet. My cream cable knit sweater clung to my body and kept me warm underneath my coat as Toby helped me into the garage. My dad had already put my wheel chair into the back of his Lexus hybrid.

"Nice car, Dad," Toby said from the back seat.

"Thanks, Kiddo. I just got it a few months ago, still got that new car smell. Maybe when Lennon is all healed up we can get her one of these bad boys."

"Really?" I ask as he starts the engine and pulls out of the driveway.

"Well you're going to need to drive back and forth from school and Daphne has a lot of after school activities so your schedules will be different. It would make since if both of you had your own car."

I nodded from the passenger seat beside him. I watched as my dad fiddled with the buttons on the steering wheel as we drove onto the highway.

"What kind of music do you like?"

"Anything, but the sixties is my favorite," I tell him.

"Ah, you are your mother's daughter. Born in the wrong decade," he laughs as he turns on the radio.

The car ride into the city was just about an hour long and I couldn't believe that my dad drove this every day. I was glad that he loved his job and loved his car, because you would need to.

Downtown Huntsville, Alabama was nothing compared to New York City. All of the people, and sounds, and bright lights, and tall buildings were overwhelming but beautiful. I loved seeing all walks of life coming together on the streets and coexisting as one.

We parked in the parking garage and set out for our first spot on our schedule. The first on our list was the World Trade Center Memorial and Museum. Even though I was only five and Toby was less than a year old, 9/11 was a big deal for us, or at least my mom and dad. The terrorist attack happened just after my parents agreed to get a divorce and my dad moved to Greenwich and started working in New York City. The business my dad had been working for was located in the North Tower.

I remember so vividly watching my mom as she watched the television while tears streamed down her face. She tried calling my dad hundreds of times and even tried calling Denise. She was frantic and emotional, thinking that her ex-husband and the father of her two children was now dead.

It turned out that Denise went into labor early that morning and my dad was at the hospital with her. Both of their cell phones had been left in my dad's coat pocket while they were in the delivery room. They didn't know what had happened until Melanie was born and my dad got all of my mom's voice mails.

My dad says that Melanie saved his life, if she didn't decide to come early then there would be no doubt that my dad would be gone and Toby and I would currently be wards of the state until I reached the age of eighteen. So I was thankful for her early arrival as well.

Once we paid our tribute and my dad thanked all of the Gods for his fortunate life we gathered in a taxi. This was Toby and I's first taxi ride and it was something that I had been looking forward to.

The taxi took us a few blocks away to Madame Tussauds. Inside, we went up and down the elevator and into all the different rooms and parts of the max museum of famous people. My dad took Toby and my picture next to everyone from Kim Kardashian to President Obama.

After seeing everything at Madame Tussauds it was around lunch time. My dad treated us to lunch at this high end cafe with amazing food. They didn't serve chicken fingers, what was Toby's favorite dish but they did serve a delicious chicken pot pie that warmed me to my bones. My dad handed me another dose of medication for me to take with my meal so I could continue the tour of New York City without too much pain.

With our bellies full and our bodies tired, my dad suggested that we tour Central Park via horse drawn carriage. The ride took us all the way to Strawberry Fields, a John Lennon memorial. I got out of the memorial and without using my wheelchair, limped until I was standing in the center of the circle, right on top of the word imagine. It had been a life goal, and my dad snapped a picture so I could capture that moment forever.

After the carriage ride, we did something that Toby had been looking forward to; a helicopter ride around The Statue of Liberty.

Big head phones were placed over our ears that had a microphone attached to it so we could communicate with one another. From in the air we could see the beautiful Manhattan skyline, the Hudson River, and of course, Lady Liberty. The ground was frozen and the sun made the snow glimmer.

*

We arrived home around four in the evening. Everyone is already home. Bobby and Frankie were in the study using the computer in search of their own place, Melanie was working on homework with Denise and Daphne was practicing the piano.

"How was your tour?" Denise asked as we came in through the garage door.

My dad and she exchange a simple kiss before he answered. "I had a blast. We went to the World Trade Center Memorial, then Madame Tussauds, had a little lunch then went to through Central Park and ended with a helicopter ride to see the Statue of Liberty."

"Your day was packed! I wanted to go out to dinner but if Lennon is too tired we can always stay in," Denise said.

"I'm a little tired from the medicine but I'll be fine," I tell her as my stomach starts to rumble.

"Oh good! Everyone start to get ready, we'll leave in an hour! Lennon honey, you can wear something of Daphne's. You're both the same size."

I was confused on why I had to change again. To me, I looked presentable. I felt like I was dressed up enough, I didn't need to change into something dressier but Denise and Daphne thought different.

"This will look great on you," Daphne smiled as she came into my room with a few articles of clothing hanging over her arm with a small clutch tucked under her arm.

She helped me change out of my current outfit and into a purple printed, tight fitting dress that I wore over black leggings and a pair of my grey boots. Inside the clutch, Daphne produced jewelry.

"I bought these because I thought they were edgy but I could never pull it off," she said awkwardly as she handed me the multi-chain necklace and a three fingered ring.

"You can pull anything off, you just have to be confident in yourself," I tell her kindly.

"That is something I lack."

"What?" I ask amazed. "You're so pretty and smart and well rounded. You could do anything you want to. How are you not confident?"

Daphne shrugged before leaving my room to get ready.

I sat in the kitchen with Bobby waiting for everyone to finish getting ready.

"Graham called me before you got home and wanted to know how you were," he said breaking our silence.

"I'm so embarrassed," I rest my face in one of my palms.

"He told me that he provoked it. Asked you too many personal questions about that night and offended you. He wants you to know how sorry he is, he didn't mean to be such an ass."

"No, it's fine, honestly. I'm not one to share my feelings; I don't know what came over me. I should be the one to apologize. Graham probably thinks I'm pathetic."

"Nah, he thinks you're pretty cool, but it might just be the fact that you got shot. He's obsessed with that," Bobby laughed and so did I.

Dinner was expensive and elegant, but nice. I could see why we all had to change into something formal. I watched as Toby and Melanie interact together as they've known each other for years and I was glad how easy he was adjusting. I wish I could adjust that easy. I liked everyone, the family was nice and inviting but all six of them would never be able to compete with my mom, who I missed so much.