Suffocation.

It was the first Saturday of winter break. That meant many things, I could stop wearing the figure eight cast but my collarbone still had a few more weeks until it was completely healed. It also meant the tenth annual Abrams Christmas party followed by a more scandalous Christmas party that was hosted by Graham at his place.

The first party was in full swing and even though my collarbone was healing and I was given the green light for crutches, I was advised to stay off my leg as much as possible, so that meant that I was stationary for most of the evening. This also allowed me to get out of socializing, which Toby was forced to do.

Frankie kept me company in the kitchen for parts of the night. She didn't like parties like these. She said that they were too stuffy and nobody actually wanted to be here.

"Is Daphne coming to Graham's party tonight?" I asked her.

Frankie threw her head back and laughed. "You're serious?" she asked when she saw that I wasn't laughing.

"Yeah. I mean it can't be an age thing to why she's not going or I wouldn't have been invited. So what is it?"

"Daphne is a good girl. She doesn't go to parties or stay out late, besides she is the limited few that absolutely loves these type things."

"I think she wants to go. She asked me about it a few days ago and it almost seemed like she wanted me to invite her. Would Graham or Bobby be mad if I asked her?"

"Bobby might be a little worried just because that's his sister and it'll be new but Graham will love it. He'll get a kick out of it. Go ahead and ask her."

I waited until I spotted Daphne before calling her over.

"Want to go to Graham's party tonight?"

"What?"

"Yes or no. We're leaving soon."

Daphne thought for a moment. "Uh, yes."

I smiled devilishly. "Show me to your room."

"Why?"

"You're not wearing that. You look like a cat lady."

Daphne's bedroom was bigger than mine but it didn't have its own bathroom or access to outside. The walls were pale pink and lace curtains hung over the windows. Her closet was large and filled with great clothes that she never wore.

"This is what heaven looks like."

I pull out a few things then put back a few things. I grab a blazer, lace top, a hat and a bag before sifting through Daphne's jewelry.

"Here hold these," I tell her as I start to make my way out of her room and back downstairs.

Daphne follows me until my room and sits on my bed to watch me look through my closet. Finally I throw a pair of jeans at her and pick up a pair of shoes for her to put on.

"I don't look weird?" she asked as she adjusted the hat in the full length mirror she was standing in front of.

"No, you look so gorgeous. You look like you could kick somebody's ass."

"I'm not sure if I could in these shoes."

"Yeah, they were my moms. She had an obsession with high heels but couldn't walk in them to save her life," I say quietly.

"Thanks, Lennon," she whispers back to me.

Graham's small house, located on the edge of town, was packed with people by the time we walked through the door; it made it difficult to walk with the crutches.

Graham was already intoxicated by the time we made it through the crowd of people and found him. Bobby and Frankie had got stopped by friends of theirs so it was only Daphne and I so say hello. This is the first time since my melt down that I've seen Graham and I was still embarrassed.

"Freckles!" Graham shouted and it took a minute for me to figure out he was talking to me. "Who's your friend? Holy shit, it's Daphne!" He took us both into an awkward hug with my crutches digging into my side. "I'm glad you guys could make it," he said without letting either of us go.

"Yeah, I just wanted to apologize in person for my embarrassing behavior the last time we saw each other. I don't know what came over me," I said as Daphne and I pulled Graham off of us.

Graham gripped my cheeks with both of his hands and pulled our faces close together. For a fraction of a second I thought he was going to try and kiss me. "No. No, do not apologize. I was the asshole dick that made you cry, so I am sorry. You're a beautiful lady. I like your dress. It's very vintage and Little House on the Prairie."

His cologne, the alcohol on his breath and the cigarette smell was over whelming. "Thanks, Graham."

"Let me get you and Daphne a drink. I have beer, gin, and I think there is some vodka left. Pick your poison."

Daphne and I look at each other to exchange leery glances. "I don't drink and Lennon is on medication so she probably isn't going to drink tonight either. Thanks though," Daphne said in her soft voice.

"Yeah, we'll probably be the designated drivers for tonight anyways," I say with me.

Graham makes a funny say before talking, "Fine, be good Samaritans. I still love you though!" Graham kissed both of us on the top of the head before pushing past us to mingle with the rest of his guests.

Daphne and I found seats next to each other on the couch in the living room. I wasn't sure why I wanted to come to this party in the first place. I didn't know anybody here. I was glad that I talked Daphne into coming or I'd be sitting here alone, or worse, forced to mingle with Bobby and Graham.

Daphne and I were taking this time to bond and get to know each other better. A month living together and we still didn't anything about the other. Just as I was asking her how long she's been playing piano someone came up to us.

"Daphne?" we both looked up to see a guy with long, curly brown hair and a large nose standing in front of us with a crooked smile.

I see Daphne turn a bright shade of pink and begin to fumble over her words. "Oh my gosh Allen! What are you doing here?"

"Uh, my sister came into town and wanted to come here to see Frankie so I came along with but, but Frankie told me that you were here with your sister. Melanie's here?"

Daphne gives an awkward laugh and looks at me. I smirk because I've never seen her so flustered before. "This is Lennon and she's my step sister. Lennon this is my friend from school, Allen."

"Call me A.J. please, Allen is my workaholic father. So you're the girl that Daphne was telling me about, you and your brother came to live with your dad because you got in trouble at school? What did you do?"

"Actually two men broke into my house, killed my mom, shot me four times, and stole our things, that's why we're here. But thank you Daphne for starting a reputation for me at school. Now when I come into school with crutches they'll assume I'm a bad bitch they got into a brawl."

A.J. laughed and Daphne turned an even darker shade of pink.

"Keep my spot for me? I have to go to the bathroom," I say the A.J. as I get up, using my crutches for support.

While he was sitting down I winked at Daphne before leaving the living room. I didn't have to go to the bathroom, it was just getting too stuffy and I wanted some fresh air.

Graham had a small backyard. It was mostly concrete with a single tree in the corner of the lot. There was a grill and some old patio furniture to sit at. The air was especially cold and my coat didn't cover my legs but it dulls the subtle pain that is forming in my thigh. I breathe in deep and allow my lungs to freeze. I never thought that I would enjoy the cold and snow this much. I liked being out here, alone, looking up at the stars, and thinking that my mom was somehow one of them.

The door opened and closed and when I turned my head to see who it was, I saw Graham getting a cigarette to put in his mouth.

"Hey Lennon. Having fun?" he asked, seeming to have sobered up in the hour I've been here. I nod my head yes and make room for him on the beaten up couch so he could sit down beside me. "That's good. Look, I really do want to apologize about everything that happened."

"Its fine, Graham, really. I think I needed it."

"Well then good. If you feel like you need an asshole to ask you inappropriate questions then I'm your guy. You can call me anytime and I'll just ask away and make you cry until Frankie sedates you," he says and we both laugh. "But seriously, if you need someone to talk to that isn't family or has a medical license, call me."

"Thanks Graham. It means a lot to me."

"No problem, Freckles," Graham puts an arm around me and gently pulls me to lean on his shoulder.

We look up at the stars together until Graham finishes the last of his cigarette and we rejoin the party together.