Tainted Love

She knew, she had to have known. Why else would she say that to me? I had called her multiple times, but every time it had gone straight to her voicemail. Her car was parked somewhere, but I didn’t recognize the address, I suppose I could Google it, but right now I was more worried about getting ahold of Ary. I wanted to know why she was saying all of this to me.

If she had found out about the rape, and left, she wouldn’t be able to stay away. I would find her, and bring her home, back to where she was supposed to be, to where she and I could raise our baby together. We were going to be a family, even if it meant I’d have to make her submit to it.

“I’ll be back.” I walked out of the bus, and into the parking lot we were sitting in, we may have had a show tonight, but I wasn’t anywhere ready to settle down. I wanted to know where my girl was, where she was taking our baby, and why the hell her car was parked at an address I didn’t recognize. I opened up my phone before dialing a number quick.

”What?” I rolled my eyes. Johnny G. was a friend, someone who I knew would track down Ary for me.

“My girl ran. I need to you to go find out where her car is, and see if you can find out where she went. She’s only been missing for 4 hours.” I heard a grunt, and hung up. I texted him the address where her car was, and attached a picture of her, I knew Johnny G would find her. He was someone that liked to experience the darker side of life. The bar fights, the drugs, the things most people would never think to get into. He enjoyed going to jail, he thought he fit in well there.

I wasn’t too sure if he was really the type of person I wanted to track down Ary, but I still had a month of tour left, and I couldn’t justify canceling the rest of it, just so I could go track her down. The guys wouldn’t understand, well Jimmy might, but the others wouldn’t, they’d just tell me to forget about her. They’d tell me to let her leave, but I couldn’t, that was my baby growing inside of her. She would let me raise my child, even if it killed her.



I yawned, before looking at the GPS pulled up on my phone. Ryder was asleep in the passenger seat, and Button seemed to be resting in my stomach. I had stopped about 200 miles back and picked up some healthier food at a grocery store, I didn’t want to load up on junk food; it wasn’t good for Button, or me.

I needed to find a hotel soon, so I could crash out for the night, and shower tomorrow. I had to get plenty of sleep, I was already putting myself through enough stress by doing this move, and not knowing where I was going to go, I wasn’t going to put anymore wear and tear on my body. I needed to get plenty of sleep a night, I needed to make sure to shower, and brush my teeth, take my vitamins, and everything else. I needed to make sure that I stayed healthy, because if I did, Button should be okay.

I stopped at a rest stop, I needed to use the restroom, and stretch my legs for a moment. I was making good time, I decided that I would head to Missouri. I had always liked Kansas City, every time I had visited it, and I wanted somewhere that was a little larger, but was still pretty. Something that was safe too. I had looked at apartments there, months ago when I had moved out and found my own apartment, I couldn’t leave Shane then, but now I had to think of what was best for Button and I. I had already left Shane for California, now I was leaving Matt and Shane for Missouri.

I would eventually let Shane know what was going on. I’d have to, I couldn’t hide anymore from him, and I needed to have him in my life. I needed help. I knew he’d always be there for me; my biggest worry was just Matt finding me. If he was crazy enough to rape me, and then date me, I’m sure he was crazy enough to try and track me down. Especially since he knows this is his child, and not just mine. I’m sure he’s just the type of man that would have no problem kidnapping his own child.

I had thought about that for hours, he was crazy. Beyond crazy, and I just had to be the person that found out. I had to be hurt. I wanted him to hurt now; I wanted him to be the person that was suffering. I couldn’t think of any other way to make him hurt, than to run away. I knew that he would go home and see the nursery, and he deserved to know what he gave up, by hurting me. He didn’t deserve to see this baby, but he did deserve to know that he could’ve been a father, if he had been a good man, and hadn’t raped me. Maybe if he had just asked me out, like he did that second time, maybe he would’ve knocked me up then, not during a fucking rape.

That was probably what angered me the most, he had intentionally set out to rape me, then found me at the next concert I attended, brought me back stage, and then had sex with me. As far as I was concerned, Matt was the scum of the Earth, and if turned out Button was a little boy, I would make sure he grew up with the utmost respect for every woman around him. I’d make sure he was nothing like his father, and if he was, I’d make sure he paid for what he did to women.