Just Another Love Story

Everyone seemed to be having a great time, as Casey followed Johnny into the kitchen, where Jess and Bam were standing. She stood silently by Bam’s side, feeling a little overexposed but she would make an effort for her family.

The bald patch, where they had had to operate was obvious, since they had stapled her head back together, and now it was on show for everyone to see… and that scared her. Fear wasn’t really a big part of her way before the accident, growing up with Bam and the others, you kind of learnt that you have to take dangerous risks, in order for it to mean something.

Of course that probably didn’t make sense to a lot of people, but Casey understand and she had always followed it. Strange how one small thing like an accident, can bring that fear rushing back, and there was nothing she could do to change that.

Don Vito’s voice soon cut through her thoughts as Rake and Glomb arrived with a variety of pre-cooked food, including a whole pig with its head still firmly attached to its body.

“Where did you get all this?” Bam asked chuckling.

“Some restaurant in town, they were doing takeaway shit, so we thought what the hell,” Glomb replied.

“Did you have to kill babe in the process?” Casey whined grimacing at the pig.

“It’s just pork Casey,” Don Vito added.

“It’s like it’s watching us rip it apart piece by piece, and it’s creepy…,” Casey moaned gagging as Don Vito removed the pigs eye balls and shoved them in his mouth, “Eww, what the hell.”

Everyone laughed except mum-mum who hit Don Vito in the arm, and glared at Bam. It was all brewing, you could see it in mum-mum’s eyes, the anger was swelling, and it wouldn’t be long before she exploded.

With plenty of food, and alcohol flowing freely it wasn’t long before the first fight broke out, causing the atmosphere to suddenly change. Johnny stood beside her, with his hand on her lower back, as Steve-O and Novak were pulled apart by Bam and Pontius.

“You need to keep your hands to yourself,” Novak shouted as Bam struggled to hold him back.

“Like hell I will, you’re nothing Novak… just a washed up, druggie skater with no future,” Steve-O replied setting Novak off again.

“Brandon,” Casey said stepping in front of the guy she called her brother, “Come outside with me.”

Novak glared at Steve-O, but his features softened when his eye’s locked with Casey’s, and she grabbed his hand, pulling him outside. They sat side by side on the deck, the silence comfortable between them, and then Novak spoke.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, I don’t know Steve-O all that well, but I know you wouldn’t start here without a reason.”

“His right though isn’t he?” Novak mumbled looking at Casey who frowned.

“About what?”

“About having no future,” Novak said.

“I don’t think he was right, I think you could have any future you wanted as long as you stay clean… you’re not stupid Brandon and you know that.”

“It’s just hard to get my mind to believe it I guess, I’ve been stuck in that bad place for a long time, and no one really understands that…,” Novak began but Casey finished his rant for him.

“It feels like fear is drowning you, and no matter how much you push, you can’t seem to escape… it’s like being underwater and not being able to reach the surface.”

“Exactly,” Novak whispered staring at Casey in surprise.

“It’s all I’ve felt since the accident, this crushing feeling that won’t seem to ease, and nothing seems able to penetrate it. Occasionally my own thoughts scare me, and all I want to do is run, but my feet are like lead pinning me to the spot.”

“Why haven’t you told anyone about this?”

“There’s never going to be a good time to tell the people you care about, that you feel like you’re losing your mind… or that you feel trapped.”

“Guys, come on we’re about to eat,” Bam shouted from behind them.

“We’ll get through this together,” Novak stated hugging Casey who hugged him back.

They headed inside,where everyone was sat at various tables, and took their seats. Everyone chatted among themselves as they ate, laughter filling the air around them, but Casey was quiet and she could feel Novak watching her from across the table.

After their heart to heart, Casey felt a bit better about the night ahead, and dealing with her family. Picking at the food on her plate, Casey looked around the room at the people she considered family, and then she spotted Don Vito. She had never really gotten on with her dad’s side of the family, they were all a bit crazy if she was honest, and not the easiest people to talk to either, but family was family no matter what.

An hour later Ryan arrived with a girl who Casey recognised as his ex, and her heart sank. She looked over at Johnny who was staring at her, and gave him a small smile, which she knew was pointless. She slipped out into the kitchen, retrieving her tablets, and taking them. Johnny soon joined her, sitting on the counter behind her, and waiting for Casey to talk.

“Why would he bring her?” Casey asked turning to look at him with tears in her eyes.

“I don’t know babe, I’m sure he has a good reason,” Johnny replied moving forward to hug her as tears rolled freely down her cheeks.

“I actually thought that today was going to be okay, and now I don’t even want to be here.”

“Don’t let this ruin your entire night, I’ll leave you two to talk,” Johnny said as Ryan entered the kitchen and Johnny left.

“Happy Thanksgiving babe,” Ryan stated with a smile.

“Yeah… it’s really happy,” Casey mumbled.

“She didn’t have anywhere else to go, no one should have to celebrate alone,” Ryan explained.

“Loads of people celebrate Thanksgiving alone, but you don’t see me bringing my ex-boyfriends over.”

“That’s because your ex is crazy, and Bam would kill him if he came.”

“Seriously?” Casey said glaring at Ryan, “What are we doing Ryan?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve avoided me all day, choosing to hang out with your ex, rather than me… you left me to face all of this on my own.”

“That isn’t what happened Casey, I knew you had Bam and the other here for you.”

“I didn’t just want them Ryan… I wanted my boyfriend… I needed you here,” Casey cried, “Do you know how hard all of this is for me?”

“I know, and I’m sorry that I haven’t been around.”

“That’s just it though, you don’t know… and neither do they, because I didn’t want to dowse the positive flame that they’ve all been burning recently.”

“Then tell me.”

“I feel empty, like all the life I had is still back where I got hit… everything is dark and scary, but I have no way to get out of it,” Casey said trying her hardest to make her explanation clear, “I’ve always felt like an outcast… always wondered why I don’t fit… but now it’s just worse.”

“Casey,” Bam added causing her to look up and see Bam, Jess, Johnny, Raab and Novak standing there.

“I feel lost, like I’ve reached a crossroads, and every road looks as dark as the next. I don’t see the light at the end anymore… I don’t see anything… like I didn’t ever have anything to go towards… no future.”

“What are you talking about Sparks?” Johnny asked.

“I’ve been thinking, and I came to the conclusion that I wasn’t suppose to survive… I shouldn’t be here.”

“Don’t say stuff like that Casey… none of us care if you was supposed to be here or not, all we care about is that you’re here, and you’re recovering,” Jess stated, “Can we please just concentrate on that?”

Casey was silent, just like everyone else until Don Vito walked into the room, and the silence was broken.

“Yo your mum said it’s time for speeches.”

Everyone returned to the party, Casey’s words lying heavy on their hearts, and echoing loudly in their ears. Casey kept her distance, but soon enough all the boys had gravitated protectively towards her, except Ryan who stayed close to his ex, and wouldn’t even look in her direction.