You & Me.

John.

I could feel my heart beating out of my chest as I walked back and forth in the ER hallway at the hospital. I kept seeing nurses and doctors running in and out of the emergency room that Scarlet was just taken into. Every time I try to ask them about her, Halvo pulls me away.

“John. We just got here, they still don't know what to do. Just wait a little bit alright? Try to calm down.” He leaded me to the bench and I took a seat, burying my head into my hands. I let out a frustrated sigh, feeling like my head was spinning. “Come on, how about you go home? You're soaked and your clothes are wet, you need to change.” Halvo suggested but I only shook my head. I knew that I was still wearing my suit. The tie hung loosely from my soaked white shirt and my hair had a weird smell. I could use a shower to say the least, but I would never leave her alone. I could never do that.

“I'm not leaving her.” I simply answered, my voice above a whisper. I knew that Halvo was just trying to make sure I feel fine but I couldn't just leave her here and go home alone. I had to stay. I stared into the wall in front of me, sinking deep into my thoughts. Why did she do this? Why did she decide to throw herself from a bridge into the lake? Was I not satisfying her? Did she feel unhappy with me? I wish if I could let her answer all my questions right now. I didn't know what to feel exactly. Anger, confusion, sadness, frustration, worry. My hands were still shaking, I remember holding her cold, shivering skin out of the water; screaming and yelling for help. I felt weak, and helpless as I held what felt like her fragile body. I didn't know what to do. The tears stung my eyes as I forced them back, raising my head and spotting a nurse walking out of her room. I quickly stood up and walked towards her.

“Is she okay? Please. L-let me see her, please.” I begged as the nurse looked at me.

“She's still unconscious. We haven't figured out her state yet but we just did some X-rays and we will be observing them now.” She smiled tightly. “You can get in if you want to see her.” She opened the door, allowing me to step into the room. It was like every normal hospital room. Cold, depressing and only had a bed in the middle. I walked towards her, as I saw the heart monitor beeping to the rhythm of her heartbeat. I slowly lay next to her on the edge of the bed, wrapping my arm around her waist. Her hands were cold. I held them and squeezed them softly, as I heard her breathe.

“I need you here. Please wake up.” My voice was low as I whispered. I fought back the tears forming in my eyes, allowing them to close. I kept holding her hand, intertwining our fingers softly.

---

My eyes open to the sound of my phone. I quickly pull myself out of the bed as Scarlet still slept peacefully and I left the room.

“Hello?” I answered, rubbing my eyes, a yawn leaving my lips.

“John, uh hey. I went back home to get you some clothes. I was wondering, where did you keep your jeans again?” Halvo asked and I felt myself smile. I was lucky and grateful to have a great best friend who was always there for me whenever I needed him.

“It's in the cupboard by my bed.” I chuckled softly, answering him.

“Alright, dude. Do you want anything else?” He asked.

“No.” I answered, running a hand through my hair. “Hey man, thanks a lot for this.” I spoke sincerely.

“It's all good. That's what best friends are here for, right?”

“Right.” I smiled and hung up. I noticed that it was 3:30AM and as much as I wanted to go back to sleep, I felt the need that I had to stay awake for her this time. Maybe she'll wake up soon.

“Hey. I wanted to check up on her but noticed you were asleep. I didn't want to be a bother.” The nurse walked towards me, smiling.

“Uh- yeah I'm sorry about that.” I chuckled, rubbing the back of my neck. “So is she still in the danger zone?” I asked, hoping for an answer that would make me feel okay again.

“I'll just check on her now, and let you know about everything soon.” She nodded, and walked into Scarlet's room. I sat down on the bench facing the closed door, feeling anxious.

“Please just give me something that'll stop this pain.” My heart fluttered when I heard her voice. She's awake. I quickly stood up walking into her room. Made my way immediately and sat next to her. I pulled her hand, softly kissing it.

“Hey.” I whispered, cupping her cheeks. “How're you feeling darlin’?” I asked, feeling worried as I felt her cold pale face and shaking body.

“John.” She spoke, “Please tell them. I can't stand this headache. I need a pain killer or anything that would stop it. Please.” She begged me, squeezing my hand. I could see from her eyes that she was in pain, and I knew that it hurt a lot because she would never complain if it wasn't that bad. I turned my head towards the nurse.

“I'm sorry. We already gave her a medicine and we can't overdose. She needs some rest and she'll wake up feeling just fine.” The nurse smiled, and as I turned my head towards Scarlet. I noticed that there was no satisfaction in her eyes.

“Give me a fucking pain killer! Or any medicine that would stop this pain!” She pulled the nurse from her wrist and yelled through gritted teeth. I wasn't believing what I was watching, and I wished it was just a nightmare.

I ran towards her and tried to pull her away from the nurse.

“Come on. Calm down, Scarlet! Calm down.” I spoke trying to stop her. But there was no use. She only screamed at me and pushed me away. I was too shocked for words as I felt my entire body shaking. This isn't supposed to happen... None of this was supposed to happen..

“Sir, we're gonna need you to stay outside, please.” A huge group of helpers and nurses ran into the room as they all surrounded Scarlet. Even though I was ordered to leave, I saw everything. They handcuffed her wrists to the handles of the bed.

“John! John! Please help me. Let them take this pain away. John! Don't leave!” She yelled, trying to force them to let go of her but they were too much. Her eyes were filled with fear, anger and frustration all in the same time. I couldn't help it. I couldn't just stare at them doing this to her and do nothing. I begged them to let go of her, trying my hardest to tell them that she wouldn't do such thing again. Even though I wasn't sure of that either.

“We're sincerely sorry, we always do this to disobedient patients. Don't worry. You need to wait outside though, sir.” A nurse spoke through Scarlet's loud tantrum and pushed me out of the room as I stepped out. I could still hear her voice, yelling my name and wanting me to help her. I felt helpless & worthless. I leaned my head against the wall, tears bursting into my eyes.

“John?” Halvo stood next to me, a hand on my shoulder. “I- I got you your clothes. Is everything alright?” He asked and I wasn't even sure what to answer.

“Everything keeps getting ruined.” I spoke, running a hand through my hair. “I don't understand.. I just don't understand how every time things feel okay again, something bad has to happen. Why can't we just stay happy?” I whimpered, biting my lower lip, trying to force back the tears. I sat down on the bench, and felt Halvo taking a seat next to me. I kept my eyes on the floor. “I don't understand.” I said, my voice above a whisper. Burying my face into my hands, I let out a long frustrated sigh.

“John. Don't say that. Come on, things are alright. You're alive, she's alive. That's all that matters. And you need to remember that every time things like that happen, there are always better days.” He kept a hand on my shoulder. “You gotta have faith, man. Things will be just fine before you even know it.” I looked at him as he gave me a reassuring smile. I forced a smile and was distracted when I suddenly saw the doctor leaving Scarlet's room.

“Doctor, is-- is she alright?” I asked, my voice shaking. Feeling like my nerves were about to explode.

“She's okay. The reason she's been complaining about this severe headache is because it might be that she hit her head on a hard object or surface when she fell off the bridge. The headache is unbearable, which is why she reacted that way towards it. But we can't give her too many pain killers because it can be dangerous for her. But we injected her now, and she's back to sleep. She will be hopefully okay when she wakes up.” The doctor explained as he smiled tightly.

“God, thank you so much.” I sighed in relief. “Does this mean she'll be still having this pain for a long time?” I asked.

“We don't know yet. She might suffer with taking in what's happening around her. The process will be slower. She will feel some pain for approximately a week or so. All you have to do is give her that medicine. She will be back to normal in no time, hopefully.” He answered, “Good luck, son.” He readjusted his glasses on the bridge of his nose, smiled and walked away.

I retuned back to my seat. Thoughts taking over my brain. I knew that it will take her time to feel okay again, and I knew that I had to be by her side no matter what. I was praying to god that time passes by quickly and she returns back to normal in no time. But I knew that I'll need patience these days. I've always had it for her.