Everything Changed

Ronnie's PoV

You would think that having Ben Bruce around you all the time, and being clingy would be adorable, and you'd love it. But in reality it was probably one of the most annoying things ever. He was around me every minute. It was almost like having a stalker.

Here's how the last few days have gone.

We would wake up and get ready for the day and as soon as I left the bus he would follow. He would come to work at the merch booth with me and then drage me back stage to watch the show. Then we'd go back to the merch booth. There was not a minute where I was completely alone.

Meaning that I couldn't get my fix. That was probably the worst thing of it all.

This made me more irritable. Danny could tell I was drug sick, but he didn't do anything, just sat back with a smirk.

I had a plan though, to get away from Ben, and to get my drugs. It was probably a stupid plan, and I would probably regret it later, but I had on thing on my mind, one thing that mattered. One thing I'd do anything to get. Drugs.

"I gotta go to the store." I told Ben.

"I'll come with you." He said already getting up.

"No." I argued. "I'm not a child Benjamin, I don't need an escort."

"Yes you do."

"I really fucking don't. You need to stop. Alright? You're beginning to get annoying. And I don't have the time to deal with you. You're being all needy."

He looked shocked at my outburst but sat back down and held his arms up in defense.

"Fine. Have fun." He said. I rolled my eyes and walked out of the back room, only to be stopped by Danny.

"You're still hurting him." He told me.

"There's nothing I can do about it Danny. You should understand this more than anyone. I have bigger problems than having people worry about me." I said.

"Fighting with the one person you care about the most isn't going to help. What about that friend you have back home? Jackson. Or your wanker of a brother? How do you think they'd feel if they found out about this?" He asked.

"They just won't find out about it." I shrugged.

"You're going down a long and beat up road Ronnie." He warned. "But I'm not going to try to stop you. Because it won't work, but you do need to know the truth."

"I'm fine Danny."

"Just don't do anything stupid." He warned and stepped aside so I could leave.

"No promises." I said under my breath.

I walked down the unfamiliar streets until I got outside a bar. I looked around before taking out my phone and texting the guy who sold me stuff last time, wanting to know if he had any friends in this area. Luckily he did, and told me where I could meet them.

It was about a 10 minute walk before I got to tha place he told me to go.

"You Ronnie?" The girl standing there asked. I nodded.

"That's me." I said already taking out the money.

"You're a pretty girl, it's a shame you got into this." She frowned.

"I could say the same for you." I challenged. She shook her head.

"I just sell, the guy you bought from last time is my boyfriend, he roped me into helping him out. I feel bad afterwards though. I never know when I could be the cause of someone's death because of something I sold them."

"Then leave him." I offered.

"I can't." She said. I raised my eyebrows questioningly. "You ever been in love?" She asked.

"I have. I still am." I told her as Ben's face popped into my head.

"Then you know how hard it is to hurt the one you love. Or leave them. Or even do anything that could risk your relationship."

"I know better than most." I admitted.

"He doesn't like that you're doing this does he?" She asked.

"He hates it. I had to practically start an argument just to get out here tonight."

"Then why do you keep doing it?"

"Because it's an addiction. It's almost like breathing. When you take your first breath as a newborn baby you don't stop until you die. That's kind of how it is with drugs, alcohol, any of those addictions. You can try to stop breathing, but your brain stops you because deep inside you know that would be a stupid thing to do. With drugs your brain stops you from quitting because the addiction has fooled it into thinking that you need it to live." I explained.

"So, you know all of this, and you know that your mind is being fooled, and that it won't kill you if you quit. But you still do it anyway."

"It's harder than that."

"How so?" She asked. "What's your name?" She asked suddenly when I didn't answer.

"Veronica, but call me Ronnie."

"I'm Sarah." She smiled, then frowned again. "You still want this?" She held up the bag of cocaine.

"I don't want it, I just need it to carry on." I said.

"Isn't that from a song?" She asked.

"White Line Fever. Asking Alexandria." I told her.

"I love that band." She smiled.

"Me too." I laughed, feeling how ironic all of this was. "You coming to the show tonight?" I asked.

"Of course."

"Be sure to get some merch, I heard it's pretty epic." I said.

"Don't worry, I have money to spend, so I'm going to spend it." She laughed. "Here." She handed me the small bag, and I handed her the money. "I hope you figure your life out." She told me with a small smile.

"Me too. But you know how that usually works."

We said our goodbyes, but not really. I was going to see her later again tonight. She just didn't know that.

I looked at the bag that I had gripped in my hand.

"I've got the white line fever and an appetite for sin..." I mumbled.

-Back On The Bus-

I had decided to wait until everyone went out to get my fix. That and I didn't want to work under the influence of drugs. I might be an addict, but I'm more responsible than that. And I don't want to risk any more than I already have.

"Ben?" I called. He came out of the bathroom a few seconds later.

"What?" He asked with no emotion. It hurt. I know that I had snapped at him, and been a bitch for the last day or two, so I deserved it, but it still hurt.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, but I knew he heard me because his face softened almost instantly.

"You gotta stop doing this to me Ron. Stop fucking with my emotions. I can't handle it." He wrapped his arms around me tightly.

"I'm sorry." I repeated. "I really am. You're probably one of the best things that has ever happened to me, and I had to fuck that up."

"You didn't fuck anything up." He told me softly. "It's not your fault."

"But I fucked everything up Ben, I really fucking did, and now I can't fix it." I was fighting tears now, in realization of everything.

"It'll be okay." He said rubbing my back. "You'll be okay." I just shook my head.

"I'm addicted to cocaine, how will I ever be okay? I mean, I started a fight with you to go buy some, and I did, and now I can't do it because I feel bad. I shouldn't feel bad!"

"Why the sudden change in heart?" He asked.

"Sarah." I told him.

"Sarah?" He looked confused. When I didn't say anything he sighed. "Well thank god for Sarah."

"What's this? A hug fest? Can I join?" Danny asked coming into the room.

"Go for it Worsnop." I laughed.

-Before The Show.-

"I gotta go to work." I said and stood up

"We." Ben corrected, grabbing my hand. It was still kind of annoying that he was being clingy, but I was grateful at the same time.

There was already a line when we got there, a bunch of girls squealed when they saw Ben, which wasn't a surprise, since they usually do that. I couldn't help but feel annoyed when they flirted with him though. Especially since I was usually standing right there. They had no respect for themselves.

As we worked on selling everyone what we wanted, time seemed to fly by. I smiled when I saw a familiar face.

"Hey Sarah." Ben's head snapped up and he came to my side.

"Ronnie?!" She asked in shock.

"The one and only."

"I had no idea." She laughed.

"Sarah, like THE Sarah?" Ben interrupted. I rolled my eyes and nodded.

"Wait, how does he know me? Why are you back there? You know him? What is going on." I laughed at her confusion.

"We'll talk during before the show. C'mere." I pulled her around to where Ben and I were. "Ben meet Sarah, Sarah meet Ben. Ben, answer her questions and then you two talk while I deal with the fangirls who want clothes." I demanded and then went back to selling clothes.

Once I had gotten everyone in line what they wanted I turned back to the two who were sitting on the floor talking.

"Ben, can you get Sarah a lanyard? And meet us on the bus?" I asked sweetly. He nodded and pecked my lips before going to get one, understanding that I wanted her backstage with us.

"Why do I need a lanyard? Why are we going to the bus." She asked.

"You need one to get backstage." I told her with a smile. Her eyes widened.

"No way." She said.

"Yes way." I laughed and grabbed her hand and started walking to the bus.

I had a feeling things were beginning to get better.