Blind

Brusnop Oneshot.

There was something in the way Ben looked at Danny. Something magical, unexplainable, wonderful.

Ben looked at Danny like the sun shone from his eyes, like Danny was the center of the universe. Ben looked at Danny the way a child looked at the presents under the tree Christmas morning. Ben looked at Danny the way someone looks at their idol, their inspiration, their reason for living. Ben looked at Danny like he was the most beautiful, perfect, amazing person he had ever seen in his life.

And he was.

To Ben, Danny was all of those things. Danny was Ben’s absolute everything, his world. Danny was the best Christmas gift he could think of receiving, Danny was Ben's reason for living, he's Ben’s inspiration, his idol. To Ben, Danny was the definition of perfection. He was so imperfect, so flawed and troubled and pained, but he also wasn't.

Ben believed that a person's imperfections make them perfect. Ben believed that the pain and the past that Danny has come from, what he has bounced back from, only to come back a million times stronger from it, made him perfect. Ben knew that Danny was the strongest person he has ever met in his life; even if it took months, even if it took physically being unable to play a show for him to realise he needed help. When he realised that he couldn’t keep going the way he was going, he did everything in his power to make himself better, to fix what was broken.

Ben had never in his life admired someone more than he admired his best friend.

But it was so much more than that, than just admiring him. Ben didn’t just admire his best friend; he fucking loved him. He loved him far more than he should have ever let himself. Ben knew he never should have let himself fall in love with Danny the way he did, but it was unstoppable, unpredictable and downright fucked.

They had been best friends for so many years, they knew more about each other than anyone in the world, and they were closer than your average married couple for fucks sake. But that is all they were, two (closer than average) best friends, and they would never be any more than that. And that fact, well, that fucking killed Ben.

Ben would do anything for Danny to love him back. He would give up everything and anything to be able to call Danny his. Ben wanted to kiss him whenever the fuck he wants, hold his hand at every possible opportunity, go on random surprise dates, do stupid cheesy shit that their band mates would laugh at. He wanted nothing more than to be able to hold Danny close to him every night and whisper ‘I love you’, and have Danny whisper it back. It destroyed him every single day knowing that it would and could never become his reality.

But Ben is blind. Ben is so fucking blind. He looks at Danny, love, adoration and joy mixing perfectly in his eyes and sees perfection. What Ben doesn't see, however, is that Danny looks at him the exact same way.

Danny loves Ben with all his fucking heart. Ben is Danny’s reason to wake up everyday, his reason to stay sober before shows, his reason to continue having some kind of fucking control over himself. Ben is the reason Danny is alive; without Ben, Danny would surely have killed himself with all the drugs and booze by now. Ben was, and still is, Danny’s reason for fixing himself. Without Ben, Danny would be nothing.

Danny wants nothing more than to swoop Ben off his feet one day and proclaim his undying love for him the way they do in those rom-com movies they are always watching. He wants nothing more than for Ben to feel the same as well. It isn't just Ben that is blind. Danny can’t see the way that Ben looks at him.

It’s fucking stupid to be honest that they are so blind to each others feelings. You would think that after years and years of being best friends they would be able to tell. You would think, considering they know each other better than anyone else in the world they would be able to tell how the other was feeling. But no, because that isn’t how things work. Both are so sure the other only sees them as a best friend and nothing more that they refuse to acknowledge the passion, emotion and love they share.

The rest of the band has had enough. They are so sick of watching them pine of each other endlessly. They're so sick of watching Ben stare at Danny whenever the singer isn’t looking, sick of watching Danny look at Ben the exact same way when he isn’t looking. They are done with the two being so fucking blind.

That's why they've decided to do something about it. It was all Cameron’s idea. They were sitting on the bus, Danny and Ben next to each other on the floor of the back lounge, their backs against the couch. It was after a show, both boys were cradling beers in their hands, casting longing and love filled looks at each other every few seconds when the other would look away. The rest of the guys were on the couches behind them, and they could see everything.

Cameron had finally had enough: they had tried talking to them individually, tried to make them both see sense, only to be shot down continuously, pushed aside like they knew nothing when really, they knew everything. It was watching them occasionally catch the other staring, blushing, giggling and then looking back at the screen that pushed the guitarist over the edge. He pulled out his phone, and sent a message to both James and Sam.

To: Bawbag and Shorty.
Here, mates, I am so bloody sick of watching them make puppy dog eyes at each other, we have to do something or I will crack.
23.17

The drummer and bassist looked at each other, looked at Cam and then looked at Danny and Ben only to catch them once again locking eyes for a second before repeating the routine, look, catch, blush, giggle.

From Bawbag
Fuck sake, yeah we need to do something, but what the fuck can we do?
23.18

From Shorty
I have no idea; we can’t force them to admit it to each other. They re both so fucking blind its pathetic.
23.19

To Bawbag and Shorty
Why they fuck can't we? Just fucking lock them in here together, tell them that they aren’t coming out until they talk to each other? Say something like until you two admit the obvious to each other you’re not getting the fuck out?
23.22

From Bawbag
Fuck it, why not.
23.22

From Shorty
It could work. We might as well give it a fucking shot. Well done Cam, you might've actually thought of something smart for once.
22.23

James couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped him when Sam’s message came though to his phone, they were in a three way I-message, so anything said to each other could be seen by all three.

“What you laughing at back there ya twat?” Danny asked, tipping his beer back, gulping down the last of it.

“Ah, its nothing, just something on twitter. I'm gonna go get another beer, you want?” the drummer replied, setting their plan into motion.

“Yes!” “Get us one as well mate” came the almost simultaneous responses from the two sitting on the floor.

James just smirked, getting up and heading to the kitchen. Not even a second later Sam stands, saying that he is going to go and Skype his girlfriend, and not even a second after that Cam stands, announcing to the two that he was 'gonna take a dump’. How charming.

James returns a few minutes after, handing the two their beers before excusing himself, something about going for a smoke. The two on the floor are about to say they will join him, but they get the door to the back lounge slammed and locked on their faces before they even open their mouths.

“What the fuck?” they say, again, nearly at the same time.

“You're not getting the fuck out until you seriously fucking talk to each other. You both have shit to admit to each other, so until either of you have manned the fuck up, neither of you are getting out. We don’t give a flying fuck if you're in there all night, we don’t give a flying fuck if you have to pee in a fucking bottle. You’re not getting the fuck out.” Cam shouts through the door.

Both immediately flush red in embarrassment, because they do both have something to admit to each other, they're just too fucking stupid to admit to it or realise that the other feels exactly the same fucking way.

Danny coughs uncomfortably, while Ben just stares at the floor.

“Uhhh...” Danny starts, not sure what to say, he is confused, what could Ben possibly have to say to him that he wouldn’t just tell him? They tell each other absolutely everything. Well, almost absolutely everything. Funny thing is, Ben was thinking exactly the same: what could Danny possibly have to tell him?

“What are you hiding from me Dan? We don’t hide anything from each other?!” Ben blurts out, not meaning for it to come out the way it does. He regrets it as soon as he says it because he knows exactly what Danny is going to say.

“I could say the same thing to you mate! In fact I am, what are you hiding Benji?” Ben blushes again at the nick name, he loves when Danny calls him Benji, because is the only person who does, it’s a Danny thing. It makes Ben feel special.

“I-uh, eh, nothing, Dan," he manages to stammer out, convincing absolutely no one, not even himself.

“Bullshit. What’s going on Benji, we tell each other everything!”

And that, that's the final straw for Ben. He just can’t do it anymore, he physically can’t keep hiding how he feels, it's too much, and it’s killing him, ruining him. Tears well up in his eyes, his hand fly up to cover them as he pulls his knees to his chest and drops his face. His face covered by his hands onto his knees in seconds before he starts to cry.

Danny panics. Of course he fucking panics, his best friend, the love of his fucking life has just broken down into tears right in front of his eyes, it breaks his fucking heart.

“Shit, Benji, c’mere,” he rushes out, throwing his arms around his best friend's shoulders, pulling him close so that Ben's leaning into his chest, head still in hands pressed against Danny in the best way possible. Danny would relish in the contact and closeness if it weren’t for the clear distress Ben was in.

“Hey, c’mon Benji, talk to me! What's going on?” Danny asks softly, his voice barely above a whisper, but Ben hears him perfectly. He pulls away from his best friend's grip, leaning back against the couch again.

“I’m scared,” is all he says. And that, well, that just confuses Danny all the more - what does his Benji have to be afraid of?

“Why are you scared? What are scared of?”

“I’m scared… No, I'm fucking terrified that I'm gonna lose you, Danny,” Ben whispers, his voice hoarse and raw from crying. He has to hold back tears that threaten fall again as the words escape his mouth. “I’m terrified that if I tell you the truth, I’ll lose you, I couldn’t deal with that. I can’t lose you, please just let it go, Dan.”

“Not a chance, you are never going to lose me, I promise you Benji, I am not going anywhere, please, please talk to me,” Danny begs him.

Ben sighs, long and hard, mentally readying himself for what he is about to do; he is going o tell Danny how he feels. He is.

“Just, promise me you will let me finish? That it won't change anything?” he asks his best friend, who by the end of this, might not be his best friend at all, because even if he does promise, there is no guarantee that he wont run for the fucking hills.

Danny nods, his arms still wrapped securely around Ben.

“I never meant for this to happen, I never meant to feel this way. I promise you that, I couldn’t stop it Dan. I-I-I love you Danny. I am in love with you. I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I fell so hard for you Danny and I couldn’t stop it. I'm sorry, I never wanted to ruin this. I can’t lose you Dan, fuck, I need you, I don’t care if you don’t feel the same, just please believe me when I say this was never my intention. I can’t be without you.” He's crying again by the time he manages to get everything out, and Danny just stares at him, dumbfounded by Ben's confession.

“Please say something," Ben begs.

But Danny doesn’t, he doesn’t say anything at all. Instead, he leans forward and captures Ben’s lips with his own; he kisses him hard and passionately. Ben swears his entire body is on fire from the second Danny’s lips touch his own; he feels tingle shoot from his lips to his toes, spreading right to his finger tips. The feeling increases by ten fold the second he begins moving his lips in time with Danny’s.

Ben threads the fingers of one hand in Danny’s mop of hair and the other slithers around his back, pulling the vocalist closer to him. Their chests are pressed together, mouths moving quickly and perfectly in time with the others. Danny removes his arm from Ben's shoulder, moving it to cup the guitarists’ cheek, the other creeping down to Ben's hip. It wasn't in a sexual manner but purely just to be touching him. He rubs soft circles into the bone when Ben pushes his tongue forward, licking at Danny’s upper lip, begging for entrance. Danny doesn’t even hesitate to let him.

Ben moans when Danny pushes his tongue against his own, fighting him for dominance even though Ben had technically made the first move. The second the noise leaves his lips, everything changes, the kiss becomes frantic and passionate, even more so than it had been before. Ben lets Danny take control, allowing the singer to explore his mouth with his tongue all the while pressing circles into his hip.

Danny pushes Ben down, moaning as the guitarist pulls on his hair rather harshly, loving the feeling all too much. The soft touches that had been nothing but romantic and loving before turn heated and sexual. They continue kissing like this, heated and filled with lust and love until they physically can’t any longer, the short breaths they had been taking all the while slowly but surely no longer sufficing as they are forced to break away from each other.

They are panting, Ben had bent his legs so his feet were flat against the floor, his knees bent as Danny rested in between them, leaning forward and over him, one of his arms bent above Ben's head, holding him up as the other had moved from his hip to his thigh. Ben's own hands wandered as well, one was clawing at Danny’s back through his shirt while the other was trailing softly up and down his side, under his shirt, feather like touches, teasing Danny to no end.

“I fucking love you too and I have for as long as I can remember,” Danny breathes, still panting and so fucking turned on.

Ben doesn't reply; he just grabs Danny by the back of the neck and crashes their lips together again. There is not softness, no caress about this kiss. Oh no, this is a purely hormonal driven kiss. The air between the two is tangible. After years of being madly in love with each other and never having the guts to admit it, they can finally be together.

Unfortunately, they are interrupted by knocking on the door, followed by James voice. “Are you two okay in there? Have you sorted everything?”

They pull away from each others lips, smiling and smirking, both men’s eyes shining, filled with love, lust, adoration and passion, and for the first time ever, neither is blind.