Call Me a Thief

My body was thanking me gratefully as I stretched myself out upon my mattress. Niall was already snoring beside me, drool dripping out of his open mouth. Smiling lightly at him, I turned around a rested on my side, looking at the shadows on my walls. I should have most-definitely been asleep, but my mind was still reeling although my form was exhausted. After dinner, Niall and I just talked for hours while we stared out the city. Then we ran through the halls of that building like small children playing tag, until we were both so tired that getting back to my apartment to sleep was the only option left.

From the kiss on my forehead to him wrapping his arms around me (until he began snoring and flipped himself over), Niall was proving to be nothing short of perfect to me. It was awful to realize that his dent in my bed would only ever be one night old, but at least he was with me tonight, knowing it was our last. Sighing lightly, I reached for my phone on my nightstand, careful not to tug at the charger, and looked at the time. It was nearly six in the morning, meaning I had only about twelve hours before I had to go work, and only about ten until Niall had to board his plane.

Unlocking the phone and letting curiosity get the best of me, I opened my twitter app (even though I promised myself I wouldn't) and looked at my follower requests. There were hundreds, nearly a thousand. My eyes trailed along them, and occasionally I clicked on a few of the profiles, reading the tweets of the girls who jumped to conclusions about me (rightly so, judging by the photo of Niall and I leaving his hotel). A few girls were shockingly nice, making me smile warmly as I read their tweets defending me. I let those few girls follow, but ignored the rest of them, continually scrolling until my eyes spotted a blue, verified account.

It was Niall, his twitter handle resting neatly in my follow requests. With a grin, I accepted it and went to follow him. Deciding to follow the rest of the boys, I went to their profiles and did so, even though they all probably didn't even know I existed.

After I closed the app, I opened a browser and googled mine and Niall's names, wondering if anything would appear. Only a few relevant links did, containing nothing but photos of me with him walking down the streets and rumors. I looked at them in disbelief, feeling so very unreal at that moment. It was impossible to think that my face was on the internet in celebrity headlines, next to one of the biggest pop-stars at the moment.

That was me.

“Weird, isn't it?”

I turned to see Niall rubbing his eyes and squinting at my phone screen. “I didn't hear you stop snoring.”

Niall chuckled and grabbed my phone from me after unplugging it, rolling on his back and scrolling through the photos. Nuzzling into his side, I looked with him, still in disbelief that it was my face on those sites. The fact that they found out my name even was just insanely wild. Niall scrolled across one of the photos from after my audition, my face disgusted and horrified and his reassuring. We both began laughing instantly, and Niall saved that photo to my phone before sending it to himself.

“Don't save that one!” I squealed, trying to grab my phone back, but Niall just flipped over, holding his arms out and keeping my phone away from me.

“But it's my favorite! You look so great in it,” Niall teased, zooming in on my horrible facial expression and laughing even harder.

Hitting him in the shoulder, I snatched my phone back and put it back on the nightstand. Even though the photo was funny, I was pretty humiliated to imagine it being on the internet, let alone on his phone.

“Aw, come on,” Niall cooed, reaching for his own phone and opening up the camera. He turned on the light on the nightstand. “We can take a better one.”

He held it up above us and I snuggled into his side once more, a smile on my face as I looked into the camera. Niall took the photo and then showed me, and I was instantly more pleased. At least he would have a good picture of me on his phone to remember me by. A second later I heard my phone buzz, seeing that Niall had sent me the photo.

“I like that one better,” I stated, glancing over at Niall who was smiling at me.

“Me too,” he responded before giving me a quick kiss. “Now let's get some sleep.”

“Yes, sir,” I whispered as he turned off the light and wrapped his arms around me once more.

Niall pulled me closer to him, resting his chin atop my head as I placed mine against his chest.

I fell asleep to the beats of his heart, counting them instead of sheep.

••••••••••

“Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey!”

Stirring from my sleep, I grumbled incoherently and turned over, putting my pillow over my head to block out the sing-songy voice of Mackenzie, who was standing somewhere in the room. She continued her singing, and I could hear her walking across the room. The whiz of shutters being pulled sounded and I felt the light hit me. Next to me, I could hear Niall mumbling also, although his sounded a lot more friendly than mine.

“Breakfast?” I heard him ask more clearly. I felt his arm leave my waist, making me uncover my face and sit up.

I squinted my eyes, adjusting to the light and looked at Mackenzie, who was motioning out the door. She had a big smile on her face as she looked at Niall and I. Suddenly, the smell of the food hit me and I felt hungry. The one way to successfully get me out of bed? Food.

“I made breakfast!” Mackenzie chirped. “And I didn't burn it!”

“And it's edible!” I could hear Collin's voice ring out from the kitchen.

Niall rubbed his eyes and looked at me with a smirk. “Well, rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty.”

Glancing at the clock on my wall, I saw that I'd only slept about five hours, but it could've been worse. Yawning heavily and stretching out my arms, I swung my legs over the side of the bed. “I'm up, I'm up.”

“Sweet! Come grab a plate,” Mackenzie told me as she vanished out of the room and down the hall.

Running my fingers through my tangled hair, I stood up, walking across the room to grab an oversized sweater out of my drawer. I yanked it on and turned to Niall who was still sitting on the bed and rubbing his eyes. His normally styled hair was matted down on his forehead, giving him a sleepy look that made him about twenty times more attractive.

I watched as he got up and pulled on his jeans from the floor, a yawn escaping his system as well. He walked over to me and wrapped me in his arms, giving me a light good morning before moving in to kiss me.

“Ew, no,” I stopped him, lightly pushing him away. “I have morning breath.”

Rolling his eyes at me, he placed his lips against my forehead instead and took my hand. We walked out to the kitchen where Mackenzie and Collin were sitting and eating, talking about some girl they worked with who I've never met. I got two plates and handed one to Niall, filling mine with the pancakes, eggs, and bacon that Mackenzie had made.

“What's the special occasion?” I asked as Niall and I sat at the table.

Picking at her pancakes, Mackenzie shrugged. “Honestly, I have no clue.”

“The special occasion is... that I exist,” Collin told me casually, finishing up his breakfast and going back to get more.

“That's exactly it,” Mackenzie nodded and messed with her phone.

She turned her body away from us all and then held out her arms, taking a photo of herself with us in the background. Her smile wide, she took a few, making different faces in each.

“Selfies fo' days,” she sung to herself as she slid her phone across to me. “Pick a good filter.”

Mackenzie making me choose her filter for instagram was practically tradition. I picked my favorite and handed her the phone back. She turned to Niall and asked if he cared that she uploaded it and he shook his head in response before thanking her for breakfast. She just flashed him a flawless grin before turning back to her phone.

“So how long are you here, bro?” Collin asked Niall as he sat back down.

Niall glanced at the time before answering, “Only about five more hours, actually.”

“Oh,” Collin glanced at me, probably to see my reaction to his words, but I tried keeping my face unreadable.

After all, just because I felt heartbroken, doesn't mean I had to look like it. The world could be crashing down around me and I'd try my best to look unfazed; it was just simply habit after years of holding in my emotions and thoughts. Finishing breakfast, I cleaned up the dishes, putting them in the sink and rinsing them thoroughly so they wouldn't stink later.

Mackenzie and Collin cleared out of the apartment, having plans to go shopping even though their budgets should never allow it. Only minutes after they left, Niall told me he had to run back to his hotel and get his things together before his plane ride, a slight grimace on his face.

“Do you want me to come with you?” I asked, the selfish part of me not wanting him to leave my side.

Niall shook his head and sighed. “No, you shouldn't. I, um, was told I have to law low when it comes to hanging out with you, actually. The media is casting me in a bad light and management isn't too happy about it.”

Almost on cue, Niall's phone buzzed and he read the new email or text or whatever it was, his face growing uneasy. He typed out a quick response before looking back up at me. “I'm really, really sorry about it. It's my fault.”

“Will you come back before you go to the airport?” I asked, trying my best to fight the sudden and unwanted urge to cry.

I wasn't quite sure what caused the brimming tears and the burning in the back of my throat. Perhaps it was the fact that I let Niall somehow screw himself over with the tabloids and with his management, or perhaps it was because he felt like it was his fault for just being himself and doing things that any other person would've done. Or maybe it could just be that he was leaving and that meant there would be another hour or so that I spent without him. No matter what the reason, I felt utterly ridiculous and asinine and stupid for letting it get to me so much.

“Of course I'll come back,” Niall told me with a grin. He pulled me into a hug and held me tightly before pulling away and walking towards the door. “I just have to make a few calls and clear some things up. It's no big deal, I promise. This stuff happens all the time.”

“Okay, see you later then,” I replied with a smile, watching as he waved and left the apartment. As soon as the lock clicked, I felt the brimming tears escape and drip down my face, but I just wiped them away and sighed heavily.

There was no use in being sad yet. Not while he was still here and things were still okay... for the most part. Going to my room and gathering up some comfortable clothes to wear before work, I headed to the shower and got ready for the day, trying my best to save my energy for more important things. Once I finished one task, I moved to another, keeping my mind occupied with the mundane, rather than my own bottled up emotions.

After showering, doing my hair and make-up, cleaning up the kitchen, making my bed, and trying to engage my family in conversation via text, I was out of things to do, and it had been an hour and a half since Niall had left. I paced around the room, so confused on what there was to do anymore. I had spent so much of my life alone that it should've been second nature to me, but I was lost.

Laying down on the couch, I turned on the television and played a rerun of some old reality show on MTV, my eyes blandly watching the screen, but my mind in an entirely differently place. I kept counting down the minutes that passed, calculating how long I would have with Niall before he left. A part of me felt insane. After all, I had only known him for a few days, we'd only done so much as kissed a few times, and yet I was obsessing over our last moments together like they meant the world to me. And in an even more insane way, they did mean the world to me at that moment in time.

Whether it was healthy or not to be so attached to another person so quickly, it was how I felt and nothing would stop those feelings. If I truly was mental, then there was nothing I could do about it now. It was too late; I had already fallen too deeply for the silly Irishman. Even if he never came back or spoke to me again, the flutter of my heart and butterflies in my stomach would never go away every time his name was mentioned.

My rational side told me to get a hold of myself, that I was being entirely ridiculous and absurd. As always, that side was completely correct. However, I couldn't help myself when it came to lovely Niall and his perfect hair and perfect smile and perfect everything. My eyes darted to the clock again. If he came back right now, there'd be less than three hours until he had to leave again.

Interrupting my counting, my phone went off and I unlocked it, my eyes reading over the message quickly.

Sorry things are taking so long... lots of calls to make :( Be there asap

Smiling at my phone, I sent a quick reply to Niall, telling him to take his time although my number one instinct was to send "HURRY" with a million frowning emojis. A minute later my phone buzzed with a new text.

Just so you know.. this isnt your fault. No ones mad at us for being togethr, theyre just mad about how the media is taking it the wrong way but thats life haha

My eyes were glued to the word togethr, in all of it's misspelled glory, and I felt my heart rattle in my chest with each flutter. Although I wasn't sure exactly what Niall and I were, I felt like “togethr” was a good way to describe it. Because we were together, just not in a complete or traditional matter. Of course, a part of me still worried that once Niall left, he would truly leave and I wouldn't speak to him again.

I absolutely abhorred my pessimistic side.

Life is poop.

My thumb tapped to send the reply and I stood up, tucking it into my pocket as I walked back to my room. There wasn't any reason to go into the small area, other than that I had nothing better to do. Sprawling out onto my bed, I hugged my pillow close to me and closed my eyes, still feeling tired from being up too late with Niall. I knew tonight at work would be hell, but I'd deal with it and get a good night's sleep when I got off... something I really needed before my callback.

My stomach churned with nerves at the thought, and I felt close to puking up the breakfast Mackenzie had made. This was the farthest I'd ever gotten in my life with anything and the fact that it was my dream made it only leagues more surreal. If I messed this up, I'd never forgive myself.

Pulling my phone out of pocket, I looked at the new message from Niall, laughing out loud at his words.

Just don't flush yours anytime soon plz

I think the toilet bowl of life wants me to stick around a bit more, I told him, growing slightly embarrassed that my stupid text had turned into a full-blown metaphorical conversation about turds, of all things. Holding my phone to my chest beside my pillow, I closed my eyes again, feeling my thoughts slow and fade into a short slumber.

I awoke what felt like seconds later, but looking at my phone told me another hour had passed. There was a light knocking on the front door and two missed calls from Niall bright on the screen. I shot to my feet and rushed to the door, peeking through the peephole and seeing the astonishing blonde standing in the hall.

Pulling the door open, I let him in, fervently apologizing about missing his calls and telling him that I'd fallen asleep.

“I figured as much,” he told me with a chuckle, his eyes glancing down at his phone screen. “I didn't want that to take so long, I'm sorry.”

“It's fine...” I trailed off, the realization hitting me that Niall's flight left remarkably soon, meaning that this final visit would be incredibly short-lived. “Is... the car waiting outside?”

Nodding slowly, Niall bit down on his bottom lip and slid his phone into his back pocket, stepping forward to me and wrapping me into a hug. It felt like a ton of bricks had been dropped onto my stomach, the horrible pit making my breaths short and choppy. Not wanting our goodbye to be like this, I forced myself to inhale slowly, relaxing myself a smidgen before letting go of Niall.

He pulled me out into the hallway with him, and I knew he was cutting it close with having to leave to catch his flight. Yet he still remained, his hand holding mine tightly and his eyes looking at me sadly. I stepped forward, placing my arms around his waist and burying my face in his chest once more, this time taking in the way he felt and subjecting it straight into my memory. Shortly after, his arms wrapped around me in return and he squeezed lightly, the embrace lasting no more than a few seconds.

He pulled away and looked down the hall and at the elevator, before looking in my eyes one last time.

"Break a leg at your callback," he said with a smile, catching onto theatre lingo. "Goodbye, Cassidy. You can call me anytime you need someone to talk to, okay?"

I nodded and forced a small smile onto my face. "Goodbye, Niall. Be safe."

Just as the last word left my mouth, he grabbed my face and pulled me to his abruptly, his lips finding mine. This kiss wasn't like the one we shared in the skyscraper. There was nothing sweet or innocent about it. This kiss was desperate, our mouths working together fiercely as Niall pinned me against the wall of the hallway, his body pressed almost too tightly against mine. As our lips parted for the final time, he kept his forehead against mine and I could feel his breath brush against my tender lips.

“Please don't forget about me,” the words tumbled out of my mouth in a whisper, my voice so small that I'm certain he didn't even hear me. My eyelids fluttering open, I saw him staring at me intently, his blue eyes like mirrors, reflecting everything I imagined we could be.

“I won't,” he assured me, giving me room to get off of the wall.

He pulled me into one last hug before walking down the hallway. Leaning back against the wall, I watched him go, his long strides like stabs into my ribcage. It was impossible to think that this could be the last view I ever got of him, and it was of him walking away from me... walking out of my life as beautifully as he walked into it.

He got onto the elevator and his bright eyes caught mine. He waved lightly, just as the door closed.

And just like that, both he and I were gone.