These Words to Her

twelve

I was officially seventeen. And as I looked across the bed at Peter's sleeping figure, I hoped that it would be a better year. Not that being sixteen was absolutely terrible, but there were a lot of things that happened that ruined it for me, not to mention the fact that Brian and Michelle had been extra worse than normal this year. Not that they were ever enjoyable in the first place.

It had just turned midday and it didn't look like he was going to be getting up anytime soon, so I got off the bed, grabbed my phone from the bedside cabinet and left the bedroom. I bypassed the kitchen and sat on the sofa instead, pulling the blanket that he kept hanging over the back across my bare legs. Unlocking my phone, I saw that I had five missed calls, twelve messages and many notifications from social media, the latter being entirely full of birthday wishes from my friends. The missed calls were all from Hannah bar the latest one which was from Michelle. The messages, however, were mostly from Michelle, with Brian making up two of them and Hannah having sent the last one. But as I scrolled through them, I realised that they all still thought I was locked in my room. That was absolutely great.

Deleting all the missed calls from my log, I locked my phone and chucked it on the sofa, not bothering to watch where it went. I wish I could see Brian's face when they realise that I'm not in my room and actually haven't been there since last night. I had phoned Peter the moment I'd locked my door and within half an hour, my bag was packed, I had written a short note for them to find and was waiting for him to make the drive to the next street over. I had then left through my window, even though I had broken my arm when I was thirteen after attempting to sneak out and falling from the ledge after losing my grip. The thing was, I had been formulating a plan ever since talking to that girl at the retreat, and the plan I had come up was simple: get under Michelle or Brian's skin so much that I proved them wrong before making them face the fact that they had not been the best parents they could have been. Of course, Hannah seeing was not part of my plan and I knew it would make everything worse - not worse for me, but for Michelle.

Not even a minute after I had put my phone down did it start ringing obnoxiously. Luckily it was Leah so I answered it. "Hey you," I said.

"You're finally seventeen! How does it feel?" she exclaimed.

"Not that much different than yesterday. Although you'll never guess where I came back from yesterday."

"Ooh, where?"

I leaned my head back and twirled a piece of hair around my finger. "A family retreat."

She burst out laughing. "No shit, you're kidding," she said.

"I'm not. Michelle's sister suggested it because apparently I needed to 'reconnect' with them. I won't even get into the therapy sessions we were forced into while there," I replied, running my hand through my hair.

"I wish I was there. That would have been great to see."

"You're lovely, you know that?"

I could almost see her grin from here. "I try. Anyway, I phoned for an update on how you are. So, any gossip?"

"Well, I might not be at Brian and Michelle's right now," I trailed off, hearing her cough down the line.

"How did Hannah let you come back?"

On the small table in front of the chair, I spotted an envelope and with a small stretch I managed to get hold of it and look at the front. It was for me. As I felt it I realised there was something in it so I rested it on my lap while I spoke, not wanting to be on the phone when I did open it. "She didn't. I left. Peter came and got me and I left last night."

"Can you do that?" she questioned. She knew about me being made to go to their house, courtesy of all the times when I used to message her to express my hatred for being there with absolutely nothing to do, but she also knew that I had to endure it every summer without fail.

I sighed. "According to Hannah? No. According to Brian and Michelle? No. According to myself? I can."

There was some noise in the background before I heard a voice close to the phone speak to her. I couldn't hear all the words so I waited for Leah to reply, and she did after a minute. "Listen, I have to go. You know how expensive it is to make an international call, at least that's what my dad just said. I'll catch up with you later?" she said before hanging up after we both said goodbye. That conversation just made me miss her more than I already did. I can't wait for her to come back.

After putting my phone back down, I picked up the letter in my lap and slid my finger beneath the seal. To be honest, I was a little nervous about what it would say. Clearly, it wasn't a birthday card and I was proved right when I pulled out a letter from inside. As I pulled it out, the ring I knew he was going to give me sometime soon fell out with it. My promise ring. I had thrown it back at him during an argument a little while before summer and hadn't taken it back since. We had argued about that as well.

I looked at the ring for a few moment before slipping it onto my finger. Although I do think he will take it back once he discovers my actual age, as well as all the lies I have told him, but I honestly didn't think I had the courage to confess to him. No matter how much we argued, I didn't want to lose him.

"What you doing?" His voice startled me from how close it was. He joined me on the sofa, automatically looking at the ring. "You're wearing it," he said, a smile on his face.

I shrugged, playing with it. "Yeah, I guess it was time I stopped being so childish."

He nodded. "Have you read the letter?"

"Not yet."

"Good," he said, snatching it from my hands. "I don't want you to read it until tomorrow. I know I wrote it for your birthday but just trust me, okay?" I nodded, not too bothered about having to wait one more day. It wasn't like I was going to be going anyway, no matter what Hannah said.

I'm no longer going to be pushed around.
♠ ♠ ♠
I know it doesn't seem important. But trust me.