Diary of an Obsessive-Compulsive Blonde
Chapter 5: The Infamous Hair Flip
8:14 October 23, 2007
My closet
Dear Diary,
Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Okay, sorry, I'm calm now. Sort of.
Oh. My. God. You will never guess what happened today after school! Well, sorry, but you're going to have to wait until after I tell you how the rest of my day went. I know; I'm evil.
So, at the beginning of lunch, as Amber, Danielle, and I walked into the cafeteria, some guy suddenly yells, "Hey! Danielle! Come here!"
I noticed Danielle's face turn bright red as she turned around and practically ran over to the guy's table. Amber and I exchanged disbelieving looks, and followed Amber over to one of the "popular" tables. As we neared the guy, we saw why Danielle had been so eager to come over. He is quite possibly one of the hottest guys I've ever seen. He has short blonde hair and an amazing body.
"Hi, Liam," Danielle said in a weird high-pitched voice.
"Hey, Danielle. So, do you want to meet after school to work on the French project?"
"Yeah!" Danielle exclaimed a little too enthusiastically, "I mean, yeah, I suppose that would be alright. Is the library fine?"
"Yeah. I'll see you then?"
"Sure," Danielle said breathlessly before walking away, her eyes glazed over.
Amber and I grabbed her and pulled her away to interrogate her.
"Who is he and what has he done to you?" I asked her, grabbing her shoulders.
"Liam Reed," Danielle told me dreamily, "The most amazing guy I've ever met. He's practically perfect! He plays varsity baseball and has the most amazing abs. I'll show you the picture of him with his shirt off on his Myspace! I look at it everyday…"
"Stalker!" I coughed.
"Hey! You can't talk! Who's the one who wrote, 'Mrs. Luke Lyons' all over her English notebook?" Danielle exclaimed.
"True," I muttered.
"So, you've been working this guy, haven't you, Dani?" Amber asked.
"Er, well, you know I get really shy around guys, especially ones I like…"
"Danielle!" Amber and I exclaimed.
"Look, we'll help you, it's really not that hard," Amber told her.
We began walking toward our lunch table and giving Danielle flirting tips:
"Make eye contact," Amber told her.
"Smile and let him know you're interested," I added.
"Periodically touch him on the arm or something."
"Laugh at all his jokes, even if they're really stupid."
"Tell dirty jokes."
"Do the hair flip."
"What's the hair flip?" Danielle asked as we sat down.
"You don't know what the hair flip is?!" Amber and I exclaimed.
"Watch me," I instructed Danielle.
I walked over to Parker and sat down on his lap.
"Hey, baby," I told him.
"Wh-what?"
"I just wanted to thank you for carrying me to the nurse's office. No guy has ever done something that nice for me," I said.
"Uh, yeah, your welcome," Parker said, a huge grin spreading onto his face.
"So, I'll see you tomorrow, then?"
"Yeah. Can't wait."
"Me neither," I said, and winked.
I stood up, my back to him, then flipped my hair around, facing him. I waved and said, "Bye-e."
As I walked back to the table, I could feel his eyes, and the eyes of every guy at that table watching me. When I sat down and looked back, my suspicions were confirmed. Even Brianna was looking at me, glaring. I smirked and turned back to face my friends, who were staring at me with admiration.
"That was brilliant, Barbie, I give you a 9.2," Kaycie said, herself an accomplished flirt.
"You came on a bit strong, but it definitely worked. I'd give you a 9.0," Annie added.
"Taking into consideration that the object of flirtation was an A-list movie star, twice named People's Hottest Man in America, who hangs out with the likes of Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton, and that I have a poster of him above my bed, I don't think my comrades give you enough credit. I'd give you a 9.8," Gabriela said.
"Thank you, thank you very much," I said, taking a bow.
"See, I could never, in a million years do that. Not even to Jacob Christiansen," Danielle moaned, pointing to Amber's weird lab partner, who was sitting by himself the table over, talking to himself and playing with his potato salad.
"Yeah, well, neither could I, he creeps me out," Amber said.
"Ugh, I'm a failure! I'm going to end up an old spinster with a gazillion cats. I'm going to be a 90-year old virgin!"
"Oh, no, honey, you won't," Gabriela said.
"Look, it's really not that hard. Don't stress out about it too much. Just go with the flow. It's really pretty instinctive," I told her.
"Don't worry, we'll help you out," Amber said.
"Thanks, guys," Danielle said, giving us a small smile.
"I'll do some research on this guy, too," Amber said.
"Uh, okay, I guess," Danielle agreed.
The rest of the school day was uneventful. Not much happened until after school. As soon as the bell rang, I said goodbye to my friends and walked to the bus stop down the street. I rode the bus to downtown L.A. and walked a few blocks to the CD store where I work.
After I grabbed my name tag, walked over to the counter next to Luke.
"Hey Barbie," Luke said while scanning a CD.
"Hi, Luke! What's up?" I returned breathlessly.
"Not much. Listen, I got tickets for this Slipknot concert on Friday, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me," he said, looking me in the eyes.
My eyes widened and for a minute I was speechless. The guy of my dreams had just asked me out! Now do you see why I'm so happy?
"Y-yeah, totally. I love Slipknot," I answered.
Okay, so I really hate Slipknot. But a little white lie never hurt anyone, right?
"Cool. So, I'll pick you up Friday night at 7?" Luke said.
"Yeah. Can't wait," I replied, barely containing my joy.
For the rest of our shift, we talked constantly, mostly about music. He's more into heavy metal, whereas I'm more into indie rock, but I never let on that I really hate screamo. After work, Luke gave me a ride back to my apartment on his motorcycle. As soon as I got home I three-way called Amber and Danielle and excitedly told them the news.
"Oh my God you guys! You will never guess what just happened!" I told them eagerly.
"Umm, I dunno, Britney Spears was finally admitted to an insane asylum?" Amber asked sarcastically.
"No, not yet, but Luke just asked me out!" I shrieked.
"Oh my God! That's awesome Barbie!" Danielle said.
"Wow, you've finally accomplished your life goal. Whatever are you going to do with yourself now?" Amber asked.
We all laughed and I said, "Oh, shut up! Gosh, I can't believe this! I never thought he would actually ask me out!"
"Well, it's not that surprising, I mean, you were really putting yourself out there," Amber said, snickering.
"Shut up loser! You guys totally have to come over before the date and help me get ready!" I ordered them.
"Of course, Barbie, what are friends for?" Danielle said.
"Oh yeah, Danielle, I forgot to ask, how did that study session with Liam go?" I asked.
"Really good. We talked a lot." Danielle said.
"Did you flirrrt?" Amber asked.
"Well, I tried, but-"
"No buts. Tomorrow we're going to help you snag this guy. Okay?" Amber said.
"Uh, okay," Danielle said meekly.
"Okay girlies, I have to go eat dinner, but oh my God I still can't believe this is actually happening!" I exclaimed elatedly.
We all shrieked happily and hung up. So anyways, I told my mom at dinner and she was as happy for me as Amber and Danielle. After all, they had all been on the receiving end of my many soliloquies about how amazing Luke was and my many rants about why he wouldn't ask me out already. So now I'm in my closet, writing this diary entry and petting Elvis, who is happily purring in my lap. You know, I think I'll go do some homework. Not math homework though. I have to draw the line somewhere.
Hugs and Kisses,
Barbie
My closet
Dear Diary,
Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Okay, sorry, I'm calm now. Sort of.
Oh. My. God. You will never guess what happened today after school! Well, sorry, but you're going to have to wait until after I tell you how the rest of my day went. I know; I'm evil.
So, at the beginning of lunch, as Amber, Danielle, and I walked into the cafeteria, some guy suddenly yells, "Hey! Danielle! Come here!"
I noticed Danielle's face turn bright red as she turned around and practically ran over to the guy's table. Amber and I exchanged disbelieving looks, and followed Amber over to one of the "popular" tables. As we neared the guy, we saw why Danielle had been so eager to come over. He is quite possibly one of the hottest guys I've ever seen. He has short blonde hair and an amazing body.
"Hi, Liam," Danielle said in a weird high-pitched voice.
"Hey, Danielle. So, do you want to meet after school to work on the French project?"
"Yeah!" Danielle exclaimed a little too enthusiastically, "I mean, yeah, I suppose that would be alright. Is the library fine?"
"Yeah. I'll see you then?"
"Sure," Danielle said breathlessly before walking away, her eyes glazed over.
Amber and I grabbed her and pulled her away to interrogate her.
"Who is he and what has he done to you?" I asked her, grabbing her shoulders.
"Liam Reed," Danielle told me dreamily, "The most amazing guy I've ever met. He's practically perfect! He plays varsity baseball and has the most amazing abs. I'll show you the picture of him with his shirt off on his Myspace! I look at it everyday…"
"Stalker!" I coughed.
"Hey! You can't talk! Who's the one who wrote, 'Mrs. Luke Lyons' all over her English notebook?" Danielle exclaimed.
"True," I muttered.
"So, you've been working this guy, haven't you, Dani?" Amber asked.
"Er, well, you know I get really shy around guys, especially ones I like…"
"Danielle!" Amber and I exclaimed.
"Look, we'll help you, it's really not that hard," Amber told her.
We began walking toward our lunch table and giving Danielle flirting tips:
"Make eye contact," Amber told her.
"Smile and let him know you're interested," I added.
"Periodically touch him on the arm or something."
"Laugh at all his jokes, even if they're really stupid."
"Tell dirty jokes."
"Do the hair flip."
"What's the hair flip?" Danielle asked as we sat down.
"You don't know what the hair flip is?!" Amber and I exclaimed.
"Watch me," I instructed Danielle.
I walked over to Parker and sat down on his lap.
"Hey, baby," I told him.
"Wh-what?"
"I just wanted to thank you for carrying me to the nurse's office. No guy has ever done something that nice for me," I said.
"Uh, yeah, your welcome," Parker said, a huge grin spreading onto his face.
"So, I'll see you tomorrow, then?"
"Yeah. Can't wait."
"Me neither," I said, and winked.
I stood up, my back to him, then flipped my hair around, facing him. I waved and said, "Bye-e."
As I walked back to the table, I could feel his eyes, and the eyes of every guy at that table watching me. When I sat down and looked back, my suspicions were confirmed. Even Brianna was looking at me, glaring. I smirked and turned back to face my friends, who were staring at me with admiration.
"That was brilliant, Barbie, I give you a 9.2," Kaycie said, herself an accomplished flirt.
"You came on a bit strong, but it definitely worked. I'd give you a 9.0," Annie added.
"Taking into consideration that the object of flirtation was an A-list movie star, twice named People's Hottest Man in America, who hangs out with the likes of Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton, and that I have a poster of him above my bed, I don't think my comrades give you enough credit. I'd give you a 9.8," Gabriela said.
"Thank you, thank you very much," I said, taking a bow.
"See, I could never, in a million years do that. Not even to Jacob Christiansen," Danielle moaned, pointing to Amber's weird lab partner, who was sitting by himself the table over, talking to himself and playing with his potato salad.
"Yeah, well, neither could I, he creeps me out," Amber said.
"Ugh, I'm a failure! I'm going to end up an old spinster with a gazillion cats. I'm going to be a 90-year old virgin!"
"Oh, no, honey, you won't," Gabriela said.
"Look, it's really not that hard. Don't stress out about it too much. Just go with the flow. It's really pretty instinctive," I told her.
"Don't worry, we'll help you out," Amber said.
"Thanks, guys," Danielle said, giving us a small smile.
"I'll do some research on this guy, too," Amber said.
"Uh, okay, I guess," Danielle agreed.
The rest of the school day was uneventful. Not much happened until after school. As soon as the bell rang, I said goodbye to my friends and walked to the bus stop down the street. I rode the bus to downtown L.A. and walked a few blocks to the CD store where I work.
After I grabbed my name tag, walked over to the counter next to Luke.
"Hey Barbie," Luke said while scanning a CD.
"Hi, Luke! What's up?" I returned breathlessly.
"Not much. Listen, I got tickets for this Slipknot concert on Friday, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me," he said, looking me in the eyes.
My eyes widened and for a minute I was speechless. The guy of my dreams had just asked me out! Now do you see why I'm so happy?
"Y-yeah, totally. I love Slipknot," I answered.
Okay, so I really hate Slipknot. But a little white lie never hurt anyone, right?
"Cool. So, I'll pick you up Friday night at 7?" Luke said.
"Yeah. Can't wait," I replied, barely containing my joy.
For the rest of our shift, we talked constantly, mostly about music. He's more into heavy metal, whereas I'm more into indie rock, but I never let on that I really hate screamo. After work, Luke gave me a ride back to my apartment on his motorcycle. As soon as I got home I three-way called Amber and Danielle and excitedly told them the news.
"Oh my God you guys! You will never guess what just happened!" I told them eagerly.
"Umm, I dunno, Britney Spears was finally admitted to an insane asylum?" Amber asked sarcastically.
"No, not yet, but Luke just asked me out!" I shrieked.
"Oh my God! That's awesome Barbie!" Danielle said.
"Wow, you've finally accomplished your life goal. Whatever are you going to do with yourself now?" Amber asked.
We all laughed and I said, "Oh, shut up! Gosh, I can't believe this! I never thought he would actually ask me out!"
"Well, it's not that surprising, I mean, you were really putting yourself out there," Amber said, snickering.
"Shut up loser! You guys totally have to come over before the date and help me get ready!" I ordered them.
"Of course, Barbie, what are friends for?" Danielle said.
"Oh yeah, Danielle, I forgot to ask, how did that study session with Liam go?" I asked.
"Really good. We talked a lot." Danielle said.
"Did you flirrrt?" Amber asked.
"Well, I tried, but-"
"No buts. Tomorrow we're going to help you snag this guy. Okay?" Amber said.
"Uh, okay," Danielle said meekly.
"Okay girlies, I have to go eat dinner, but oh my God I still can't believe this is actually happening!" I exclaimed elatedly.
We all shrieked happily and hung up. So anyways, I told my mom at dinner and she was as happy for me as Amber and Danielle. After all, they had all been on the receiving end of my many soliloquies about how amazing Luke was and my many rants about why he wouldn't ask me out already. So now I'm in my closet, writing this diary entry and petting Elvis, who is happily purring in my lap. You know, I think I'll go do some homework. Not math homework though. I have to draw the line somewhere.
Hugs and Kisses,
Barbie