The Bond of Brothers

The emergency room at County General was always in a state of ensuing chaos. Something was always going on or breaking down. Make it a weekend night and it would make a person believe that Armageddon had come. Julia Martin was always used to that. She thrived on it. She was a damn good ER nurse and the chaotic madness only pumped her full of energy. She loved the constant drama. Tonight....she was about ready to scream. “I’m so damn bored.” She groaned. “It’s a storming Saturday night! Even the drunks aren’t out tonight.”

“You’re one scary chick.” Mark Kessler spoke up from behind the nurses’ station. He grinned up at her with his sweet crooked smile. “It’s actually quiet for a damn change and you’re bitching about it?”

“I’m just borrrreeeedddd.” She whined, leaning over the desk. “Can’t I just go home? Call me if there’s a major catastrophe like a bus wreck.”

“I bet you get off on those autopsy shows.”

“Cover for me, please.” She flashed him a warm smile. There was just no way he could say no to her. “Just page me if something comes up. It’s not like you need me....”

“We’ve got a car wreck victim coming in.” Dr. Woo startled them as she burst through the doors into the emergency room. Mark and Julia straightened up quickly pretending like they had really been working instead of flirting. Dr. Maggie Woo could have cared less and ignored them as she made her way to the exit doors where the ambulance would be coming through. “I’ve already talked to Dr. Patton. Dr. Walker will be assisting.”

“We know how bad yet?” Mark switched into professional gear and helped the doctor prepare an examination table. Julia made sure the correct instruments were available and double checked the monitors to make sure there were no glitches.

“Massive head injury. Internal bleeding. Medic said his vitals are failing and they’re pulling out all the stops to keep him alive.”

“Family been contacted?” Julia asked.

“Got Holly working on that as we speak.” Maggie stared past her towards the door. Flashing lights could be made out. “Looks like he’s a local boy.” The flashes of red grew distorted through the glass panels of the door. A familiar face came barreling through the door as he shouldered them open. He didn’t feel like wasting time waiting on someone to open them for them. The rookie, she recognized as a kid named Alex, continued to perform CPR.

“He coded just before we got here.” Paul told Maggie as Alex finally pulled away to allow the medical team access to Patrick. “Dr. Patton the miracle God here yet?”

“You know he hates it when you call him that.” Maggie scolded. “What happened to....”

“Patrick Stump.”

“Mr. Stump. One vehicle accident?”

“Looks that way.” Paul stepped back.

“He’s not going to make it.” Alex said to himself, but Paul heard him. He jumped slightly when Paul gripped his shoulder.

“Come on.” Paul ordered gently. With little effort, he guided his young charge further away. The kid was still very fresh and new to all of this. He hadn’t yet been inducted into the harsh reality of death and wasn’t ready for it.

Alex glanced behind him once more before the doors closed behind them. “Does this ever get any easier?”

“Some parts do.” Paul answered. Alex paused by the open back doors of the ambulance. His eyes fell down on the puddle of blood that darkened the floor. Paul tried to ignore it. “It’s always shocking when someone so young dies. It breaks your heart when you have to tell a parent a child is dead. That’s the kind of shit you never get used to. But it would be worse if you did. Then that would mean you are dead inside.”

“You’re not helping me here, Paul.”

“I’m sorry, Alex. “ He understood what the kid was going through. His first month on the job was pure hell. He still had days that gave him nightmares. “We do what we can. Sometimes we win. We’re the only thing standing between life and death for a lot of people. So, we’re needed. Those doctors can’t save his life if we hadn’t have done what we did.”

Alex smiled slightly and finally turned away from the vehicle. “We did keep him alive.”

“Damn right we did.” Paul walked around to the side and leaned against the side of the Hayne’s ambulance. “That wreck, man. He shouldn’t even be alive. He should have died on impact. That’s one stubborn bastard with a determination to live.”

“So you think he’ll pull through?”

Paul sighed as he lit up a cigarette. “He’ll give Death a real fight. Whether it will be worth it, who knows.”

Alex hoped he was right. Without another word, he walked to the passenger side. It was a little past midnight. Quitting time. God knew he had had enough for one night.

******************************
The sound of the heart machine and the whoosh of the air compressor kept the silence from completely devouring the small hospital room and its inhabitants. Just like cruel Death had sought to swipe the life from Patrick, eerie Quiet tried to dampen the hope his family and friends clung to. Patrick would not die. He would wake up. If there was a God, and they all believed that He existed, then Patrick would be spared and returned to them.

“He’s a fighter, Patricia.” Ann said.

“He looks so small.” His mother tried to be strong, but her voice cracked from the pressure brought on by the crashing waves of emotions. Terror and grief battled with faith and love. “He’s too young. It’s not fair.”

Elise echoed her mother-in-laws feelings but remained quiet. She sat by her husband’s side holding onto his left hand, careful to not pull the IV out. Gauze of white concealed most of his head and face. What she could see of Patrick’s face was made up of a mass of black and blue. A long tube parted his lips and forced oxygen into his lungs, feeding his vital organs. Her brown eyes were a constant shimmering pool of unshed tears. To let herself cry would be an admission of defeat; and Patrick needed all her strength not her sorrow.

She glanced up at her husband Mark and Matthew, who clung to his brown leather bomber jacket. The small little boy wasn’t even six months old, but he seemed to gaze down at his father with awareness far beyond his tender age or even hers. He had cried only once when they first arrived. The man stretched out before him did not resemble his father. Not even the slightest.

“I better take him home.” Mark spoke very softly, which seemed to be the habit of everyone when they’re around someone sick or dying. He knew Patrick was in a coma and not likely to be disturbed by any of the chatter around him. In all honesty, it was unnerving to him. As much as he hated to think it, he felt like he was talking to a dead man. Patrick’s body was there, but he was far away from them. I hope you’re having sweet dreams, buddy. Matt squirmed in his arms and reached out to his mother. If Mark didn’t know any better he would have thought the kid knew what he had said and was determined to stay with his parents.

“Awww, sweetie.” Elisa took the small bundle in her arms and cuddled him closer. “You be a good little boy. Matty. Sleepy-by time for little ones. Thanks, Mark.” She gave him a quick smile of relief. She was exhausted too, but no one was going to be able to force her from Patrick’s side.

“Try to eat something.” Mark leaned to pluck Matt from Elisa arms and kissed her gently on the cheek. “And you do need sleep too. Patrick doesn’t want you to make yourself sick.”

“I’ll get some sleep.” Elisa took Matt’s small feet in her hands one more time, before finally releasing him. “They’re going to let me sleep here tonight.”

“Don’t worry about Matt here.” mark grinned at the child who matched his with a wide toothless one. “We’ll read a story then hit the sack.”

Before leaving the room he stopped beside his wife mother. “If anything changes, please call me. We’ll come right back.”

No calls would mean good news really. Mark thought about that as he walked down the corridor towards the elevators. He passed by one of the nurse’s and gave her a grateful smile. They normally wouldn’t have let Matt in there, but he needed to be there with his mother. Just in case. He hated that phrase so much. People said it way too much around here. Patrick had made it through the surgery. But, just in case, call everyone in. If he never heard those three words every again, he would be happy.

He rode down to the first floor in silence. Matt stared at his stoic face and pressed his tiny hand against Mark’s stubbled cheek. That wise all-knowing look was on the pint-size tots face again. “Do you have a connection to God, little one?”

Matt giggled and pressed his other hand on the left side of Mark’s face. If he possessed all the secrets of death, God and the world beyond their own, he wasn’t going to share. He just grinned and drooled like any other sweet, happy baby. Still, Mark couldn’t shake the notion that this kid knew more than all of them put together. “Daaaaaa.” He cooed.

“Yea, Matt.” Mark blinked back his tears and smiled. “Da. You miss your daddy, don’t you? But you know he’s going to be just fine. There’s no way he’s going to leave a cute little guy like you behind.”

The elevator came to a stop and the doors slid open to reveal a face as gaunt as any patient. Mark startled as he came nose to nose with Pete. The dark haired man looked very disheveled as if he had been on an all-night drinking binge. His hair was a mess, sticking up in a variety of angles. His white t-shirt and jeans looked like they had been slept in and blurry red eyes met his. He knew that Pete wasn’t drunk. He had been driving from New York when he had gotten the call about Patrick. Fearing the worst, he had drove non-stop to get to his friend’s side. “Is he....”

“He made it through the surgery.” Mark finished for him. Pete stood aside so mark and Matt could exit the elevator and walked with him to the large waiting area on the first floor. “He’s in critical condition still.”

Pete tickled Matt’s feet, unable to meet mark’s eyes. Way too much pain was visible and it was taking everything he had to keep from falling apart. “Any idea what happened? What was he doing out there in the middle of the night, in a damn rain storm driving like a maniac?”

“We don’t know.” Mark felt the same confusion that Pete did. Patrick wasn’t the type to speed on a bright sunny day, much less in weather like they had last night. He was the most cautious of them all. Especially since Matthew had been born. “Elisa said that patrick had been up at the cabin to get it ready for them. They were going to stay there at the lake next week. He called around one in the afternoon and told her he was going to meet his brother for some lunch and that he would call before he left. He didn’t.”

“Is Kevin here?”

“No.” Mark relinquished his hold of Matt and let Pete take him in his arms. “Haven’t been able to get in touch with him. Patricia said he was supposed to be in Tennessee this weekend working.”

“But, Patrick said....”

“I know.” mark cut him off. “I don’t know what went on. Maybe Patrick said that to buy more time. He could have been planning a surprise. Or maybe Kevin hadn’t left yet for Tennessee. The only two that can tell us for sure aren’t able to.”

Pete looked down at the top of Matt’s head of blond curls. So much like his father. They both fell silent and several minutes passed before he finally found his voice again. “Will he wake up?”

Mark wanted so much to reassure his friend. He wanted to tell him that everything was going to be just fine. The painful lump in his throat returned and he had to choke it back. “They don’t know.”
Pete looked away from Mark in the direction of the elevators. There was no use in delaying the inevitable. “I better go up. You taking Matt home?”

“Yep.” Mark reached out his hands to the boy, who playfully grabbed his fingers. “This guy needs some sleep. Like we all do.”

Pete wanted to talk to Mark more, just to avoid going up to see his best friend. He didn’t know how to prepare himself for this task. He was still reeling from the shock of it all. Elisa had called him on his cell phone in a state of panic. Patrick was hurt. Bad car accident. She had been a stuttering mess. Patricia wasn’t in much better shape and not able to give him much info. All he knew was that Patrick had been a wreck and was just barely clinging to life. He looks bad, she had said. He didn’t even get a chance to go home after his flight from Florida. Pete flushed slightly ashamed of what he was thinking. His best friend was hurt and he was worried about his house. “You taking the rugrat home?”

“Yep.” Mark stood up to his full height and retrieved the little tike from Pete’s arms. “This guy is wiped out.”

Pete watched Mark walk out delaying his own trek up to the ICU ward. If he could think of any excuse to delay that, he would have jumped at it. As many pairs of curious eyes began to take notice of him, he decided it was time to make the journey.

A knot twisted in his stomach as he stepped onto the elevator. With every inch it climbed, the knot grew tighter. He was scared to see him. He might lose it once he laid eyes on Patrick. He held his breath when the doors opened with a silent “whoosh”. Stepping out on the ICU ward, it didn’t take him long to figure out which direction to go. He just had to follow the sea of people. He was recognized by several, but they all kept their distance. This was not the time to be seeking autographs.

“Pete.” Someone called his name.

He turned around to find Joe running up behind him. Apparently he wasn’t the last one to show. “Hey Joe.”

Joe slid to a halt beside Pete and walked the slow pace to Patrick’s room. They reached the closed door and peered in through the glass. Elisa, Patricia, Megan and Harold . were there surrounding Patrick’s bed. A man in white stood apart from them talking quietly. It didn’t take a genius to figure out it was the surgeon. Joe pushed the door open without making a sound.

Dr. Patton continued without pause. He glanced briefly at the new arrivals but kept his attention on Patrick’s family. “There’s no way to say how much brain damage he sustained right now. That can’t be assessed until he comes out of the coma.”

The word coma made Pete go weak in the knees. It was worse than he could have imagined.
“A coma is not the biggest thing to fear.” Dr. Patton tried to reassure them all. “It’s a way for the body to heal itself. But sometimes, the damage is so extensive, it can’t be done. Patrick has brain activity, which is what we want to see. He isn’t breathing on his own yet, but his lungs sustained damage from the collision. His spleen was ruptured, so we removed that. We’re pumping him full of antibiotics right now to remove all the toxins in his blood. His right kidney was also damaged, but we believe we were able to repair it. But, I want to keep an eye on that.”

“If Patrick has suffered brain damage.....” Patricia could barely form the words, but forced herself to ask anyway. “....If he....what kind of damage could we be looking at?”

“Worst case scenario. If he wakes up, he may have impaired motor functions. Loss of speech, inability to understand.”

“In other words, a vegetable.” Patrick’s dad translated with a bitter tone. Unable to hide his emotions any longer, he turned away from the sight of his youngest son. This was not the way it was supposed to be. Kids are supposed to outlive their parents.

“In a matter of speaking, that could be true.” Dr. Patton had seen the suffering of many parents as they waited by their children’s side. He had witnessed the joys of miracles and the agony of despair. Patrick’s family were teetering between hope and painful realization that he might not come out of this. “Right now, it’s just too soon to tell.”

“Doctor.” Elisa finally spoke up and all eyes fell on the petite woman. She did not look at them but kept her gaze on her husband’s face. “How long can he stay like this?”

“He could be in a coma for a few hours to years.” He stated flatly. “But, you have to understand that the longer he’s in the coma, the more neurological damage there is. After about three months, his chances diminish significantly every day he remains comatose.”

Never wake up. Pete felt the room closing around him and a panic began to set in. He stumbled backwards and pushed through the door, trying to find some fresh air. No one noticed his sudden departure, as they listened intently to Dr. Patton report things that he could not bare to listen to. His knees trembled as he gripped the wall for support. Patrick, can’t die. If it weren’t for the witnesses in the corridor, Pete would have yelled at the top of his lungs at God for allowing this to happen. This wasn’t fair!

He felt the presence of another, before he actually looked up to find him standing there. His voice caught in his throat. Patrick older brother stood before him, soaked to the skin. “I just found out.”

“He’s hanging in there.” Pete managed.

“I was on the road when I finally was able to check my messages.” Kevin began his tone flat from the obvious shock he was in. This was his baby brother that teetered on the verge of death. This wasn’t the second time this had happened. He could never wipe from his mind the time when Death lingered close by. He had been a very small child then and Kevin had not been much older. He hadn’t always been the best older brother, but Patrick had been the best little brother. “Mom didn’t tell me much. Just said to get here fast.”

“I don’t know much either. Just got up here.” Pete felt uncomfortable standing there with him. His own grief robbed him of the comforting words Kevin needed to hear. Pete was at a loss of words and he wanted to leave this dreadful place. “Patrick’s in a coma. Doctor doesn’t know when or if he’ll come out of it.”

“Jesus.” Kevin’s face drooped and his eyes closed. Pete thought maybe he was prayer, so remained quiet. He would utter his own. “Why the hell was he out on a night like this?”

Pete’s throat went dry as his eyes locked with Kevin’s. “Patrick told Elisa that he was going to see you.”

“Well, that’s impossible.” Kevin looked confused. “Patrick knew I was going to be in Tennessee until today.”

“You haven’t talked to him since you left town?”

“I talked to him on Thursday.” Kevin thought back to his conversation with his brother. “He was planning a weekend with the family up at the cabin. He didn’t give me any specific details about it. We just shot the shit for a while, then I had to finish packing. Next thing I know, mom’s calling me in tears.”

“I see.” Pete said slowly. “Guess they won’t know what happened until he wakes up.”

“If he wakes up.” Kevin corrected.

Pete stiffened as Kevin turned away from him. He couldn’t put his finger on why, but a suspicion grew in his gut. Kevin wasn’t telling him the complete story. He had no proof to this and no real reason to even think it, but he could not shake the feeling. It was something about the way he had looked at him. It was as if Kevin was putting on an act for him. “This is fucking weird.” He mumbled.

“You talking to yourself now?” Joe appeared beside him causing Pete to jump. The younger man laughed at the glare Pete shot towards him. “Let’s go get some coffee.”

Pete started to protest, but Joe took him firmly by the shoulder and directed him towards the lounge at the end of the hall. Luckily for them, the lounge was empty and they could talk with some sense of privacy. Pete still looked pale and sipped his coffee very slow as his thoughts remained focused on Patrick. “I talked to Kevin before he went in.”

Joe set his coffee down on the scarred table and leaned back to stretch out his stiff muscles. “He looked like a friggen mess.”

“Mark had said before he left with Matt that Patrick claimed to be seeing Kevin yesterday.”

“That’s what Elisa said.” Joe leaned closer to Pete and lowered his voice. Regardless of the fact that they were alone, he didn’t want anyone accidentally overhearing them. “I take it Kevin didn’t confirm that story.”

“Said that Patrick knew he was out of town.” The nagging feeling returned causing the taste of his coffee to sour in his mouth. “It’s not like Patrick to lie.”

“He can, Pete, and you know it.” Joe stated firmly. Pete glared at him, forcing him to soften his tone. “Everyone is capable of it and sometimes it’s necessary. You know Patrick and Elisa had a massive fight last week. He was probably working on ways to make up for what happened.”

“You’re probably right.” Pete decided to just agree and drop the subject. What-ifing this to death was not going to calm his nerves or settle the unyielding questions in his mind. It was more important to concentrate on helping Elisa and Matt through this. The last thing she needed was doubts about what her own husband had been up to that night. Having him back hole with them was what mattered.

“You going back in?” Joe asked as he tossed his paper coffee cup into a wastebasket. “Visiting hours are already closed, but they were nice enough to allow us to stay. Think they’re about to kick us all out now.”

“I think I’m going to go home.” He hated giving into fear and weakness, but he just didn’t have the stomach or drive to put up a front for everyone. Just the sight of Patrick had made him sick. There was no way he could stand in there pretending to be a pillar of strength for his friend’s family. “I’ll stop in to say night to everyone, then head back to the house.”

“Okay.” Joe nodded, understanding how Pete felt. Every one of them had their own unique way of dealing with this. Pete needed more time to clear his head before he could talk about what had happened and what Patrick would face if he came to.

They walked back in silence, neither wanting to say any more forced words of condolence or confidence that everything would turn out fine. Joe pushed the door open and led them both inside. Only Kevin glanced back at them. His face was impossible to read. The doctor’s voice flowed to them and stole the last bit of hope from Pete. “It would be best that you have everything put in order for Patrick. Just in case.”

He’s not going to make it. Pete bit down hard on his lower lip and squeezed back his tears. Patrick’s not dead yet. Stop planning his fucking funeral!

Without another word or sound, Pete turned away from them and left Patrick’s room. He didn’t stop as he made his way to the elevator and rode down alone. He had to keep himself calm and prevent himself from breaking into a run back to his car. He slowed his legs as he crossed the parking lot. His heart beat loudly in his ears, while tears built up in the corners of his eyes. His hands shook as he struggled to pull his keys from his coat pocket and hit the unlock button. The sound of the beep from the locks releasing could barely be made over his rapid breathing. Pete slammed the door behind him and laid his forehead against the steering wheel of his SUV. Since hearing the dreadful news, Pete finally allowed himself to cry. He had to be realistic. He needed to stop lying to himself. Patrick didn’t look good. And it might be for the best that his friend didn’t make it. “Goddamn it! No! No! No!” He slammed his fist against the wheel as he let his rage out.

He was not going to give up on Patrick. He was not going to plan his funeral. Fuck that. Pete cranked the engine and sped out of the hospital parking lot. “It’s going to be okay. He’s going to be okay.” He decided he would chant that over and over until he finally believed it.