The Bond of Brothers

The waiting room overflowed with concerned friends and family. The halls were finally cleared, but the sound of reporters and fans could be heard outside. Andy and his wife Sarah stood with Joe and his wife Kristen. Pete and Kevin talked softly amongst themselves while Elisa stood locked armed with Patricia. Mark and Megan huddled together trying to look strong but still visibly showing their terror. They were forced down the hall without a word. All they could do was prepare for the worst, while praying for the best. She didn’t want to think of funeral plans. But that was a reality they had to all face.

“He would hate this.” Elisa sobbed in her mother-in-law’s arms. “He would want one of us to be there with him.”

“I know.” Patricia stroked her back as she spoke. “We have to be strong for him and Matt. You have to keep it together for Matty’s sake. If the worst happens, he’s going to need you to be strong.”

“Mrs. Stump?” Dr. Patton stood before her with neither a frown nor a smile. “Come with me, please.”

With her heart in her throat, she relinquished her grip on Patricia and followed the surgeon. She reminded herself not to hate the man. He had saved Patrick from death once. He had done everything he could. If anything, he had at least given her more time with Patrick. She would always be grateful for that. I hope you knew how much I loved you, baby. How much we did. I’m so sorry for what I said. So sorry for the way things have been.

The room was silent, unlike the way it had been when she was forced to leave. The sound of the screeching heart monitors were no longer visible. Her worst fear waited for her and it stole the strength from her legs. “I can’t do this.”

“Elisa....”

“I know you did your best.” She countered, trying to pull away from the doctor. “I don’t blame you at all. You were a miracle worker.” Somehow, he managed to maneuver her into the room despite the resistance she put up. Without a word he turned the grieving woman around to face her husband. “Oh, my God.”

Dr. Patton released his hold as she came face to face with Patrick. “How about one more miracle.”

His eyes were wide with shock and confusion, but they were still the same shade of amazing blue green. The face was the same too, except the beautiful smile was not there. Patrick stared up at her with a mixture of interest and terror.

“Patrick.” Her voice stuck in her throat as tears flowed from her eyes. He was awake finally and she was at a loss for words. She had managed to sustain hours of conversation with him while he his eyes were closed, but suddenly couldn’t think of a single intelligent thing to say now that he was awake. Her knees went weak. “I prayed for this.”

Patrick couldn’t move his head and his mouth seemed to not belong to him. His eyes were the only thing that allowed him to scan the room, but they refused to focus on any object. Voices sounded garbled in his ears while a roaring caused his head to ache. His heart beat rapidly, while his throat hurt mercilessly. Confusion fought back clarity and uncontrollable tears sprang to his eyes. “Huuu...uhh”

“Don’t try to speak, Patrick.” Dr. Patton was by his side, but Patrick couldn’t make out his facial features. He sounded like someone trapped under water. Large hands touched him, but he wasn’t sure exactly where. His touch caused him to jump. The voice continued, fading in and out of clarity. “You need to relax.”

“Talk to me, Patrick.” Elisa forced past the physician and grabbed his left hand. Clasping it tightly, delight turned to pain as she comprehended the expression on her husband’s face. Her eyes fell to their hands. Only she held on.

“Elisa” A voice interrupted her. Her hand was forced away and she felt herself being pulled from him. Patrick stared at her not trying to halt her retreat. The look of fear stayed on his face. Elisa wanted to scream out. She wanted to rip her arms from the intrusive hands that held her and force Patrick to look at her. Force him to speak.

“What the hell are you doing?” She finally managed to break loose. Her glare fell on Dr. Patton. “He’s awake! You know how long I’ve been waiting for him to wake up. How dare you pull me away...”

“There are a few things we need to talk about, Elisa.” He kept his voice gentle. Years of experience dealing with emotional family members had made that somewhat more easy for him, but it still tugged at his heart every time. He got her in the hallway away from the prying eyes of others so he could explain to her what she was about to face. “This is a miracle. So don’t let anything I’m about to say dampen this. The fact that he’s opened his eyes is astounding. But I told you that if he came back, there would be complications. He suffered a massive head injury.”

“What?” She gave up any hopes of keeping herself restrained. There was just no way anyone could expect that from her. She had practically lived there at the hospital for the past two months. They were lucky she hadn’t started doing cartwheels down the hall. “Just tell me before I go nuts here.”

“Elisa.” There was just no easy way of putting this. He paused so he could clear his throat. “He has no idea what has happened or where he is. He’s confused and terrified. We don’t have a clear picture of how much damage he’s suffered. Or how hard a road he’s going to have before him. You are going to need to take it very slow. Be patient. He’s not just going to jump out of that bed and be ready to go home.”

“Okay.” Elisa threw her hands up in defeat. “I’ll calm down. I promise I’ll be gentle and quiet with him. I won’t excite him or get upset myself. But I need to go in there. I have to talk to him. Let him know he’s not alone.”

“You can go in, if you promise to do exactly that. Don’t force it.” His frown turned and the light in his eyes was there again. “He has a long recovery, but today is a day to celebrate. But Patrick doesn’t understand that. He has no idea what’s been going on.”

“He needs me, doc.” Elisa forced the excitement and dread deep down and leveled the pitch of her voice. Only her trembling hands gave her anxiety away. “I’ll behave. I swear.”

*************************************

He had to have help to sit up. It seemed like every muscle in his body rejected any commands from his muddled brain. Basically, nothing was working properly. His eyes refused to focus and every breath felt like he was sucking in thick liquid. Panic set in the second he opened his eyes and the bright lights scorched his retinas. All he wanted to do was close them again and retreat back into darkness. It was safer there. A nurse with red hair pulled a needle from his arm and a feeling of warmth overtook the panic forcing him to relax. He felt like he should know what it was she was doing, but he only stared at her. Nothing made sense.

“This will help you relax, Patrick.” She said to him, but he did not react. The wild eyes dimmed somewhat and the tensed muscles in his neck and upper body eased. “This feeling of confusion is perfectly normal.”

“It’s common for post-coma patients to experience extreme anxiety and confusion once they wake up.” Dr. Patton explained as he led Elisa back into Patrick’s room. He stopped when he realized that he had Patrick’s full attention, as well as, the man’s wife. “It might seem like just waking up from a deep sleep to some. For others it’s traumatic. A nightmare.”

“Is that why he started convulsing?”

“That was not the norm, but it could be a contributory factor. It also could be side effects of the medications and brain injury.” Patrick continued to gaze at them, but there was no sign of recognition. His head tilted slightly as his eyes locked on Elisa. “Shock can be powerful.”

He cleared the room out so that it was only the three of them. An uneasy hush settled amongst the group and Patrick’s gaze shifted uneasily between the two. He blinked but the blurriness would not cease. This was like a nightmare that he couldn’t wake up from. Beings without faces ascending upon him to do ungodly things to him. The taller one stepped forward causing Patrick to shrink from his extended hand. He opened his mouth and forced himself to take a full gulp of air. It was garbled but the message was clear. “Don’t....don’t touch...”

“It’s okay, Patrick.”

“Don’t touch....” He managed a little clearer.

“You’re safe, Patrick. In a hospital.” Dr. Patton tried to sound soothing, but he was not feeling comforted by the doctor.

His eyes widened but it wasn’t from the sight of the doctor. The roar of his rapid heart and gasping breathing filled his ears and smothered the voice of the man in front of him. Flashes of brightness hurt his head. The source of light was unclear to him, but the fear intensified. “No!”

Hands swung out but missed their mark. Dr. Patton easily dodged Patrick’s defensive swings. “Easy. I’m just checking your eyes.”

Patrick held his palms up trying to shield himself from the painful glare. “Bright lights.” He whimpered causing him to flinch. Even Elisa looked ill as Patrick shrunk away from them like a frightened child. “Lights.” He muttered.

“He’s still in shock.” He explained, but the look of concern spoke louder than his words. “Still lingering between the sleeping and waking world.”

“I don’t understand.”

Before he would explain, the doctor pushed Elisa gently towards the closed door. “Let’s talk outside.”

“You!” Patrick shouted. Startled, Elisa turned around, but for a moment felt like making a run for the door. The low accusing tone of his voice made her blood run cold through her veins. Patrick sat up straight with his right hand extended towards her. He pointed a finger at her. “You.”

“Yes, Patrick.” She tried to calm her trembling knees and fake an easiness in her voice. With deliberate slowness so as to not frighten him, she crossed the room and stood next to Patrick. His eyes did not divert from her. “I’m here, baby.”

He could make out more of her features now that she was closer and the fear dissipated. An uncertain smile crossed his face and relief lit up his eyes. Elisa took his outstretched hand as tears welled up in the corner of her eyes. Patrick pulled her closer and onto the side of his bed. She could have burst from joy as he gently stroked her exposed arms. The apprehensive look was gone from his face, replaced by a more pacific mien. He cupped her face and caressed her cheek. She could tell he was still having trouble focusing on her face. The raven mane around her face was what he focused on. She looked like an angel, but he knew she was of flesh and blood. His voice came out in a hoarse whisper and the pain registered on his emotion stricken face. “Thank……God….you…..”

“You had us all so worried.”

“You were gone. I….didn’t…..” Patrick’s words came out at an alarming speed as if racing against some invisible time clockt and crashing over a confused tongue that didn’t want to cooperate. He needed to get as many words out as he could. “Thought…I thought…. dead.”

“You’re not baby.” Elisa took his face in her hands. “We’re both right here.”

“You’re alive.”

Confusion narrowed her eyes. Of course she was alive. He was the one who had been clinging to life. “Patrick, are you okay?”

Patrick didn’t seem to understand the question and continued to just gaze at her. He was lost somewhere she was not allowed to enter. “I saw you. I saw you.”

“When, Patrick?” She tried to ask calmly. “Baby when did you see me?”

“I......” Patrick hesitated and his stare intensified as if he was trying to look inside of her. The sweet smile fell and a colder frown took its place. Elisa gasped as he jerked his hands from her and shoved her hands away from him. “What the.....what…. are you doing?”

“I’m just....”

“I thought.....” His gaze traveled from Elisa to the doctor and back again. “Who are you?”

***********************************

If he had risen from the bed and punched her in the stomach, it would not have hurt as much as that one question. Just three words managed to strip her of the hard-sought happiness since this nightmare began. She thought she had prepared herself for all possible ramifications of Patrick’s nearly fatal injuries. She had been so focused on the act of opening his eyes and not allowed herself the time to mull over what they could be facing once he did. She had read up on coma patients. She knew that there would be brain damage and a long recovery. He wouldn’t just bounce out of bed and back into his life. He would be weak. He would have physical problems to overcome in rehab. But to not remember her? That was something she had not even considered. How could her husband not know her?

For childish reasons and she was aware of that, Elisa felt a sense of betrayal. She was his wife, mother of his child, confidant and lover. There should be no doubt who she was. But it was there written all over his face. His frown pulled down his lips and lines increased in his forehead. He looked at her like she was a complete stranger to him.

“Do you remember what happened?” The doctor asked.

Patrick shook his head as he slowly examined the tubes that entered his arms. “I got hurt.” He stretched his jaw trying to awaken his body more. Talking was coming easier but was a real bitch.

“Do you know how you got hurt, Patrick?” He continued. Elisa could only sit in stunned silence as they talked.

“No.” Patrick mumbled.

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

Patrick paused his fingering of the clear tube that ran from his left hand to a tall medal rack above him. “Lights.”

“Do you know where the lights came from?” Dr. Patton asked, but he only shook his head again. Right now what he remembered was not reliable or clear. “You were driving your jeep. It was raining.”

His face fell slack and his eyes grew dimmer. A tremble began in his hands and traveled up his arms. “I was blinded. Lights.”

“Car lights?” Elisa asked, hoping that some memories of that horrible night were breaking through the fog of confusion that consumed him.

“I don’t know.” He mumbled. “Just remember bright lights.”

“You lost control of your jeep, Patrick.” Elisa continued. He tried to turn away from her, but she wasn’t going to allow that. “Did someone cause you to do that? Run you off the road?”

“I told you.” His voice rose. “I don’t fucking remember!”

“Patrick!” Elisa stared at him in shock. This wasn’t like him at all.

“What?” His anger was beginning to show. “You want me to tell you something, but I don’t know anything! I can’t remember a damn thing! If you say I was driving a jeep, then fine. Whatever. I can’t remember it. I see lights. Bright fucking lights!”

“I..I’m sorry.” Backing up, Elisa no longer knew who she was talking to. His handsome face bore an expression of intense anger and maybe even a little hate. He wasn’t looking at his wife, the woman he promised to love for the rest of his life. Tears fell down her cheeks. “Patrick...”

“Is that my name?” He asked, his voice cracking from all the conflicting emotions that battled for control. He was so afraid and angry at the same time. He wanted to blame someone, but didn’t know who to turn his wrath upon. He leaned back against the pillows and let his head fall back. “I can’t deal with this shit right now. Just go. Leave me alone.”

“It’s for the best.” Dr. Patton tried to ease Elisa towards the door. “He needs to rest. It might take him some time to figure all of this out.”

“My own husband doesn’t remember me.” The agitation and hurt was clear in the tightness of her voice. Her eyes avoided him and remained on the door as it closed behind them. Patrick was no longer visible to her, but the expression on his face had been burned in her mind. Dr. Patton couldn’t possible understand the agony this was causing. “How bad is this? Has he lost his memory for good or will he get it back?”

“I can’t answer that right now. We’re just beginning to run tests to assess the severity of the brain damage he has suffered. Memory loss is common with blunt head trauma. It could last for a few hours or a few years. There’s just no way to give you a specific time frame.”

“No, this just can’t be happening.” She paced across the hall with her arms crossed. She wanted to scream at the doctor even though it wasn’t the man’s fault. He had done everything possible for them. He had saved Patrick. “I can’t believe this.”

“Elisa.” Dr. Patton took her firmly by the shoulders and forced her to stop her pacing. His old gentlemanly face lit up with concern. Just like most of the staff, he had become very affected by this young couple. There was nothing he wanted more than to give this beautiful woman her husband back. And after all the stories he had heard about the young man beyond those closed doors, he felt as if he knew him. The actions of Patrick had come as surprise to him too. “He’s just come out of a coma. He’s not sure of anything right now. We have to give him time to clear his head. I think the fewer the visitors the better. You need to narrow the list down as much as possible. Also, he needs as little excitement as possible. The more stress he is put under, the slower his recovery could be.”

“What exactly are you saying?”

“No more twenty questions. Limit the conversation to things he wants to talk about. Try not to influence his memories too much. He needs to remember his life on his own. I think he should be shielded as much as possible from fans and the media. That will only cause more anxiety.”

“Okay. Fine.” She pulled away from the doctor and began to walk back to the waiting room where all their friends and family anxiously awaited. They needed to know the good news. And the bad. Dr. Patton watched her as she walked away. There was little else he could do for her right now. With a heavy sigh, he pushed Patrick’s door open again. He still had a lot of work to do.

All eyes fell on her as soon as she crossed the threshold. Patrick’s parents, step father, sister and brother stood closest to her and looked at her with dread. Elisa brushed the tears away and smiled at them. Focus on the good, Elisa. Only on the good. “Patrick’s awake!”