A Mighty Need

Audrey’s condo was finally being sold. That was the text message she had received from her real estate agent while she was sitting on the set of Miranda a few days later at BBC Television Centre in West London. There wasn’t any filming going on at the moment because Miranda had come down with a sneezing fit and went off to find some tissues and then have make-up reapplied to her face so her nose didn’t make her look like Rudolph for the camera. Audrey was smiling ruefully as the condo had been her last tie to living in the States. She was a bit surprised it had taken so long to sell. The place was in tiptop shape and was worth more now than when she bought it a few years back. There had been a potential buyer at the end of September and she had been in escrow but then it fell through when the buyer had to back out due to unforeseen financial circumstances. So, Audrey’s estate agent had to remove the ‘sale pending’ stamp from the online listing and try to get new buyers. By mid-November there had apparently been two buyers who really wanted the place and were trying to outbid each other. Both offers were submitted to Audrey while she was in town for Thanksgiving and both were over her initial asking price. One potential buyer had offered an extra fifty grand to the asking price, but the second added an extra one hundred grand.

It was a breathtaking amount for any sane person. Considering her the original asking price had been $1.5 million, anything extra was just a bonus and her brain fizzed at the amount. However, the underdog in her humbled her a bit and she felt like maybe the person offering the lesser bid was already stretching the limits of what they could afford. Both clearly wanted the condo and one was able to easily throw in an extra 100k like it was no big deal. The underdog in her reared its ugly head and she had chosen the lesser amount of the two; accepting the offer of $1.55 million over the offer of $1.6 million.

Audrey had accepted the lower of the two offers on December 1st, the day after she had arrived home to London with Noel and Austin. Her estate agent had faxed a copy of the paperwork Audrey needed to sign to go through with the sale and then she faxed it all back on Tuesday. By Thursday, as mentioned, Audrey received word the house was being sold, which meant the buyer had signed his or her share of the papers.

She was officially in escrow.

Despite the bittersweet notion of it all, Audrey was ecstatic as well and was smiling like a loon by the time Miranda returned to the set.

“What’s got you so excited? Did you receive a deviant text from your lover boy?”

Audrey looked up at Miranda and shook her head. “I’m in escrow,” she replied. “I’m finally selling my condo back in Philadelphia.”

“Ooh, very nice. How much you making off it?”

“One million, five hundred and fifty thousand dollars,” Audrey replied. “I’m not sure what the conversion to British pounds would be on that. Under a million, I guess.”

“That’s a nice chunk of change.”

Audrey nodded. “Yeah it is, and I’m getting the entire amount. When I originally bought the condo a few years back, I paid nine hundred thousand for it but I paid it all off within six months,” she smirked proudly.

“How the fuck d’you do that?”

“Penny pinching and sheer force of will.”

“Alright, you lovely ladies; are we ready to film this scene?” asked the director as he walked up to the set.

“Yes, I promise, no more sneezing,” Miranda said, holding up her hand as if about to swear an oath.

Audrey turned her cell phone off and pocketed it away in the dentist’s lab coat she was wearing a part of her character’s costume. She was playing Dr. Beatrice Keane, Miranda’s new dentist and Audrey was using a British accent for the part. She had worked the day before with a dialect coach but for the most part didn’t really need one. The coach had said she’d worked with several people in the past who were naturals at certain accents, and Audrey happened to be one of them, which of course made Audrey feel quite pleased with herself. She just had to mentally remind herself not to let any American sounds slip out as she spoke.

She had no ambitions about being an actress whatsoever, but this was certainly something that she could be okay doing once in a great while.



The following week, after filming her solitary yet equally hilarious scene for Miranda (which included Miranda tripping over her own two feet and knocking the dental utensils off a tray), Audrey had been proofreading her entire finished novel. She stocked up on computer paper and printer ink and proceeded in printing the entire fucking thing out, going out to get it finished with book binding before sealing it and mailing it to her editor in New York via FedEx.

She sent an email to her editor, letting him know her manuscript was in the mail and to keep an eye out for it and from there it was simply a waiting game to hear back in regard to what changes they might have her make and what she would fight them over about what she would actually change. She didn’t really like negative criticism when it came to anything she’d created.

Basically, if you had nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

Something along those lines.

The week after that was Austin’s twenty-fifth birthday. Audrey had Austin dictate what he wanted to do and she would try and do it for him if it was something he couldn’t do for himself. He was rather simple about it all, though. He slept in until one and after a shower, announced he had a hankering for Subway for lunch. So, Audrey went with him to a Subway restaurant; the same one they ate at on Christmas Eve the year before in Camden with Noel. While sitting inside, eating, Audrey chose that moment to give him his birthday gift. It was a £500 gift card to Hollister, which he chose to use right away. After they finished eating, they took the tube to Piccadilly Circus and walked up to the Regent Street Hollister, where Audrey had bought the gift card few days earlier. While Austin shopped around, Audrey stood near the front of the store and called up Noel.

Even though the day had been left up to Austin, they also had something planned for him later on around dinner time, and it turned out to be something Austin was one hundred percent for. Since he hadn’t really made friends of his own yet, it was just a small group that gathered in the Kingpin Suite at Bloomsbury Lanes. The kitchen provided American diner food so it was a bit of home for Austin who eventually ordered a juicy burger for diner after their first game of bowling.

Noel and Audrey were of course there, along with Mike and Lauren, Ray and Diane, and Serge and wife Amy. They played, in total, three games of bowling, sang karaoke, had a few drinks and, of course, had dinner there, too. During dinner, Diane disappeared and returned with a birthday cake that Audrey had asked if she could pick up. Somehow Diane had been able to get the kitchen staff to hide the cake for them until they needed it. It was from Tesco’s bakery and made to look like a hamburger. They were provided extra plates and forks and a knife to cut the cake. Of all the things to forget, though, they forgot a birthday candle, so Noel grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and drew one, then stuck it upright on the top of the cake.

It was an all in all great evening for the birthday boy and Audrey was happy that he was happy.

That night, once they got home and Austin had gone up to his room to talk to their parents who had called (since it was still early enough back in the States), Audrey and Noel sank down onto the couch together. Noel leaned over to lie on his side and pulled Audrey with him so that he was spooning her. She reached an arm out to the coffee table and grabbed the remote and they laid there like that, watching a bit of TV. Noel pressed the tip of his nose into the back of her hair and closed his eyes, not caring about what was on the screen. All three of their cats (his two and her one) came out of the woodwork to greet their human parents and climb up on top of them.

Audrey couldn’t help but laugh at how they must look, covered in cats. Rhiannon was at her feet and resting slightly on them while Noel’s smaller cat was on his hip and the larger one was just above his head at the arm rest.

“If the world could see us right now, we’d be called a pair of crazy cat people,” she giggled.

“MouseCat and AmeriCat,” he muttered in a goofy, higher pitched voice.

“AmeriCat?” she repeated.

Noel squeaked simply in her ear, “Yeap,” which caused Audrey to giggle some more.

As she was lying on her left side, Audrey was only able to lift her right arm up and reach it behind her to cup Noel’s face. In response, he nuzzled the side of her neck and kissed her shoulder before working his way back up to her ear and purring in it. The sound sent lovely shivers down Audrey’s spine that she had to shift her body around so that she was now facing him. Rhiannon meowed at her for moving, so the black cat jumped off the couch and scampered off elsewhere. Noel’s larger cat followed suit but the smaller one seemed perfectly content and determined to remain on his hip.

“I love you,” Audrey spoke before leaning in for a kiss.

Noel stretched his left arm out so that she could lie on it and then curled it around her head to pull her face in closer. His right arm wrapped itself around her upper body while she just lay there cocooned in his arms with her hands at the base of his throat, ready to move them upward to ravish her fingers through his hair at any given moment.

“I love you more.”

Audrey narrowed her hazel eyes at him. “I love you the most.”

“I love you the most times infinity.”

“I love you the most times infinity plus one,” Audrey grinned. “Bam!”

“One-upper.”

“Zero…downer…” Even she was unsure of that comeback.

“That doesn’t even make sense,” Noel chastised.

“It doesn’t have to.”

It was Noel’s turn to narrow his eyes. “I like how your brain works.”

“I like how your everything works.” She watched as he mock-scowled at her and she laughed at it.

“Like I said: one-upper.”

“You love it.”

“I love you.”

Audrey snickered. “Here we go again.”



Two weeks later, Noel and Audrey, along with Austin, were back in the States again. However, this time, they didn’t go to Philadelphia and, instead, flew in to Columbus. The couple had decided they would try to alternate every year between both families and, since she spent Christmas with his the year before, it was his turn to spend it with hers, which was fine with him. Her parents had driven to Columbus and were staying in the extra bedroom and Austin planned on crashing on the couch in the living room while Audrey and Noel were staying at a hotel room in the city and was paying for a second one so her brother Eddie and sister-in-law Steph would come for a visit as well.

It was one big family reunion and the first time the Woods had all of their children together in a year and a half since Eddie’s wedding. It was also the first time Noel got to meet Audrey’s other brother and they hit it off decently enough, though Noel would later confess to her that he thought Eddie had a bit of an underlining douche-y demeanor about him.

Audrey didn’t get mad at Noel for saying that or seemed the least bit offended on her brother’s behalf because, the truth was, Eddie could be somewhat of a douche at times. Audrey told Noel that growing up he acted out somewhat. Part of it was due to his ADHD and the other was that as a child and teen he had been so good at sports that he was often lauded because of his athletic achievements and it gave him a big head. He was the baby for a number of years before Austin was born and never seemed to shake the entitlement youngest children seem to have. The eldest has the burden of helping to look after the younger siblings and set an example, the middle children are often lost in the shuffle and the youngest fawned over because they are more “new” and adorable and if they make mistakes it’s because they don’t know any better.

Such was not the case in the Woods family, though. It was all reversed. Despite Audrey being the eldest, she often felt overlooked in favor of Crystal who was slimmer and more active in school, whereas Audrey was a bit of a loner who liked to stay in her room most of the time, reading or watching TV or listening to music. Eddie was the star of the family for so long, and Austin just kind of toddled along, looking up to the older three, wanting to hang around them but often pushed aside. That was another reason why Audrey and Austin were closer, despite the larger age gap. She saw him as a sort of baby doll and would spend hours carrying him around and trying to teach him things while Crystal and Eddie would want to go off playing with their friends.

There was a weird family dynamic but they each seemed to find their niche. And, once they all reached adulthood, they finally seemed closer to each other than they had as children. Growing up and maturing certainly helped.

Just before Christmas, Audrey and Noel went off shopping for everyone and stopped to get gift wrap, tape and scissors to wrap said gifts. On Christmas Eve, during the afternoon, the womenfolk piled into a car together and went shopping for Christmas dinner food for the following day. As awkward as it would be for Noel, Audrey and Austin, and despite being adults who could make decisions for themselves, it was kind of unspoken that they were expected to join everyone for Christmas Eve service at the church Crystal and her family had joined after first moving to Columbus.

While the women were gone, Eddie and Austin were inside the house with Tristan, playing some sort of Lego's video game while Noel was outside in the front yard with Jeremy while Avery and their dog rolled around in the snow.

Noel was wearing his cream-colored coat with the green trees and the faux fur collar; his hands shoved in his pockets and his face buried behind a scarf. Jeremy seemed immune somehow in just a thick sweater, gloves and a knit cap on his head.

“So, how is life in London with Audrey and Austin?” Jeremy wondered.

“It’s amazing, to be honest. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier.”

“Even with Austin there?” Jeremy questioned. “How do you have sex with him always around?”

Noel chuckled. “You have two kids; how do you manage?”

“Barely.”

“Well, Austin knew what he was getting into,” Noel tutted. “Sometimes we attempt to be discreet, sometimes we forget he’s there and he bangs on the wall.”

Jeremy looked at Noel and laughed. “Wow, I can just imagine.”

“We don’t purposely try to gross him out or anything. We do try and wait until he’s out of the house for a few hours here and there. Or if he’s downstairs, it’s easier to be upstairs and go at it, y’know?”

“Now that the kids are a bit older, we can just leave them alone in the living room or whatever for a while and tell them that mommy and daddy are going to take a nap for a while.”

“And, of course, that’s not what you’re doing…”

Jeremy shrugged. “Well, sometimes that literally is what we’re doing.” He smiled ruefully. “We got married and started our family young so we didn’t get to have wild nights and sleep late on the weekends like most people in their twenties. I mean, we knew what we were getting into, but you can’t really understand what it all entails until it’s too late and you’re in the thick of it.” Both men looked toward Avery, flopping around and throwing snow at the dog. “You’re exhausted and it feels like your beating your head against a wall everyday sometimes but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

“Sounds a bit like sado-masochism,” Noel teased.

“Yeah, it kind of is,” Jeremy laughed in response. He then looked upward at Noel. “Any plans like that for your future?”

Noel bit his lips together before replying. “Can you keep a secret?”

Jeremy raised an eyebrow and nodded. “Yeah.”

“I bought Audrey a ring.”

Jeremy’s eyes went wide. “An engagement ring?”

Noel nodded. “I bought it last month, actually; like a week or so after Halloween.”

“Seriously? Shit.” Jeremy seemed impressed. “Are you planning to propose tonight or tomorrow or maybe New Years?”

“No, I didn’t bring it here with me. It’s at my mum and dad’s house. I didn’t want to risk Audrey accidentally finding it.”

“So, when are you planning on popping the question?”

“Well, I know it’s completely cliché and cheesy, but I was thinking to do it on Valentine’s Day. We took our first vacation together on the last Valentine’s. We went to Paris for a few days, so I was thinking maybe we’d go back there and I’d do it. But, I don’t want the proposal to be cliché, y’know? I’m not a cliché person. I want to give her an original proposal, but I’m not sure what. I asked my dad for ideas, but considering he and my mum were just eighteen when they had me, their decision to get married was mostly along the lines of, ‘well hey, we love each other and there’s a kid on the way; marriage is the logical step to make.’ I don’t want to be logical.” Jeremy just nodded and Noel sighed; a puff of his warm breath billowing out into the cold air. “How did you propose to Crystal?”

“I asked Lou first,” Jeremy began. “I went the old school route of asking the father for his daughter’s hand in marriage. Lou didn’t seem to care so much. Mary, on the other hand, seemed a bit indifferent. She and I didn’t get along so much in the beginning because I just lacked direction with my life and I think she thought I would hold Crystal back. And she probably just thought we were too young. But I had their blessing, regardless, so I took Crystal to Fort Washington State Park. I told her we were going on a picnic and to pack some food and drinks. After we ate, we went walking and I led her to this spot underneath a bridge and I got down on one knee, told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me and then I asked her to marry me.”

“Obviously she said yes because here you are today.”

Jeremy smiled. “Yeah,” he nodded. “We got married two years later, almost to the day. We celebrated our tenth anniversary on October 14th.”

“Congratulations.”

“Thank you.” Jeremy bent down and grabbed some snow, packing it into a ball in his hands before tossing it at his daughter, then laughing as she squealed and tried to retaliate. “See, Crystal is a conventional girl, so the picnic in a park and getting down on one knee type of romantic gesture is what worked best for us. Audrey…I’ve never known her to be conventional. She was always quiet with her nose in a book and when she did join a conversation, she was making a joke or being sarcastic. I’ve known her since we were twelve; me and her are only four months apart in age. We graduated high school together. I’ve known her more than half my life and I know she likes off the wall things and scary movies and she creates her own little worlds with the stories she’s always told. I barely got to know the two guys she dated before you. The one right out of college seemed decent enough and they liked the same things but he ended up cheating on her with his ex-girlfriend who he wound up getting pregnant. It was a few more years before she dated anyone again and that was the guy she was with when she first became a success. He had this great job and turned out to just be an asshole who didn’t want her to make more money than he did or something.” Jeremy looked directly at Noel. “I love Audrey as a sister more than my actual sister, so however you propose to her, make her feel special.”

“I can definitely promise that,” Noel assured.

“Oh, and also,” Jeremy added, “Lou might not say it, because he didn’t say it to me when I asked if it was cool to marry Crystal but, if you break Audrey’s heart in any way, I will personally fly myself to London and break both your legs.”

Noel smiled. “Cross my heart and hope to die,” he responded, crossing his heart with his right index finger. He then went serious. “You do promise not to say anything, though, right?”



That night, Noel and Audrey sat side by side in a Lutheran church and both were surprised they didn’t burst into flames when they first entered. They took the service programs and white candles with white cardboard drip guards and followed Crystal and her family to their usual spot. This was one of the rare occasions Noel was dressed casual, like everyone else, and it was weird for Audrey to see because she was so used to him dressed not casual. Colorful, sometimes punk, sometimes Goth, sometimes feminine was his casual dress. Yet, there he was. Granted, he still wore a pair of black, skinny jeans and his pair of black Chelsea boots, but now he was wearing a normal black dress shirt (tucked in, no less!) and a grey shawl collar cardigan that caused Audrey to ask him if he had raided Julian’s closet at some point when she wasn't paying attention.

“I don’t want to embarrass your family,” he responded shyly, before they had gone down to the lobby of their hotel to meet up with Eddie and Steph to carpool to the church.

Audrey had raised an eyebrow at him. “Fuck that,” she said, picking at some random fibers on his cardigan. “You’ve never dressed to impress anyone in the time I’ve known you. Don’t start now; even if it’s my family.”

He still kept the clothes on and he did wear them well. He could wear anything well, really. When the lights dimmed toward the end of the service, attendants went from aisle to aisle with their own candles, lighting the candles of the people toward the inside of the aisle. Then those people turned to whoever was next to them and lit their candle; so on, so forth. While everyone stood in the almost dark with nothing but candle flames in front of their faces and singing along to ‘Silent Night’, Audrey took the opportunity to reach a hand under Noel’s cardigan and untuck his dress shirt. It had been bugging her that he thought he had to “conform” to fit in with her family’s world.

She never did, so she didn’t expect him to either.

Noel just looked down at her and smirked, leaning down to kiss her. “Happy Christmas Eve,” he murmured against her lips.

“Happy Christmas to you, too,” she repeated, instead of saying ‘merry’ like her fellow Americans.

After service, they dumped all their candles in baskets at the back of the church and threw their coats and jackets back on before heading to the church parking lot to get into their cars. Austin went back to Crystal and Jeremy’s house in their parents’ car while Audrey, Noel, Eddie and Steph all went back to their hotel for the night. After getting settled in for the night, there came a knock at Noel and Audrey’s door.

Noel went to it and peered through the peephole, then opened the door up and stepped aside, revealing Eddie and Steph holding a bottle of rum, a carton of egg nog and a few red plastic cups as well as a package of sugar cookies.

“We don’t have to go to bed early for Santa Claus,” Steph smiled. “We can stay up and have a mini Christmas party.” Before she got any further into the room, she stopped and looked around. “Holy shit, your room is bigger than ours.”

“It’s the hotel’s take on a Presidential Suite.”

Steph pouted, teasingly. “How come you get the bigger room?”

Eddie frowned at his wife. “Because they paid for both our rooms,” he replied, standing at the table of the suite’s kitchen and starting to mix the spiked egg nog drinks for all four of them.

“I booked you two a suite, too: the Executive Suite.”

Eddie shook his head. “Ignore her. She’s spoiled.”

Steph scoffed. “I was only playing.” She took one red cup and handed it to Noel, a second to Audrey and one for herself.

Eddie took the last one and held it up in a toast. “Thank you Audrey and Noel to treating us to a lovely hotel room so we could all be together for Christmas this year. Maybe someday we’ll be able to visit you in London the next time we can manage to get more vacation time at work.”

“Well, there’s plenty of room at our house,” Noel spoke, sipping his spiked egg nog. “Aside from our room and Austin’s, there are two others that never get used but only one of those two has a bed in it. It’s yours if you want to visit.”

“You’d love it. There’s a lot to do,” Audrey commented. “Shows, restaurants, lots of sightseeing, the pubs are fantastic haunts.”

“We’re definitely going to aim for that to be our next big vacation,” Eddie insisted.

“Totally,” Steph agreed. “I want to ride that Ferris wheel and drink tea in a posh restaurant.”

“The London Eye,” Audrey corrected with a smile. “I love it. You can see everything for miles in the capsules. And there are many places to have tea.”

The two couples carried on for only about an hour or two longer, chatting and listening to music, before Eddie and Steph bid them goodnight and returned to their own suite. They took the bottle of rum back with them, or what was left of it, but the carton of egg nog was empty so Audrey tossed it into the waste basket along with the four plastic cups. Noel had wandered into the bedroom and began stripping out of his clothes until he was in nothing more than his underwear and socks, pulling down the covers to the bed. He walked around to the other side of the bed from where he had been to sit down and play with the alarm clock.

“What time do you want to get up in the morning?” he asked. “Do we need to be at your sister’s house at any specific time?”

Audrey turned off the lights to the kitchen and sitting room and stepped inside to the bedroom, pulling her sweater off from over her head and tossing it to the floor before unbuttoning her dress pants. “Maybe eight,” she replied, shimmying out of said pants until they pooled around her ankles. Stepping out of them, she walked around to the side of the bed opposite from Noel and climbed up onto it before sitting down. “I don’t think it was discussed what time to come over tomorrow. I mean, I assume the kids will be up early, possibly at the ass crack of dawn, to open their gifts, but we don’t need to be there to witness it. We have our rental car and Eddie and Steph drove here in their own car so they can go over whenever they want, same as us. It’s our Christmas, too. It doesn’t have to revolve around anyone else.”

Audrey pulled her socks off and unhooked her bra while Noel sat with his back to her, setting the alarm for eight in the morning. She then crawled up to him so that she could wrap her arms around his shoulders with her bare breasts pressed to his bare back. He smirked at the touch and turned his head slightly to try and look at her.

“Do you have naughty thoughts in your head that will cause Santa to leave you coal?” he joked.

“They’re so naughty, Santa’s going to leave me an entire coal mine.”

Noel twisted his body and curled an arm around Audrey’s waist so that he could pin her down to the mattress. “I love how your mind works.”

“Because it’s usually in the gutter?”

Noel simply snickered and kissed her; somehow finding a way to burrow them both underneath the blankets without having to come up for air.

“Christmas sex?” It sound like she was asking a question, but it could’ve very well been a statement or a demand.

“Christmas sex,” he replied with a nod.



Audrey and Noel woke the next morning, well after their alarm went off. Noel thought he had hit snooze but he had apparently turned it all the way off. When he finally looked at the time, it was ten after ten and Audrey noticed she had a two voicemails from Crystal and her mother when she turned her phone back on. They were both wondering when they were coming over. The second call had come from Crystal, mentioning that Eddie and Steph had already arrived and they were all having breakfast together and wondering if Audrey and Noel would be joining them.

Audrey rolled her eyes. Her sister and mother always had a way of making her feel guilty about some sort of family thing if she wasn’t there when everyone else was. Considering no times had been discussed, Audrey chose to ignore the call a bit longer; at least until she was more awake.

Noel had sat up and reached to the floor for his underwear, putting it back on one leg at a time before getting up and going into the sitting room where they had bought a tiny poinsettia plant in place of a Christmas tree in their hotel suite. They had placed their gifts for the others and for themselves around the plant and now he was there, kneeling amongst them all and calling for Audrey to join him. She had thrown her underwear on, too, and reached for the robe she had brought with her, tying it around her waist before stepping out of the bedroom. She sat down, Indian-style, on the floor and smiled sleepy-eyed at Noel.

She couldn’t help but find herself completely dumbstruck whenever she looked at him.

Even with tousled hair from late night sex and sleep that followed and with his own sleepy eyes and slight five o’clock shadow, he took her breath away. He could have eyes caked with sleep crust and dried boogers hanging from his nose and he would still enchant her.

“Let’s open our gifts,” he announced.

“You’re like a kid,” she laughed. “It’s so refreshing.”

Handing her a gift, he just smiled in return. “Happy Christmas from me.”

Audrey took the package from him and ripped the paper at the corners, tearing the gift wrap away to reveal a box containing a pair of Burberry rose-colored Aviator sunglasses.

“You mentioned in passing a few weeks ago that you wanted a new pair of Aviators but I noticed you never ended up buying any, so I thought those would be perfect and funny, because then you had your new Aviators and you could ‘look at the world with rose-colored glasses.’”

Audrey snickered, taking the sunglasses out of the box and setting them upon her face, staring back at Noel. “I love them,” she smiled. “They must match my hair pretty well.”

“They do,” Noel nodded.

Audrey then reached forward, scouring the presents and handing him one from her. “Here, your turn.”

Noel pulled the gift wrap away to find he was holding a box from Victoria’s Secret and he looked pretty confused. Opening the box up, he pushed aside the tissue paper and lifted out a red lace push-up bra and matching thong and garter skirt. “Do you want me to wear this? Is this a hint that you want to get into some pretty kinky shit?” he smirked.

“No, dumbass; it’s for me to wear and you to see me in before you take it all off me.”

He gave her the cheekiest grin ever and leaned forward to kiss her. “I can’t wait to unwrap that present.” Noel knelt back down on his feet, but shifted around so that he, too, was sitting Indian-style like her. He handed her two gifts this time to open and just sat there to watch.

The first of the two was a much larger box. Inside was a Michael Kors dot-stud tote. He instructed there was something else inside the tote, so she opened it up to find a matching dotted wallet. She kissed him in thanks and went to open the other gift, which ended up being a pair of Tiffany solitaire diamond earrings.

“Wow, you really went high end with me this year.”

“Only the best for the best,” he shrugged.

“I’d be happy with a box of pizza rolls and a snap bracelet,” Audrey teased. “I don’t think I’m used to getting such fancy things from people yet. I still find it weird I can buy things like this on my own.”

“Yeah, it is a bit daunting at times, innit?”

Audrey nodded. “Definitely.” She handed him another gift, since they were taking turns going back and forth.

It was a deeper box than the one she’d given him the lingerie in and inside were two outfits. There were two pairs of skinny jeans; one pair had black and white stripes and the other was grey leopard print. Then there were the two shirts; a white tee with Mick Jagger on it and the other was also a white tee with an Oscar Wilde quote that she said sounded befitting of Noel.

I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a word of what I am saying.

“I have another gift for you but it’s back home in London. It’s pretty much stationary.”

Noel knitted his brow together. “You got me stationary?”

Audrey tutted. “No. Stationary; as in it’s immobile. It can’t be moved.”

“Oh,” Noel nodded. “Yeah, I kinda have another gift for you, too, but it’s not ready.”

“What, did you order something and it didn’t come in yet?”

Noel shook his head and leaned back on his hands. “No. I just don’t want to give it to you just yet.”

“Well, now you’re gonna have me in suspense.”

“Good things come to those who wait.”

Audrey balled up some discarded gift wrap and threw it at his head. “Shut up, Confucius.”

Squinting his eyes and speaking with his best impression of a Chinese accent, Noel leaned forward and pressed his palms together. “Confucius say, give me a kiss or I take all your gifts back to the store tomorrow.”

Giggling, Audrey threw herself at Noel this time; tackling him backward to the floor and kissing him square on the lips. For a moment, they just laid there, with her sprawled out on top of him. He pushed her hair out of her face and gripped both sides of her face with his hands. They kissed once again and then she just dropped her head to his shoulder and they snuggled like that for a few more moments.

“I think I should call my sister and let her know we’ll be over in a little while,” Audrey spoke, breaking the silence.

“Alright.”

But neither moved.

Audrey lifted her head and rested her chin on his chest and Noel tilted his head up slightly to look back at her.

“In a few minutes,” Audrey added, wrapping her arms around Noel.



That night, after Christmas dinner at Crystal’s house and exchanging gifts with each other, the adults were sitting around the dining room table while the kids were in the living room playing with their new toys. A game of Cards Against Humanity was being played; a very non-Christmas game if ever there was one. Noel was seated between Audrey (as to be expected) and Jeremy, holding several white cards in his hand and nursing a bottle of Labatt Blue. The only other time he’d ever had that particular brand of beer was once when he was at a bar in Toronto after a gig, and he still found it rather enjoyable.

Jeremy was winning the current round of the card game and was red in the face from the amount of beers he’d already had in the last few hours. He was easily drunk, but a functioning one and not in the least bit mean. The men in Audrey’s family all seemed the same at the moment: bordering on drunk or already there, while keeping their wits about them but being a bit more emotional and touchy-feely.

Audrey commented later on that, while her family was quite close and loved each other dearly, that when drunk, the men seemed to get more emotional and affectionate than was normal, whereas the women seemed to get bolder and horny with their men. It was a torrid mix. Crystal had overheard this explanation and agreed wholeheartedly with it.

“How do you think I got pregnant with Tristan so soon after we got married?” Crystal joked. “We weren’t planning on starting a family that soon. It was New Year’s and I was drunk and I was on Jeremy like white on rice.”

Audrey covered her ears and winced. “I don’t want that image in my head. Shut your cake hole.”

Noel could only smile and eye Audrey mischievously. “I can vouch for how Audrey gets when she’s drunk. I’ve had plenty of firsthand experiences and I am still here today to tell the tale.”

“Don’t you dare tell any tales.”

“He can tell me and Steph,” Jeremy piped up, turning in his chair. “We’re just the in-laws. We married into the family so picturing Audrey naked wouldn’t gross us out like it would you Woods.”

Crystal swatted her husband. “Ew, no.”

Jeremy gestured between himself and Crystal. “We got a million tales.”

“All of which I don’t want to know,” spoke their father Lou as he pulled himself to his feet to get a new beer from the kitchen. “Anyone want another?” He looked at Noel. “Noel? You want another or are you good?”

“I’m not driving anywhere,” Noel shrugged. “I’ll have another, thanks.” After a moment, Noel’s gaze followed after Lou and a thought came into his head. “Wait, I’ll come with you.” Noel stood up, pushing his chair back in the process and followed after the older man.

When they both got to the kitchen, Lou opened the fridge door an pulled out a beer for himself and a beer for Noel.

“Here ya go,” Lou said.

“Thanks, uh…Lou?”

“Yeah?”

“I need to ask you something real quick while I have the chance.”

“Shoot.”

“Um…” Noel hesitated. “Let’s go in the garage. I don’t want anyone to overhear.”

Lou narrowed his eyes at the Brit, seemed to show a faint smirk on his lips and then nodded toward the door that connected the kitchen to the garage. “Alright, c’mon.”

Noel followed Lou inside to the garage, closing the door behind them. He looked back at it, hoping no one had followed them to the kitchen and could hear them speaking at all from where they were.

“Uh, well, I know you and I have only talked to and seen each other a few times in the last year so we don’t really know each other well enough, and I know I’ve only been dating Audrey for just over a year, but I want you to know that I love your daughter more than anything in the world and I will never do anything to hurt her. My life’s ambition has altered in that I just want to see her happy.” He inhaled a shaky breath and bit his lip for a moment, thinking how to continue. “I just…I admit I’ve had two other serious relationships before with women I loved, but with Audrey, it’s like third time’s a charm, y’know? She’s this…mythical creature who wandered into my life and made it ten times better. Like, before her, I thought my life was a colorful life but now, looking back, I realize it was dull then. It’s the brightest it will ever be with her.”

“Did you talk to Jeremy about how he asked for my permission to marry Crystal?” Lou interrupted.

“Well, yeah, it did come up yesterday.”

“I’ll tell you the same thing I told him twelve years ago when he asked me: don’t ask me,” he spoke, his eyes softening. “I’m not the one you want to marry and spend your life with, so it’s not my permission you need. It’s Audrey’s. If she’s the moon to your stars or whatever, tell her what you told me and ask her to marry you. Who cares what I think?” Lou shrugged. “You only have to see me on major holidays here and there.”

Noel chuckled and nodded. “You’ll be my family, though, if she says yes.”

Lou snorted. “If,” he laughed. “As if Audrey will say no to you.”

“You think she’ll say yes?”

“Of course she will. Whenever you two were apart for weeks here and there, she always talked about you and the things you did together. She’s over the moon for you. You make her happy too, and if my daughter is happy and in love, then I’m happy. Just don’t ever hurt her…”

“Because you’ll break my legs,” Noel finished. “Yeah, there’s a line forming for that, apparently.”

Lou slapped Noel gently on the back. “We done here? The women will get suspicious.”

Noel nodded and smiled. “Yeah. Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it.” Lou stopped. “Literally, don’t mention it. Especially with Jer. I wasn’t as candid with him when he asked to marry Crystal. He might get jealous.”

Noel chuckled once again. “My lips are sealed. But what should we say we were in here doing for so long if the rest of them ask?”

Lou shrugged. “Getting beers and shooting the shit.” Then he added, “KISS.”

“Excuse me?”

“Keep it simple stupid.”

“Oh, I get it. Right, let’s go back,” Noel smiled.

Both men reentered the house with their beers in hand and walked back to the dining room. No one seemed to really care that they’d been gone a few minutes longer than normal. Except for Jeremy, however. He seemed to easily catch on to what had gone down because of the conversation he’d had with Noel the day before. He just gave Noel a nod of the head and raised his beer as if in salute. Noel widened his eyes as if trying to mentally urge the younger man to shut the fuck up in case he slipped and said something in his hammered holiday state.

“Good; you two are back from getting your beers from the Great White North,” Jeremy announced, directing it at Lou and Noel. “Who’s up for another round of the card game for horrible people?”

Noel smirked and returned to his seat beside Audrey, leaning toward her and kissing the side of her face. “Love you,” he whispered in her ear.

Audrey turned to look at him and smiled. She focused her eyes on his, and then down his face to his lips. “Love ya, too,” she mouthed silently.

From across the table, Lou watched his eldest daughter happily interact with the man she loved and who loved her back and his heart swelled.