A Mighty Need

After the birthday shenanigans were over, it was back to “real life” for Noel and Audrey. He was writing furiously for the third series of Luxury Comedy and going on meetings, all in regard to the show. Audrey had her first Skype session with Eric and as well as with the other writers of What Girls Do to discuss where the second season would go. Based on how Audrey knew the first season ended and with where she and the other writers and Eric talked about, she was able to put pen to paper rather easily and bang out the first draft of the script in a couple of days. It was easy to do, also, because Noel wasn’t home most of those days. Austin had gone with Noel to some of his meetings as well, so there was no one to distract her, aside from the cats, but they didn’t exactly count.

Audrey was in constant contact with her Editorial Project Manager (EPM), Acquisitions Editor and Production Project Manager (PPM) and by June, information and detailed metadata about her book was released six months ahead of publication to begin driving interest and pre-order sales. It was always exciting time for Audrey; the prospect a new book brought.

When July rolled around, Audrey had paid for her parents to fly to London for a nice, week-long visit. She had hired a car to pick them up from the airport and during their stay they finally got to meet Noel’s parents. They all went out to eat at Gillray’s Steakhouse and Bar at County Hall, on the South Bank. It had a great view across the Thames of Big Ben, the Houses of Parliament and Westminster Bridge. Both sets of parents hit it off so well that they made plans to get together again later on in the week, just the four of them without Noel or Audrey. After dinner the six of them went to ride the London Eye together before Noel’s parents parted ways. They rode the tube back to Highgate, to give Lou and Mary another London experience. Noel took the opportunity to comment that his parents meeting up with Audrey’s parents later in the week.

“It’s like tonight was a play date we set them up on and they got on so well, they want to play again.”

Audrey smirked and linked her arm with Noel’s as they sat there across from her parents; her mother eyeing her up with a smile. The next day, Audrey and Austin took their parents sightseeing to the Tower of London, outside Buckingham Palace, inside Westminster Abbey and paddle boating around The Serpentine in Hyde Park. They returned to North London in time for dinner at The Cambridge in Soho, a block away from Maison Bertaux, where Noel would be meeting them afterward to show them his displayed art. The following day, they joined Audrey and Austin in visiting Noel on the set of Luxury Comedy. While there, Audrey got a text message from Eric, telling her that the Emmy Award nominations had been announced and What Girls Do had snagged a few, including Outstanding Comedy Series, Directing in a Comedy Series, Writing in a Comedy Series, Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series and Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series. Those were just the main nominations; there were minor ones for the more technical side, but not as thrilling.

Still, Audrey jumped out of her seat and squealed. Noel was only talking to Ameena, the costume designer, and not taping, so she was able to freely run over to him and let him know the good news. He congratulated her and pulled her in for a big hug and kiss, and then announced to everyone the good news as well.

“Tonight, we’ll celebrate.”

“Tonight my mom and dad are going out with your mom and dad.”

Noel just wiggled his eyebrows at her. “I know.”

Smiling, Audrey playfully shoved him and then reached a hand around to pinch his ass.

“I definitely just got that on camera,” said Geraint, one of the camera operators.

“Oy, you’re not supposed to be filming right now. We’re on a half hour break,” Noel whined. Then his snickered and stuck his ass out. “At least make sure you’re using wide lens to get it all in.”

That night, true to his word, after Lou and Mary took a mini cab Noel hired for them and sent Austin to the movies or something, Noel threw Audrey over his shoulder and carried her upstairs to their bedroom. While she sat on the bed, he turned on the iPod in its docking station and the first song that began to play was ‘I Believe in a Thing Called Love’ by The Darkness. He then ducked into the closet, closing the door behind him and leaving Audrey confused about what he was up to.

No more than a minute later the door to the closet opened and out came one of Noel’s legs; utterly bare except for one of his white, knee-high platform boots. He briefly poked his head out to make sure she was watching, which she was with an amused smiled on her face.

“What are you up to, Noel?” she queried.

“I’m not Noel. I’m Peppermint Paul, the exotic dancer he hired to help you celebrate your show’s Emmy nominations,” he said with a lisp that made him sound a bit like his brother.

Audrey busted out laughing. She leaned forward and knelt on the bed, watching as he slowly stepped out of the closet wearing his gold, Sunflash mini skirt and a black dress shirt that was opened and tied across his chest like a midriff. Around his neck was a white, feather boa which he twirled around as he sashayed out further into the bedroom. He began to dance to the rest of ‘I Believe in a Thing Called Love’, turning around and shaking his ass at her, an when he leaned over a bit, she could see he was wearing no underwear and she squealed with laughter.

“Oh my God, I cannot think of a better way to celebrate such good news than with my own, personal exotic stripper,” she boasted.

“Dancer,” he corrected.

Audrey pouted, “Aww, you mean you’re not gonna get naked for me? Build me up just to let me down, why don’t you.”

“Getting naked costs extra,” Noel remarked, not missing a beat as he twirled around more expertly in those damned boots than she ever could.

“How much?”

Noel approached her, taking the boa off from around his neck and throwing it around hers while shaking his narrow hips seductively in front of her. “How much you got, pretty lady?”

“As much as it takes to get that ass in this bed,” Audrey remarked, when suddenly an idea popped into her head. “Don’t move.”

She jumped off the bed and ran into the bathroom for a moment, and then she ran back out a moment later with something small in her hand and ducked into the closet. When she resurfaced again, she ran back to the bathroom, now holding an armful of clothes and shut the door behind her. Noel stopped what he was doing and walked over to the iPod, and skipped through the songs to find something else, settling on ‘20th Century Boy’ by T. Rex. Bopping his head to the music, he barely heard the bathroom door reopen. He did hear Audrey clear her throat, however.

Noel turned around and found her standing in the doorway, hands braced on the frame. She was wearing black dress pants, one of his white dress shirts, a tie, and her hair pulled back while one of his top hats rested on her head and on her upper lip she had drawn in a mustache with eyeliner. She puckered her lips at him and raised an eyebrow at him.

“Hey, there, sweetcheeks,” she said to him in her deepest voice possible. “Do you accept Visa or MasterCard?”

Noel grinned back at her. “Sorry, big boy,” he replied with his girly lisp. “Cash only.”

“Aw, c’mon, baby. I’m sure we can work something out. You want jewels? I’ll steal you the Hope diamond. You want cash? I’ll rob a bank. You want fine clothes? I’ll indenture the world’s top designers at your every beck and call.” Audrey sauntered up to him and reached her hands around to grab his ass. “Only the best for you, darling.”

Noel fanned himself with his hand like a coquettish ingénue. “My, my, I’m not used to being offered the world on a silver platter.”

“Well, baby; start getting used to it. It’s the high life for you, from here on out.” Audrey brought her hands up to Noel’s shoulders and forced him to sit down on the bed. “You’re mine now, little lady.”

Noel chuckled. “Well, the tables of this celebration have certainly turned.”

Audrey held his eye as she undid her pants and slipped out of them one foot at a time and then placed the top hat down on his head. She pulled her hair out of her pony tail before shoving Noel back to lie on the bed, causing the top hat to fall off him as he looked back upward at him. Casually, she climbed up over him and his hands were immediately at her thighs, seeking to cause some friction. However, Audrey smacked his hands away.

“Unh-uh,” she muttered.

She leaned forward, undoing his tied up midriff of a dress shirt and opened it wide to reveal his bare chest. Lowering her head, with her hair cascading around her face, Audrey brought her lips to the skin of his chest and kissed her way up to the jugular notch and then along his right clavicle and up his neck to just behind his ear. All the while, his eyes closed to keep from rolling back into his head. He was almost instantly aroused and Audrey could easily sense it against her thigh as he had no underwear on under that gold skirt.

“How strong are your hands?” she asked, purposely moving down against him to drive him nuts.

“Depends on what you need them to do,” he replied, opening his eyes and staring back at her. All the love he had for her was there, but his lust was pushing its way forward and fighting a winning battle for dominance. His breath hitched for a moment as she ground gently down against him, causing him to bite down on his lips.

“See these panties?” she asked, grabbing his hands and placing them on her hips. “Do you think you can manage ripping them off me without hurting me?”

Noel hooked his thumbs through the leg holes and his remaining fingers around the tops at the elastic band and gave a tug to test the sturdiness. “These seem very well made. I’d need scissors to help.”

“No, I want them ripped off me.”

“Not unless you want to have your legs severed from your body at your leg sockets.”

Audrey held a finger at him, signaling for him to wait right there. She hopped off him, much to his displeasure, with his erection quite visible now. He propped himself up on his elbows and let his blue eyes follow after her as she walked over to their dresser. She opened up her underwear drawer and pulled out a thin pair of black lace panties, changing into them after she slipped out of the “sturdy” ones she had been wearing that would’ve caused her dismemberment. Redressed in new panties, she returned to Noel, climbing back onto his lap and sitting down upon him, which only made him groan at the touch.

“These ones will rip easily,” she informed, very sure of herself.

To test that theory, Noel gave a tug at them to get a feel for how sturdy this pair was and found they would definitely rip apart with enough force. He grinned mischievously up at her, reaching his hands up to his dress shirt she was still wearing. Grabbing the material in his hands, he ripped the shirt open first, revealing she was no longer wearing her bra and her lovely, full breasts stared him in the face. Biting her bottom lip, Audrey leaned forward again, this time kissing Noel on the lips. His tongue found its way past her teeth to duel it out with her tongue. She began to rock against his erection, causing him to whimper at the sensation and desperate to be enveloped by her warmth. His face got warm as he pulled back from her and forced her to lean up.

“Sit up,” he spoke, breathily. “I want to see your face.”

She obliged him, leaning back to brace her hands on his legs as he brought his hands to her panties. With a gaze up at her darkened by lust, Noel hooked his fingers around the openings in the lace material and dug his fingers into the material as well to force it to tear slightly. When he had enough leeway, he gave one tug, which caused Audrey to lurch forward slightly, before he tugged once more and the panties came free. Slipping the material from off around her, he tossed them over the side of the bed and sat up quickly to wrap his arms around her waist and flip her over so that she was underneath him.

Adjusting himself, he then grabbed Audrey’s legs to wrap around his as he pushed down and into her, rocking her with him with each deep thrust.

She began to whimper, closing her eyes to focus on how good he made her feel. Noel braced himself, gripping the blankets on the bed tightly in his hands and quickened his pace. Kissing her on the lips, he sighed and began to swivel his hips which only caused Audrey’s whimpers to turn into throaty moans and heavy panting. Sweat was collecting along his hairline as he buried his face into the crook of her neck as he felt tingling at the base of his spine. Noel bit down gently on the skin of her shoulder and groaned as well as he began to lose the battle in containing his orgasm any longer.

Without much warning, he shuddered and came inside her, and he felt like he could breathe again. All he wanted to do by this point was just collapse on top of her but he had promised to celebrate her good news and that, in no way, meant not letting her peak as well. He rode out his orgasm, thrusting deep and fast once he got his bearings. He knew she was close when she tightened up and began to claw at his back, dragging her nails up to his shoulders and gripping them tightly. With a girlish squeal, she came as well; arching her back and then dropping flat onto the bed as she shuddered.

“Oh my God, Noel,” she panted, pushing his hair out of his face and bringing him in for a kiss. “That was, like, the best yet.”

“And just think,” he muttered in between kisses, “we still have a few decades to get even better.”

“Mmm,” she sighed happily.

After a few more moments and allowing their breath to steady and heartbeats to slow, Noel shifted out of her and rolled over, lying beside her on the bed. “Times like this, I wish I still smoked. Would really calm my nerves after the fact. They’re so frazzled right now, but in a good way, I mean.”

“Maybe a warm bath would help.”

“Mmm yeah,” he agreed. “That just means my nerves will go crazy again because baths lead to sex for us, too.”

“I don’t hear a downside.”

Noel chuckled. “I wasn’t stating one.” He rolled to lie on his side and stare at her while stretching an arm out to pull her close to him. “We still have a couple more hours until your parents or Austin would get back. We can utilize any surface in the house.”

“Good point. We should save the bathtub for later tonight.”

“Exactly.”

Audrey turned to meet his gaze while he casually played with her breasts. “Where to, then, Peppermint Paul?”

Noel smirked and narrowed his eyes at her. “Hmm, how about we go down to the basement and I throw something lumpy into the washing machine and we go for a ride?”

Audrey laughed. “That’s one idea.” She turned to lie on her side as well, facing him. “Or, we can rub oil all over ourselves and do it on the entrance hall floor.”

“Where anyone can walk right in and catch us?”

“You said it yourself; we have a few hours to kill.”

“You’re dirty. I like it.”

“No, I’ll be oily. Slippery.” Audrey sat up and bit her lip seductively at him. “Go find some oil.”

“Massage or Canola?”

Audrey laughed again. “Whatever floats your boat, spankybuns.” Getting up off the bed, she pulled his dress shirt closed around her body as she walked, bare-assed, out of the bedroom.

“Canola, it is!” he shouted after her.



A few days later, Audrey’s parents returned to the states and the week after that, her brother Eddie and wife Stephanie flew in. It seemed it was going to be a busy summer, especially since her sister Crystal and Crystal’s family were visiting the following month before the kids went back to school. Audrey and Noel would have a constant full house, but they loved it; more so for Audrey since she rarely saw her own family anymore, Austin aside. She did pretty much all of the same stuff with Eddie and Steph that she did with her parents; taking them to the same places and introducing them to Noel’s parents and brother over dinner one evening. This time, Audrey was able to book enough in advance three tickets to tour Buckingham Palace with her brother and sister-in-law, as Noel was still busy filming. The following day they took got up early to take a bus tour to Stonehenge, Windsor and Bath; not returning back toward London until seven in the evening, where they met up with Noel at The Gatehouse across from Highgate School for a later dinner. It was a nice evening, with Austin there as well; the five of them sitting together with a good meal and drinks afterward.

It was such a wonderfully warm night out they walked back home. Across from The Gatehouse’s Highgate West Hill entrance there sat a floral vendor set up on the corner, starting to close up shop, and Eddie decided to buy Steph a small bouquet mixed with purple tulips and yellow tea roses. Noel did the same, and not because he felt like he had to just because Eddie was doing it. Though, maybe he felt like one-upping Eddie because of how Noel thought Eddie was a bit douchey. He picked out a bouquet of sunflowers and red roses, flowers which held significance for him and Audrey. As the sisters-in-law walked side by side, smelling their flowers and talking animatedly about this and that, Noel and the Woods brothers lumped together and Noel suddenly felt like a fifth wheel, despite Austin technically being that wheel.

Audrey and Noel, and Eddie and Steph, were paired up as couples while Austin was there as a single lad. But Audrey, Eddie and Austin were siblings and Steph was Eddie’s wife. They were all family and had known each other years. Noel was the outsider looking in on this grouping, trying to make his way in. Feeling the way he did at the moment, he suddenly wished his own brother was there.

When they were halfway home, Audrey stopped walking and waited for Noel and the guys to catch up and then she linked her arm through his, resting her head on his shoulder while they walked the rest of the way.

That was what Noel needed; reassurance that he was hers, and she was his. Not that he doubted their loyalty and love for each other, but he needed to belong and be with people. He was a social butterfly, not a fly on the wall, even if he did have his moments where he wanted solitude; like any normal person.

Noel pressed his lips to her head and smiled as they the night breeze blew past them.



After Eddie and Steph had left a few days later, life went back to normal. July was drawing to a close and Noel was almost halfway through filming Luxury Comedy’s third series. He had asked his usual friends to appear as extras again, including Rev, Blacky, Joey Page, Dave, Diva Zappa and Richard Ayoade; the latter reviving his characters of City Gent and the hammerhead shark Ted Lagoonda. Serge was brought back once again for the music end of things but Noel also asked Audrey and Austin to stand in on some scenes. In one scene, Austin was just a random extra walking past, dressed in a parrot costume and wearing a top hat and monocle. He had no lines, but Noel addressed him nonetheless in the scene.

Noel was hiding behind Mike, dressed as Smooth. When Austin was out of frame, Noel stepped back out and gestured at Austin with his thumb.

“What are you doing?” Mike as Smooth asked.

“That’s the Toucan Duke. He’s like avian royalty. Didn’t you see his monocle? Means he’s fancy.”

“Yeah, so?”

“I kinda lost to him during a poker tournament a few years ago and I’ve never paid him back,” Noel commented, sheepishly. “And I may or may not have shagged his sister. He’s none too happy with me.”

Audrey was sitting off camera during the scene and had to cover her mouth to hold her laugh in. Everyone else off screen seemed to be smiling at it, even Austin, who came up beside her and flapped his wings and pretended to peck her with the hooked beak that had been applied to his face by the makeup artist earlier. All that time in makeup, only for three seconds of screen time.

“I think you’ve found your calling,” Audrey teased, nudging her younger brother.

She looked completely different than he did. She was dressed all in black: black leggings, a black dress similar to Wednesday Addams, black boots and a black wig with ringlets all over. Even her skin was painted black. Her lips, however, were painted red. Audrey was sweating though, in the summer heat, and felt as if the body paint was melting from her so she stood in front of an oscillating fan to keep cool. Her character was named Onyx, the “ultimate Goth girl” whose soul was so dark her skin turned black and anything she touches instantly turns Goth.

Audrey’s episode was the same Austin was in, hence why they were both in costume the same day. When it was time for her to film, she walked onto the set to go over her few lines and direction with Nigel Coan, the episode’s director. Noel kept smiling at her the entire time and she gave him devil horns and stuck her tongue out.

When they started to film, she walked into frame, lurking in the corner of the set.

“Oh no,” Noel whined, hiding behind Mike again.

“Now what?”

Noel pointed at Audrey. “That’s Onyx.”

“Who’s she?”

“The ultimate Goth girl. Legend has it her lover spurned her and she went so dark her skinned turned black as night and now anything she touches turns Goth.”

“What about the floor? She’s touching the floor and it’s not turned Goth.”

“I don’t make the rules.”

“You kinda do.”

“Hide me.”

“Why? What’ve you done this time?”

“I may or may not be her former lover.”

“The one who spurned her?”

“Maybe.”

“What happens if she touches someone who’s already a Goth?”

Noel stood up straight and put his hands on his hips, pretending like he was thinking. “They turn anti-Goth.”

“What’s anti-Goth?”

“Someone who’s pale all white, even down to every hair on their body. Kinda like that vanilla rapist in the sky.” Noel gestured upward and the camera panned up for a few moments. The Moon would be edited in later, claiming offense to Noel’s remark. When the camera panned back to Mike and Noel, the latter winced as Audrey neared them. “Oh, here she comes.”

“Hi, Noel,” she said in a rather pleasant tone.

“Hi, Onyx,” he replied shyly.

“Are we still on for tennis on Sunday?”

Noel nodded. “Sure thing.”

“Great,” Audrey smiled. “Bye.”

As Audrey walked off the set, Noel wiped his brow. “Did you see that? I barely escaped turning into a Goth with my life.”

Mike just shook his head. “I think you’re off your rocker. That’s not her normal skin. It looked like paint.”

Noel looked confused. “Oh, yeah, she was in an unfortunate painting accident. It stained her skin.”

“You’re an idiot.” Mike went to exit the set, which was made to look like some sort of city park, waving Noel off.

“Can you bring me back a cuppa tea? Please?”

Mike just grumbled and continued to walk away.

Nigel then called for end of the scene. The cameras stopped rolling and both Mike and Audrey walked back onto the set. Noel grabbed Audrey by the hand and kissed her, getting only a bit of the black paint on her transferring to his hands and onto his face.

“Am I done?” she asked. “Do we have to redo that at all?”

Noel shook his head. “No, that was great.” He looked over at Nigel. “That was fine, right?”

“Yeah, everyone hit their marks, there were no missed beats or flubbed lines.”

“Why don’t you get this shit washed off? It’ll take a while to remove,” Noel suggested, referring to the body paint.

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” she smirked planting a kiss on his cheek and transferring red lip marks onto his skin. “Next time, give me a part where I’m not…this.” Audrey pulled the black wig off, revealing her red hair pinned up under a hair cap.

“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, kissing her back.

It really did seem like it took forever to get the body paint off of her neck, face and hands. Days later, Audrey was still finding bits in different nooks and crannies. And true to his word, Noel gave Audrey another part in the show, this time as just an extra, sitting on a park bench with Dolly, but done up to look like an old woman, feeding Dave, who was flapping around on the ground, dressed like an over-sized pigeon.



At the beginning of August, Crystal, Jeremy and the kids flew in to London. Once again, Noel’s parents joined them all for dinner to meet Audrey’s sister and family, but this time they had ordered pizza and stayed at home. Noel took Jeremy and Tristan with him one afternoon to the Luxury Comedy set while Audrey took Crystal and Avery to the Savoy for afternoon tea and then for mani-pedis afterward. They all met up for dinner at Brasserie Blanc at the Covent Garden Market, sitting on the outdoor patio at two separate tables because they didn’t all fit at one.

The next day Crystal and Jeremy went off alone to explore the city, so Audrey, Noel and Austin took the kids; Noel having taken a day away from filming strictly for this reason. Early in the day they went to the Sea Life Aquarium where they also grabbed lunch, and then for a ride on the London eye, which both children got the biggest kick out of. When they made their way back toward central London by way of the Hungerford Bridge, Avery complained that her feet were tired of walking, so Noel knelt down and let the nearly six-year-old girl climb onto his back and then sit on his shoulders. When she was safely atop him, he grabbed onto her ankles to make sure she stayed put when he stood back up. To keep from falling backward, she placed her small hands on his head and they continued to walk along, with soon-to-be ten-year-old Tristan searching for his Aunt Audrey’s hand to hold. Austin walked behind them, making fart noises to make his niece and nephew laugh.

When they reached Piccadilly Circus, they grabbed a double-decker bus and sat on the upper deck which the kids got the biggest kick out of. The rode it until Oxford Street and hopped off, and continued to walk west a few blocks to the Disney Store. The kids got to run around and pick out one costume and one toy each they liked. Tristan didn’t care about a costume, but chose the Iron Man pajamas, while Avery really wanted the Tinkerbell costume and to wear it right away. After purchasing their outfits and toys (Tristan’s new Lightning McQueen remote control car and Avery’s new Sleeping Beauty doll), they went across the street to grab dinner at the Subway restaurant, but first Audrey took Avery into the bathroom so she could change into her costume. They then all grabbed the tube back to Highgate, to give the kids that experience.

The remainder of the week, Crystal and her family got to see Noel’s studio in Soho and his displayed art at Maison Bertaux a few blocks away. They made a big family style meal of spaghetti their last night there and sat around watching a kid-friendly movie. Once the kids were in bed, the adults sat up, talking around the dining room table over glasses of wine or bottles of beer, chatting about life, the kids, Crystal’s family’s visit and future plans for Noel and Audrey’s wedding which was now only slightly more than a year away. Crystal said it was getting to crunch time if they wanted to book a venue to have the service and/or reception and so friends and family of Noel’s could book their flights and possible hotel stays, depending on who would be able to be put up by Audrey’s Philly family and friends.

Once Crystal and her family were gone, Audrey and Noel did, in fact, sit down the following week and start to outline what they wanted to do for a wedding, but Audrey realized she had no idea how to plan a wedding from thirty-five hundred miles away. They tried looking at venue websites, but pictures didn’t do any of them justice. After a few weeks of going back and forth about it, they decided to hire a wedding planner to help take care of everything when Audrey and Noel couldn’t be there in person to.



The following month, a few days before Audrey’s birthday, she and Noel flew out to Philadelphia for their first meeting, face to face, with their wedding planner, Sharlice. She took them to a few locations in the city and on the outskirts as well, but Audrey and Noel both agreed they wanted to keep it in the city so any guests flying in and staying in the city would have an easier time of traveling to whatever venue. They also agreed they wanted to have the ceremony and reception in the same place but, during the in-between, there would be a few cocktail hours where Audrey and Noel, along with their wedding party, went off for pictures to be taken elsewhere. The plan was also for Audrey and her girls to spend the night before at a hotel, where they would get ready. Noel and his boys would stay the night and get ready the next morning at another hotel. It was one of many bills they were footing, although, despite them making much more than both their parents, Audrey’s father insisted on paying for whatever venue they chose.

“I paid for your sister’s wedding,” Lou had told her over the phone. “I should be able to contribute to my eldest daughter’s wedding, too.”

Her parents were also taking care of paying for the limo services Audrey and Noel would require for the to and fro; from the hotels, to the venue for the ceremony, to any photography locations, and then back to the venue for the reception. At the end of the night, Audrey and Noel would take a limo back to whatever hotel they were staying in for their wedding night before they flew out the next day for their honeymoon; a location they had yet to decide on.

Noel and Audrey celebrated her 34th birthday out to dinner with her longtime friends Val and Julie, and their husbands, both of whom were men named Joe. Audrey told them about the wedding plans so far, life in London, her upcoming book release and the Emmy Awards she’d be going to the following Sunday. Val and Julie talked about their lives as well, and how their jobs and children were doing and Audrey cooed over the pictures they showed her. The next morning, Audrey and Noel went to Val’s home in the nearby suburb of Upper Darby, where Audrey finally got to see Val’s kids again after so long. She couldn’t believe how big they were. Val’s oldest was going to be six like Avery and the youngest had just turned three. They stayed until dinner time but had to leave because Noel had to be back in London by Tuesday. He had filmed his first episode of Never Mind The Buzzcocks’ 29th series the day before they flew out to the States. The second episode was to be filmed in another two days. He was already going to be away for the third episode because of the Emmy’s. He wasn’t planning on rushing back to the UK the day after the awards show and celebrations that would follow. He’d probably be too hunger and dead to the world to manage getting on a plane.

That Friday, however, Audrey and Noel were LA-bound once more. Audrey had scheduled a fitting for a dress she planned to wear, while Noel would be wearing something similar to what he wore on their first Halloween together; sans the ghoulish makeup and fangs, of course. He had brought up getting fitted for a tux which seemed to horrify Audrey.

“You will do no such thing,” she jested. “I want the real you there. Not the Hollywood equivalent. And if anyone has anything to say about it, they can say hello to my foot when it’s lodged so far up their ass that my toes are tickling their throat.”

Noel snickered. “That was all sorts of visual.”

Austin, unfortunately, wouldn’t be unable to attend the event since Audrey could only bring one guest, and Noel was it. They also wouldn’t be there long enough to “require Austin’s services.” It didn’t mean she didn’t feel bad, though; not being able to bring her brother, after all the hard work he’d done for her. So, she paid for him to fly home to Philadelphia for the week to catch up with his friends whom he hadn’t seen in months.

The day of the Emmy’s, Noel and Audrey spent the morning having breakfast in their hotel suite at the Ritz-Carlton, thanks to room service, making love in the shower afterward, and then Audrey got ready for the Emmy’s with the hotel’s Red Carpet Ready spa experience package. It started began with a 50-minute ‘Champagne and Shimmer Body Treatment’, before she was whisked away for an indulgent 40-minute ‘Signature Manicure’ and 50-minute ‘Signature Pedicure’. Her red carpet look was completed with hairstyling and make-up application by one of the hotel’s celebrity stylists. The hair and make-up portion was done upstairs in the hotel suite where Audrey’s dress had been delivered and where Noel was currently walking around in just his pants and socks.

Noel smiled sheepishly when Audrey returned with the stylist. “Sorry,” he muttered, covering his arms across his chest as if he was a woman caught topless on a public beach. He darted into the bedroom, returning moments later with his shirt on and only buttoned up halfway for the time being.

Audrey took a seat at a table so the stylist could work her magic while Noel looked at his cell phone and informed her that the limo picking them up would be arriving at four. When her red carpet look was acquired, Audrey found Noel was now fully dressed and staring at her.

“And the award for best looking woman goes to…” he remarked, causing Audrey to blush and the stylist to smile.

“Flattery will get you everywhere, Mr. Fielding,” Audrey quipped.

“Don’t I know it,” he laughed.

When the stylist left, Audrey went into the bedroom to grab her dress out of its garment bag, and smiled. “Noel, can you help zip me up once I have this thing on.”

“Of course.”

It was a classy black number with a bit of an edge to it. She just couldn’t bring herself to go with the typical Hollywood glamor because she wasn’t Hollywood. She was a writer who spent her twenties listening to almost nothing but Green Day and was now roped into Hollywood events. She lived in London and was away from the superficiality of Hollywood and she planned to keep it that way. It was another reason why she couldn’t have Noel begrudgingly wear a tuxedo or designer dress suit; of course, unless he wanted to. She wanted Noel to stay Noel, just as she wanted to stay herself.

When her dress was on, with her strapless bra somehow holding her in place, Noel zipped her dress up and brought her heels over to her for her to step into.

“I look like a Gothic Cinderella,” she remarked, looking at her reflection in the mirror.

Noel just smiled and handed Audrey her purse as well. “Your wallet, phone and some mints are in your clutch,” he said. “Did you need anything else?”

Audrey shrugged. “I don’t think so.” Then she smiled. “Only just you.”

“Well, that you already have.”

A call came up to their suite from the front desk, informing them that their limo was there. On the elevator ride down, they ended up sharing with Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy, who were both staying at the Ritz-Carlton, having come in for the Emmy’s from New York City. Claire was nominated for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series, an award she had already won in the past, so this night was no stranger to her, but it was Claire who was starstruck when she realized who Audrey was. Both their shows (Claire’s Homeland and Audrey’s What Girls Do) were on the same network, so Claire was more than familiar with Audrey’s. An added bonus was that she had read and loved Audrey’s first two books and had her first novel on pre-order.

“Seriously?” Audrey wondered with amusement. She always found it very strange when celebrities knew who she was and were fans of hers.

“Yeah, I love them and if I had them with me I’d be a total fangirl and have you sign them for me,” Claire insisted. “What after-party are you going to tonight? I didn’t see you at the Showtime pre-Emmy Party last night.”

“Yeah, we didn’t even know about that.”

“Oh my god, no one told you?”

“I’m sure someone sent an invite, but with not getting in till late on Friday, we just spent the day here yesterday relaxing. Going to get my dress fitted was the only time I left.”

Noel leaned forward. “Both you ladies look phenomenal.”

Hugh nodded in agreement. “You took the words right out of my mouth.”

“Oh, yeah, uh,” Audrey remembered Claire’s first question. “We’re just going to the Governor’s Ball, I think.”

“Oh, cool,” Claire nodded. “We’ll be there, too.”

Both couples reached the lobby and made their way to a private front drive entrance where two limos were waiting for them. Claire and Hugh got into the first one and Noel and Audrey were shown to the second one. The drive literally lasted maybe a minute because all the limos did was go around the block to the Nokia Theater which was located behind the hotel. The drive was still necessary because the girls couldn’t just walk there in their gowns. The pre-show was all about the arrivals and walking the red carpet to be interviewed and photographed, looking suave and not sweating from walking in Southern California heat.

And an arrival is just what Audrey and Noel gave them.

Handlers opened the doors for them so the drivers could just drop them off and go to allow other limos to get in an out. Noel stepped out first, adjusting his jacket before turning to give Audrey her hand and help her out.

This was a much bigger affair than the premiere for What Girls Do six months earlier. For one, this was being televised live all over the country and streamed live on the internet as well. People from other countries could watch as well. It was such a blur, though. The second Audrey’s heels touched the red carpet and the reality of being at the Emmy Awards for something she created was nominated several times for made her mind just about melt where the heat couldn’t succeed. She remembered waving over to Claire and Hugh, who were a few paces in front of them and had turned around to smile at Audrey and Noel. As she walked further along, gripping her clutch purse in one hand and Noel’s hand with the other, Audrey took it all in and felt like hyperventilating.

And then she realized something.

Oh my God, if my show wins for Outstanding Comedy Series or Outstanding Writing, I’ll have to go up onto the stage, won’t I? Especially for the writing award because it was the Pilot episode that had been submitted. Oh, god. I didn’t prepare a speech and there will be so many people. I’m gonna die.

Noel squeezed her hand and she looked at him with a relieved smile.

But he’s here, she thought. Just look at him if it happens.

The two of them had no idea what they were doing so they just followed whatever Claire and Hugh were doing. They were shown to a white Emmy’s backdrop where paparazzi were barricaded off many feet away, screaming and shouting the names of other on the carpet ahead of them; to look their way or asking questions from afar. It was utter chaos. Audrey walked along and stopped; her heart racing as she posed and looked at all of them with their cameras flashing, but she just kept smiling. Noel joined her a moment later, taking her hand and walking further along before she stopped again for the batch of paps toward the end. Noel placed his arm around Audrey’s waist, content with all this because he had been to similar events before and he could just sense she was nervous.

Finally she got away, moving on with Noel toward the bulk of where everyone was congregating outside. It wasn’t as packed yet since they were some of the early arrivals. There were red ropes tying off areas where photographers were only allowed to go and to keep any Joe Schmoe from crashing from off the street. Sure, there was security standing around, but every bit helped. There were cameras all over, filming the red carpet arrivals and interviewers from talk shows and specific networks positioned all over. It literally was just organized chaos.

Audrey got pulled over by Entertainment Tonight correspondent Brooke Anderson. She was asked the usual questions about who she was wearing, meaning who designed her dress, if she was nervous, and what other shows she was a fan of. Brooke then took her hand and showed Audrey’s engagement ring off to the camera.

“Wowza,” Brooke chuckled. “And who’s the lucky guy?”

Audrey turned and pointed at Noel who was standing down below the ET interview platform. “Noel Fielding; that man right there,” she smiled.

Brooke beckoned for Noel to come up to the platform and join them. “C’mon, we don’t bite,” she said, gesturing to the other correspondents, Rocsi Diaz and Joe Zee. Noel obliged them, sidling up next to Audrey. “So you’re Audrey’s fiancé?”

“Yeah,” he replied. “That’s me, her cheeky monkey.”

“Are you excited for Audrey tonight?”

“More than you can believe.”

“When can we expect wedding bells?” Joe Zee asked.

“Next year,” Audrey replied vaguely. They didn’t need to know the details.

“Well, congratulations on the upcoming wedding and good luck tonight,” Brooke spoke with a smile in her voice and plastered on her face.

“And you look gorgeous, too. Absolutely stunning,” Rocsi gushed, blandly.

Ugh, Hollywood fakes.

“Both of you,” Joe added.

Audrey and Noel continued on after that, with her dragged into a few more interviews before they were finally able to get inside the Nokia Theater and were ushered to their seats. Other celebrities were shown to their seats shortly after or were already there. Audrey pulled her cell phone out to call Austin, then her parents, and both said they had just seen her and Noel arriving and her giving an interview for the Fox correspondents, as Fox was the network broadcasting the Emmy’s this year. Noel called home as well but it was after midnight back in London, meaning early Monday morning, so he didn’t bother his parents, only his brother.

Audrey had overheard that most everyone was given two guest tickets, which pissed her off a bit because then she could’ve brought Austin. She mentioned as much to Noel, who assured her it was fine.

“It’s because I’m a nobody and they don’t have to kiss my ass like they do the big name celebrities,” Audrey snipped.

“After tonight, more people are going to know your name and they will be kissing your ass till Kingdom come.”

Eventually the show was starting, with Ryan Seacrest as host because, again, Fox was broadcasting the award show. As the show began with the opening number and other bullshit, it was on to the first award, for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series, of which Juliette was nominated. The brunette was sitting in the row in front of Audrey and Noel and as the nominees’ names were being read, Audrey leaned forward and gave Juliette a squeeze.

“And the Emmy goes to…”

Moments of tenseness as the presenters opened the envelope.

“Juliette Lewis, What Girls Do.”

Juliette squealed, swore and turned around to look at Audrey, who stood up with Juliette and hugged her. She then moved out of her seat and hurried up to the stage as fast as she could in her dress and heels. At the microphone, she was handed the golden statuette and then she turned to face the audience.

“If this was airing on Showtime right now I would be swearing up a storm, but I’m gonna keep it as short and classy as I can,” she began, and the audience laughed.

Audrey’s stomach was doing flip-flops. She looked at Noel and she grinned at him; so happy for their friend and how the first award of the night went to someone from her show!

“I can thank so many people but there’s so little time. The other fine ladies I work with: Heather, Hannah and Cherie. You bitches are gorgeous and talented and I loved working with you. To my parents for birthing me or else I wouldn’t be here, uh…oh, my brother who’s here with me and is my rock. Mostly, I want to thank Audrey, whose books inspired this show and who’s creative direction early on when the show was given the green light allowed me to have such a fantastic character and I thank you a million times for that.” Juliette looked toward Audrey and blew her a kiss.

Audrey just smiled and reached her hand up to catch it which, out the corner of her eye, she saw was being filmed by a cameraman in the aisle beside her.

The show went to commercial after that, with Juliette walking off backstage. Audrey took the break to call her mom and gush about the win, but then had to cut her mom off and hang up when the show came back from commercial. Her heart started to pound again as she placed her phone in her clutch and passed it to Noel to hold.

She knew what award was next. She’d seen the list with the order they would go in.

Tightlipped, she watched as Ryan Seacrest announced the next presenters who came out and read a little ditty off the Teleprompter about writing for comedy. Noel took Audrey’s clammy hand in his and leaned in toward her ear.

“Whatever happens, you’re a winner.” He kissed her cheek and then faced forward again as the nominees’ names were read off and Audrey’s face was plastered on a screen on the main stage.

“There are veteran writers up there; I have nothing to be nervous about. I won’t—”

“And the Emmy goes to…”

Audrey’s heart stopped during the moment of silence when the envelope was being opened.

“Audrey Woods, What Girls Do.”

“Oh, fuck,” Audrey blurted, then covered her mouth. No doubt the camera picked that up. Juliette wasn’t back to her seat yet from backstage but the other cast and crew members of the show were there to congratulate her as she stood up.

Noel pulled Audrey in for a hug and kissed her full on the lips before muttering, “I knew you’d win.”

She was in such a daze and her hands were shaking so badly. She held onto Noel’s hand for a moment before letting go and walking up toward the stage, trying to ignore the fact that all eyes and all cameras were on her.

Don’t pull a Jennifer Lawrence, don’t trip up the stairs.

She made her way up successfully by holding up the bottom of her dress. She approached the microphone and the presenters, feeling the warm stage lights beating down on her. Taking the Emmy statuette in her hands, she wasn’t expecting it to be so heavy and laughed nervously. She thanked the presenters silently and then turned to look out at the audience, with a fresh wave of nerves crashing up on her like a tsunami.

“Uh, wow, I guess is appropriate,” she spoke first, mentally knowing she had a short amount of time to say whatever it is she was going to say. “To think a book I wrote with ‘fart’ in the title got me to where I am now,” she laughed, as did a good portion of the audience. “I need to thank Eric, first, because without his drive to see this show come to life, I wouldn’t be up here, and secondly to the girls of the show who have brought my books and their characters to life. You make me proud to know you. But the one person I really have to thank is my amazing fiancé, Noel.” She found him in the crowd despite the lights in her eyes and focused on him, which took her nerves away. “You make me laugh each and every single day and I can’t wait to share the rest of my life with you. I love you.” She then nodded her head, blew him a kiss and then held up her award.

As the music started up and audience clapped for her, she was whisked backstage for whatever awaited her next.