A Mighty Need

Audrey returned home with Noel a few days later. Their flight back to London had been a long one that took them through the night into the following day. Jet lag kicked their asses pretty badly and, by the time they were comfortably tucked in to their own bed, they were out cold for most of the day; not waking up until just after nine at night. They made no attempt at getting dressed or doing anything other than lounging around in bed. The only time either of them got up for anything, it was to use the bathroom and acquire food and drink from the kitchen. Austin greeted them both when they were sitting in the kitchen, just after they first awoke, and were stuffing their faces with ice lollies and waiting on the frozen pizza to bake in the oven. They played catch up with how things went in LA and how Audrey had chosen to have her award statuettes shipped home by way of a special service other award winners chose to use.

They arrived by courier service that Saturday afternoon and Audrey removed them from their packaging, wondering where to display them. She had her Emmy awards in office, so she figured that was the best location; on the shelf with the others. They went to Mitcham the following day for Sunday brunch wherein Diane fawned over Audrey’s belly, rubbing it occasionally and talking to it, and then apologizing to Audrey if she was making her uncomfortable. Audrey assured her she was fine with it when it came to family and close friends but, when strangers or people her and Noel barely knew did it, that was crossing the line for her.

The next day, Audrey started her UK book signing tour, which was an easier feat, considering the UK was quite smaller than the States. She had been able to set up the dates in such a way that she was able to be home on weekends, which made it feel like she had some sort of 9 to 5 job like an Average Joe. Noel came with her to most of the signings. Austin was there with her for all of them, though, just like he had been in the States. The tour started in Canterbury. Each day that week was a different place, except for that Friday when Audrey spent a few hours in the earlier half of the day at the Waterstone’s in Exeter and then moved onto Plymouth to the Waterstone’s in the evening.

She was home by late that night and that next day was Mike’s 35th birthday, so she was with Noel when they went out to dinner to celebrate. Austin came with, bringing along a girl named Lindsay he had recently started seeing. While it was very nice to see Austin so happy with a girlfriend, Audrey commented quietly to Noel how sad she was to see that Mike had come to his own birthday dinner alone. Apparently, during Noel and Audrey’s weeklong stay in Los Angeles, Mike and Lauren had split up for reasons he would not divulge, but only that the split was amicable. They offered their condolences in regard to the relationship to the younger Fielding and then changed the subject and focus on the merriment of the birthday celebration.

Noel spent a good portion of the evening talking between his father and Mike while Audrey found herself occupied primarily with Diane who asked her how the pregnancy was fairing, as well as the book signings, and then asking when she and Noel were going to find out the sex of the baby. Audrey responded that it wouldn’t be until her next OB appointment just after Valentine’s Day.

Austin didn’t come home with them that night. He went home with Lindsay to her flat in Dalston, so Noel and Audrey had the house to themselves and they made the most of it.

Audrey stripped down to nothing, walking around the downstairs with her 19 week pregnant belly sticking out. She was basically at the halfway point and really loved every minute of this pregnancy, although there were some things she could’ve done without, such as suddenly breaking out with acne on her forehead and chin or how extra limp her hair had become. This baby of theirs seemed to be draining her beauty from her, which she expressed to Noel, only for him to assure her, no such thing could ever happen.

With her lower back up against the dining table, Noel hoisted her up to sit on it before undoing his pants. Audrey leaned back slowly until she was lying across the smooth surface and then let out a sigh as Noel joined their bodies together. He held onto her hips while he thrust into her and she wrapped her legs around his waist to pull him in as far as he could go.

Their tête-à-tête continued into the living room, where Audrey knelt on the couch, facing the back while Noel situated himself behind her. It was just one of those positions that were working best for them at the moment as missionary was getting a bit awkward with her expanding stomach. That and the angle just felt really good for both of them.

When they were sated for the night and made their way up to bed, they cuddled; using their body heat to keep warm instead of cocooning themselves in the duvet. They talked well into the early hours of the morning before, at some point, falling asleep.



Monday morning, Audrey hit the road with Noel and Austin by way of train; departing from the Camden Road station for a three hour journey to Cardiff. They arrived twenty minutes after twelve to the Central Station where they caught a cab that took them to the Waterstone’s three minutes away. Her signing went from one until five only and then they returned to the train station for an hour trip back into England, to Bristol. They checked into the Novotel Bristol Centre hotel, got to their rooms to leave their belongings before finally grabbing some dinner in the restaurant downstairs. The next morning, they went to the Waterstone’s on Union Street and were there from ten until two. They went straight from that signing to the train station again to head onward toward Swindon where she had her evening signing at the Waterstone’s in the Brunel Centre from four to seven. It was during that time, that Noel checked them in to their next hotel. Audrey and Austin met him there later in the evening before heading across the street to grab a late dinner.

The rest of the week took them to Reading, Croydon and Chelmsford, but for the latter two days they were able to be home in Highgate. Noel didn’t go with Audrey those two dates. He stayed home to continue editing for the third series of his Luxury Comedy, focusing mostly on the sound aspect. For Croydon, Audrey and Austin were able to take the tube, and since it was close to Mitcham, Ray picked them up afterward and brought them back to his and Diane’s house for dinner before they caught the tube back to Highgate. It was the first time ever that Audrey (and Austin, too) had ate with her future in-law’s, at their house, without Noel and it felt a bit strange, as if she was missing a shoe. She felt a bit incomplete and awkward. Sure, she’d gone out for a meal with Diane before, one-on-one, but that was in public, and not in the privacy of her either’s home.

During their down time on the weekends, Audrey and Noel were Skyping with their wedding planner, Sharlice, who was back in Philadelphia. Audrey had met up with her briefly while she was last in her hometown for her US book tour and gone over venues which, of course, Audrey couldn’t decide on without Noel there. Instead, they had Sharlice take pictures of the possible locations and send them to the couple to view. They checked out the website links for each place, as well, but the only location that had the perfect feel was the one place that looked nothing like a wedding or reception venue from the outside, giving it that surprising allure.

Audrey and Noel had decided on Front & Palmer, a former barrel factory in the South Kensington Art District, remade into a modern event site. There was a main loft space with 35 foot ceilings, adjacent lounge area, art chandeliers, wood floors and art furniture which would somehow work into Noel and Audrey’s “dark circus” theme. Audrey’s only stipulation was “no clowns” as she did have that phobia of them. Noel, of course, would only ever be her one exception to the rule. For the bridesmaid’s dresses, it was difficult, because most of the bridal party was stateside while two were in the UK, so Audrey had to find a store that sold the same dresses all over and would be easy on her girls to get to and try on the dresses. As it turns out, although it wasn’t exactly as fancy as Audrey could pull off now, David’s Bridal was the easiest to go through, and they had the White collection by Vera Wang; both stateside and at the flagship store at the Westfield Centre in Stratford City. For the guys, it would be less of a hassle. With the exception of Audrey’s brother Eddie and brother-in-law Jeremy, the rest were all in the UK and could head to whatever tux location to try on their suits at the leisure. For Austin, Eddie and Jeremy, the three men would all be coming into London in late April when Diane planned on hosting Audrey’s baby shower. Eddie and Jeremy would take that opportunity, during the party, to head to the tuxedo store to try on their suits. It would be delivered by courier a few weeks before the wedding in Philadelphia in case they needed to take care of any alterations on their own time.

It was so much to do and plan and think about on top of the baby and her book signing tour that Audrey, more than once, found herself crying at night at the stress of it all. Fortunately, she had Noel there with her to shoulder the burden and calm her nerves.



A little over a week later, the book signing tour continued in Oxford and temporarily concluded that Friday in Wolverhampton. The entire weekend was spent milling about the house and trying to occupy themselves with menial tasks to keep their minds off the fact that Monday’s OB appointment was the day they would learn whether or not Audrey was carrying a boy or a girl. Sunday morning, the anxiousness seemed to spread to Austin, who decided to pack up his bedroom and move everything down into the bedroom in the basement and stress the idea that he thought it best if his room be repainted and become the baby’s nursery since it would be closest to Noel and Audrey’s room. So, Noel helped Austin carrying his things downstairs, including the furniture, while Audrey sat in the living room with Diane and Ray who had come up to Highgate for brunch instead of them coming down to Mitcham. Ray had offered to help move some of the furniture and Austin’s belongings but Noel insisted his father stay put lest he pull something.

“You’re going to be a granddad. Granddads are brittle. You’ll break something.”

“I’m only sixty-one, not eighty-one,” Ray scoffed. “Your fuckin’ idol, Mick Jagger, is older than I am and more active. I think I can manage carrying a lamp.”

Diane wanted to know what their plans were for decorating the nursery. Audrey admitted she was wanted the cliché of almost everything pink if it’s a girl, but it didn’t really matter what color scheme it was for a boy. Either way, Noel was still planning to paint some sort of design all over the walls, after the walls were painted pink or whatever other color they decided on for a boy.

Ray went with Noel and Austin to buy primer for what was now to be the baby’s room, and insisted on paying for all the primer. He decreed it was his first official gift as granddad. While Audrey and Diane went about making dinner for all of them, the guys had returned and started to prep the bedroom, which went quicker with three of them doing it. Afterward, Audrey went into inspect the now mostly white walls, which barely covered the royal blue they had been. They would need another coating or two of primer to mask all the blue before any other paint was put on the walls. Noel tried to get her to leave the room, feeling that the fumes could be bad for her, even though they had the window open a hair; enough that air could pass through and circulate but not enough that the cats could somehow slip out when they left the room unattended. Audrey shrugged the concern off, assuring him that smelling faint primer fumes wouldn’t harm her or the baby.

Dinner was served by six-thirty and consisted of meatloaf made from Audrey’s mother’s recipe and was paired with cheesy au gratin potatoes, Brussels sprouts and a box mix of Mexican rice. They all sat down for dinner around the dining room table, rather sandwiched because it was a narrow room. Noel had never had too many sit-down dinners while living in this house primarily for that reason. The table barely big enough to fit those currently seated. Any others present and they had to be separated from the rest and seated in the kitchen, around an even smaller table.

Looking around the dinner table, at the moment, as everyone had fallen silent while they fed their faces, Noel realized he wanted to move. Not necessarily right away or during this current year, but soon; maybe in the next year. His and Audrey’s family would be growing and they would need more room. For a few adults who occasionally had guests over, the home was doable. Four levels total and narrow, closed off rooms would make it difficult for raising children.

Noel caught Audrey’s eye as she stabbed her fork into one of her Brussels sprouts and smiled at her.

I’ll find us a more functional home, he thought to himself.



Monday morning, sometime after ten, Audrey and Noel headed out of their home and into the waiting cab. Across the road was that damned paparazzo again. Not just any one either. The same exact guy from a month and a half ago, so Audrey greeted him the same way before ducking into the cab; with her two finger salute. They drove off toward their appointment at the OB’s office in Marylebone, staring out their respective windows; lost in their thoughts as they wondered what the news would be.

They arrived within fifteen minutes and were both suddenly a bundle of nerves.

Audrey was officially two weeks beyond the halfway point of her pregnancy and it there was definitely no hiding the fact either. Her jackets couldn’t contain her anymore so, more often than not, she wore Noel’s. For whatever reason, she couldn’t bring herself to buy any maternity outerwear. Buying new pants sizes every few weeks was annoying enough.

They walked into the office, signed in and then sat together in the waiting room where there were two other women, both there by themselves. One was very engrossed with her cell phone while the other leafed aimlessly through an old issue of OK!. The latter looked up over the magazine and saw Audrey and Noel sitting there, and smiled at them. Whether or not she realized who either was, she didn’t let on. However, she did seem to convey that she thought it was nice to see both expecting parents together at an appointment.

Mondays were apparently busy for the doctor. Audrey and Noel had to wait for the two women before them to get their appointments over and done with before it was there turn. Another three women had come in before then and the small waiting room was getting a bit crowded. Eventually, though, it was their turn. The nurse practitioner had called Audrey’s name and she stood up with Noel joining her as they went into the exam room they were shown to. They were left alone for a few minutes, wherein Noel helped Audrey hop up onto the exam bed. He started to nervously fiddle about with some of the doctor’s instruments, like a pair of forceps he pretended was crab claws and clapped them together at Audrey. She giggled but then swatted his hand away and told him to put them back.

Their sonographer came in shortly after that; reaching for a pair of gloves and looking up at Audrey with a smile. “Hello and how are mother and child today?”

“Very good,” she replied, patting her stomach.

“That’s good to hear.” The sonographer moved around the exam bed and pulled a stool over while still talking. “So, everything’s feeling normal?”

Audrey nodded. “I feel fine and the baby is going to be an acrobat in the circus, I think, by the way he or she tumbles around inside.”

The sonographer smiled, as did Noel while he stood off quietly to the side.

“He or she,” the sonographer repeated. “Today you’re here to determine the sex of the child. Is that correct?”

Noel and Audrey both nodded. “Yeah,” she answered.

“Don’t want to be surprised, eh?”

“Getting pregnant with an IUD was surprise enough.”

The sonographer chuckled a bit and turned on the ultrasound machine and grabbed the jelly and wand Audrey was all too familiar with by now. “You can lie back and lift your shirt up off your stomach.”

Audrey did as told as the sonographer draped a white towel over Audrey’s lap. She always assumed it was so none of the jelly got on her pants, but she never bothered asking. Audrey looked up at Noel who had moved closer and was subconsciously fiddling with her hair now as his left hand rested on her shoulder. His right hand gripped the edge of the exam bed; his nerves dancing all over the place inside of him. Sensing she was staring at him, he looked down and met her gaze.

“You look more anxious than me,” she quipped.

Noel gave a shrug and a shy smile. “It’s exciting. We’re about to find out if we’re having a son or a daughter.”

“If it’s a Carlin or a whatshername,” Audrey added.

“Don’t have any female names picked out?” the sonographer asked, making small talk while began to smush the jelly around Audrey’s stomach with the ultrasound wand.

“No, not really. The boy’s name is a definite,” Audrey replied. “It’s a name I’ve always loved and wanted since I was about eighteen. Noel can pick the girl’s name. It’s only fair.”

Noel smiled, coiling a lock of her hair around his index finger. “I was thinking Tequila Sunshine.”

“Or not.”

“Oh, I’m only joking. I wouldn’t want to have a daughter growing up being made fun of because her friends thought mummy and daddy were alcoholics.”

The sonographer pointed at the screen. “Well, baby’s sucking their thumb right now.” She pressed some buttons on the machine and scoured elsewhere around Audrey’s stomach. “I just need to get an image at the right angle and we should be able to see his or her prince or princess parts.”

Audrey felt her eyes stinging with tears already. If the hormones weren’t enough to set her off already, seeing her child, who was tumbling about inside her, sucking their thumb was. There was a flutter of movement on the screen which Audrey also felt inside her. It was right after the ultrasound wand was pressed into one area, which made Audrey assume the baby sensed it and wanted to get the fuck away.

“Okay,” the sonographer said, pointing to the screen. “We got a decent view now. See that?”

Noel shook his head. “What? What are we looking at?”

“Nothing,” the sonographer smiled. “You’re having a girl.”

“We’re having a girl?” Noel repeated, a smile spreading like wildfire on his face.

“Really?” Audrey questioned to be sure.

The sonographer nodded. “Yeah. When the doctor comes in to talk to you, he’ll give the sonogram a second look to be sure, if you’d like.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“Oh my god,” Noel muttered. He couldn’t stop smiling. “We’re having a daughter; a yet-to-be-named daughter.”

Audrey wiped the tears from her eyes. “Well, we have another eighteen weeks to figure that out.”

The doctor did, in fact, take a second look and confirmed what the sonographer told them. They were indeed having a girl. They were given scans from different angles; one even had an arrow pointed at their daughter with the words “princess parts” typed on it. Audrey and Noel were given a moment to gather their wits about them and bask in the news. With their scans in hand, they soon left the exam room and went back out toward reception where they scheduled their next appointment for a month from then.

They were in such good moods leaving the doctor’s office that, as they made their way home to Highgate by way of another cab, Noel called up Dave to see if he was free for that evening to come over and to bring his camera equipment for a brief photo session. Dave had said he was available but would have his daughter Violet with him, but was curious as to what the photo session was for. Audrey wasn’t even sure. It was just something Noel had thought of off the top of his head.

Once they were home, they broke the news to Austin and then ordered in some pizza for lunch while they waited around for whenever Dave would be showing up. It wouldn’t be for another two hours and in came running his daughter with her blonde hair done up in haphazard bunches. Noel ruffled the top of her head as he greeted his longtime friend who asked where the camera stuff would be set up. Violet had been helping her daddy as well; carrying a case of something that Audrey couldn’t pinpoint.

“We can set up right here in the living room,” Noel said. “I was just looking for some professional candid photos, sort of, and I wasn’t about to ask or hire anyone else to do it.”

“Aww, shucks,” Dave snickered. “So, are you going to tell me why you need photos taken?”

“Baby gender reveal photos,” Noel replied. He lifted up Audrey’s shirt over her stomach. “We’re having what you have.”

Audrey pulled her shirt back down as Dave looked between the pair. “You’re having a girl? Congratulations. Now we can inter-marry our children to Julian’s sons and be one, big happy family,” he added teasingly. “A Boosh family if ever there was one.”

“So, how are we going to reveal the gender in the photos? My bare stomach with a pink ribbon around it? I’ve seen that done, but it’s a bit cliché,” Audrey remarked.

Dave stood there, just staring at them but not really looking at them. He was thinking of ideas. Violet had plopped down on the sofa and was immediately bored so Austin turned on the TV and found some cartoons she could watch to occupy her for the mean time.

“We should do something that befits the two of you. Artist, writer…British, American…”

“How about we move this up to my home studio instead? Audrey can stand there with her shirt rolled up showing off her belly and holding a book up to her face. I can stand behind her with pink paint on my hands and my hands on her stomach.”

“What if she’s holding a paintbrush instead with paint on the brush and on the brush it’s written, It’s A Girl?” Dave suggested.

Audrey nodded. “That works; or I can have his hand prints on my stomach and he can have pink paint all over him just for fun.” She smirked and booped Noel’s nose.

“We could have a paint fight.” Noel eyed her up. “Are you up for the challenge?”

“A paint fight?”

“Yeah, we just throw paint at each other. We can use the stuff that washes off easily.”

“We’d better change into clothes we don’t care about then.”

They were going to have Austin stay downstairs with Violet, but when she heard there was going to be a paint fight, she wanted to come with and see. Audrey and Noel changed into plain white T-shirts and old pairs of jeans before they headed up to the third floor art studio. Austin helped lug Dave’s equipment up and Violet “helped” again so that she felt like she was contributing. Noel broke out two different shades of washable acrylic paints; one light, one dark. He grabbed two brushes and poured the paint into separate paint roller trays. Handing one brush over to Audrey, he then lifted her shirt up over her stomach and dipped the palms of his hands into the darker pink paint and brought them to her stomach to leave his hand prints.

“There, that’s a start,” he said.

Dave stood back at a safe distance so no paint got on any of his equipment. “Well? One, two, three, four, I declare a paint war. Get to it.”

Violet was damn near bouncing in place over her excitement in watching the paint fight take place. Noel dipped his brush in the dark pink paint again while Audrey did the same with the light pink. They counted to three and then just flung the paint at each other; immediately spluttering when they both seemed to get it in their mouths. Laughing it off, they went to town. Audrey reached out and swiped paint down Noel’s nose and he swiped his brush across her left arm. All the while, Dave just kept snapping pictures. It continued like that, with them splashing paint or brushing it on each other for a good five minutes or so, until they were practically covered from head to toe. The only exception was that they had avoided getting any other paint on her stomach so that his hand prints stood out.

When they were done splattering each other with paint, they set their brushes down and took a few steps back and laughed at what a mess they were and the mess they’d made.

“This place looks almost as bad as when we took that acid two New Years’ ago,” Noel laughed, then cut himself off when he realized Violet was there. He probably shouldn’t be talking about taking drugs with a young child present. Fortunately, the little girl didn’t seem to notice. “C’mere,” he muttered as he closed the distance between them to kiss Audrey.

She was giggling the entire time they kissed, partly because she had some paint up her right nostril and it tickled when she breathed in and out with her nose. She tried blowing her nose and then just had to stick her finger in there and wipe some of it out.

“My god, I’m afraid to find out where else the paint wound up,” she joked.

“I’ll check for you later,” Noel winked.

“Why don’t you two pick your brushes back up, but just hold them and looked toward me and smile,” Dave spoke.

Both Noel and Audrey did as suggested and stood side by side with each other. They each wrap an arm around the other’s waist and held their brushes up with the hands furthest away from the other person.

“Good,” Dave said, after taking a succession of pictures. “Keep that pose and kiss.” They did that as well, holding it for a moment before parting and looking back at Dave. “I think we have enough pictures, unless you can think of anything else.”

“Would you be able to edit the photographs, to make them black and white but have the pink colors from the paint still present?” Audrey wondered.

Dave nodded. “Sure.”

“Awesome.”

“Yeah, the pink needs to stand out,” Noel agreed.

“If you want, I’ll bring up the pictures on my laptop in your office. The two of you can go shower off and when you’re done we can go through the shots I took and you can choose which photos you want to keep.”

“Thanks, mate.”

“I’d kiss you but I don’t want to get paint all over you,” Audrey said to Dave.

He smirked and shrugged. “You can kiss me later.”

After taking a long shower together, strictly to clean up and nothing else, Audrey and Noel redressed in the clothes they’d been wearing earlier before heading back upstairs and into the office. Dave was there, but Austin and Violet weren’t. Apparently, she had wanted to watch cartoons again and Austin was giving her some leftover pizza from their lunch to eat. Audrey and Noel had settled on the last picture Dave had taken as the one they would send out to friends and family for their big gender reveal announcement. They wanted to use one of the paint fight pictures as something they would have framed. Dave said he would have all of them printed out for them and he’d give them the SD card to use if they wanted copies. But the pictures they wanted framed, Dave was going to edit at home and get back to them as soon as possible.

Noel offered to pay Dave, but Dave declined.

“When have I ever taken payment from you for photos like this? Never. I’m not gonna start now.”

“I’m clean, I can kiss you now,” Audrey remarked, leaning past Noel and grabbing Dave on either side of his face and placing a platonic kiss on his lips. “Thank you so much for this.”

“It’s what friends are for.”

Dave stayed a while longer with Violet, after they sat around discussing options for the photos. They had some tea and chatted upon some of the wedding plans they’d finalized recently as well as Noel mentioning how he was presenting at the BRIT Awards in two days. Audrey was excited because it was the first time attending an awards show with Noel where she was his guest and not the other way around. She was looking forward to just showing up and sitting there and not having to do anything while she could just watch the show and Noel for his one award he was presenting for.

Eventually, Dave packed his stuff back up into his car and left with Violet. He wanted them to be home for dinner with his girlfriend, Violet’s mother. Austin headed out to meet up with his girlfriend Lindsay, as the day before had been Valentine’s Day and they hadn’t gotten together to do anything because she had been working.

Noel and Audrey realized they had completely forgotten it had been Valentine’s. They had been so caught up with the doctor’s appointment that nothing else had registered in their minds. In fact, two days earlier, on that Saturday, had been the one year anniversary of their engagement.

“How could we forget it was Valentine’s?” Audrey admonished. She was sitting on their bed, leaning back on her arms while Noel fiddled with his iPod in its docking station.

“It’s our old age,” he joked.

When he turned around, The Rolling Stones’ cover of “My Girl” started playing. Audrey beamed at him. He began to sway from side to side, singing along and pretending he was holding an invisible microphone in his hand.

“Is this song about me or our daughter?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Our daughter, Noel repeated in his head. How strange and wonderful at the same time.

“Both,” he replied. Kneeling down in front of her, Noel placed his hands on her legs and leaned forward to kiss her stomach. “Happy Belated Valentine’s Day to both my girls.”

Audrey brought her hands up to either side of his face and ran her fingers back through his hair. “Right back at ya, moon of my life.”

Noel snickered. “Have you been binge-watching Game of Thrones lately?”

“The fact that you know that was a Game of Thrones reference amazes me. You’ve never watched it with me when it’s been on.”

“I saw a few of the earlier episodes with Lliana once.” Noel made a face. “Speaking of references, I probably shouldn’t reference my past relationship on Belated Valentine’s with my fiancée.”

Audrey shrugged. “I don’t care. I’m not asking you to deny your past any more than you would do the same with me.”

“I wouldn’t.”

“Exactly. I know you wouldn’t.” She leaned forward as best as she could to kiss Noel but her stomach was starting to get in the way so he met her halfway. “I love you, moon of my life.”

“I love you, too, my sun and stars.” He smiled, but after a moment he looked confused. “Wait, wasn’t ‘moon of my life’ the girl?”

Audrey just laughed.



The following day, Audrey was a half hour’s drive away at the St Albans Waterstone’s with Dave only. Austin had woken up that morning, sick as a dog, with some sudden stomach bug and was throwing up quite a bit. Audrey wasn’t about to make him join her, plus she wanted to keep him at bay in case whatever he had was contagious. She just couldn’t afford to get sick. Noel was working on more editing for Lux Com, but before either had left the house, Noel had called up Dave with a question about the pictures. In passing, Noel mentioned Audrey heading up to St Albans and how he was considering bailing on editing so she didn’t have to go alone, but Dave offered to go with instead, quite out of the blue. Dave showed up by eleven-thirty with his own car and his camera in tow.

After they arrived into St Albans and Dave found a parking spot, he brought his camera with him and snapped a few pictures of Audrey as she walked slightly ahead of him. The sound of the shutter made her turn around and look at him with a quizzical eye.

“Are you photographing me?”

“Documenting, really.”

“Documenting what exactly?” she smirked at him, pushing hair out of her face that the wind had whipped around, forcing her to practically eat it.

“Can you keep a secret?” He pulled the camera down as they began walking up Civic Close.

“Like my life depended on it.”

“I haven’t been filming and following Noel around for a behind the scenes documentary of his life during the editing process of Luxury Comedy. I’ve been following him around here and there, as well as the two of you together, as a wedding gift. It’s typical of couples these days to have videos played at the reception with photos of the bride and groom from birth till the couple met each other, with music set to it, but I wanted to do something a bit more special. Like, an actual video all your guests can watch. There’ll be footage of the two of you, with interviews and such from friends and family. I didn’t want to tell Noel because I can easily get pictures of him when he was young from his parents and have easy access to everyone else he knows to get interviews or photos, but I don’t have that access with you. I don’t know your parents or your family and friends back in the States to get what I’d need for the video.”

Audrey smiled. “You want me to find some baby pictures and whatnot of myself to give you?”

“Yeah, if you wouldn’t mind.” He looked a bit shy about asking. “Also, if you could give me the phone numbers of your immediate family and maybe your friends that are your bridesmaids, I can call them up; let them know what I’m doing. Maybe I can Skype with them and record them that way or something.”

“Yeah, sure,” Audrey nodded. “You still don’t want Noel knowing, though, right?”

“Yeah, it’s mostly a surprise for him. I mean, yeah, it’s a gift for both of you from me. It’s something I want to do, but I want Noel to be surprised about it. Maybe, if he asks you if you wanna do some sort of video for the reception, just tell him no or something.”

“We actually haven’t talked about anything like that.” They cut through to Saint Peter’s Street and turned left. “There’s been so much to do, and it’s even harder since the wedding is abroad. Fortunately we have a really awesome event planner who has been working really well with us on everything. We’ll be seeing her next month when we go to the States for Easter. We’ll be in Columbus with my family for a couple days and then the rest of the week in Philly to take care of some wedding stuff. It’s the last time I will bother flying anywhere until after the baby is born and the last time I’ll get home to the States until the wedding, so…” Audrey chuckled. “Sorry, I just rambled my ass off there for a second.”

Dave grinned and shrugged. “I’m used to it.”

“Does your girlfriend ramble, too?”

“No, Noel does.” Audrey narrowed her eyes and smirked. “You’ve probably noticed how he gets very chatty when he’s excited about something. He goes on and on; sometimes throwing in nonsensical stories he makes up on the spot to diffuse any awkwardness he might be sensing.”

“Oh, I know all about using humor to diffuse awkwardness. I got two books out of it.”

The pair of them approached the bookstore and Dave held the door open for her. “Après vous.”



The day after the signing was the 2016 Brit Awards at the O2 Arena. Noel was there to present the award for British Breakthrough Act and was dressed in a Bas Kosters dress from the Dutch designer’s latest collection as well as a fluffy jacket, also from Bas Kosters, that was black and white, and seemed to be a mix of feathers and glitter. If that didn’t scream Noel’s name, then who knows what did. Audrey channeled her inner Stevie Nicks again when she had decided on the Ellie Saab black belted silk Georgette Caplet gown. The belt across the front of the dress sat high enough that it didn’t constrict her stomach any, which was good. On Noel’s feet, his silver boots; on Audrey’s feet, black Stella McCartney heels. Since she would be seated most of the time, she wasn’t worried about her feet aching.

They walked the red carpet together, with Audrey hanging back this time as the interviewers wanted to speak to Noel; primarily about the award he was presenting, who he was looking forward to see perform and win, but they did touch upon Audrey’s baby bump and asked about that as well.

“So, when can we expect the littlest Fielding?”

“You’re not talking about my brother, are you?” Noel joked. Then he answered more seriously, “In June.”

“You must be terribly excited.”

“Yeah, we are. There’s a lot to do and plan for, but we couldn’t be happier.”

“It won’t slow down after the baby’s born either,” the interviewer commented with a smile.

“No, but that’s okay. We’ll manage. Audrey’s a trouper. She’ll kick me into shape if I start slacking off.”

Audrey smirked as he gave her hand a squeeze.

“Have you got names picked out? Do you know what you’re having?”

“We had some names picked out,” he replied. It wasn’t a lie. But the one definite name they had was null and void since they weren’t having a son and instead a daughter. “But what we’re having is a secret for the time being. We know but we’re waiting to tell our families and friends first before anyone else might find out.”

That was pretty much the only thing asked in regard to their personal lives. Some just commented on how nice Audrey looked and if both were excited about the baby, which of course they were. She posed for photos with Noel as they made their way along and into the arena, where they were shown to their seats at a table, just like at the Golden Globes a month earlier.

At one point during the night, Coldplay performed and Noel mimicked eating a gun, so Audrey gave him a playful, admonishing shove. What made the night quite hilarious, at least in her book, was after the show, at the after party, when Audrey was temporarily separated from Noel. She was talking to Lily Allen who wanted to Instagram a selfie with Audrey, when Chris Martin walked near. It was the first time, ever, that Audrey had ever been seen the man up close before and had to steal her chance to say hello while she could; while Noel was elsewhere otherwise both men would’ve probably took off running in opposite directions from each other.

Audrey excused herself from Lily for a moment and tapped Chris on the arm. “Hi,” she muttered, as he turned to look at her.

“Hello,” he smiled, not seeming to know who she was, which was understandable. But, then, something seemed to have clicked and his entire person seemed to lean back from her as if on instinct. “You’re Noel Fielding’s fiancée, the American writer, aren’t you? Audrey Woods, right?”

Audrey nodded and smiled. “Yes, and before you freak out or anything, I want you to know I don’t share the same views as Noel in regard to you and your band. In fact, I own all of your CDs and have even seen you in concert before.”

“You’re not taking the piss out of me, are you? Noel didn’t put you up to this?”

“I swear on my unborn baby that I’m serious.”

Chris looked down at her baby bump and then smiled back up at her, offering his hand. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, in that case, and congratulations on the baby.”

“Thank you and I really enjoyed your performance tonight. I love the new song.”

Chris smiled, but it faded quickly. His pleasant demeanor with Audrey went away when he saw something behind her. “Thank you, too. If you’ll excuse me…”

With that, he turned and moved away through the people as Audrey turned around to find Noel approaching. She shook her head at him with a smirk.

“You scared him away,” she pouted.

“You were fraternizing with the enemy,” Noel chided; drink in hand as he placed the other one on the small of her back.

“He’s not my enemy.”

“You don’t see me calling Justin Bieber up for a game of squash, do you?”

“You don’t like Justin Bieber, either. That’s a terrible example and you know it.”

Noel teasingly narrowed his eyes at her before leaning down to kiss her gently. “What were you and the Prince of Pillocks talking about?”

“How he didn’t have to be scared of me because I’m not calling for his head on a silver platter like you are.” Audrey grinned. “No, I was just telling him the truth, that my views toward him are different than yours; that I like his music.” Noel winced. “Much to your displeasure.”

“I will convert you someday.”

“I could say the same.”

“Nope.” Noel shook his head adamantly. “Never. Never, ever. I will divorce you so fast and sue for sole custody of our daughter,” he joked; deadpan, but with a twinkle in his eye.

“I’d like to see you try.” Audrey flashed her teeth at him as she smiled brightly up at him. She turned her body to face him fully; snaking her arms inside his fluffy Bas Kosters jacket and around his waist to give his ass a squeeze through the rather thin material of his Bas Kosters dress.

“Wanna head home now and continue this after party there?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

“As if you need to ask twice.”

They turned to stand side by side as Noel wrapped his arm around her shoulders and placed a kiss on top of her head. “That’s my girl.”

“Plural now.”

Noel nodded and smiled. “Yeah it is.”