Status: One-Shot
We Will Bring the Tidal Wave
Chapter 1/1
In Jack's mind, it took him too long to notice. They'd been best friends since 5th grade, he should've noticed when Alex had stopped being his normal, perky self. And then he realized that Alex never was happy, that's why he hadn't noticed the changes. In Freshman year he had seen a cut on Alex's arm, when his sleeve had been pushed up to his elbows, but there was only one, so he thought nothing of it. He was too oblivious to notice that Alex always wore long sleeves, or bundled his arms with bracelets. By the time he realized, he was afraid it was too late.
***
The two boys were sitting on the floor of Jack's room, in front of the TV. It was mid summer and the air conditioning had stopped working. They'd had to move the big fan in the garage all the way up to his room, but it was still boiling in the room and Jack had resulted to taking his shirt off and fanning himself with a paper plate. Alex was still in his sweatshirt and for the last half hour Jack had tried to convince him to take it off otherwise he'd overheat, but Alex was persistent and refused to remove it.
"Just take it off Lex, it's too hot to be wearing that," Jack pleaded. Alex's face was beat red, and sweat was rolling down his face and his hair was soaked by now.
"No, I'm cold." That's when Jack knew something was off. There was no way, with it nearly 90 degrees in the room that he was cold. He finally placed the pieces together, and he just knew. Jack had thought that Alex had stopped changing in front of him because of the rumors floating around school that he was gay. He'd come out to Alex far before the rumors had started, but that was the only reasonable explanation. As to the sweatshirts, he just hadn't noticed anything wrong with it, unless it was hot out, and even then Alex always managed an excuse.
"Take off your sweatshirt." This time his words were spoken with a more serious tone. Finally Alex carefully pulled the sweatshirt over his head slowly and curled in on himself as he tried to cover his arms and his tears. "Oh Lex." Alex was just waiting for him to leave, even though it was Jack's house, why would he want to stay with a fucked up Alex. He was shocked to feel arms wrap around his waist. "I'm so sorry Lex."
"Why are you apologizing?" Alex sniffled.
"I should have noticed sooner." Alex was unresponsive as he let Jack continue to hold him tight. "Why'd you do it?"
"I'm depressed. I have been since Tom." Jack had noticed the small changes in 7th grade, right after Tom died, but he'd thought it was just part of the normal grieving process. It'd happened in the summer, and he'd become distant. They had still spent the whole summer together but Alex was quiet, and Jack didn't notice much because he was the one that already did all of the talking. That was also around the time he'd stopped changing in front of him and constantly made sure every inch of his skin was constantly covered. "Please don't hate me." Jack couldn't believe that he'd actually hate him, they'd been best friends from the start and he wouldn't dare hurt him like that.
"I could never hate you, you're my best friend." Jack didn't notice how Alex's heart broke at these words, he was too busy trying to keep hi together when he was only pulling him apart.
"Thanks Jacky." Alex's voice cracked and he molded himself to Jack, because he wasn't ready to let go, ever.
***
Jack hadn't left Alex's side for the whole week, except for when either one of them had to go home. Alex was becoming happier, and he hadn't cut that whole week, mostly because Jack had thrown out all of his razors. He could've gotten new ones, but he didn't need them.
It was nearing the end of summer and that meant that in a couple days Jack would be heading to Lebanon to visit his family. Alex wasn't strong enough to survive the two weeks without him, he'd relapse, he was sure of it, but he couldn't force him to stay. He'd just have to make the best of the next two days.
***
It was the day before Jack was leaving and instead of cherishing the last 24 hours with his best friend, Alex was crying in his room and searching for something sharp. He knew Jack wouldn't approve but what he didn't know wouldn't hurt him, it'd only hurt Alex. He finally found a pencil sharpener in one of his desk drawers. He took out the blade in record time and shakily held it over his wrist. Jack couldn't leave, he needed him, he was already a mess and Jack hadn't even left yet.
He snapped his head to the door behind him when he heard a light knock. "Come in," he said shakily and saw that Jack was the one on the other side. His eyes automatically landed on the blade in his hands. "I didn't," Alex raised up his wrist to show the old scars, but no new ones.
"I don't even want you thinking about such a thing." Jack took the blade and disappeared before coming back without it. Alex was back to crying in a ball on his bed. "What's wrong Lexy?"
"You can't leave." Alex stood from his bed and met him halfway between the bed and the door and latched onto him. "I need you."
"I don't wanna leave you either, but it's only 2 weeks. It's not like I'll be gone forever." Alex tried to relax, but if Jack left him, he'd hurt himself. He looked up at Jack and made a split second decision and he slowly brought his face closer. Jack looked nervous, and Alex was slowly retreating and something seemed to register in Jack and he was chasing Alex's lips to finally connect them. Jack brought his hand up to cup Alex's face and pushing their lips harder together and Alex wrapped his arms around his middle.
"2 weeks Lex," he whispered.
Alex nodded. "2 weeks."
***
The two boys were sitting on the floor of Jack's room, in front of the TV. It was mid summer and the air conditioning had stopped working. They'd had to move the big fan in the garage all the way up to his room, but it was still boiling in the room and Jack had resulted to taking his shirt off and fanning himself with a paper plate. Alex was still in his sweatshirt and for the last half hour Jack had tried to convince him to take it off otherwise he'd overheat, but Alex was persistent and refused to remove it.
"Just take it off Lex, it's too hot to be wearing that," Jack pleaded. Alex's face was beat red, and sweat was rolling down his face and his hair was soaked by now.
"No, I'm cold." That's when Jack knew something was off. There was no way, with it nearly 90 degrees in the room that he was cold. He finally placed the pieces together, and he just knew. Jack had thought that Alex had stopped changing in front of him because of the rumors floating around school that he was gay. He'd come out to Alex far before the rumors had started, but that was the only reasonable explanation. As to the sweatshirts, he just hadn't noticed anything wrong with it, unless it was hot out, and even then Alex always managed an excuse.
"Take off your sweatshirt." This time his words were spoken with a more serious tone. Finally Alex carefully pulled the sweatshirt over his head slowly and curled in on himself as he tried to cover his arms and his tears. "Oh Lex." Alex was just waiting for him to leave, even though it was Jack's house, why would he want to stay with a fucked up Alex. He was shocked to feel arms wrap around his waist. "I'm so sorry Lex."
"Why are you apologizing?" Alex sniffled.
"I should have noticed sooner." Alex was unresponsive as he let Jack continue to hold him tight. "Why'd you do it?"
"I'm depressed. I have been since Tom." Jack had noticed the small changes in 7th grade, right after Tom died, but he'd thought it was just part of the normal grieving process. It'd happened in the summer, and he'd become distant. They had still spent the whole summer together but Alex was quiet, and Jack didn't notice much because he was the one that already did all of the talking. That was also around the time he'd stopped changing in front of him and constantly made sure every inch of his skin was constantly covered. "Please don't hate me." Jack couldn't believe that he'd actually hate him, they'd been best friends from the start and he wouldn't dare hurt him like that.
"I could never hate you, you're my best friend." Jack didn't notice how Alex's heart broke at these words, he was too busy trying to keep hi together when he was only pulling him apart.
"Thanks Jacky." Alex's voice cracked and he molded himself to Jack, because he wasn't ready to let go, ever.
***
Jack hadn't left Alex's side for the whole week, except for when either one of them had to go home. Alex was becoming happier, and he hadn't cut that whole week, mostly because Jack had thrown out all of his razors. He could've gotten new ones, but he didn't need them.
It was nearing the end of summer and that meant that in a couple days Jack would be heading to Lebanon to visit his family. Alex wasn't strong enough to survive the two weeks without him, he'd relapse, he was sure of it, but he couldn't force him to stay. He'd just have to make the best of the next two days.
***
It was the day before Jack was leaving and instead of cherishing the last 24 hours with his best friend, Alex was crying in his room and searching for something sharp. He knew Jack wouldn't approve but what he didn't know wouldn't hurt him, it'd only hurt Alex. He finally found a pencil sharpener in one of his desk drawers. He took out the blade in record time and shakily held it over his wrist. Jack couldn't leave, he needed him, he was already a mess and Jack hadn't even left yet.
He snapped his head to the door behind him when he heard a light knock. "Come in," he said shakily and saw that Jack was the one on the other side. His eyes automatically landed on the blade in his hands. "I didn't," Alex raised up his wrist to show the old scars, but no new ones.
"I don't even want you thinking about such a thing." Jack took the blade and disappeared before coming back without it. Alex was back to crying in a ball on his bed. "What's wrong Lexy?"
"You can't leave." Alex stood from his bed and met him halfway between the bed and the door and latched onto him. "I need you."
"I don't wanna leave you either, but it's only 2 weeks. It's not like I'll be gone forever." Alex tried to relax, but if Jack left him, he'd hurt himself. He looked up at Jack and made a split second decision and he slowly brought his face closer. Jack looked nervous, and Alex was slowly retreating and something seemed to register in Jack and he was chasing Alex's lips to finally connect them. Jack brought his hand up to cup Alex's face and pushing their lips harder together and Alex wrapped his arms around his middle.
"2 weeks Lex," he whispered.
Alex nodded. "2 weeks."