Synthetic Lover

Where…Where am I…?

What happened?

“Devin…”

R-Ricky…?

“Open your eyes, Devin.”

I slowly did so.

Everything around me was white.
Just plain white.

However, a familiar figure stood in the midst of it.

The figure turned to face me and gave me a smile.

“Ricky…”

I blinked once and he was now only an arm’s length from me.

“What’s going on, Ricky? What is this place?”
He only shook his head and placed his hands on my shoulders.

“Devin, I need you to listen to me.”
“Y-You can talk!”

He placed a finger on my lips to shut me up.

“What happened that night was not your fault. No one could have saved me. I’m gone and I’ll always be. What you did was reckless and harmful. I forbid you to do that again, Devin. From here on out, you have to move on. You have to recover.”

I tensed up.

“What are you talking about? I saved you! I brought you back!”

He bit down on his lip, tilting his head down slightly.

“What did you do, Ricky?!”
I balled up my fists in anger.

He came closer and pressed his lips against mine.
I lost my anger in an instant and melted into his touch.

“Promise me that you’ll move on. Promise me that you’ll get better. Get out of the house. Hang out with the guys again. Find someone else to love you just as much I did. You won’t have to look far though.”

I let a couple of tears fall.

“Why should I move on…?! You’re here with me! I don’t need to move on…!”
He wiped the tears away.

“Please, Devin. Do it for yourself. Do it for me. Do it for everyone who cares about you.
And if it makes you feel better…”

He placed his hand over my heart.

“I’ll always be with you. After all, we’re linked.”

I didn’t know what he meant, but somehow, I felt so safe with those words.
I trusted them.

I placed my hand on his, feeling its warmth start to disappear.

“Okay, I promise. For you, I’ll promise. But, you’re still with me, right? Right?”
He pressed his lips against mine, but his warmth only lingered for a second.

“I love you, Devin. I always will. Never forget that.”
“Ricky—”

“Now, it’s time for you to wake up.”
“Ricky?!”

“Devin?!”

My eyes shot open, frantically looking around.
I was back in my study, on the floor in Josh’s arms.

Josh was shaking me slightly, fear and worry written all over his face.

“Hey…! Say something!”
“Josh…? Where’s Ricky?”

He averted eye contact with me, his facial expression darkening.

I quickly sat up and looked around.
I froze at what I saw.

A circle of eight candles…
And Ricky’s body, doubled up on the floor, the black book in his hand.

“Ricky?!”

I pushed Josh off of me and crawled over to him.

“Ricky?”
I placed a hand on his shoulder.

He didn’t move.

“Come on, Ricky! Don’t do this!”

I turned him so that he was lying on his back and moved his hair away from his face.

He’s so pale.

I moved my hand to his cheek.

He’s so cold.

His eyes were closed. There wasn’t any shallow breathing.
He wasn’t breathing at all.

“No…This can’t be happening…! I said that I wouldn’t lose you again!!!”
I hit the floor with my fist.

“God-fucking dammit, Ricky!”

Tears poured from my eyes as I sobbed hysterically.
I felt two arms wrap around me and pull me into an embrace.

It was Josh.

“He wanted this, Devin. He did this so you wouldn’t suffer anymore. You have to let go. He’s gonna be okay.”

I let out another sob as I rested my head against his chest.
He wiped a tear away and kissed my forehead.

Warm arms. Comforting words.

I looked at the corpse on the floor, feeling pain and sadness overwhelm me again.

He’s gone…

He’s gone and I have to accept it.