Just for a Moment

I bashed the alarm to dismiss as soon as it started to ring. I have such a headache from all the crying I did yesterday. My friends canceled anyway, so I guess it was good timing if anything. I only texted Jack twice and called him once, to make sure I wasn't bugging him, but he hasn't responded to anything. He's really fed up with me. I don't know why though. Did he not see me push away from Rick? Was it not obvious that I didn't like him? I just don't get it.

I slump out of bed and shuffle over to the bathroom. When I close the door, I examine myself in the mirror and notice that my eyes were all puffy. Great. I groan and turn the shower on as I undress myself. I loosen my hair and wash it, getting the sudden urge to chop it off. When I get out and dry off, I walk back into my room and pull on a simple pair of black jeans and a green Toon Link graphic tee. After zipping up my charcoal gray combat boots, I shuffle over to my standing mirror and huff, feeling unsatisfied with the way I look. I leave my hair damp and loose as I wrap a scarf around my neck and button my coat up. Before making my way to the cafeteria, I grab my phone and keys, praying that today will turn out better than yesterday.

When I get to Menu’s, I make my way over to the group table before remembering that Lizzy and Kellin weren't there. I stop in my tracks and scan the room for Naomi, maybe I could sit with her. I finally spot her sitting at a table in the middle of the room - most likely with other culinary majors - and speed over to her.

“Hi,” I sigh heavily as I take the seat next to her

“Good morning, girlie.” She gives me a side hug then takes a good look at me. “Wow, you look like you were hit by a bus or something.”

I give her an easy glare. “Gee, thanks.”

“Sorry. Is something wrong? Is there anything you want to talk about?” She gives me a worried look.

“Yes, but let’s talk about that later. I just want an easy going morning,” I say, rolling my eyes as I pick up a menu.

“Okay,” she pouts.

I skim through the menu as Naomi continues her conversation with the other people at the table. As I push some hair out of my face, I get the sudden urge to look up. I do, instantly glancing at Jack who was just getting to the group table. He sits down; looks over to my usual spot, and then frowns. He looked so tired. Guilt fills me as I pick the menu back up, hiding my face. Naomi gives me a weird look while waving the waiter over. When he comes over, I only order a strawberry and banana smoothie due to my loss of appetite. This causes Naomi to stare at me with wide eyes. Something has got to be wrong with me.

After barely sipping my smoothie, I tell Naomi to pass by my room when she’s done talking to her friends. She gives me sympathetic smile then sends me off. I stand up and make my way through the cafeteria, with my eyes only facing the floor in front of me. When I exit Menu’s I pick up my pace toward the room, fishing the keys out of my pocket. I put my key into the door with a shaky hand, feeling nauseous. I leave the door slightly open as I throw myself onto the bed. I hope Naomi doesn't take too long; I really need her to distract me.

“Ally?”

My heart speeds up as I try to push myself up. I sit up and see Jack, letting himself in and closing the door behind him.

“Jack,” I mumble softly.

“What are you trying to do? Make yourself sick? Stop being dumb,” he says in an angry tone, approaching my bed.

“So you came here to yell at me?” I looked up at him, upset that he would come here to say that.

“Why would you go outside with wet hair and no hat? It’s like the end of December,” he continued, ignoring my question.

“What do you want, Jack?” I shout.

“What do I want?” He scoffs, a bit of disgust in his face.

He glares at me for a second before collapsing onto the bed next to me and pulling me in for a kiss. I give in feeling so confused but happy at the same time. Was this Jack’s way of saying that he was forgiving me? It deepened as the time passed, but stopped abruptly when Naomi walked in.

“Um...Am I interrupting something?” She asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes,” Jack says as he gets up to push her out of the room and close the door.

“That was rude,” I state as he walks back towards me.

“Forget that, we need to talk,” he says, stopping in front of me.

A pit fills my stomach as those words echo in my head.

“Are you,” I hesitate, “breaking up with me?”

He purses his lips then looks away. Oh no.

“I should…but I can’t,” he mumbles.

I bite my lip to stop myself from crying. He drops to his knees and folds his arms on my lap, laying his head on it. He looks at the wall, opens his mouth to say something then sighs.

“I don’t know what to do Ally. You’re just,” he sucks his teeth, “I don’t get you.” He looks up at me and shakes his head. “I thought that you cared about me.”

“I do Jack-”

“Then why did you cheat on me?” He asked in a sincere voice, barely loud enough to hear. He didn't look angry or resentful, just plain old hurt.

“I didn't Jack, Rick kissed me, and I pushed away from him.”

“That’s not what I'm talking about,” he says, getting up. He walks over to my window and combs his fingers through his hair. “Vic told me what happened.”

I mentally kick myself as the memory of that night starts to fill my head.

On the day before Winter Fest, I went to breakfast and noticed that Jack wasn't at the table. So I decided to visit his room after I was done eating. No, I didn't find him cheating on me or anything; he was just sick. I stood with him for a little bit, making sure that he was taken care of. I picked up some medicine and Gatorade for him at the Quick Shop that was on campus because he had gotten a stomach virus. He kept begging me to leave so that I wouldn't catch it, so I listened and headed to my room. When I got there, I found a letter half slipped under my door. I opened my door and picked it up, plopping onto my bed as I opened it. My eyes widened as I read the letter:

Hey Ally,

Are you thinking of me? I know that you are; I bet that scar Jack sports is a reminder of me daily. I sure hope it is, I hope you hear his bones crunch every time you close your eyes. Just thinking about it makes me want to squeeze that precious face of yours. Anyways, I really miss you; it’s not the same spending time without you. I hope that you’re having fun with your new boyfriend, for now at least. Just know that I love you, and that I’m always thinking about you.

Ps. I’m free and watching. ;)

XX

The first person that comes to mind is Max. There’s no way he’s already gotten bail! I started to pace my room and hyperventilate. What if he finds a way to squirm past the cameras and security? How did he even manage to get this letter to me? I sit on the floor and cross my legs, biting my nails all the while. What do I do? I can’t tell Lizzy; that would just make her panic. And Jack? No way. Not even going to show the slightest amount of fear around him. So I ran to Vic. He was in his room, playing his guitar and writing a new song in his notebook. Next thing you know, we’re both ranting about our previous relationships and Vic whips out a bottle of whiskey that he had stashed away, hidden in a disguised bottle in the back of his mini fridge. I concluded that I had nothing holding me back, so I started to drink along with him. That’s when one thing led to another, and we ended up making out. It wasn't anything serious; it was just the alcohol... That doesn't excuse my stupid choice though. I shouldn't have taken any of it, and I should have stopped Vic too. If I did, I wouldn't be in the situation I'm in right now.

“Jack, I’m so sorry,” I sigh, laying my face in my hands.

“Why didn't you just tell me, Ally?” He closes the curtain and turns to look at me.

“I didn't want you to worry about it,” I whine, uncovering my face and sinking to the floor.

“So you thought that getting drunk and making out with your best friend would be better? Not to mention that he’s your sister’s ex,” he retorts, pacing the room. “It’s not like I was going to go look for Max and beat him up or something. Yeah, I would've been pissed about the letter but I rather be mad about that than find out about you cheating on me.” I bite my lip and fidget with the zipper on my boot, feeling ashamed of myself. Jack slides down to sit beside me, grabbing my hand and lacing our fingers. He leans his head on mine while I look down at my free hand, just glad that he was talking to me again. “It was really hard trying to stay away from you, I hope you know that,” he grumbled.

“I honestly don’t know what I was thinking, please forgive me,” I whisper as tears start to well up in my eyes.

He moves to the side a little bit and grabs my chin to look up at him

“Just promise me that you won’t go and do anything stupid like that again.” I nod and a small smile forms on his face as he wraps his arms around me. “You’re such a jerk,” he chuckles.

I don’t respond, just smile to myself and enjoy the moment. I’m glad that Jack forgave me; I’ll just have to see if Rick will. I mean yeah, I know that I said that I wanted to look for another job, but let’s be realistic; I love working there. Plus if I just leave, that’ll make me look immature, and then I’ll never get to mend our friendship. Jack breaks my thoughts when he pushes away.

“C’mon, you have to get to work,” he says, getting up.

“Never,” I groan.

I spread myself across the floor, not wanting to leave the comfort of my room. He shrugs and picks me up, placing me over his shoulder. Then he throws his jacket on me to keep me warm. I roll my eyes as he walks out of my room and closes the door behind us. He walks out of the dorm and out to the field before letting me down.

“You’re too heavy to carry all the way over there.”

“Gee thanks,” I smile sarcastically.

He puts his arm around my waist as we continue walking to the mall I mentally prepare myself to face Rick, ready to apologize for my actions. A nice speech would have been fine, but no; I had to slap the guy. We get into the elevator and I press my floor button, tapping my foot nervously as we wait.

“Calm down babe, I’m here.” Jack kisses my forehead.

Just like that, Jack and I are back to normal. I feel even worse now for being stupid and getting drunk again; Jack would never do that to me. If he ever did, I know that it would take way longer for me to get over it than it took him. What a great guy. The door opens and we make our way to Jamba Juice. Jack was ready to confront Rick. I hope this goes well.