Better Together

Using his one hand, John fingered the ring that had been stuffed into his jacket’s pocket all night, whereas his other was holding his girlfriend’s firmly as they walked down the streets of Paris. It had always been their dream to visit the city together, and when he was younger he’d promised Ace that someday, he would take her there, regardless of what age they were and whatever the circumstances were by that point.

The O’Callaghans and the Donovans had been friends for so long, both families of Irish descent in the neighbourhood. When John’s parents met Ace’s parents, they instantly became friends, and thus began the thousands of barbeque parties held on either of their houses, trips to other cities including their homeland, and combined birthday parties of the O’Callaghans’ oldest son and the Donovans’ youngest daughter which sparked a competitive hate between the two, which, of course, as cliché as it was, brought on a huge amount of teasing from their families that someday, they’d end up getting married.

John was three years older than her, but it didn’t make him the matured one. He egged her on constantly, and considered it an achievement whenever he made her mad. He liked how she always got mad at him whenever he called her by her full name, Aislinn Meckenzie, but as time passed by she’d grown to love the way her name rolled off her lips.

John was 14 when he started thinking that Ace was pretty.

Ace was 15 when she entertained the possibility that she liked John.

John was 16 when he first kissed her, out of a dare.

Ace was 17 when she got plastered and confessed to John that she liked him.

And it changed everything between them. Before John left for tour, they started dating. But then the band got signed, ultimately putting a strain on the relationship, and they decided to break things off. But every time John came home, they would reconnect, and whenever he left, they would disconnect.

John was 23 when his father gave him the ring, the one passed on from his great grandmother, a family heirloom that he never thought he would get, since it wasn’t exactly a secret that when he and Ace broke it off for what he deemed was the last time, he’d gone on a downward spiral consisting of dubious amounts of alcohol, weed, and an infamous string of one-night stands. But his father handed it off to him, with a wink, claiming that he’d need to give it to Ace someday.

Up until he turned 24, he didn’t think he’d need it. What changed his perspective, was Ace walking back into his life, eight months after receiving the ring. He’d been so ready to propose the moment she said she was still in-love with him, but he always got cold feet when it came to actually doing it. One night, he’d come close to proposing, but bit it back when she started talking about her plans of going to law school.

He thought of it all, their entire journey, as he and his girlfriend continued to make the walk back to the hotel. Girlfriend. Who’d have thought? But here he was, strolling down the city of love with his lovely companion, and he was happy.

Was he?

“Penny for your thoughts?”

She chuckled, making him turn his head towards her, a smirk now invading his whole face as she stood on her toes and planted a kiss on his cheek. He grinned down at her, taking in her vivid blue eyes, her mouth curled up at the sides, her perfect white teeth showing- and then he glanced down at her body, God it was perfect- he couldn’t help but think of her underneath him, what he wanted to do with her once they got back to the hotel, and what she was willing to do to and for him.

“You look like you’re lost in your thoughts,” she mused, reaching her hand up to ruffle his hair. “You okay babe?”

“Yeah, I am,” he murmured, leaning down so he could kiss her on the lips. “Just thinking about you, as usual.”

She giggled, launching into a story about her vacation in Italy and it wasn’t long until they got to the hotel. John had been so ready to get into their room and completely rid himself of the doubt he’d been feeling since, well, the start of the relationship, but he wasn’t exactly lucky when it came to his wants.

“John?”

His breath got hitched at the sound of that voice, one he would never forget, even in another lifetime. He moved his gaze to that figure standing by the elevator, and he felt as though his whole world had stopped. She was still as beautiful as ever, with her long brown hair cascading down her shoulders, her green eyes popping out at him as if she was so surprised to see him- she’d always been easily surprised, something he always thought was cute. It had almost been a year since he last saw her, but he could still remember the feeling of her skin against his. He would never forget her. Ever.

“Ace?” he mumbled, blinking as he let go of his girlfriend’s hand without reluctance and walked over to her. “What are you doing here?”

Recovering from her shock, she glanced at the scowling girl beside him, and offered her a small smile. “I, uh, just a little vacation,” she explained, nodding at him and then letting her gaze flicker over to the girl once more. “Nice to see you and Sara.”

He let out an awkward laugh, glancing to his girlfriend and trying to lace their hands together once more, but she simply shrugged him off. “Uh, yeah, good to see you, too,” he said, nodding and motioning to the hotel. “You staying here?”

“Actually, yes.” She chuckled, showing him her key-card awkwardly, and shrugging. “I, uh, um. I’m alone.”

“That’s funny, because no one asked,” Sara snapped, crossing her arms over her chest as she glared at the girl who she knew owned her boyfriend’s heart. “Listen, if you’re here to-”

“Sara.” John held her back, throwing an apologetic glance at Ace as he tried to control her girlfriend. “Baby, please.”

She felt the bile rise up her throat upon hearing the endearment. He used to call her that- of course it was a universal nickname for your significant other, but she never expected to have somebody else to call that, and especially not in front of her.

“Whatever.” Sara scoffed, pushing John away from her and heading to the elevator. “I’m going up. You better fucking follow once you’re done with this.”

Shooting Ace an annoyed glance, the beautiful blonde walked into the elevator and pushed the close button, leaving the old lovers in the hotel lobby, feeling as awkward as ever. Neither could stay in the same place with the other for long without jumping back into each other’s arms or yelling out the most horrible words they could think of.

“Sorry about that.” John chuckled lightly, rubbing his neck as he peeked a glance at her. “She’s still pissed about the whole- you know- thing.”

“You mean the whole arriving late on her birthday to come pick me up from the airport and then breaking up with her altogether when she bitched about having me there thing?” She snickered, making John laugh as he shook his head and kept his eyes on her.

“That’s what I meant by ‘you know’.” He smirked, she smiled, and there was a flicker of something neither could pinpoint but it lingered, and both of them knew they should leave before a chance encounter became something else, but no one between them moved. John sighed, lifting a hand up to rake his hair with. “So, how’ve you been?”

She shrugged, knowing this was small talk, so it was harmless- but she should’ve known that when it came to her and John, nothing was exactly harmless. “Good,” she said, nodding to herself and shoving her hands on her pockets. “Really good, um, you?”

He nodded, biting his lip and containing his honestly. He would never be ‘good’ without her. “I’m all right.”

“You and Sara are back together again, huh?” she mused, keeping a smile on her face but averting his gaze. “Almost, what- eight months, all in all?”

“Didn’t know you were keeping track,” he teased, chuckling as he tried to look straight into her eyes. “Yes, almost eight. Two months before that whole thing, and turning six in a few weeks.”

She nodded, knowing exactly what happened after he and Sara broke up then- she’d confessed to John that she was still in-love with him, and they started dating once more, until- well, until life happened.

“What’s going on with you?” he asked, curious as to what she was into now. Her name meant ‘dreamer’, and she stayed true to it, having all these dreams and goals that constantly changed gradually, but they were just that, dreams. She never acted on it. “How’s law school?”

She smiled shyly at him, licking her lips as she shrugged. “Well, I, uh, flaked,” she said, tilting her head slightly. “I didn’t go through with it- I’m back to writing.”

John blinked, his smile completely fading as he registered her words. “You’re not in law school?” he asked, the words barely audible. “W- why?”

She shrugged once more, avoiding his intense gaze and keeping her eyes on the floor. “I, uh, I just- well I passed the exam, but- but I realized- I don’t know, that I don’t want it as much as I want to write. So I picked.”

“Well,” John regained his composure, but didn’t fight off the bitterness as her words sunk in. “guess you always come back to that one thing, huh?”

“John, I-”

“No, it’s not fair, Aislinn,” he snapped, but kept his voice low as not to create a commotion. “Hell I pushed you to write, to pursue it because it’s what you’ve always wanted- but then you said you want to be a lawyer- that’s why you broke up with me- and now you’re telling me that dream is down the drain too, after you swore-”

“No, John- we broke up because you couldn’t be sure whether the feeling would last, with me in law school and you constantly touring,” she shot back, keeping her voice just as low. “But it doesn’t matter now- you’re back with Sara, and-”

“And I’m not happy,” he stated, wiping his face with his hand as he embraced his honesty. “Shit, I’m not happy- I can’t be- not without you, you know that.”

Ace saw the sincerity in his eyes, but she didn’t want acknowledge it, because if she did, then this would end one way, and he’d end up hurting Sara, who could give him the stability he always sought with her. “You can be,” she mumbled, keeping her gaze on her hands. “If you just, uh, try to forget about me.”

“Like that’s possible.” He scoffed, moving to stand in front of her. He grabbed her arm and she flinched at the sudden contact, but he simply lifted her chin, using his other hand, making their gazes meet. “You know you’re the one for me, no matter what.”

She blinked, letting out a deep breath as she looked away from him. No, she didn’t want to get through this again only to hurt them both in the end. At the end of day, she wanted John- she would always want him, but she couldn’t go through with it anymore. “John, you broke up with me, twice,” she said lowly. “You made that decision, and you can make it once again- I’m not going down that road, no.”

He rolled his eyes, moving his hand down her arm but not letting go. “Please. I would have married you at 19 if you wanted me to.”

She laughed bitterly, moving away from him as she crossed her arms against her chest. “Yeah, whatever, need I remind you of your first break-up speech? You’re young, you want the world, we want different things-”

“You were young,” John seethed, his voice raising a bit but he tried to keep himself calm. “You were barely 19 then- hell, when I was 19, I-”

“I was in-love¬with you,” she insisted, drawling out the word. “And you doubted that.”

He looked at her as if she was crazy. “Of course I doubted it! There was no assurance that you loved me- what if you were just in-love with the idea of love? You swore writing was the career for you, then one day you stopped; you kept moving on to different things, why the fuck won’t that scare me? I needed stability; then you grew up and I thought, well, you could give it to me- but then you started talking law school.”

“Well, good news.” She smiled tightly at him as she tilted her head to the right, knowing he wouldn’t like her next words. “Sara can give you stability.”

John sighed, straightening his posture as he raked his hands through his unruly hair. “You and I both know we’re better together,” he said, stating what he knew was the truth. He couldn’t count on his fingers how many songs he’d written for her. He was stupidly in-love with her and everyone in his life knew that.

“Well, maybe we’ll be best without each other,” she said, looking at him and studying his expression, that typical competitive look on his face- and then soon, it softened, and he let out another sigh.

“You’re so stubborn,” he mumbled.

“Part of my charm.” She shrugged, pressing the elevator button up and then moving to the other one and doing the same. She looked at him, giving him an acknowledging nod as he stood there simply staring at her. She didn’t want to press the issue any further; she just wanted him to be away from her. “I’m gonna keep out of your way- I’ll be sure to move to another hotel tomorrow.”

John didn’t say anything; instead he faced the elevator in front of him, waiting for it to open because her presence was now too much to take. They never did go to Paris together, but now they were both here, at the same time, and it was highly likely that life was playing a trick on them.

When the elevator doors opened, he took a step forward, but stopped himself. He took out the piece of jewelry resting in his pocket, grabbed Ace’s wrist and shoved the ring onto her palm. “Take it,” he said simply, avoiding all eye contact as he balled her hand into a fist. “Without you I have no use for it.”

He stepped inside the elevator, pushing the close button and stealing a glance at her- she was frozen, her eyes wide open as she stared on the ring she was holding. By the time she looked up, the elevator doors had already closed and she was left there with her heart pumping at its fastest.

One thing was for sure, getting over John O’Callaghan was never going to happen.