Love Letters

Stepping out of the shower, Zack wrapped a towel around his waist and headed for his bedroom. Skirting around the bed, his jade colored eyes landed on his fiancé who was still sound asleep.
Smiling softly, he chuckled when she reached out and grabbed his pillow, wrapping her arms around it and sighing as she nestled her face against it. Quietly pulling on a pair of boxers and basketball shorts, the guitarist then headed down the stairs and into the kitchen.

He let Moot and Ichabod out, and didn’t bother calling for Duke as he knew the old grump wouldn’t get out of bed until Paige did. Rubbing his hands together, Zack set out to make coffee once that was brewing; he moved to start making pancakes. Pulling out the necessary items, Zack let his mind wander back to the conversation he’d had with Matt’s wife Taryn, a few nights before.

“I don’t know what’s gotten up your ass Zachary Baker, but you better figure it out and quick. You’ve been pretty shitty to Paige since you’ve gotten back from tour!” Her words were sharp, blue eyes shooting sparks as she pointed at him. “It’s ridiculous!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Tar.” He muttered, taking a drag off of his cigarette. He met her eyes for a moment, and when he saw the anger swirl in them, decided to look over her shoulder and out towards the ocean.

“Let’s think about this for a moment shall we? You’ve had her running all over hells creation doing mundane shit for you, that you’re capable of doing yourself. All of the shit she’s been doing for VU, on top of working her regular job? She’s exhausted Zack! Not to mention you’ve not once, that I’m aware of, showed her how much you appreciate everything that she’s done lately.”

“That’s not true; she knows how much that means to me.”

“Zack. Seriously. She may know, but it doesn’t hurt to show it every once in a while. When’s the last time you bought her flowers? Or the last time you just did something as simple as taking her to a movie? Cooking dinner so that she doesn’t have to when she gets home from work?”

“Taryn, we’ve been so busy with the new record…and tour. It’s been hectic.”

“Do you think that’s stopped Matthew? No, just so you know, it hasn’t.”

Zack flicked his cigarette to the ground with a sigh, knowing that Taryn was right. He’d noticed how distant, and tired, Paige had seemed over the past few days. He ran his tongue over his bottom lip as he gave his head a frustrated shake, “I know I’ve been an ass lately, but I really don’t know why.
Stress from all of the shit we’ve had to do lately? Pent up frustration from tour? I don’t know…I love her more than anything, ‘Ryn.” He whispered, running one tattooed hand over the top of his head, “I don’t want to push her away, or lose her—I can’t.”

Taryn’s gaze softened then and she reached out gently and squeezed his shoulder, “I know, Zee. Just—all you have to do is show her that she’s still appreciated. I know it’s easy to get lost in all of this, and it’s even harder for you all to go through this without Jimmy. That weighs heavily on your shoulders…but you can’t forget about those who are still here, and stand by your side no matter what.”

Zack wrapped the woman he’d come to love like a sister up in a hug and squeezed her tight. “Thanks ‘Ryn, for kicking my ass back into line whenever I need it.” Taryn laughed, planting a kiss on his cheek,

“That’s what I’m here for.”

Flipping a pancake, Zack made sure to flatten it out, knowing that Paige didn’t like her pancakes too fluffy. Stepping away from the stove for a moment, he went and grabbed a cup of coffee before letting the dogs back into the house. Plating the pancakes that he’d made, he grabbed two forks from the drawer and made sure to pile syrup onto the pancakes before making another cup of coffee for Paige. Grabbing the coffee mugs in one hand, and the plate of pancakes in the other, he made his way upstairs.

Shouldering his way back into his bedroom, he set everything in his hands onto his bedside table and climbed onto the bed. Ignoring the grunts of protest that Duke grumbled out, Zack leaned down and pressed a kiss against Paige’s temple and nose. Chuckling when her eyes fluttered, he murmured,

“Morning sleepy head.”

Paige rolled onto her back, stretching her arms up over her head with a sigh. Looking over to her fiancé, she smiled softly,

“Morning, what time is it?”

“Around ten-thirty.”

“Shit, why didn’t you wake me up earlier? I would have made breakfast.”

“Already taken care of, babe.” Zack grinned, rolling over and grabbing her mug of coffee while she pulled herself to sit up against the headboard, handing that to her, he then grabbed the plate of pancakes and their forks.

“Oh wow, Zee! These look awesome.” Paige grinned, looking up at him for a moment before taking one of the forks from him and cutting off a piece of the hotcake. Popping it into her mouth, she sighed happily. “Mm. They taste even better.”

“Well, I am capable of manning a kitchen pretty well.” Zack snorted, “If I remember correctly, I cooked for you on one of our first dates.”

“You did!” Paige grinned, licking extra syrup from her fork, “It was fucking awesome. If this whole ‘rock star’ thing wouldn’t have worked out for you, you should have went on Master Chef or something.”

Zack laughed, his full lips pulling into a smile when Paige leaned over and pressed a kiss to his lips.

Settling back against the headboard, he took a sip of his coffee. The both of them picking at the pancakes until they were full, Paige even sneaking a few pieces to Duke. Once they were finished, Zack set the plate aside and took Paige’s now empty mug from her as well. Flopping back into the bed, he hummed in happiness when Paige rubbed his tattooed belly.

“So, what are the plans for the day?” She murmured, resting her head against his shoulder as she danced her fingers over his tattooed skin.

“Whatever you want to do babe, it’s up to you.”

“Up to me?” She asked, reaching up and feeling his forehead, “Are you not feeling well? What’s going on?” She teased, giggling softly when Zack snatched her hand and kissed her fingertips before nipping at them playfully.

“Oh hush,” Zack shot back, tunneling his tattooed fingers through her hair, “Why don’t you go and take your time getting ready, and think about what you want to do while you are?”

“Sounds good to me,” Paige smiled, clambering over so that she could straddle his waist, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as she brushed her lips over his, “I love you.”

“I love you, too, babe.” He murmured, squeezing her hips in his hands gently. Leaning forward so that he could brush his lips over her shoulders and collarbone, happy when he felt her fingers skim through his dark hair. Smiling against her skin when he heard her mutter,

“Now, if you start that we’re going to be in this bed all day.”

Zack watched his fiancée as she sat next to Taryn, her laughter filling his ears. He took a sip from the amber bottle that dangled from his tattooed fingers. Looking up when a shadow passed over him, he smiled when Matt plopped down in the sand next to him.

“You did well, man. She looks happy.”

“All I did was make her breakfast and take her to the Aqurium of the Pacific.” Zack muttered, shrugging his bare shoulders. “Then she wanted to come home and spend the day on the beach.”

“But you made it about her, and that’s what matters.” Matt clapped a hand over his shoulder, and shook it, “That’s all she needed.”

“Babe!” Paige hollered, making Zack swing around to look at her as she danced her way over to him, sundress fluttering in the soft HB breeze.

“Yes?” He chuckled when she plopped into his lap, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

“I guess there’s supposed to be fireworks tonight; do you care if we stay out and watch them?”

“Of course not,” He pressed his plump lips against her shoulders as an idea popped into his head, his eyes trained on her crimson dipped toes as she buried them into the sand. “I’ll run home let the dogs out, and grab some jackets in case it cools off tonight.”

“Sounds like a plan.” She murmured, tipping her head down to press a kiss against his lips, “I love you.”

“Love you, too, babes.” He returned, smiling up at her and catching her whiskey colored gaze with his jade orbs. Reaching up and tucking one stray piece of hair that had escaped her braid, back behind her ear. “More than anything.” He whispered, nuzzling his nose into the soft crook of her shoulder. Nipping at her skin, he grinned when she shuddered lightly, taking the tip of his ear between her teeth as retaliation.

“Get outta here,” She laughed, climbing out of his lap and leaning down to kiss him again, “I’ll be here when you get back.”

“Alright, alright.” He chuckled, pulling himself up out of the sand, and surprising Paige when he caught her around the waist and spun them around in a circle. “Don’t have too much fun without me.”

She laughed, slightly breathless after the spinning and stepped up onto the tips of her painted toes to catch his lips in a kiss. “Never.” Paige muttered, pecking his lips again before stepping away from him and turning when Taryn called her name. Once Zack had reached the boardwalk, he shot off a text to
Taryn, explaining to her what he had in mind, and that he needed her help.

“What did he say, again?” Paige asked, worrying her bottom lip as Matt and Taryn pulled up in front of the home that she and Zack shared.

“He said that Moot took off when he went to let her out, and that he was going to look for her, so he asked us to bring you home.”

“Shit.” Paige sighed, “Alright, thanks you guys. Have fun at the fireworks tonight, I’m going to call Zee and see if he wants me to help look for Moot. Love you, guys.”

“Love you, too.” Matt and Taryn echoed, trying to keep the smiles from their faces and look solemn so that they wouldn’t ruin the plans that Zack had laid out. “If you need any help looking for Moot, just let
us know okay?” Matt said, leaning out of the driver’s side window to give Paige a kiss on the cheek.

“Alright, thanks.” She patted his cheek, and went around to the passenger side and gave Taryn a hug before heading into the house. Pulling her phone from her purse, she dialed Zack’s number and held it to her ear as she started up the stairs. Frowning when she heard the clatter of paws on tile, she turned back and gasped when she saw Moot standing in front of her, just as the line connected,

“Hello?”

“Zack! What’s going on? Moot’s at the house…where are you?”

“I know she’s at the house,” Paige could hear the smile staining his tone, “I want you to do something for me, babe.”

“Okay…” She murmured, eyebrows drawn together in a frown, “What would that be?”

“I want you to go upstairs, to our bedroom, and I have something up there for you. I want you to read it. All of it, and then you’ll know what to do next.”

“Okay…” She repeated, padding up the carpeted stairs and towards their bedroom.

“Don’t sound so concerned,” Zacky chuckled, “I love you, babe. I’ll see you in a little bit.”

“I love you, too.” She listened to the line go dead after that, and pulled her phone from her ear, gasping softly when she entered their room. The bed was covered in roses, and sitting in the center of the roses were a stack of letter with a red ribbon tied around them. Sitting on the bed gently, she took the letters from the bed and untied the ribbon, her eyes scanning over the words that were scribbled over the first page in Zacky’s signature left handed scrawl.

Paige,
I’ve had these letters for some time now, and I really never knew when I intended to give them to you. They span from the time that we first got together, to more recent times. But, I’ve come to realize that I haven’t been the best to you lately.

She could see where he had let the pen sit against the paper for a moment too long, as the ink had started to soak into the paper. She swallowed, feeling tears start to prick at the backs of her eyes, already.

But, I want you to know that I love you more than anything else in this world. You mean everything to me, and I’m so sorry that I haven’t taken the time to show you that lately. I’m so lucky to have you in my life, and to be able to call you mine. Although I’m not to best with words, I hope these letters will help to show you that.
I love you. Z.

Setting the first piece of paper aside, she unfolded the first letter and started to read.

We went on our third official date, today. We decided to just drive along the coast, and see where we ended up. We even loaded up a cooler, just in case. When I pulled up to pick you up, the first thing that I noticed was the smile that you had on your face. You were so excited over something as simple as just taking a drive. I like that about you, you enjoy the simple things. I kept stealing glances at you while I was driving, catching those smiles that you thought I didn’t see. Or when you finally got frustrated enough with your hair, and pulled it up into a pony tail, but you still had those stray pieces of hair framing your face. The blush that crept up on your cheeks when I tucked one of those loose hairs behind your ear? That was one of my favorite things from today.

Paige smiled as she read through the letters, stopping to read over some more than once, as Zacky’s words brought all of the memories rushing back into her head, like they were playing on a silver screen inside her mind.

You slept at my place for the first time today. In fact, you’re asleep in my bed right now. As I write this. And I just want you to know, that you do snore even though you try like hell to deny it. :) I let you borrow one of my shirts, because you forgot to bring a sleep shirt of your own. But, can I confess something? I was hoping you would. I love the way my shirt looks on you, because it’s just long enough to skirt your thighs, leaving your legs bare. You fell asleep during the movie, after promising that you wouldn’t. I hope that we have a lot more nights like these to come. Because, I could stay like this forever.

She could recall that day like it was yesterday. She sniffled with a laugh, wiping at her eyes with the backs of her hands as she continued to read. Her fingers absentmindedly played with her engagement ring as she did. Turning the letters upside down on top of one another as she read them, so that they would stay in the order that Zacky had written them in.

Today was the day that I realized I’m in love with you. We went to my sisters to see my newborn nephew, and when you held him…the look in your eyes when you looked up at me, and the soft smile that you had on your face? I knew. I knew right then and there that there wasn’t anyone else that I could imagine spending my life with. Seeing him cradled in your arms, all I could picture and hope was that would be us someday. But you would be holding our baby, smiling at me like that. I can’t wait for that day, Paige.

She’d read through almost all of the letters, and found herself wishing that there were more to read. She’d laughed, and cried through some of them. Finally realizing how much she actually meant to him. She knew that he loved her, loved her as much as she loved him, but she never knew that he’d loved her just as long as she had loved him, and as deeply as she felt that she loved him.

She sighed as she reached the last letter, and as she unfolded it, she noticed that it held the current date. Pulling her bottom lip between her teeth, she started to read the words that he had hastily scrawled, more than likely an attempt to get it finished before she came walking in the door.

I realized the other day (thanks to Taryn giving me a swift kick in the ass) that I haven’t been the best to you lately. I know that I have a lot of making up to do for that, and I can only hope that you’ll let me. I don’t have a clue why you put up with me, or how you stuck by my side through all of the shit that I’ve been through. But, I’m so thankful that you have. I wouldn’t be the man I am today, if it weren’t for you, Babe. I want you to know that. You’ve made me a better person. You are my everything. If I lost every that I have…I know that if I still have you, I could make it. I love you, so much, and I hope that by sharing these letters with you…that I’ve made at least a dent into how much. I’ll be waiting down on the beach, come and find me when you’re ready, okay? I love you.

Refolding the letter with shaky hands, she set it on top of the rest and reached up to wipe her eyes.

“Oh, Zack…I love you, too.” She whispered, as she reached out and grabbed one of the roses, running her finger along the petals. Taking a moment to compose herself before she stood and made her way to their bathroom to wash off her face. Letting out a laugh when she seen how red and puffy her eyes where.

“Fuck.” She cursed, with a short laugh, pressing a cool washcloth to them for a few moments, but giving up when that didn’t help with the puffiness around her eyes. Smoothing out her hair, she grabbed her jacket off of the bed and made her way downstairs.

The sand was cool against her bare feet as she trekked across it, thankful that the moon was full enough to cast some light so that she could see. Slowing her pace, she looked around for her fiancé, and smiled when she spotted him standing at the edge of the shore, the water lapping up and around his ankles as he looked out over it. She came up behind him quietly, and wrapped her arms around his trim middle, resting her forehead against the center of his broad shoulders.

“Thank you.” She whispered as he intertwined his fingers with hers, giving them a gentle squeeze. “I love you, Zack.” He let her rest against his back for a moment, before gently tugging her around to face him. Running his rough hands up her arms, he cupped her face in his tattooed hands and ran his thumbs under her eyes to catch the few stray tears that were leaking from the corners of her eyes.

Zack lowered his mouth to hers, catching her lips in a slow and meaningful kiss. His fingers tangled into her hair as hers curled into the fabric that now covered his shoulders; she pressed herself onto her tiptoes to deepen their kiss. Zacky broke their kiss with a small gasp, wrapping his arms around her and hauling her against his sturdy body to hold her. Burying his face into her hair, he inhaled the scent that was uniquely hers, and had become a comfort to him.

“I love you, too, Paige.” He murmured, pulling back so that he could meet her gaze. Just as he started to lean in to reconnect their lips, a firework exploded in the sky.

“Oh!” Paige gasped happily, “I forgot all about the fireworks tonight.”

Zack laughed, sinking down into the sand and bringing her with him. Settling her body between his knees, so that her back was resting against his chest and he could wind his arms around her waist. Resting his chin on the top of her head, he watched as the fireworks shot into the sky, raining down in various colors and shapes. The uneasy knot in his stomach had loosened the moment that she had wrapped her arms around his waist. He knew then that he would be alright, that they would be alright.

“By the way!” Paige muttered suddenly, slapping him in the chest. “I do not snore!”

Zacky collapsed back into the sand, his laughter rumbling out of his chest. He let out an ‘oophm!’ when Paige pounced on top of him. She leaned over him so that their noses touched.

“You take that back!”

The dark hair guitarist grinned, wrapping his arms around her and rolling them so that he had the upper hand. Nuzzling his nose into her neck, he nipped the sensitive skin under her ear and whispered as the fireworks burst over their heads,

“Never.”