Time Bomb

Life had been good, until Riley had decided to do things her way. Josh hated having to be an asshole, but if it’s what the day called for he was ready.

“Give it to me, Riley.” Josh demanded holding his hand out to his cousin, his blue eyes raging.

“Give you what?” Riley asked trying not to react to him.

How did Josh know? Riley took a deep breath as Josh towered over her, fuming. She had made sure there would have been no way for Josh to see her. Unless...fuck him! Riley mentally cursed; trying to remember which way Zack Merrick had went after he’d saw her this morning. No, she was sure he was gone back to his own bus. Besides, the other band wouldn’t rat her out would they? What was it to them what she did?

Riley shoved passed Josh, heading for the bathroom, someplace he wouldn’t follow but he sure as hell would stand outside. Shutting the door and locking it, Riley took a deep breath and closed her eyes trying to remember her exact movements.

The chilly air had stung the second Riley slipped off of the large black and silver bus. Saskatoon sure was cold this morning and as the tour went on, they were only going to get colder weather. Huddling into her oversized hoodie, Riley shivered and found a bit of shelter behind the large trailer full of equipment, which got pulled along behind the bus. If Josh saw her, she’d be dead. The aim was not to let Josh or anybody see her.

It was almost eight in the morning, what self respecting band or crew member was awake and outside at this hour? Peeking across the lot at the other bus, Riley felt a little relieved to see that the big, thick black curtains were also pulled shut. Pulling the joint out of her pocket, Riley flicked her lighter and took a long drag, slowly enjoying.

“A bit early for that, isn’t it?”

“What’s it to you?” Riley asked defensively, snuffing out her joint and pocketing it.

“Nothing, but it may be something to someone if you get caught.” The guy replied stretching his arms over his head and letting them go. “Zack.”

“Yeah, I remember you. Were you too good to talk to me a few days ago?” Riley questioned.

Zack shook his head. “No, I was only following rules. I was told to stay away; I don’t need my ass handed to me.”

Strange boy, Riley mused as Zack headed off toward...his own bus, with his phone in hand. Would he really rat her out to Josh? Shoving her hand in her pocket, clutching the contents tightly, she groaned when Josh banged on the door demanding some more. Swinging the door open, Riley glared at him going toe to toe.

“What do you want?” she snapped, causing a tired looking Ian to jump in surprise as he pushed passed Josh to the front lounge.

“Hand it over.” Josh said holding his hand out to Riley.

“Hand what over?”

“Give me the fucking joint, Riley!” Josh demanded. “I want any fucking drugs you have. Now!?

“Why? Why do you think I have drugs?” Riley questioned, not wanting to burst into tears. Not now.

“Because I know what you’ve been up to in the morning and any other time of the day you think we’re not paying attention. I have my ways.” Josh informed his cousin, blocking her from exiting the bathroom properly and folding his hands across his chest.

“Busted.” Riley heard Matt and Mike sing out from their respective bunks. It was scary how the two of them shared a brain.

Shaking her head at the two of them, Riley folded her arms across her chest staring Josh down. If he thought she was going to cave and give in that easily he was crazy. So what if she had the occasional puff off of a joint. Weed was weed and compared to some other things she could be in to, Riley felt as though Josh were only overreacting. Besides, she had only done it once since stepping on this god forsaken bus and that was this morning.

“Riley.” Josh softened his voice and lowered his gaze, showing a sign of respect but not that he was about to back down.

“What does it matter what I do? Why do you even care what I do?” Riley shouted at him.

“I’m here to fucking help you!” Josh shouted back. “I can’t help, if you’re acting like this! Riles, this isn’t a pretty path and I don’t want you going down that. You’re better than this!”

“You’re not my saviour, Josh.” Riley stated in a cold tone, her eyes were just as cold.

“No, but I still want to set you on the right way.” Josh offered. “How could you be so fucking stupid? You know you’re not allowed to drink or use drugs, any form of them!”

“You’re not my father, Josh. You’re not my guardian or my counselor, you’re my fucking cousin.” Riley hissed glaring at him.

“And I’m trying to act like one!”

“No, you’re trying to save me from becoming what you were, but there’s a different between us.” Riley said poking him in the chest.

“Yeah, I got the help I needed.” Josh spat back at her.

“I’m not making the same mistakes. I’m going about this a lot smarter than you did.” Riley scoffed.

Who was she trying to kid? There was no smart way to go about this; Josh wasn’t an idiot despite what she thought. He had seen the path Riley was heading for and he wanted her off of that road before it got too far. If Josh had to lock her in a bunk and not let her out for the remainder of the tour, he would. Yes, Josh understood that Riley would see this as over reacting, but if he let this go then what else was she going to try?

“Yeah, because getting brought home by the RCMP after being found downtown drunk and passed out on a side walk is smart. Or what about being arrested for being in possession of illegal substance, three times? Huh? Oh, maybe the solicitation accusations are the smarter part?” Josh listed off her most recent offences in the last year and a half.

“I’m not a whore.” Riley mumbled.

“No, but you stole a fucking car Riles!” Josh added. How could he forget the car? “You’re lucky you aren’t in jail!”

Unable to find something to say against the truth, Riley opted for an eye roll.

“I love you, Riley Lin. Your mother loves you, your real friends and the rest of your family. We all love you, but you don’t give a fuck.” Josh argued. He refused to break. “Look around at the fucking people who care! You have four, five if you include Ian, right here and right now who want to see you get through this.” Josh and Riley both chuckled when he said Ian, knowing that Ian had no real love for Riley and felt she was a spoiled brat.

“You still have no right trying to dictate my life.” Riley answered, handing over what Josh wanted.

“Oh, no, you’re wrong. As long as you are my responsibility, on my bus, on my tour and under my watch I do.” Josh finished with a smug smile and a firm nod.

“Whatever, just give Matt and Ian the drugs and let them take what they please. You seem to have no problem with their drug use.” Riley sneered as she turned back toward the front of the bus.

Getting off of the bus and away from Josh couldn’t happen fast enough. Sniffling, Riley wiped her nose and tears off on her shirt sleeve. Trudging across the lot she didn’t care if the bus left without her. If she were lucky maybe they would leave and she could find a way back to Vancouver. Inside she knew Josh was still brooding, which would prompt Mike to talk to him while Ian and Matt sat silently, hanging their heads because now Riley had made it personal.

Rounding the corner of the second bus, Riley sobbed and flopped down on the pavement into a heap, not wanting to move. All she wanted was to go home. It hadn’t been that long and already she felt like shit for having Josh hate her. As much shit as she had caused her family in the last few years, Josh never failed to stand up for her and he was always willing to help her pick up and turn life around. Why couldn’t she just hand him over what he had wanted and saved the argument?

Now when she went back, Josh was going to go back to treating her like he had the last time he had tried to help her and she’d failed. Josh had let her move in with him for a month, to get her act together and Riley had ended that by almost overdosing and landing in a hospital for a week before Josh decided she wasn’t worth his time until she wanted to fix herself. Maybe this time was no different?

“Hey, something wrong?” a voice asked, causing Riley to burst into another fit of tears.

Something wrong? Ha! What wasn’t wrong?

“I’m so fucked up.” Riley sobbed hiding her head in her hands. “I just got into a huge fight with the one person left who sees me as the same sweet person I was before this shit.”

“Hey, hey whoa calm down.” The guy said taking a seat next to Riley on the cold ground and wrapping his arm around her shivering body. “Here, I just got this but you can use it more.” He handed her his Styrofoam coffee cup and let her take a sip.

“T-thanks.” Riley mumbled taking another sip of the hot chocolate.

“So, why are we crying?” he asked wiping her tears with his gloved hand.

“Because my entire life is fucking messed up.” Riley confessed. “I have a lot of issues and my cousin, Josh, is trying to help me.”

“So that’s why we were warned to stay far, far away from you.” He smirked moving his arm; instead he pulled off his jacket and wrapped it around her body. Fuck it was cold, but she needed it more. “I’m officially, Jack.”

“I’m officially, Riley.” Riley replied holding up her hot chocolate and giving him a weak smile. “Thanks for being nice, officially Jack.”

“So, I don’t want to pry but are you sure you’re okay?” Jack asked looking at her with his big brown eyes.

Riley had only seen him briefly a few times, but had never been close enough to realize how he pulled you in and kept you with those eyes. Jack smiled and blinked a few times at her, Riley tried to smile but it wasn’t much use. Finishing off the hot chocolate, still sitting on the cold pavement, she heaved a sigh and glanced around. Nice to see Josh hadn’t come after her.

“Do you want to come back inside and get warm?” Jack tried a new question, clearly she was not talking about why she was crying and upset.

“I should go back to my own bus. I wouldn’t want anybody in trouble.” Riley said softly.

“Oh, well come on. I’ll walk with you.” Jack said springing up to his feet and holding his hand out for Riley. Pulling her up off the ground he came face to face with her. Catching Jack staring at her, Riley cocked her head to the side and gave him a questioning look. “Sorry, you can probably walk on your own.” Jack added quickly.

Great, now she was going to think he was a babbling idiot with a staring problem.

“I think I’m good to walk maybe fifty feet.” Riley offered the saddest smile Jack had ever seen. “But thanks and Jack, I owe you a coffee.”