The Next Year

When I got home, I had a missed call from Sammy. That made me smile a lot, he had actually called me. He wanted to talk to me and hear my voice.

But then the doubt kicked in. What if he only wanted me for one thing? What if he thought I was going to be another ‘Angel’ to him? What if he’s doing it to make me look stupid in front of everyone at college, or as a bet?

I mean, he has got a bit of a reputation of being a smooth talker to get women into bed. He’s not exactly shy with bragging and he’s got this idea as ‘every hole’s a goal’. But then again, when he talks to me, I really feel like we make a connection. Like we understand each other, like we’re on the same page. God, all this thinking and mind fucking made me feel sick. Just ring him back Roxy, just do it.
I found Sammy’s name in my phone and clicked it, I heard the dialling tone and then his voice. His beautiful, raspy manly voice.

‘Hey babe, are you ok? You didn’t answer my call’
‘Yeah, I’m ok. I was listening to my music when I was walking home, so I didn’t hear the phone going’
‘Are you sure you’re ok? You don’t sound yourself, what’s up?’ I could hear the genuine concern in his voice, so I just went for it
‘Do you really like me Sam?’ I was so worried about his answer. I could feel my heart beating in my chest. I could hear my pulse rushing through my ears.
‘Are you really asking me that? Of course I do, what do you think?’
‘Well, I thought you were taking me for a joke, or doing it for a bet. My self confidence is so low, I guess I just can’t believe that someone like you would be interested in me’
‘Are you fucking kidding me? Do you really think I’m that much of a cunt to do this to you for a bet?’
‘No, but…’ he cut me off
‘Rox, just shut the fuck up for a second and let me finish! I’m not doing it for a bet, or to make you look stupid, I’m doing this because I want to. Because I like you for you. You’re hilarious, confident, beautiful and you’re a fucking nutter! You’re amazing. Don’t ever feel like that please, I beg you.’ He sighed and signified that he was finished talking to me.
I started to cry audibly, because nobody has ever said anything like that to me or about me, and it made me feel so happy, because I’ve actually found someone who likes me, for me. ‘Oh shit, no, please don’t cry. Don’t cry, I didn’t want to make you cry, aw fuck’

‘Shut up you tit head, they’re happy tears! You don’t know how much that means to me. And I feel exactly the same as you, like I don’t think I get along with anyone as well as I get on with you, I can be totally myself around you, and that you get me. It’s amazing. Totally amazing’
‘No you are amazing.’ We had a moment of silence, but it wasn’t awkward at all, it was bliss. Heavenly, heavenly silence. ‘Anyway, did you see Kaitlyn and Jack today?’ the mention of his name ruined my perfect moment.
‘No, why?’ I was intrigued, I know that Kait likes Jack a lot, and I know how much he means to her.
‘Well, while you were talking to Luke, I had a cheeky little look through the window, and they were kissing. Like, full on snogging each others faces off’ I had a rush of happiness for Kait, she so deserves this. I know she’s wanted this for ages.
‘I’m so happy for her. She’s liked him for a while now, so I’m so happy for her.’
‘Really? You’re not pissed off? Or Jealous?’ he asked with a question in his voice.
‘No, why would I be jealous? I’ve got everything I’ve ever wanted now, so why should this matter? If anything, I’m just super happy for Kait.’
‘Okay, if that’s what you say.’ He said, I could hear that he didn’t believe me.
‘Honestly, I am. I can say with 100% confidence that I feel nothing more than civility for Jack any more. She’s welcome to him. I’m just happy for her’
‘Really, after all the crying about him and saying how much you were in love with him for the past year, you don’t feel anything? I won’t be mad’
‘Honestly, I don’t, I think my affection was misplaced completely’
‘Okay then. That’s good, that’s really good. I’m so glad you don’t have feelings like that towards him anymore. Because you’re mine now ha ha ha’
‘Pshh whatever Sammy, if Tom Hiddleston came along tomorrow I’d be gone! Look I’ve got to go, so I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘HA, if Tom Hiddleston came along, I’d be gone tomorrow! And Boo, okay, see you tomorrow. I like you.’
‘I like you too. Bye’

I’m so happy. Me and Alexander are kinda together, I still don’t exactly know what we are, but it’s too early to put a label on it, and I don’t want to scare him away, but we’re more than we were yesterday. And now Whey- hey! Kaitlyn and Jack getting it on! About bloody time as well, everything is looking up!