Paint Me a Picture with Nothing

Chapter Nine

Alex never realized his stressful three months could be until now. Three months of just work. Three months of being locked away in his apartment until he finished each chapter. Three months without Taylor. That's the hardest part Alex has come to realize. He's been working his ass off in silence when he's been so accustomed to hearing Taylor typing away, the only indicator that she's still alive. The little things like how Taylor would make herself at home the second she walked in is what Alex missed the most. He missed her, and that was the reality check Alex was in need of.

As the author let his pen fall from his hand, he sat back in his desk chair and groaned. He's been listening to Jack go on and on about how he needs to go talk to Taylor, but that's easier sad than done. As he stared at the bright laptop screen, he rolled his eyes as Jack continued on with his long rant.

And lastly, get your head out of your ass! The girl is fucking trying to help you, stop pushing people away that are trying to help you! She's so sweet, why can't you see that?

Because I'm stupid...

And?

And I'm a dumb idiot that treated Taylor terribly.

And?!

Alex groaned as he looked at Jack's reply before typing his out, his his eyes itching to roll because this is typical of his best friend. He knew how to make Alex realize that he's wrong in a heartbeat.

And I'm a sucky person that doesn't appreciate the people that are trying to help me because I'm a stupid and dumb idiot.

Exactly, now go fix this before I cut your balls off for being a twat.

A chuckle left Alex's mouth because he knew that while Jack was trying to be serious, he failed miserably at it, but it was worth a shot for the Lebanese man.

Yeah, whatever. I'll talk to you later though.

Alex soon signed out of his Gmail and twirled in his chair for a few seconds before stopping when he heard a faint sound of yelling coming from next door. His heart immediately dropped when he heard Taylor's muffled voice.

"What the?" He mumbled as he looked at his wall with his eyebrows furrowed.

Will you please calm down? You're going to wake the whole apartment!" Alex heard Taylor say as she tried to talk over someone.

Good! They need to know that you managed to fuck up just once again! You nearly fucking killed me!"

The author tilted his head to the side before getting up and walking to his door. He slipped on his flip flops and stood by his door before flinching when he heard something hit against the wall, which was followed up by a frightened squeal. He quickly left his apartment and walked next to door before hesitantly knocking on the door. After waiting a good six minutes as muffled talking occurred, he was met with a sweaty and buff male who was a bit shorter than the author.

"Who the fuck are you?" The unknown man asked angrily. Alex knew that he was a bit out of the loop, but he was pretty confused because Taylor lives here, right?

"Alex, I live next door," Alex started as he held his hand out for the buff man to shake, only to get ignored. "Right... So I was wondering if Taylor was here."

Alex watched as the man furrowed his eyebrows and stood up straighter as he looked at Alex. "No." The author received in return to his request.

"But why not? I'm sure if she knew who was here, she'd let me talk to her."

"Look, I don't care what you're sure of, I said no and that's final." The man replied as he started to shut the door, only to get Alex's foot stopping it.

"Okay, who the hell do you think you are? You're not her, now are you? Nope, so let me talk to her because despite how much I love talking to an idiot who was more testosterone in his body than brain cells, I'm not in the mood to dumb down what I have to say. Now let me see her." Alex explained calmly before seeing the stranger's blood going to his head as he got angry, which only made a smirk appear on the author's face.

Before the man could say anything, he saw Taylor appear from the back, her eyes mostly red due to crying. "Zack, please leave him alone." She said quietly to said man.

"Whatever, we're not done talking about what you did." Zack mentioned to Taylor before walking away with his hands curling into fists.

"Who is that?" Alex asked almost instantly as he looked down at Taylor.

"Why are you even asking? It's not like you give a shit and you made it clear that you prefer me out of your life." Taylor answered quietly as she leaned against the door.

A groan nearly left Alex's mouth when he heard what Taylor said. He didn't realize that the way he acted towards her affected her this bad. "Okay, I'm sorry for the way I treated you, but it's just the way I act with people. I can't help it, and you should know I can't because nobody's perfect and everyone makes mistakes."

"Alex, you treat people like shit, like if they're fucking nothing." Taylor pointed out. "You don't even realize it. You think that your behavior is justified because it's the way you act." She replied sarcastically.

Alex sighed as he looked down. "It kinda is because I can't he-,"

"Don't even start, Alex, just don't. It's not the way you act, it's the way you are. You're selfish and inconsiderate of the people that are around you that want to help you!"

Alex stayed silent as he processed what Taylor said. He didn't want to admit that she was a bit correct, but these three months, he really that he was actually pushing away everyone. He pushed away his parents, he pushed away Taylor, and sooner or later, he's going to push away Jack. He swallowed a lump in his throat before coughing a little. "You know... These few months without you helping me have been hell. I feel like I'm not doing anything right because I don't have your reassure to let me know that maybe I'm not doing too shabby of a job. Everyday I've been curious to know how you've been, what you've been up to, hell, if you better without me. I used to think of you as just someone who works for me, but I was dumb, I still am dumb. Taylor, as much as I want to keep you out of my life and do things on my own, I can't. I can't sleep knowing that some protein shake addict is treating you like this. I can't go through life knowing that you don't give a fuck about me anymore, and I can understand. Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything, my behavior, my tone, even when we first met. I took you for granted and I'm truly sorry." He finished before giving Taylor a small yet forced smile and walked back to his apartment.

A quiet sigh left his mouth as he collapsed on his bed. The author stared up at his ceiling and squeezed his eyes shut when all he saw was Taylor. He looked over at his phone and called the only person he knew that was good with dealing with women problems, and Alex quickly realized that he was having one of those problems.

---

“So you pulled your signature ‘I’m Alex Gaskarth, I can get away with anything I want because my hair is pretty’ act?” Rian asked as he sat down at a table at Starbucks, the author’s shorter friend’s crack-house. The thing about Rian is that no matter whom he gets in a relationship with, he always seemed to be with them for the long run, but even when they broke up, they were still friends. Alex didn’t quite understand how Rian did or if he drugged them into being nice, but the author surely knew that if he was going to get out of the situation with Taylor, he was going to need his help.

“I mean, I was nice to her, just not often. She wasn’t used to me, and we all know I’m an asshole, if you get used to me, but it’s just that my ways didn’t really sit well with her.” Alex explained before taking a sip of his drink, a Caramel Flan Latte that Rian insisted he had to try.

Rian hummed as he nodded slightly. “Wow, so someone actually had enough of your bullshit and was willing to let you know instead of being a coward and not knowing? That’s fucking amazing, I have to meet her.” He said with a chuckle, only to get a punch in the arm from Alex. “Alright, alright, I think I figured out your problem.”

Alex stared at Rian as he waited for the solution to all his women issues, not that he had much in the first place. “And that would be…?” He asked after a few seconds of silence.

“Oh yeah, you just need to humble up a bit. Do you like her?” Rian asked as he raised an eyebrow, which made Alex’s cheeks turn red a bit.

“N-No, I don’t like her more than just a person. You know? Like, I like you, but I don’t like like you.”

Alex just watched as his friend blinked at him with a dumbfounded expression on his face. “Are you fucking 11? I don’t like like you.” Rian mimicked. “Alex, wake the fuck up. You obviously want to do more than just stick your dick inside of her. You want to talk about your feelings and shit and know what her opinion is on your terrible choice of bedding colors.”

“Okay, first of all, no I don’t. I don’t need to talk to anyone about my feelings because I’m a man, I don’t have feelings. And as for my bedding, fuck you. It doesn’t really matter when I’m fucking someone into the mattress.” Alex replied with a smirk as Rian rolled his eyes.

“Whatever, man. You wanted my advice and I gave it to her. You’re obviously falling hard for her, so either do something about it or suffer.” Rian responded before looking at his watch. “I have to go; Cass and I are going to go to dinner with my parents. We’re going to Bluestone.” He stated with a grin as he stood up, Alex doing the same a few seconds after.

“Alright, try not to get your panties in a bunch, Ri. I’ll try to listen to what you said.”

“You fucking better, and when you two get married, I better get a great speech on how I helped you get her back.” Rian said with a small laugh before sliding his sunglasses on. “But yeah, I know you’ll do fine, just talk to her and don’t be an ass.” He warned Alex as he walked towards the door.

“I won’t, maybe, no promises.” Alex replied with a sigh as they walked out the door. “I’ll see you later though.” He said as he patted Rian on the back before going to his car. A long sigh soon left his mouth as he thought about Rian said. It wasn’t that he liked her, at least he didn’t know if he liked her. He shook the thought and started his car before leaving to go to the bookstore, maybe he can be that asshole that purchases his own book. As he drove, the words kept ringing in his ears. Do you like her? The question continued being heard in Alex’s mind, which only made him question it even more instead of ignoring it. He definitely did not like Taylor, of course not.