Status: Chapters coming...
The Short Life and Tragic Death of Stevie Daniels
Overprotective.
One thing that I’ve learn from life, is that people have many different sides to them. Some you know about and some you don’t. Some you are comfortable with and some you are not. But you have to take everybody in as a whole. Liking just one side of person does no good for anyone.
John, like most, has many different sides than most, but the three I have seen the most are pretty good. They’re is the one I met as first. Very serious, very into music, not wavering and strict when it came to himself. Lets just say that if this was the only side John had, we wouldn’t be dating. It still comes out every now and then and I still don’t like it, but I can appreciate it. This was the size that comforted me when I felt bad. This was the side that made all of that fantastic music.
Then, as we became friends I began to notice other things about him. More importantly this goofy, younger side of him. The one that really made me fall for him. It was the polar opposite of the first side I saw. This side was the kind that would pick me up and throw me over his shoulder when I complained about being lazy. The kind that sprayed me with a hose during warp tour. The kind that took the chance and kissed me for the first time on the apex of a roller coaster.
Finally there was a side, that hopefully, I was the only one seeing. It was John in love. It came out only when we were alone and only when one of the other two weren’t in action. This one kissed me passionately. This one held my hand, and took me out to dinner, this was the one that asked me to move in with him.
Now I know John is much more complex then just three sides, most people are, but that is how I made sense of him. Isn’t that what brains do? Take the chaos of the world and make order out of it. Thats all I was trying to do.
So when John showed up at the hospital the second day I was in and I saw this new side of him, I was thrown for a loop.
He didn’t rush into the room like some stupid romantic comedy, fall to his knees next to my bed and sob like a little girl.
When I heard his voice outside my room, talking to a bandmate of mine, I ghosted though the door to see him. I’d been practicing at this whole not being connected to my body thing, and for someone without a teacher I think I was learning pretty well. Lets just say if their was a school for this, I’d be in the advanced track.
John paced outside my door, not looking into the windows the showed me, or rather my sleeping body.
It was nice to see him, regardless of how tired and drained he looked. I’d missed him. It had been a month since i’d sen him. Regardless of the fact that we live together, touring made stuff difficult.
Finally he stopped pacing and shook his arms out. “Just go in John. Just be there for her.” He closed his eyes for a bit and then opened them before turning and opening the door.
He froze the second he got into the room. “Oh Stevie.” he whispered as the door closed behind him. I knew my body looked pathetic, but he just looked deviated, torn apart. It took him a minute to take in the picture. The girl he loved, laying pale and lifeless on a hospital bed. I know I wouldn’t be able to take it if it were the other way around.
He walked slowly to the bed and leaned down to touch my face. “At least you’re still warm.” he whispered. He kissed my forehead and looked at the machine that was motoring my heartbeat. “You know in movies when the love of your life kisses you, you’re heartbeat is supposed to speed up.” he chuckled cynically.
My heart did speed up when he kissed me. From the first time to the last time, the last time I was awake that is. I felt jealous of the girl in the bed, regardless of the fact I knew it was me. She was getting his attention and didn’t even know how to react to it properly.
"Stevie, you know you can’t die on me. You know that right?" he said walking around my bed to it in the chair next to my bed. He took my limp and and placed it in his pathetically. "I know that you never do anything I say." he laughed. "And I love that about you, but you just can’t die. You can’t do it."
He sighed and dropped my hand, but it was one of those strobe like sighs. “Oh god, baby.” he put his head in his hand and they came back a little damp. Not too damp, but a little.
Baby, I said, though I know he couldn’t hear me. I don’t wanna die. I’m gonna try my hardest.
I really wish he could hear me, The fact that my reassurances weren’t getting though to him was tearing me apart, and there was nothing I could do about it.
John, like most, has many different sides than most, but the three I have seen the most are pretty good. They’re is the one I met as first. Very serious, very into music, not wavering and strict when it came to himself. Lets just say that if this was the only side John had, we wouldn’t be dating. It still comes out every now and then and I still don’t like it, but I can appreciate it. This was the size that comforted me when I felt bad. This was the side that made all of that fantastic music.
Then, as we became friends I began to notice other things about him. More importantly this goofy, younger side of him. The one that really made me fall for him. It was the polar opposite of the first side I saw. This side was the kind that would pick me up and throw me over his shoulder when I complained about being lazy. The kind that sprayed me with a hose during warp tour. The kind that took the chance and kissed me for the first time on the apex of a roller coaster.
Finally there was a side, that hopefully, I was the only one seeing. It was John in love. It came out only when we were alone and only when one of the other two weren’t in action. This one kissed me passionately. This one held my hand, and took me out to dinner, this was the one that asked me to move in with him.
Now I know John is much more complex then just three sides, most people are, but that is how I made sense of him. Isn’t that what brains do? Take the chaos of the world and make order out of it. Thats all I was trying to do.
So when John showed up at the hospital the second day I was in and I saw this new side of him, I was thrown for a loop.
He didn’t rush into the room like some stupid romantic comedy, fall to his knees next to my bed and sob like a little girl.
When I heard his voice outside my room, talking to a bandmate of mine, I ghosted though the door to see him. I’d been practicing at this whole not being connected to my body thing, and for someone without a teacher I think I was learning pretty well. Lets just say if their was a school for this, I’d be in the advanced track.
John paced outside my door, not looking into the windows the showed me, or rather my sleeping body.
It was nice to see him, regardless of how tired and drained he looked. I’d missed him. It had been a month since i’d sen him. Regardless of the fact that we live together, touring made stuff difficult.
Finally he stopped pacing and shook his arms out. “Just go in John. Just be there for her.” He closed his eyes for a bit and then opened them before turning and opening the door.
He froze the second he got into the room. “Oh Stevie.” he whispered as the door closed behind him. I knew my body looked pathetic, but he just looked deviated, torn apart. It took him a minute to take in the picture. The girl he loved, laying pale and lifeless on a hospital bed. I know I wouldn’t be able to take it if it were the other way around.
He walked slowly to the bed and leaned down to touch my face. “At least you’re still warm.” he whispered. He kissed my forehead and looked at the machine that was motoring my heartbeat. “You know in movies when the love of your life kisses you, you’re heartbeat is supposed to speed up.” he chuckled cynically.
My heart did speed up when he kissed me. From the first time to the last time, the last time I was awake that is. I felt jealous of the girl in the bed, regardless of the fact I knew it was me. She was getting his attention and didn’t even know how to react to it properly.
"Stevie, you know you can’t die on me. You know that right?" he said walking around my bed to it in the chair next to my bed. He took my limp and and placed it in his pathetically. "I know that you never do anything I say." he laughed. "And I love that about you, but you just can’t die. You can’t do it."
He sighed and dropped my hand, but it was one of those strobe like sighs. “Oh god, baby.” he put his head in his hand and they came back a little damp. Not too damp, but a little.
Baby, I said, though I know he couldn’t hear me. I don’t wanna die. I’m gonna try my hardest.
I really wish he could hear me, The fact that my reassurances weren’t getting though to him was tearing me apart, and there was nothing I could do about it.