Passion Beyond Illusion

Julliana came running into the room at lighting speed with a big smile on her face. She seemed really excited about something, and more hyper than she usually was. I automatically assumed that Starlene’s friend let her overindulge in sugar and I smiled to myself, laughing at the thought, Julliana always went crazy when she ate a lot of sugar.
“Mommy!” she yelled as she ran into her mother’s arms, giving her a giant bear hug.
“Hi sweetie,” Starlene cooed, releasing her younger daughter from the hug, pushing a strand of blue hair out of her face, her eyes fixating on the door as if she were waiting for someone. “Aunt Eris!” the bouncy two year old toddler screamed as she ran into my arms and almost knocked the breath out of me when she gave me a hug. I smiled and ruffled her hair a bit, “did you have fun today?” I asked. “Yeah!” she replied a huge smile on her face, “I got a lot of cool stuff.” “Did you really?” I asked her, wondering who in their right mind would get the spoiled child whatever she wants, “yup!” she replied flashing me a huge grin. I laughed and then looked to the door as another figure approached.

The tall figure stalked into the room, with a confident swagger and admirable grace. I was delighted to discover that the stranger sashaying into the room was a gorgeous man and the closer he approached, the better glimpse I was able to catch. The red highlights were a perfect contrast to his medium length dark hair, and he had the most beautiful shade of brown eyes I had ever seen, this man was a work of art on two legs. He didn’t seem to be too much older than I was and he seemed to posses a great build, not too muscular, but not too skinny either. I wonder what he would look like shirtless? I quickly scolded myself for that thought, this guy was probably Starlene’s boyfriend and I really shouldn’t be thinking like that. But he was so damn hot it was hard not to have those sort of thoughts.

He gave me a friendly smile and a small “hello” as he passed by me and made his way from the door to the side of Nadyia’s bed. I smiled back and began to get up from the seat and offer it to him but he held a hand up to stop me. “You’re good,” he said smiling once more, a slight laughing tone present in his voice. God, he had such a nice smile, I could stare at it for hours on end. And his voice, he has such a velvety voice, I could listen to him ramble on for days .It was the kind of voice, that could soothe even the most rabid animal. His voice caused my heart skipped a few beats. Oh great, here I go acting like a giddy hormonal teenager again. I felt kind of bad about taking the seat from him, especially if he was the one who had watched Julliana all day, the poor guy must be exhausted. I was about to get up again, and insist he take my seat, but then I seen him walk clear to the other side of the room and pick up another chair and I instantly felt better. I assumed that he was going to set the chair down on the other side of Nadyia, closer to the side of the room where he got the chair, but instead, he set it down next to me. Me, he set it down to next to me! Ah, crap here I go again.

At this point, Starlene looked over and had taken note to the change, she was already climbing to her feet. “Well, I guess it’s time for introductions,” she addressed aloud looking from me to the living, breathing piece of art next to me. “Eris,” she started turning her head in my direction, then jolting it and motioning towards the guy, “this is my best friend, Criss, he’s helped me to get know my way around Vegas for the last few years and we’ve been best friends since I’ve moved here.” She took a breathe, pausing a bit before adding “not my boyfriend, just my best friend. For some reason, everyone always thinks we’re dating, I don’t get it.” Criss started laughing, his laugh implying that what Starlene had said was entirely true. So, he wasn’t dating my sister after all, maybe I actually stand a chance with the guy. He probably has a girlfriend already though, the logical part of my brain that was normally right said, disrupting my fantasy and pulling me back into reality. Truth be told, I hoped my brain was wrong. I mean it wouldn’t surprise me if he did have a girlfriend, he was gorgeous, but a girl could still dream, right? Just the thought that maybe he was single and that I may just have a chance with someday made me blush. Hopefully nobody took notice to it, that would be awfully embarrassing. “And Criss,” Starlene’s voice caught me off guard. “This is my sister Eris, she lives in Michigan but she came right away when she found out about Nadyia.”

“Hello Eris, it‘s a pleasure to finally meet you,” Criss greeted me with a warm smile, holding one of his brilliantly crafted hands out in front of me. “It’s nice to meet you too Criss,” I agreed as I grabbed his hand and shook it, flashing him my most pleasant smile possible. He touched my hand and touched his! my mind screamed excitedly as I reverted into hormonal teenage mode again. “Ya, know…” he started, instantly grabbing my attention with his angelic voice and forcing me to jolt my head his direction. “Starlene‘s practically talked my tin ear off, telling me so much about you,” he smiled again, his beautiful, contagious smile, I can’t help but to smile back at him. “Has she really?” I asked, probably sounding half annoyed as I threw a glare in her direction, which went unnoticed, as usual. “So…how was your trip?” he asked me, obviously trying to make conversation. “It was long, but it went pretty smoothly overall,” I answered honestly, but I was not about to tell this gorgeous man I just met like five minutes ago I almost had multiple mental breakdowns. “How was your day?” I added quickly, kicking myself in the ass for not asking him that a few seconds earlier. I knew I probably sounded like some idiot who didn’t know how to hold a proper conversation, but what can I say, I’m awkward like that. “Oh,” that seemed to catch him off guard, finally, I’ve made this man, who takes advantage of his power to articulate perfectly, completely speechless. Victory for Eris, the crowd goes wild! I laughed at my little role-play in my head, but I was happy that I was able to catch Criss off guard at least one time tonight. “Well, I’m tired as hell, considering Julliana is very hyper-active and has been driving me up the wall all day,” he chuckled, as if it greatly amused him. I couldn’t help but to laugh myself, it was true, Julliana could drive even the calmest person to drink. “I heard you spoiled my niece all day,” I brought up, which caused Criss to laugh once again. “Who told you that?” he demanded, his grin widening a bit more, I turned my head in my two year old niece’s direction, then back to Criss. “Julliana!” Criss scolded playfully, “have you been telling your aunt Eris our little secrets?” “Noooo,” she retorted in the most adorable manner ever, causing us both burst into a fit of giggles once again, This apparently had a domino effect because it was only a matter of time before Starlene started cracking up as well, followed by Nadyia, then finally Julliana, the five us were howling in laughter like a bunch of crazies. Sometimes, Julliana was too cute for own good, which is why I loved her so much. The laughing started to slow down for a bit, our laughing becoming out of unison which then caused it start up again. At this point, I was laughing so intensely that I failed to notice the legs of my chair weren’t on the ground, so it tipped back, and I went tumbling onto the ground, suddenly all the laugher ceased, and the giggles turned to shrieks of concern.

“Eris!” Criss and Starlene cried in unison, the two of them leaping up from their seats and rushing over towards me. I bumped my head on my way down and everything started to get blurry, but I could still make out the two figures looking down on me. Criss held his hand out to me almost instantiously, and I instinctively grabbed it, allowing Criss to help me to my feet. “ Are you okay?” he asked me once I was back on my feet again, his voice full of genuine concern. No, I’m not, I just want to jump in your arms and cry, I want everything to be okay. “I’m fine,” I answered quickly, attempting to hide the fact that my fall had embarrassed me greatly, but the reddening of my face had given me away. Guaranteed Criss had taken notice. It was hard not to considering the fact that I was turning the very color of his highlights. Why do I have to always be so awkward around cute guys, I wondered. Seriously, my awkwardness pissed me off most of the time. That’s probably why I always had trouble getting a boyfriend, well a decent one that is. I had to swallow the lump that was slowly rising to my throat, I’d embarrassed myself in front of a breathing piece of art and there was no taking it back now. “Eris?” there was that deep sexy voice again, “are you sure you’re okay?” He’d apparently taken notice to my mood change, and he was being really compassionate about it; he actually cared. It seemed rather peculiar to me the more I thought about it, Criss and I had just met, yet he was already acting as if we’d been life-long friends. It was actually really comforting to know he cared about me already. It meant we could become really good friends and that I would have someone who was there for me. I don’t have a lot of friends, so it would mean a lot to me if we could form a friendship. “Yeah, I’m just tired,” I replied, it was the truth though, I was exhausted. “Why don’t you just sit down for a bit,” he suggested, his voice soft and sincere as he flipped my chair back up to where it belonged. “That’s a good idea,” I admitted as I headed back to my seat, which was still next to Criss’s, yet it somehow seemed a little closer. “Eris, are you okay?” Starlene asked me, after everyone was back in their seats. “I’m fine,” I responded for what felt like the thousandth time that night. She nodded and the room suddenly became dead silent, a feeling of awkwardness filling the room. The silence lasted for a good fifteen minutes, well it felt like fifteen minutes or more, it was a long time. “Sooooo,” Criss was the one to break the silence, “how long are you staying?” Ah crap, he caught me off guard again, I could feel my face grow hot once again, probably turning the color of a cardinal in accompaniment. Damn it, Eris, stop turning into a complete dunce whenever a cute guy is around. I pondered a bit, trying to find the words which seemed to have gotten lost in my jumbled brain, when suddenly, I heard a smidge of chuckling coming from my left. Criss was probably laughing at the fact, that I was blushing and I probably seemed like a total idiot to him now, which of course made me blush even harder. Guaranteed I was redder than a sun burnt lobster at this point. Oddly, enough, Criss’s laughter got harder as I blushed even more, it was almost as if he could read my mind. But, this guy couldn’t possibly read my mind, right? He was just a normal guy, wasn’t he? I mean there is no way this guy had the power to read my mind, he wasn’t a mentalist right? “Uh…Eris?” he asked, waving one of his brilliantly crafted hands in front of me, pulling me out of my scrambled thoughts and bringing me back to reality. “Oh,” I gasped realization finally processing what Criss had asked me earlier, “I’ll be here for five days,” I responded at last. I genuinely wished I could stay for longer(especially since I had just met this cute guy) but my budget wouldn’t allow me to, my bag only held enough for five days and I had to get back to my job as well. “Oh…,” he sighed, hanging his head low and giving me the impression that he was rather downhearted about it. I wonder why he seems so crestfallen about my departure, which isn’t happening for a few more days, then I thought maybe, just maybe, he liked me. Keep dreaming sister, the realistic side of my brain taunted me once again; you just met him, he can’ t possibly be that fond of you already. Ugh, why did my brain always have to ruin my hopes, why couldn’t it let me bask in my imaginary world for once? Because then you wouldn’t be cable of differentiating fantasy from reality, my brain replied, answering my rhetorical question. I caught myself starting to get to lost in my thoughts again, and realized that I better say something soon, I didn’t want to loose the interest Criss seemed to have in me so soon. “I do plan to make the best of it though,” I said, in an attempt to lift his spirits, “I’ll definitely want to explore a bit.” I profoundly hoped that he would offer to show me around, I would gladly accept the offer, no second thoughts about it. Criss picked his head up and a little at my words and a smile crawled onto his face, “I could show you around if you’d like,” he offered, it was like my prayers had been answered. Or, Criss could have read my mind again(if he could read minds that is.) “Thanks,” I smiled, “that’d be great.” At this point, Criss had lifted his up completely and the small smile on his face had grown more than twice its original size.
“So when would you like me to show you around?” he asked. Anytime is fine by me, gorgeous. The question caught me off guard once again, damn it, how does he always manage to do that. “Whenever you have the time,” I responded, “it’s no dire rush to show me around.” “Is Friday alright?” It was already Wednesday night so Friday was right around the corner, luckily, I wouldn’t have to wait too long to spend some time with Criss. “Friday’s perfect,” I replied with grin, hell yeah, spending some time with Criss on Friday. “That’s great!” he commented with another friendly smile, “so Friday it is then!”
I beamed at Criss to show him my approval, I didn’t really know what else to say and I didn’t want to transition into a half-wit again, so I decided to keep my response subtle.

There was another concise moment of silence and again, it was rather maladroit. How many awkward moments are we going to have tonight? On the other hand though, that single maladroit moment of the total absence of conversation got me thinking. A thought that hit me like a brick and seemed to strike me funny was that fact that Criss looked oddly familiar. It was almost like I’d seen him, well his face somewhere before, but I couldn’t quite place where I remembered him from. Well, whether I could figure out where I’d seen him or not, it was impossible to ignore the fact that the guy was sexy as hell. Definitely easy on the eyes, actually he’d be a treat for the eyes. The silence continued on ad infinitum, or it seemed like it lasted for an eternity, maybe it was just because I was socially awkward. I was getting fed up with all the silence, I was going to freak if someone didn’t say something soon, and it wasn’t a pretty sight when I started to freak out. Curse my social anxiety. I don’t really feel the need to go into detail about what happens exactly, I’ll just leave it at, it’s not a pretty sight. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the silence was broken. Even though this time the silence was broken by Julliana screaming and running around like a chicken with its head cut off instead of Criss, I was grateful. Let’s hear it for crazy two year olds hyped up on sugar, yay!

Starlene chuckled a little at the sight of her youngest daughter, running around in circles, letting out way too many high pitched shrieks at the top of her lungs. In fact, Julliana was almost squealing like a young piglet. I tried to stifle a giggle but I couldn’t help it, Julliana was far too adorable. It was hard not to laugh at her when she did cute two year old things. As Julliana got louder, the whole situation turned even more humorous, which caused me to do something I would’ve never done at any other time, I threw a playful glare in Criss’s direction. “Never let her indulge in that much sugar again,” I scolded him, the playfulness still lingering in my voice. Criss turned his attention in my direction and his reaction to my mock chiding honestly amazed the hell out of me. He grinned from ear to ear and instantly fired back a flirty rebuttal, “like I was supposed to be aware of the fact, she turns into the most insane toddler in the world,” he refuted. His voice definitely had that I’m-flirting-with-you kind of vibe in it, and I honestly, I loved that it did. If there was just one more thing I had to admit tonight, it was that Criss had an utterly sexy voice when he was flirting. “How much sugar did she have anyway?” I asked, I wasn’t really that curious to know how much she ingested, that question was just a feeble attempt to keep the conversation alive. He looked in my direction over at me and covered his mouth like he was trying to restrain from cracking up. I noticed a light red color come onto his face and I quickly realized that he was blushing. It was the first time I’d seen him blush all night and honestly, I liked it. He looked kind of…adorable when he was embarrassed, something I definitely wouldn’t tire of any time soon. “You don’t want to know” he warned answering my question from earlier, doing the best he could not to laugh “just trust me, you do not want to know.” I took that as an indication that she ingested an over abundant amount of sugar, way more than she was supposed to have so Criss must’ve really spoiled her. It wasn’t like she needed to be spoiled though, she got plenty of attention and got almost everything she wanted. Her mommy did a really job with that.

I couldn’t help but to snicker a bit at the thought(and at the tone of voice that Criss was using to flirt with me) and before I knew it, I was cackling like a witch. Apparently my giggling was a little boisterous, because everyone in the room had turned to look at me, and Criss had a Cheshire Cat smirk on his face. “You have an adorable laugh,” he remarked, the smile failing to fade from his face, the flirty tone in his voice still very profuse, his captivating hazel-brown eyes twinkling as he held his gaze on me for a few brief yet exhilarating moments. As soon as the words came fluttering out of his mouth, I could feel my face grow hot and I knew that my cheeks were probably redder than the highlights in his hair. “Thanks,” I smiled, giggling softly as I turned my face away his direction, praying that my obvious blushing wouldn’t give me away. “And…” he started, scooting his chair closer to me, before gently taking my chin and his hand, and turning my head to face him, “you have the most beautiful pair of eyes I’ve ever seen.”
“Thank you,” I giggled again, damn I was really turning into a giddy teenager around Criss and I was twenty-two years old. I guess he just had the power to do that me…er girls, because chances are there were a lot of girls who got that way around him.
“You’re welcome,” he smiled, “and you’re really cute when you blush.” Well, that’s a first, I’ve never had a guy tell me I was cute when I blushed, I was quiet frankly, very flattered by his words. “Don’t you dare say thank you again,” he laughed, “or you’ll blush even more and get even more adorable. Of course, that comment made my face turn ten times redder than it had any other time that night. I might as well just turn into a tomato since my face was probably going to stay that way. “There you go…” he observed,
“getting more and more adorable by the second.” Damn it, stop complimenting me, you’re going to make me faint from blushing too much, I yelled at him in my head. I didn’t really know if it was possible to faint from blushing so much, but I really didn’t want to find out either. Maybe Criss will help you if you do end up fainting, my brain suggested, causing me to quickly shake that thought out of my head. My brain was seriously going to get me into trouble one of these days…or make me loose a chance with an insanely charming guy, which would really suck. Hopefully I met a really great guy someday, who would be able to handle my awkwardness and love me unconditionally no matter what. I know it was probably just wishful thinking on my part, but I genuinely hoped that I could meet a guy like that someday. Any guy like that would be “perfect” in my eyes, among other desirable personality traits(like loyalty, honesty, kindness, etc.), looks weren’t all that important to me, good looks was just an irresistible bonus for me.
Unfortunately, I hadn’t had much luck in my past relationships, both guys had been complete assholes. Boy did I know how to pick a winner, I could spot them from a mile away.

I was just about to start another conversation with the sexy human masterpiece sitting beside me, when Starlene’s voice cut in. “Hey Eris, it’s ten- thirty,” she informed me,
“do you want to stay and talk some more, or do you want to turn in for the night?”
Ten-thirty? I’d been talking (especially to Criss) for over hours, a new record for me.
“Is it really that late?” I asked, well aware of the shock in my voice. “Yeah, believe it or not it is, we’ve been here almost two and a half hours,” she confirmed. Criss didn’t show up until about fifteen to twenty minutes after Starlene and I did, so two and half hours seemed pretty accurate. “I didn’t realize it was that late either,” Criss commented, “time flew by pretty damn quick tonight.” “Well you know what they say,” Starlene suggested, “time flies by when you’re having have.” Criss laughed when she recited the age old idiom and I looked over at him and smiled, noticing for the first time tonight that he was dressed in an Affliction shirt and distressed jeans, which were accompanied by a pair of Harley Davison motorcycle boots. The look went really well with his multiple necklaces and multiple rings and pants chain, he looked like a rock star straight from the pages of Revolver magazine. He was definitely easy on the eyes, well…easy on my eyes anyway. I swear any woman who did not find this man attractive had to be insane.
“So Eris, you ready to turn in for the night?” Starlene asked me again. I completely forgot about that, guess I was just too preoccupied ogling at Criss. “It is late,” Criss agreed, “you probably should get some sleep.” He was right, I could really use some sleep; it’d been a long day and I was exhausted. “Yeah, I guess so,” I responded at last, though I wasn’t entirely sure if I was responding to Starlene’s earlier question or agreeing with Criss’s statement. Either way, I was ready to hit the hay for tonight. Besides, I’d be coming back tomorrow and I was going to be seeing Criss again on Friday.
“Come on,” she urged getting up from her spot on Nadyia’s bed, “I’ll take you to the hotel.” “Thanks,” I said, getting up from the chair I’d been sitting for the last two and half hours. “I’ll be back,” she called to Criss as she started towards me, “I’m just taking Eris to her room.” “Alright,” he shrugged, “I’ll stay here with Nadyia and Julliana until you get back.” What a great guy, he’d make the perfect boyfriend; shut up brain.
“Thanks, you’re the best,” Starlene gushed before turning her attention back to me.
“You ready?” she questioned me one last time, almost as if she wanted to make sure that I was really to leave. “Ready as I’ll ever be,” I replied with my usual response to the question. I said goodbye to Nadyia and Julliana and gave them each hugs before making my way to Criss. Now say goodbye to him without making it awkward, I told myself taking a deep breath, preparing myself to start the farewell. “It was nice meeting you,” I bid my farewell with a smile on face and my hand extended. “It was nice meeting you too,” he returned holding out his hand like he was going to shake it, but instead, doing something that really surprised me. He grabbed my hand, only to pull me into a hug which took me by total surprise, but nonetheless, I returned the hug. All I can say is that was the best damn hug, I’d ever received, Criss was an amazing hugger. “See ya soon,” he said, releasing me from the hug. “Yeah, I’ll see you soon,” I agreed, grinning at him before making my way to the door where Starlene was waiting for me. I looked back at Criss one last time as Starlene whisked me out the door. He smiled at me and gave a small wave before calling out one last thing to me. His final words of the night continued to echo through my mind, his voice lyrically smooth, “sweet dreams, Eris.”