Me, You

“He’s getting better, you know,” Sophia walked up beside me, arms crossed.

We stood in the hallway, peeking through the door window, watching Liam and John interact. The minute we walked into the hospital room this morning, Liam kept his promised and asked to speak to John alone. I had no idea what they were talking about or why Liam even wanted to talk to him in the first place. But, there was something strangely comforting seeing John and my father get along.

She continued without a response, “He’s been responding well to treatment, but overall, I think he’s much happier now that you’re here.”

“I honestly didn’t think he’d give much of a thought about me coming to New York,” I admitted.

“Oh he has,” Sophia said, “He was worried that you or your mom had thrown away the letter.”

My mom. Had she figured out I’d come to see my biological father?

“Well, I’m glad I didn’t.”

“He really wanted a kid,” She sighed, “But, it never worked out.”

“I’m sorry,” I turned and got a good look of her.

Sophia was the same age as Liam and my mother, but faint wrinkles ran along her face and her hair was noticeably graying. I couldn’t recall seeing any wrinkles on my mom or Jenny before. But, Sophia looked tired. It was obvious that the past few years have caught up to her, having to take care of Liam.

“It’s okay, because he has you now,” Sophia smiled, “I mean, that is, if you chose to keep him in your life.”

She was right. I had the choice to cut him out of my life because I was an adult and he was never legally bounded in the first place.

“I know Liam’s never been in my life and most kids would be resentful, but I’m not. It’s no one’s fault that we’re like this, just how life went. And. I turned out alright, so I have nothing to feel spiteful for.” My breath caught when Liam leaned over and gave John a pat on the back, “I want him in my life now and hopefully make up for lost time.”

Sophia nodded and smiled. I grew up with the images of stepmothers from Cinderella, cruel and ruthless. But, Sophia wasn’t cruel or ruthless. She brought us to Liam in the first place. Maybe, it would’ve taken longer convincing to see him without her or we wouldn’t have seen him at all. She would never compare to my mom, but that didn’t matter. She wanted us here.

“Let’s get out of here, having a cup of coffee or something.”

I took one last look at John and Liam and decided I couldn’t just sit here and watch them for the rest of the night. Following Sophia out the door, I was surprised when she didn’t call a cab, but instead, began walking.

I followed closely behind her as she began narrating her time here. She was a New York City girl, working part time at a restaurant, where she met Liam. When they got married, they moved up to Albany where a chemical engineering job was waiting for Liam. It was good pay, but inhaling so much toxic fumes was why he was in this situation in the first place.

“This must’ve been hard on you,”

I didn’t know if she didn’t hear me or just chose to ignore, but she stopped and said, “We’re here.”

The fluorescent sign with the words ‘The Daily Grind’ flashed at us through the window. Inside, hipsters and business men alike stood in line.

“‘Voted the best coffee and best cafe in the Capital District.’” I read the cardboard sign dimly lighted by the fluorescent one.

I guess she saw the look on my face and reassured me, “Seems like all coffee houses are saying that nowadays. But, I promise you. This is the place.”

It wasn’t that I didn’t believe the sign. I was never a frequent coffee drinker. Neither was John. His choice of liquid was beer and the occasional green tea. Coffee was for days he couldn’t stay up on his own. I followed the same law.

Saying nothing, I followed Sophia into the slightly cramped cafe. The smell of the coffee beans hit me in a wave the minute I walked in. Despite the long line and impatient customers, the workers got the line moving and soon enough, we were next.

The barista with a name tag that said ‘Corey’ gave us a bright smile and asked, “What can I help you with today?”

“Pick anything you want, everything’s good here,” Sophia nudged me forward.

Scanning the menu, I ordered two roasted coffees, black, knowing John who’d probably ask to share later. Sophia then ordered ‘The Elvis,’ which turned out to be a banana and peanut butter smoothie.

Armed with our beverages, we walked out of the coffee shop with the night slowly approaching. An unfamiliar chill went up my spine and I shuddered. The coldest summer night in Arizona was probably equivalent to the hottest afternoon on the east coast.

Sophia watched as I pulled the coffee closer to my chest, stealing the heat. She chuckled, “So, John tells me that you two were childhood friends?”

“Yeah, our mom’s grew up together on the same street and became best friends. It was inevitable that John and I would be stuck with each other.”

“But, you guys didn’t have to become best friends. You two are really close. I mean, you don’t travel across the US with somebody for nothing,” Sophia said.

She had a point. John travelling across the country with me was just the tip of the iceberg. Below the water was years and years’ worth of times he’s saved my ass or I’ve saved his. There was nothing that came to mind as to why we have for the past eighteen years. It was just the way it was. John cared for me and I cared for him.

“I guess that’s true,” I responded, even though a guess wasn’t necessary.

At the hospital, Sophia held the door for me as I scurried from the cool New York evening. We walked past the front desk of the hospital with a small wave to Martha, the secretary from the first night, “I’ve had my fair share of best friends, Louise. And none of them have really stuck it out with me for eighteen years like you and John have.”

“I’m just lucky to have him,”

We peeked through the room window where Liam and John were talking earlier. Although this time, they weren’t talking. They sat straight forward, not watching the TV or anything. Only occasionally, I saw them grin and move their mouths.

I opened the door and that’s when I heard the music, “Can we come in?”

They nodded, not bothering to look over at us.

“What are you guys playing?” Sophia asked.

“George Harrison,” John responded, still staring off.

“The dude from the Beatles?” I walked over and nudged John with the coffee cup.

“Yeah, but it’s some of his solo stuff,” He blinked a few times before fully realizing our presence. He looked up at me with a giant grin, “Black?” I nodded and handed him the coffee that had slightly gone cold from our trip back, “Thanks, Lou.”

“So what have you guys been up to?” Sophia walked over to open the curtains that revealed a bustling Albany alive with nightlife.
“Not much, I got to know this guy,” Liam leaned over and patted John back, “And found out this kid loves music, so I brought out my records.” He gestured to the turntable that was now sitting on the bedside table.

“Sounds like a good time,” Sophia looked at her watch, “Well, it’s getting late and think you need some rest, Liam.”

She looked at us apologetically and I said, “See you two tomorrow?”

“I’d like that very much,” Liam nodded, slipping out a yawn.

John stood up from his chair next to the hospital bed. Liam motioned for him to come closer. He leaned down as Liam whispered something to him. I could’ve imagined it, but I swore their eyes flickered over to me at the same time. John chuckled and told him to have a nice night.

When we walked out to the parking lot, I asked, “What did Liam say to you?”

“I don’t think I can tell you,” He laughed, unlocking the truck.

“Oh,” I furrowed my eyebrows and sat in the passenger seat. What on earth could Liam and John need to hide from me? “Well, I’m glad today went well for you two.”

“Don’t worry, there’s no way I can replace his only daughter,” He ruffled my hair.

“It’s not that...” I paused, “I’m just trying to understand how you and Liam can be keeping secrets from me already.”

He started up the engine, “Your father loves you and I love you, there is nothing to worry about, I promise.”

My love for John intensified that moment.

I leaned over and gripped his hand tight for the rest of the drive.