You're My Only Cure

He was sitting in a coffee shop - in fact, it was their favorite coffee shop; here he met her, and yes, here he fell in love with her... and here for so many years they came to enjoy even the small good things that happened. Or he just took her on a date here after a hard day at work; ordering for them hot chocolate and promising a foot massage as soon as they get home.

He smiled at these memories, looking at the crowded street. A week before Christmas.

Madness.

John noticed her getting out of her car and the first thing that came to his mind was that she was gorgeous. Blonde hair, blushed cheeks, full lips. She took his breath away. Just like the first time when he saw her. And for the first time in so long. He couldn't even remember when was the last time he held her in his arms. Or when he said he loved her... Because he did. He loved her, after all that had happened; even when he screwed up so much. And it wasn't fair to her. And although at the beginning he was furious, now he wasn't surprised by what she did. And she broke his heart. Probably as hard as he broke hers.

Most of his relationships - if hooking up with random girls you can call a relationship - had been shitty as well. But he was fine with that. Not with shitty relationships; with hooking up with random girls. Some of them stayed a little longer in his life, but some were just a night stand. He knew the rules, girls knew the rules. And it perfectly worked out. But by the time..

Who would have thought that Elise Roxanne Adams was the girl that he could say to his friends, yes, she's the one who changed my life... She wasn't perfect; no but when they were laying down on his bed and she fit his arms so easily, when she was dragging her lips on his neck...she was pretty damn close.

He was in love with every part of her soul and body. He loved her full breasts and that she was shorter than him - what wasn't that hard - so he could kiss her forehead when he hugged her. He loved her tattoos. God, even if some part of his body was covered in tattoos, he didn't think that a girl with seven tattoos could be sexy. Or that she, as an artist, let other artist make his art on her body. Anyway, every one of her tattoos was a part of her, each had its own story and it was so damn sexy.

She was kind of...brat. She was stubborn. She challenged him and pushed him. She loved to have those deep conversations where she asked him confusing questions that just pissed him off. But she was surprised him, all the time. He realized that his music needed one thing - her. She was his home, his calmness. Even if they had so loud fights that their neighbors wanted to call the police. And then, they had loud make up sex that, well...then the neighbors definitely wanted to do it.

They simply were made for each other. Everyone knew it. And it took him only eight months to buy her the biggest ring on what he could afford. In fact, he panicked. Just a little bit. When she got a letter with information about admission to UCLA, he imagined a campus full of boys. And the fact that he spent on the tour most of the year didn't help him too. So he proposed to her. She said yes. And it was the best decision they had ever made.

They got married. They spend their week nights eating cereal on the floor in their new apartment where was no furniture, a lot of boxes and mattress - because Sundays were days for making love. They went to the movies and sat in the back row, just to make out like teenagers.

And they finally painted the rooms of their new home, bought the furniture, fighting like crazy about color of the sofa or the choice between bathtub and shower cabin. And they got a picture of them on the wall - from their first date. It was a photo made with three photos from photobooth. On each one they were kissing. A lot.

They just had their perfect life with unmade bed and his notes with melody and lyrics of new songs written on them. She even got used to the fact that when he had the inspiration, he didn't pay attention to what he use as a notebook. Many times he used her essays to school or documents to work as a rough draft. But after a few months she stopped blame him. Each paper that finally was useless she hid in the box under the bed. She was an artist. She promised herself to do someday an exhibition of those papers.

John didn't even know how it happened that she let him love her forever. But it was all right.

And then he screwed up. She did it too as well. But he kept in his mind the fact he was the one who caused this situation. And maybe his stupid brother. But after a few weeks of sleepless nights, drinking and thinking about this, he took all the blame on himself. He was also going to admit it tomorrow, even if it was the most frightening thing in his entire life. Because he was going to lost her tomorrow. Although .... it happened a long time ago.

Elise pushed the large glass door and stepped inside. She didn't order hot chocolate as always. She just walked over him, not even sitting down.

"I took the rest of my stuff" she said, putting on the table the keys to their apartment. John looked at them and then he lifted his gaze to her.

"Elise..."

"John, don't. Don't make it harder than it already is, ok? You screwed up, I screwed up even more... " she shrugged. "See you tomorrow in court" she gave him a weak smile and she just turned around and left. His gaze followed her and he could swear that she started crying once she got in her car.